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Old 03-16-2010, 05:00 AM
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Day One

Today is day one. I got sober almost ten years ago, and then picked up for the last two years. I can't believe I'm back here--what they say about this being a progressive illness is true, and I hope that I have truly hit bottom and can recover again. I see that this forum offers a lot of support, and I know that I need a lot of help right now, both in AA and in places like this. Thanks to all--and here's to day one.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:17 AM
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Welcome to SR, citylights
It's a great place to be.

D
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:18 AM
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Welcome to SR citylights, I have a few friends in AA that got sober in the big apple, they say that one of the greatest things about NY is one can go to AA meetings 24X7 if they wish and also find any type of life style AA meetings.

You know it is one day at a time, you know what led to the relapse, you know the path to take, you have walked it before.

Brother I wish you well as you begin the journey again.... here is my hand..... take it & we can follow the path together.

BTW my name is Martin & I am an alcoholic.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:24 AM
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Welcome to SR, lots of great people and info here to help you stay sober this time. Congrats on the decision to get sober. Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:24 AM
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Thank you so much MArtin and Dee. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the hand and the faith and hope that you're offering. I'm going to have to use yours because I lost mine over the past few years, and am now willing to do whatever it takes to get it back. So bless you.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:41 AM
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Hi and welcome

You've got a good attitude there. Good luck!
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:47 AM
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thanks stayingfree. I already feel the group support.
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:55 AM
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Have you called your old sponsor? Have you started going back to meetings yet?
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:58 AM
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Citylights! (Love your name & love NYC) We're so glad you are here. I did the same thing - got sober for 3 years from '97-2000. Went on a date for the first time in ages & was offered wine - drank it. Back into hell I went for another 10 years. I really did it up big - in the end I was drinking 'round the clock & even 100 proof vodka wasn't getting the job done. Horrifying to think of now!

I came to SR and found everyone here was just like me. Who knew? I wasn't alone any more. I know you can lay it down, because I did - and I never dreamed I'd be over 2 yrs. sober once again. We're glad you are here with us - keep posting and reaching out. You are going to do it again - and this time it will stick.
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:11 AM
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Citylights do you mind sharing what led you to relapse?
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:12 AM
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Hevyn: Wow, what a similar story. I was sober for a long time, started dating a new person, was offered a drink, and took it. Began slowly at first, and now, two years later, I'm back at that horrible place--hiding it, rotating liquor stores, thinking about it constantly, drinking sometimes around the clock, quitting for a few days, and then going back to it. But you're right--we both put it down before, and your story really inspires me. Thank you.
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:16 AM
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Tazman: I think that the relapse was coming on for years. The short answer is that I stopped going to meetings. My old attitudes and negative thinking returned, especially since I lost a spiritual connection. I went through a difficult divorce (and stayed sober during that time), and then, one day, out on a date, I said why not? And I kept fooling myself for about six months that I could drink again like a "normal" person. But I've known for a long time that where this train was headed, and I guess that it had to get this bad (again) for me to end up here.
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:18 AM
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Tazman--I have tried meetings on and off, but I need to get committed (starting today!). I am also looking into an outpatient group to get more support.
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Old 03-16-2010, 07:21 AM
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Hi Citylights,

I have learned here at SR, that this disease is absolutely relentless.

Coming here will offer you support with your recovery.
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Old 03-16-2010, 03:21 PM
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Citylights, wondering how you're feeling as the day wears on. Hope tomorrow will be a better one for you. I remember those first few days - wanting to skip all the bad stuff and fast forward to feeling human again. Thinking of you.....
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Old 03-16-2010, 05:36 PM
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Thanks Hevyn for asking. The day has definitely gotten better--less shaky and anxious as the alcohol burns off entirely. And got lots of shout outs of support from this site, so glad I found it
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:17 PM
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Old 03-16-2010, 06:38 PM
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Welcome back!!!!
I had 4 years "dry" over two years ago and can vouch that it really is A PROGRESSIVE DISEASE.
Day 13 today and finally 'willing to go to any lengths' to stay sober (BB)

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Old 03-16-2010, 06:55 PM
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Thanks fragrantrose--congrats on your two weeks!
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Old 03-16-2010, 07:53 PM
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You can do this.
I had over 5 years and in July had a small 2 day relapse, but have been sober since.
ODAAT is what it takes. Yes, this disease is absolutely relentless. It hides and lurks in the corner, waiting.
Sober life is better than the drinking one.
No more hangovers, shame, hiding, planning my next drink, DUI's, etc.
Glad U R here.
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