Slowly turning into people I used to hate...
Eating protein and life.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Just. Plain. Grateful.
Posts: 503
Slowly turning into people I used to hate...
...you know the type. Those that have managed to string along a few days of sobriety and gradually notice that life is good, laughter is the best medicine, and sobriety rocks.
I remember coming to this site and being completely envious of those people that found sobriety and happiness because it seemed an impossibility to me.
I "hate" to say it, but I'm becoming one of those people and it's better than what is advertised. It really is.
I remember coming to this site and being completely envious of those people that found sobriety and happiness because it seemed an impossibility to me.
I "hate" to say it, but I'm becoming one of those people and it's better than what is advertised. It really is.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: fragmented
Posts: 84
I see people who have smilies and signatures and avatars and think, how or WHY do they have the will to do such "cutsie" things. How can they be so bursting full of energy to do all THAT? It really sounds crazy to me as I sit in absolute lethargy and depression. But, I hope it is true. I hope to one day join the cutsie crowd myself.
Eating protein and life.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Just. Plain. Grateful.
Posts: 503
I see people who have smilies and signatures and avatars and think, how or WHY do they have the will to do such "cutsie" things. How can they be so bursting full of energy to do all THAT? It really sounds crazy to me as I sit in absolute lethargy and depression. But, I hope it is true. I hope to one day join the cutsie crowd myself.
I hope you feel better, at the beginning I had quite a bit of lethargy and depression days, but not a whole lot since. I dragged my butt to the gym everyday despite feeling like crawling under a rock with a bottle. It seems to be working because I can't remember feeling this alive and happy since my childhood.
Keep your head up soldier!
I was at a meeting a couple of weeks before Christmas, and everyone was talking about how they were looking forward to Christmas because they were sober, simple pleasures, grateful to be alive, completely in touch with the realness of living a real life and so on...they asked me if I wanted to speak and I promptly burst into tears and explained how I was dreading Christmas!
At that point, I was miserable. All I could do was go to work, lie in bed, and go to meetings. I left that meeting feeling so apart from those people on their pink cloud (), but determined to hang in there.
Within a couple of weeks, I was the Mayor of Pink Cloud Town.
It is a strange place for me, but I am loving it! I can't even make a sarcastic joke about it...sarcasm amnesia...:wtf2
...and I'll end this with a smilie (of COURSE!)...nah, I see your puppies cubile, and I'll raise you a kitten...wearing a sweater!
[IMG]http://mfrost.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/knitted_kitteh.jpg[IMG]
At that point, I was miserable. All I could do was go to work, lie in bed, and go to meetings. I left that meeting feeling so apart from those people on their pink cloud (), but determined to hang in there.
Within a couple of weeks, I was the Mayor of Pink Cloud Town.
It is a strange place for me, but I am loving it! I can't even make a sarcastic joke about it...sarcasm amnesia...:wtf2
...and I'll end this with a smilie (of COURSE!)...nah, I see your puppies cubile, and I'll raise you a kitten...wearing a sweater!
[IMG]http://mfrost.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/knitted_kitteh.jpg[IMG]
Well I am old & dumb!!! I have no idea how to post up those cute little pics, but I sure do know how to laugh, cry, look people in the eye and not feel as though I am being judged or looked down upon.
Today I am 90-95% of the time those people I used to despise in meetings, you know, those people who have a twinkle in their eye and a spring in thier step! Those people who laughed easily and for real reasons. Those people who are at peace with the world and comfortable in their own skins!
Oh I will never forget early sobriety, I had a little over 2 months sober, as usual I had gotten to a meeting early and was sitting alon on the side of the room....... I had this funny feeling and I just could not put my finger on it, not a bad feeling, just a feeling I was totally unfamiliar with. Then it dawned on me. I was sitting there not talking to any one, nor listening to anyone, and for no real reason except I was alive and sober........ I was smiling!!!! I was where I needed to be and things were okay.
Today I am 90-95% of the time those people I used to despise in meetings, you know, those people who have a twinkle in their eye and a spring in thier step! Those people who laughed easily and for real reasons. Those people who are at peace with the world and comfortable in their own skins!
Oh I will never forget early sobriety, I had a little over 2 months sober, as usual I had gotten to a meeting early and was sitting alon on the side of the room....... I had this funny feeling and I just could not put my finger on it, not a bad feeling, just a feeling I was totally unfamiliar with. Then it dawned on me. I was sitting there not talking to any one, nor listening to anyone, and for no real reason except I was alive and sober........ I was smiling!!!! I was where I needed to be and things were okay.
Tazman: go to google or any search engine and type in, for example: "puppy pictures". When you find a pic you like, right click on your mouse and you will see a drop down menu that shows among other things: "properties".
Select and copy the entire property text, (it is a web address), then when you come back here to SR, select the picture symbol in the little tool bar: (it's the mountain with the sun symbol).
Once you click on that symbol another little window will open asking you to paste in the property text.
The window will often have the prefix for a web address: delete that and paste in your entire property address.
Select and copy the entire property text, (it is a web address), then when you come back here to SR, select the picture symbol in the little tool bar: (it's the mountain with the sun symbol).
Once you click on that symbol another little window will open asking you to paste in the property text.
The window will often have the prefix for a web address: delete that and paste in your entire property address.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: fragmented
Posts: 84
Ruthless, people! Ruthless!! And yet, paradoxically, inspiring. And to whomever posted my fav dog llasa, I curse and thank you.
But be warned, if i ever feel like you, i may have to break out my children's baby pics as revenge.
But be warned, if i ever feel like you, i may have to break out my children's baby pics as revenge.
Not all better, getting better
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: The Beautiful Inner Banks of NC
Posts: 1,702
I see people who have smilies and signatures and avatars and think, how or WHY do they have the will to do such "cutsie" things. How can they be so bursting full of energy to do all THAT? It really sounds crazy to me as I sit in absolute lethargy and depression. But, I hope it is true. I hope to one day join the cutsie crowd myself.
What a difference a year makes. Don't get me wrong, there are still good days and bad, and the journey was neither easy or pleasant at times. I remember reading all of those posts from folks saying how wonderful sobriety was and thinking, "what a load of BS!!" But 8 months into it, just about every aspect in my life has improved. I really didn't think it would happen that way. I figured I would eventually work my way out of my funk and not think about killing myself daily, but I really didn't think things would imporve so much so fast. Some of it is luck, some of it may be my HP working in my life (though I'm still pretty much on the fence about that whole concept!!), some of it is directly related to my new found sobriety. Overall, I'd say it's a combination of all three.
I'm still not really into all the puppies and cutsie stuff, just my personality I guess. Though who knows, maybe this time next year, I'll be posting cutsie pictures here as well!! You just never know. Take care.
Eating protein and life.
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Just. Plain. Grateful.
Posts: 503
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