Class of August 2018 Part 11
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Class of August 2018 Part 11
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Shotgun! . . . . as I've heard a first post called on a new thread called.
Ugh . . . woke up remembering that I was supposed to go to a graduation yesterday and forgot. I hate that I do this. I need to start a new habit of looking at my calendar every day . . . and work on money . . . ugh.
Interesting dreams last night.
May this weekend be off to a good start for you all.
Ugh . . . woke up remembering that I was supposed to go to a graduation yesterday and forgot. I hate that I do this. I need to start a new habit of looking at my calendar every day . . . and work on money . . . ugh.
Interesting dreams last night.
May this weekend be off to a good start for you all.
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Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 341
Thank you Dee! I'm calling dibs on the first post spot in this thread. Wish Kitty or Barbs would have gotten it first, though.
Ayers, I'm laughing at the 6-9 club. I so would have been a part of that group -- more likely the 6-8 club if I was feeling perky and could stay awake that long. I am in bed so early these days, but I don't feel bad. I love to sleep, and sleep is soo much better than it was in my 'pass out by nine, wake up with insomnia at 11, ruminate over all the drunken bs I did until 5, finally haul my hungover tush out of the bed, sweaty and shaky by noon if it's a good day' days.
Just checking in quickly to say hi Bee, Dee, Barbs, Bonnie, Ayers, Kitty, Zoey -- everybody!
I'm off to meet my Harley group to go for a long ride on the back of a 1000+ pound bike with my one-eyed boyfriend because I make excellent life choices like that. Lol!
Thanks for the sympathy on my Fiance's eye shot situation. He's pretty tough, but I don't know how he does it. He says, "awww. tell them thank you for the thoughts! better me than them!" Guess you never know what you can do until you have to.
Bee, I'm thinking a little Harley would be just the thing for you! Maybe a cute little softtail. It would pep you up and give you an outlet for your wanderlust. I could so see you riding! Well, I guess I can't see "you, " but I can see your personality riding. Haha. You should find out where your local -- or closest --Harley dealership is and sign up for a learn to ride class. I'm serious!!
I hate to have to close with this, but I am truly worried about Kitty. (Barbs, I'm thinking you're ok and just taking a break). If you've had a bad slip, Kitty, I hope you're in a nice safe detox facility getting the care you need. Ugh. I just feel that something must have gone awry, or you'd be here with us, Kitty. And going through an "up" phase then having a crash is something you've done before. I just wish you the best whatever is happening. Sending prayers.
Another person who I wonder about is Red. Has anyone heard anything from her?
Ayers, I'm laughing at the 6-9 club. I so would have been a part of that group -- more likely the 6-8 club if I was feeling perky and could stay awake that long. I am in bed so early these days, but I don't feel bad. I love to sleep, and sleep is soo much better than it was in my 'pass out by nine, wake up with insomnia at 11, ruminate over all the drunken bs I did until 5, finally haul my hungover tush out of the bed, sweaty and shaky by noon if it's a good day' days.
Just checking in quickly to say hi Bee, Dee, Barbs, Bonnie, Ayers, Kitty, Zoey -- everybody!
I'm off to meet my Harley group to go for a long ride on the back of a 1000+ pound bike with my one-eyed boyfriend because I make excellent life choices like that. Lol!
Thanks for the sympathy on my Fiance's eye shot situation. He's pretty tough, but I don't know how he does it. He says, "awww. tell them thank you for the thoughts! better me than them!" Guess you never know what you can do until you have to.
Bee, I'm thinking a little Harley would be just the thing for you! Maybe a cute little softtail. It would pep you up and give you an outlet for your wanderlust. I could so see you riding! Well, I guess I can't see "you, " but I can see your personality riding. Haha. You should find out where your local -- or closest --Harley dealership is and sign up for a learn to ride class. I'm serious!!
I hate to have to close with this, but I am truly worried about Kitty. (Barbs, I'm thinking you're ok and just taking a break). If you've had a bad slip, Kitty, I hope you're in a nice safe detox facility getting the care you need. Ugh. I just feel that something must have gone awry, or you'd be here with us, Kitty. And going through an "up" phase then having a crash is something you've done before. I just wish you the best whatever is happening. Sending prayers.
