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Old 11-27-2009, 03:26 AM
  # 101 (permalink)  
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hey ame, no more food at the moment for me!

i'm still Belting down the Brioschi
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Old 11-27-2009, 10:35 AM
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Hi WK, I just read your intire thread. I have been on sr for a long time but not so much everyday....
I just wanted to let you know that my prayers will be with you and Edward..
There is a spirit in you that has touched this soul..

Love and hope

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Old 12-06-2009, 07:24 PM
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Thanks Hope, yeah I had seen you were on line sis thats why I had called, we'd been up with Edward sick as a dog, he got it first, food posioning, the mayo had went bad and put us both down under, I am still trying to keep things besides broth down, as for the extras my freezer couldnt hold I sent over to the church I used to work for and told him to help out as many ppl as he could.................we ended up with 23 HAMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mind you we only eat turkey and chicken!!!!! oh well Unk and Amy I need addys............it is time to send out the save the date reminders.......................guess I need to start a web site about the wedding but I am still trying to figure out my damn web site for the store!!!!!


oh well....... I go into the hospital on the 9th with surgery on the 10 they pushed threw my medicade finally..........and thankfully...........now if they will only pass my disablity threw!!

Edward and I are doing well, I havent tried to ask if he is still leaving..............getting tons of mixed signals again and all of them are saying that he is here for the long run.....I love him tell him often.....now he is starting to answer back the same.......................all I had to do was quit taking all of the meds................now if only I can deal with things better in MY head............




Love and Hugs,
Pamm and Edward
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Old 12-12-2009, 09:28 PM
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NOT IN HOSPITAL, HAVE A BACTERIAL INFECTION THAT IS PRETTY BAD AND IT IS NOT CLEARING UP AS EASY AS IT SHOULD DR SAID i HAD ABOUT AN 85% CHANCE OF not GETTING OFF THE SURGERY TABLE SO i WAS IN TOTAL AGREEMENT AND SAID NO SURGERY TILL NEXT MONTH AT LEAST..........AND HERE i WAS HOPEING TO SPEND CHRISTMAS IN THE HOSPITAL.....BUT KINDA GLAD I AM GOING TO BE WITH MY EDWARD FOR CHRISTMAS....BTW REASON HAVENT BEEN ONLINE IS WE MADE UP SORT OF.....AT LEAST WE ARE ACTING LIKE WE ARE IN LOVE AGAIN, i KNOW i STILL AND ALWAYS WILL BE BUT MY FRIEND IS BACK SO THAT MAKES IT SO MUCH BETTER!
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Old 12-13-2009, 02:13 AM
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(((Pamm))) I'm glad things are back to "good" between you and Edward. You guys are always in my prayers.

Sorry about the bacterial infection, but I agree...definitely no surgery with THAT going on!!! So glad your medicaid was approved, crossing fingers and toes for the disability. It took my stepsister FOREVER to get it, even with only 20% of her heart functioning and fibro, but she got a nice settlement to start with.

My lawsuit is still in limbo...workmen's comp is still basically denying that I have PTSD..duh, that's why I'm SUING them!!! I'm not pushing it, though, as once it is settled, I have to quit and don't have another job, and I DO have good insurance, though it doesn't cover the anti-d I need. Every time I run out of samples, I become a straight dingbat! Can't remember ****!

Brit and her best friend had a falling out, and Brit has had a remarkable change in personality...no tantrums, no screaming...it's like she has matured before my very eyes! This has made everyone in the house much calmer and we are all getting along SOOOO much better. Can't actually remember the last time I had a bad day.

Still having money issues...basically broke, but I FINALLY "turned it over" and wow, it really does work! Still putting in applications, working on school, and doing both jobs, but haven't been stressed in weeks. I know this won't last forever, but I'm hanging on to this good feeling for dear life!!

One thing about us, (((Pamm))) - we may go through some pretty darned tough times, but we DO get through them, and we just get stronger and stronger!! We are survivors!

Love, hugs and prayers!

Amy
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Old 12-13-2009, 03:33 AM
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ame[QUOTE]but we DO get through them, and we just get stronger and stronger!! We are survivors![QUOTE]

and ame, as i keep telling katzy,

you can share to to others on that!

hope!

Happy Holidays
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Old 12-13-2009, 06:57 AM
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Thanks, ((Rusty)) - I try to pass it on...it was hearing others' stories of survival, and friends like you and ((Pamm) and others, that GOT me to this point!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy
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Old 12-13-2009, 07:30 PM
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welcome ame!

and thanks for the kind words,

they mean loads!

