stone

Another day. One thing I learned in AA was One Day At a Time, this doesn't only apply to not drinking it applies to life and can be taken to further to the extreme of living in the present moment, mindfulness.
Mindfulness isn't easy but is a wonderful way to exist when you can do it.

Today I am going to keep everything "in the day", the past is gone and the future is just a mind projection that causes worry.

I have something my ex-sponsor gave me that I will right down here for me and others to read....

Yesterday, today and tomorrow.

There are two days in every week about which we should not worry, two days which should be kept from fear and apprehension.

One of those days is YESTERDAY, with it's mistakes, it's faults and blunders, it's aches and pains. YESTERDAY has passed forever beyond our control.

All the money in the world cannot bring back YESTERDAY. We cannot undo a single act we perforemed; we cannot erase a word we said. YESTERDAY is gone!

THe other day we should not worry about is TOMORROW, with it's possible adversities, it's burdens, it's large promise and poor performance.

TOMORROW'S sun will rise, either in splendour or behind a mask of clouds-but it will rise. Until it does we have no stake in TOMORROW, for it is still unborn.

This leaves only one day - TODAY. Anyone can fight the battle for just one day. It is only when you add the burdens of those two awful entities, YESTERDAY and TOMORROW, that we break down.

It is not the experience of TODAY that drives us mad, it is remorse and bitterness for something which happened YESTERDAY and the dread of what TOMORROW might bring.

Let us therefore live but one day at a time.

stone

That was a lot of typing!

Same plan today as yesterday, keep busy. Gonna wash some clothes and I have some life stuff to deal with too.

I will try to stay in the moment.

Rodchenko

Hey Stone, thanks so much for posting this - it's both reassuring and a little scary how much your experience reflects the way I would drink & the excuses I would make to keep doing it.

Throughout my 20s, I would binge for a few days and recover sometimes for as much as 3 months, sometimes over a year - until I finally thought I had it "beat" at age 32 after more than 3 years of sobriety.

Upon moving to a new city, I decided to go out for a beer to prove how normal I was now.

Woke up terrified and hollowed out in a hotel after drinking for nearly 10 days straight. For the first time, I was terrified of how my body felt, thinking I might have done permanent damage.

I've only got two days behind me now (which is why I'm here) but I'm trying to understand how I could go without a drink for 3 years (or even wanting one) and then suddenly a binge so fast and far worse than anything I'd done before...

Well, I'm asking the same question: what will I do different this time? AA? A sponsor? Coming to this site is a good first move for me because I've never even talked about my problem -- and reading your post really helped me feel less alone in this. Thanks.

stone

Hi Rodchenko and welcome to SR.

I am really happy if my post helped you, it does help to realise we aren't alone in this.

parentrecovers

keep up the good work, stone!

scaredykat

Stoney big hug for ya. :ghug3

I am so proud of you for writing a daily serious thread. Remember mine that I did a year or more ago on SR? I truly believe writing helps a lot.

I love what you have wrote so far. It helps keep it green for me too remembering all the pain i went through when I last drank. I still remember my last drunk and have it all wrote down on SR. It was called "My last relapse" I think it's on SR yet somewhere on here.

So true what you wrote here. I'm also keeping it "in the day" with all my heath problems lately. It really does work.

You've had a lot of great advice on here. Keep busy, whether it's your Wii or taking pictures. Whatever. Busy body and mind will help keep you sober one day at a time.

Good luck and well wishes with your recovery this time. I know you can do it. You have a great start so far. Keep up the good work. I look forward to reading your thread.

Much love,
Barb

stone

Thanks K.

Hi Barb and thanks, nice to see you here on my serial thread.

PaperDolls

I'm here too Stone.

stone

Hi Jen!

IO Storm

Serial Sher..checking in..

jowinbo

:ghug

nelco

Im just back from a meeting stone, survived another St. Patricks day, well should say I enjoyed another St. Patricks day.....I survived them for years, and god knows how. Good to see your already giving back and helping others like.. Rodchenko


Hi Rodchenko .... nice to meet you, keep posting here, its great support.

stone

Hi serial Sher. Jowinbo and Nelco.

I have felt weird and depressed all day today, I did the life stuff that needed doing and went to bed for the rest of the time. I am still only 7 days off the last binge so it is to be expected that I will feel weird, I was still surprised by it's severity though.

Nearly midnight here, I am gonna Wii and then eat.

gypsytears

Feeling weird will pass.

Wii-ing and eating is a good idea.

stone

I feel better after eating. Hopefully tomorrow I will feel more normal.

nelco

We are up late stone, I hope you sleep well.

stone

You too Nelco.

jowinbo

i wish you well, my friend!!!!!! feeling weird is ok, AT least YOU are feeling!

just don't pick up next drink! and stay away from people, places and things that are slippery to you!

you WILL make it! i have faith in you!
one day at a time!

love in sobreity!

:ghug

nelco

morning Stone......a whole new day awaits.....give it your best shot!! hey, the weather not bad either for this time of year. Chat ya later.

stone

Hey Jow. Thanks.

Morning Nelco, it is bright and sunny here too right now, I had a good sleep eventually. Feeling a bit dazed, prolly a bit too much sleep, lol.

Feeling OK though, gonna try and eat more healthy today. I will pick something up when I go to the Post Office, not from the Post Office but from the shops nearby.

Yes, very dazed brain today.