Another person who I wonder about is Red. Has anyone heard anything from her?
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Join Date: Aug 2018
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Awww Alice and Bee you BOTH beat me.
Next time, I'll be first. How many posts before a new page??
Alice, I agree with you, also worried about our Kitty. Really. And missing Barbs. I haven't seen anything from Red for a long time - also thought of her the other day. Tried searching for her in a few classes , but failed.
Miss all our classmates who have disappeared or "resigned" from our class. We used to be such a bunch at one stage.
Off to curl up in bed now with my book.
Goodnight , hugs XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Next time, I'll be first. How many posts before a new page??
Alice, I agree with you, also worried about our Kitty. Really. And missing Barbs. I haven't seen anything from Red for a long time - also thought of her the other day. Tried searching for her in a few classes , but failed.
Miss all our classmates who have disappeared or "resigned" from our class. We used to be such a bunch at one stage.
Off to curl up in bed now with my book.
Goodnight , hugs XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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Location: Western US
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Originally Posted by Aliceiw 
Bee, I'm thinking a little Harley would be just the thing for you! Maybe a cute little softtail. It would pep you up and give you an outlet for your wanderlust. I could so see you riding! Well, I guess I can't see "you, " but I can see your personality riding. Haha. You should find out where your local -- or closest --Harley dealership is and sign up for a learn to ride class. I'm serious!!
I'm having a bit of a day here . . ugh . . depression hit today. Sometimes it happens. Most often when I have too much alone time. I did get out and have some borrowed dogs which helps.
Love to hear from Kitty too. Kitty where ever you are or whatever state you are in, we love you!!!!
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Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 341
Sorry you're feeling blue, Bekind. It really never ceases to amaze me how much we can get dragged around and influenced by something as ephemeral as moods. It makes me want to set an intellectual life plan and just stick to it no matter what. Well, I guess that's all what we're doing here, really. Yes of course I meant it as a compliment that you'd make a good motorcycle rider! Our group has all kinds of different people. nobody fits the stereotype. Our road captain today was a college professor and our wing was an architect. All we all share in common is an enthusiasm for the freedom that riding brings.
It was a great day today. The ride was beautiful and lunch was good. Sitting out back enjoying the beautiful breezy weather tonight I had the feeling that I'd really enjoy a glass of something. Those feelings do come up frequently, but I'm able to push them away now and just enjoy the great feeling of being sober.
Goodnight all.
It was a great day today. The ride was beautiful and lunch was good. Sitting out back enjoying the beautiful breezy weather tonight I had the feeling that I'd really enjoy a glass of something. Those feelings do come up frequently, but I'm able to push them away now and just enjoy the great feeling of being sober.
Goodnight all.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
Posts: 9,009
Thanks Alice and Dee. Good friends arrived tonight who I haven't seen in 6 months and it chirked me right up.
Alice I read somewhere about a group of women bikers who transport breast milk between Moms and milk banks. I thought it was the coolest. I have a quixotic streak so this appeals to me.
Alice I read somewhere about a group of women bikers who transport breast milk between Moms and milk banks. I thought it was the coolest. I have a quixotic streak so this appeals to me.
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Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 1,288
Sunday morning
Bee, hope you're feeling better after your friends' arrival. I suppose these ups and downs in moods is all part and parcel - but I too hate it when it happens.
Alice, here in SA we have a group of women who ride - for awareness of breast cancer. I have three friends - who didn't know one another - who are now part of that group. Also on Harley's.
Your day out sounds lovely! Glad you had a good time.
Dee, we are working on reaching 490 -500 posts on this page
Have a good Sunday XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Bee, hope you're feeling better after your friends' arrival. I suppose these ups and downs in moods is all part and parcel - but I too hate it when it happens.
Alice, here in SA we have a group of women who ride - for awareness of breast cancer. I have three friends - who didn't know one another - who are now part of that group. Also on Harley's.
Your day out sounds lovely! Glad you had a good time.