xxooxxoo
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Old 12-22-2009, 09:24 PM
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I am trying thats for damn sure.....................so ready to start doing illegal sh it to get some money coming in around here this is some ********, but I am holding on tight I sware I am........as for Edward and I same as always still madly in love, he actually bought me something for christmas I creid like a baby, he said the only reason I bought it is because I knew you wouldnt get it for yourself and it is really something you can use, it is a round oblong circular vibrating pillow that fits perfectly in the lower part of my back.......I fellasleep like a baby last night with it woke up to him leaning over me just cheesing from ear to ear asking how I slept.......told him like a baby, I didnt keep getting up and down all night.....Happy Christmas and New Years you two, I will call soon.......just havent been feeling the mood, even though the dogs have their raindeer antlers for p ictures.......have been trying to deal with stuff going on around here, we had a mental health walk away open up my fence and try to "PET" my puppies.......thank God I ran track as it was he got scratched up a bit, just a few seconds longer and Quizzey would of had his neck......it was scarrey as hell and they tried to have my dogs put down, the day center was in the wrong not me or my animals.....they opened up the place without even contacting the community.....if they had they would of known I wasnt the only vicious pit owners in the area, so now they are trying to get our dogs put down and saying they are illegal and we fight them.....the police as well as my bosses with Animal control and hundreds of our neighbors as well as judges and other police and people who know us have stepped up and the judges just laughed them out of court......told them that we have done everything that we have had to do legally the 8 foot high fences the postings of vicious animals ect.....so all is starting to calm down a bit........although she swares that she is going to shot my dogs......I raised the awareness in court that if it did take place I would be shooting back and the judge said that would be your right to protect you and your family, I understand that you are raising these animals as your children and I would do the same.....that was so cool........I love people who get the fact that just because an animal protects their property and owners doesnt mean we are fighting them........as for the health crap.....trying to get better, Dr Bowling said I would have my surgery in the middle of January some time, I am too busy worrying about my momma she has blood clots in her legs and as I told everyone she is first with me!

Unk tell Nan I am sorry I havent called lately, SHE IS SO F'IN AWSOME!!!!! I loved talking to her!!!!!! But I am off of this thing and back off to bed, Edward woke me up to feed me and I am really tired.......so Happy Holidays and I love yas!


Love,
Pamm and Edward
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Old 12-23-2009, 03:50 AM
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thanks for the update katzy,

i'm glad to hear that vibrator thingy was a pillow!

will pass the message to nan,

and you two have the Merriest Christmas you can.

love and blessings

unk
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Old 12-24-2009, 02:23 AM
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(((Pamm)))

Warning - long - it's been a long week/day.

I could have sworn I posted here last night, but it must have been another post where it went to "database error".

Glad to hear you and Edward are hangin' in there, and that the judge validates those of us who have 4-legged furry babies!!

I've had a rough week. Brit wanted to go to Macon, where I used at, as the mall down there was supposed to have a Hollister's store where she wanted to shop. I did go by the 'hood, only to try to find a phone number for one of my boys, who has been very supportive of me and I only keep in touch by phone - just don't have his latest number.

Didn't find him or get his number, but did find out my XABF died earlier this month...the guy I talked to (who didn't even recognize me, so I guess that's a good thing, huh?) said he heard that S either od'd or bled internally. I hadn't seen him since his mama's funeral, but had written to him during a couple stints in jail, in the last few months, in fact. Basically told him how good I was doing, hoping I'd spark an interest in him getting his life together (guess THAT didn't work). I did tell him, that though we would never be together, I did love him, so that gives me some comfort. Still, it hurts and am going through the grieving process.

I did show Brit all the "houses" I'd stayed in, which are rundown dumps and she got a real life lesson on where drugs can take you. She just answered with a very subdued "wow". The stupid Hollister's was closed, and I ended up taking her back up to the north side of Atlanta to another mall, but ended up with a VERY happy 16-year-old

Then Thu., was taking off my left shoe, pulling the heel off with the toe of my right shoe - heard and felt a very loud "pop" and had some pretty bad pain. Couldn't get hold of my dr., nor get into see him until Mon. Made a trip, BACK to Macon, for dad (no stops in the 'hood this time) then tried to work, but only made it 4 hours, called in sick on Sat. Worked Sun. and we were slammed, so by the time I saw my doc on Mon., I was hurting pretty bad.

Possibly have a torn ligament....great. I did some research and it looks like I have "hip overuse syndrome", most often associated with athletes, but can also apply to someone, like me, who has been working on their feet for 28 of the 32 years I've been working. My xrays that my doc did a few months ago back it up. May not be able to do this job much longer.

Spent today Christmas shopping and stepmom is on my "list". She wants a jewelry box..dad is actually getting it for her, but I was going to find it as he has no taste. She had me running all over, bum hip and all, having to park way far away from the stores, in horrible traffic with tons of people. Never DID find the damned jewelry box. Said a few things that set me off and I snapped and told her she'd been entirely inappropriate.

She's been coming in my room for the past 2 nights, "Amy....." with one thing or another, then comes back 5 minutes later. Me thinks she's taking too many xanax. She's thrown away her neurontin and wants to borrow mine, and pay me back when she gets her refill...told her no way am I "loaning" her 20+ pills..she needs to call her dr.

