Goals for the New Decade

Old 12-29-2009, 02:41 PM
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Not all better, getting better
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Goals for the New Decade

I say goals because, seriously, does anyone ever follow through with "resolutions"?? :-)

Anyway, as the decade draws to a close I've been reflecting upon it. Overall, for me at least, it was pretty ******. Rehab stints, mental hospitals, suicide attempts, divorce, bankruptcy, the lose of pretty much all of my physical possessions, continuing down a path of reckless self-destruction, hurting all of the folks around me how care for me and love me. Ya'll get the idea, I know many of us share similar stories.

It wasn't all bad though. My son was born at the start of the decade, and as it draws to a close, I have almost 8 months of clean time under my belt. It's just that period between the two where things were pretty messed up. I try not to dwell on it much anymore, what's done is done, and all I can do now is try to do better. So these are some of my goals for the next decade, I hope you share your's as well. I may not accomplish all of them, but it won't be because I didn't try.

I will work every day to be a better person than I was the day before. Only looking back for guidence on where I can improve.

I will become a father to my son. Not just a voice on the phone who's name is "Daddy", but a positive influence in his life, in any way possible.

I will work on becoming more patient in all areas of my life, learning that I will not always get my way, and that it is not a bad thing. Accepting circumstances for what they are and understanding that I will not understand everything.

I will work to rebuild my relationship with my wife (now ex) and be thankful for whatever progress I make. I will be content with the results and happy if she can at least see that I am a better man today than I was before.

I will learn from my past mistakes and failures and not allow them to drag me back down again.

I will become a financially responsible, respectable member of society, abe to hold my head high.

I will work to have a positive impact on other's lives. I have taken for far too long, now it is time to give some back.

I will let my actions speak, instead of my words. Words mean nothing without action behind them.

Most importantly, I WILL NOT USE, NO MATTER WHAT. I understand that none of the above will be possible if I do not keep this in mind.

In a perfect world I would accomplish all of these goals to their fullest every single day. We don't live in a perfect world. I understand that I will have my failures along the way, but will not allow them to derail my progress in general. I will work on these goals every day to the best of my ability, be proud of the results and learn from the mistakes.

These are my goals for the new decade.
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Old 12-29-2009, 02:46 PM
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Cant argue with that Tyler, well put. My goal is cleanliness.
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Old 12-29-2009, 02:51 PM
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This is a great post Tyler, very though-provoking. I'm going to keep it short and simple, don't want to set myself up for more than I can handle.

I'm going to work on paying off my debt and getting my finances cleaned up, I'm not comfortable with them and "fear of financial insecurity" has been knocking at my door.

I'm going to clean my garage up so I can efficiently start remodeling our home. I'll need to sell off as much as possible, I've been collecting stuff for too long. The "Today's Gift" email from Hazelden today related exactly to this!

I need to refocus my efforts on diet and exercise. My weight hasn't gone up, but my portion control has gotten away from me, and I liked the way I felt when I was more active.

And as always, I'll stay centered on my recovery, without it the rest isn't possible.
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Old 12-29-2009, 03:57 PM
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Thanks Tyler.

I've been thinking on this too. I remember NYE 1999/ flashes.
The morning after, I seriously wondered if I'd see NYE 2010.

Still a day or two to go but I think I made it LOL.

I'm not a big one for resolutions either, but I have a simple one - balance

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Old 12-29-2009, 04:39 PM
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hmmm, new years eve 1999 I was in the pit of despair, my John had just died and I wanted to go with him.

new years eve last year I was engulfed in shame, I had just "hit my bottom"

I did some pretty tremendous things in between, some pretty horrendous things as well. I wasn't consciously trying for either I don't think, I was just being thrown around by the currents of my life.

This past year has seen me, maybe for the first time in my adult life, take an active roll in deciding what I am doing with my life, and I like it.

So for the next decade (wow that seems big), I will work to do the right thing as often as I possibly can to the best of my ability.

I will work to learn how to help people, in a non-codependent way, and see and accept the times I can't do much at all.

I will work to forgive myself, and to forgive others, and to make things right where I can.

I will embrace every drop of joy that comes my way.

I will work to maintain progress and balance, continuing to work on my spiritual, emotional and physical well being.

I will work to attract healthy relationships with healthy people.

Thats a lot of work, I better get busy!
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