And, I just went through the den to get my sheets out of the dryer and she's asleep with a cigarette in her hand (my biggest fear is that she's going to burn our house down". She says she wasn't asleep (NOT) and that it's one of those fireless cigarettes and it had gone out, so that makes it all okay. I snapped again, saying it might NOT have been one of those, and I'll be damned if I'm going to lose my home and my life because she can't go to bed when she's tired. We'd JUST had a conversation where I told her I was tired of her telling me she wasn't asleep, yet she was slumped over in an obviously uncomfortable position and she admitted I was right. I'm going to start taking pictures.

I'm hoping a good night's sleep will make me feel better. Monday I went to Birmingham fordad, and ended up being awake for 38 hourson only 3 hours of sleep. I talked to stepmom for the last hour, just to stay awake.

My plan for today was get Brit, dad and stepmom's presents then come home and clean my room..no problem. With her obsession with thejewelry box, it ended up being a 6-hour shopping trip and I JUST finished cleaning my room at 2:30a.m. I am going to sleep until I wake up.

On a GOOD note, we are going back over to stepsister's for dinner tomorrow night, which means I get to play with Abby (8), Joey (4) and Cinnamon,the boxer. Abby and Joey could care less if you bring them presents...they're just excied to see me, though I do have a little something for both of them. I've misplaced my camera, so am hoping to find it tomorrow.

After a week and a day like today, SURELY tomorrow will be better! I'm also going to Christmas eve candlelght service at church Stepmom had mentioned that she would liketo go, and maybe Brit would go, too. Dad said he would also go. The past 3 years, they have set and watched me go by myself. If it happens again this year, I'll be okay - I meet my mom-Kay and her husband, Dan there, and they love me dearly, and never fail to tell me how proud they are of me

Okay, sleeping meds are kicking in, and I'm sure there are a bunch or typos in this, but get over it!

((Pamm)) and ((Rusty))) - have an awesome Christmas and remember..it's not about the presents...it's about being grateful we're alive and spending time with the people we love. I just have to think about where I was about 4 years ago...in a motel room with S, smoking the heck out of some crack, only venturing outside when I needed to "make more money for more crack"...even today, as frustrating as it was, was a whole lot better than that!

((Pamm)) you and Edward give each other hugs for me....((Rusty)) - same goes for you and ((Nan)). I am truly blessed for the friends I have met here.

Love, hugs and praeyrs!

Amy
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Old 12-24-2009, 03:16 AM
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Not all the way caught up with you Pamm... it's almost impossible! Sending hugs and prayers out to both of you. Thinking of you ~ xoxox

Merry Christmas and here's to a healthier New Year for you !
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Old 12-24-2009, 03:17 AM
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Hi Amy ! It's been a while since I've been caught up with you too. Same good wishes to you and your family .
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Old 12-24-2009, 03:42 AM
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Merry Christmas
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Old 12-30-2009, 09:29 PM
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thanks all.....................so much going on but doing well.....................smilin despite it all......Love Hugs Support and kisses to you all just a few short hours it will be 2010 and though spaceships we will not be driving around in as of yet I do believe we WILL have a better year than last!

Edward said hello and Best of wishes to all

Love Pamm and Edward



ps to all of my family and friends reading this MY REAL FATHER ISNT DEAD BUT MY COURT ORDERED SERROGATE FATHER/GOD FATHER/VERY CLOSE FRIEND IS DEAD IF I LEAD YOU TO BELIEVE OTHER WISE YOU SHOULD OF ASKED RATHER THAN ASSUMED.......and I will still go on posting here and at Rats only because it is what keeps me safe sane and clean! I love you all!
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Old 12-30-2009, 10:13 PM
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Originally Posted by WLDKATZ View Post
MY REAL FATHER ISNT DEAD BUT MY COURT ORDERED SERROGATE FATHER/GOD FATHER/VERY CLOSE FRIEND IS DEAD IF I LEAD YOU TO BELIEVE OTHER WISE YOU SHOULD OF ASKED RATHER THAN ASSUMED.
Why am I suddenly thinking of Darth Vader and Luke? LOL!(kidding, kidding)

I think Pamm it's not our responsibility to know if you mean your real father/surrogate father/GodFather, whoever if you don't make it clear to us-so it's only natural people could assume you weren't telling the truth.But regardless-I'm glad you're clean and hope you have a good New Years!
Jules!
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Old 12-31-2009, 04:21 AM
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thanks for the update katzt girl,

wishing you and Eduardo all the best in the new year to come.
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Old 12-31-2009, 05:20 AM
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Pamm, I don't post much on your thread, but I do follow the updates and keep prayers and good thoughts 'winging' their way to you and Edward in MI.

I hope that 2010 will bring you and Edward some peace and serenity as you are both overdue, BIG TIME!!!!!!!

Keep moving forward sweetie. Your posts are showing others that no matter what the 'strife' or 'stress' is at the moment, no matter how bad, we can get through it without falling back to our 'old' ways. We may do this fighting, kicking, and screaming but it can be done.

Thank you for keeping us updated.

Love and hugs,
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Old 12-31-2009, 10:43 AM
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(((Pamm))) - I'm so sorry to hear about your Godfather...I know how much you loved him.

I'm about to head out to work (what's new?). Sending you and Edward a ton of love and hugs!!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy
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