Dee, we are working on reaching 490 -500 posts on this page
Have a good Sunday XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: England
Posts: 615
Morning Everyone,
Feel so embarrassed coming back with the same ******** explanation as to whats happened, again! I can't remember when I last checked in but I had a fantastic Birthday with my bf and parents and managed to stay sober but I started drinking that weekend and carried on until yesterday. I haven't drank anywhere near as much as precious binges but still drank daily. I'm not using it as an excuse but what happened was we got a call from my bf's family saying they've found a second tumor on his mums brain and its bleeding, they prepared us all to loose her that night so you can imagine we were just feeling numb, shock and so on.... Anyway we then got more messages explaining his brother hadn't put it across to us right and it wouldn't be that night but that she has gone home to pass and it can be anytime now... We started drinking that night and that was it, he manages to still function though and stop the next day whereas I start with awful fear and anxiety and convince myself if I don't go and get a few drinks to get me though the day that I'll fall apart with dangerous withdrawals and poss go to hospital so I just steadily continue drinking. I hate it and feel so ashamed! I just want to remain open and honest on here with you all.
During this last two weeks I've missed 3 work shifts, my work from home really suffered again and I haven't been to any yoga classes or the food festival we had planned this weekend with friends. I'm sat here ok now, not making light of it one bit but it definitely is a lot less destructive than previous times but I know that doesn't make it ok and I know that I could've another relapse and it could be Fatal theres no safety or security in my drinking but I'm just glad I'm sat here well enough and able to explain this and not much worse like times before.
It's 10:35am here now, I'm due in the restaurant at 5pm, I'm so anxious, shaky, dizzy etc so I really don't know if I'll make it, If I can't make it today I'll have to accept I've ran before I can walk and its too much too soon for me and let the job go, I feel awful letting the team down there when I know they're so busy.
Currently just sat quietly drinking a herbal matcha green tea.
My bf didn't start the factory Job I mentioned as the shifts weren't realistic for him to get to and from with where we live and with no transport and so on so he started labouring for a local firm instead, so at least he's working full time now.
I'm so sorry again to of gone AWOL again and worried you. You're a family to me on here so I do feel awful but I won't come on and check in whilst still drinking so I have to wait until I'm fully sober again. So back to day 1 again for me...
I do hope me having the relapses isn't hindering anyones recovery here, please do be honest with me if it was, I'd hate to leave this group but I would do if that was the case.
I have some reading and catching up to do so I'm going to do that now with my cup of tea. My Mum Called in yesterday, we had a nice few hours together, she was with me whilst drinking but understands that was me trying to wean back down carefully, we walked to the herbalist shop together and I spoke with the lady there who helps me and she gave me some flower essence remedy to drop on my tongue, there's many different ones but this one is called "obsession" she thought it could help with the addiction / obsession with alcohol. Who knows, can't do me any harm anyway.
So so glad to be back here with you all and missed it so much, I miss sitting here fresh headed with a cuppa and reading of your life journeys and sharing mine with you.
Right, time to read back and see how you're all doing xxxxxx
Lots of Love as Always xxxxxx
Feel so embarrassed coming back with the same ******** explanation as to whats happened, again! I can't remember when I last checked in but I had a fantastic Birthday with my bf and parents and managed to stay sober but I started drinking that weekend and carried on until yesterday. I haven't drank anywhere near as much as precious binges but still drank daily. I'm not using it as an excuse but what happened was we got a call from my bf's family saying they've found a second tumor on his mums brain and its bleeding, they prepared us all to loose her that night so you can imagine we were just feeling numb, shock and so on.... Anyway we then got more messages explaining his brother hadn't put it across to us right and it wouldn't be that night but that she has gone home to pass and it can be anytime now... We started drinking that night and that was it, he manages to still function though and stop the next day whereas I start with awful fear and anxiety and convince myself if I don't go and get a few drinks to get me though the day that I'll fall apart with dangerous withdrawals and poss go to hospital so I just steadily continue drinking. I hate it and feel so ashamed! I just want to remain open and honest on here with you all.
During this last two weeks I've missed 3 work shifts, my work from home really suffered again and I haven't been to any yoga classes or the food festival we had planned this weekend with friends. I'm sat here ok now, not making light of it one bit but it definitely is a lot less destructive than previous times but I know that doesn't make it ok and I know that I could've another relapse and it could be Fatal theres no safety or security in my drinking but I'm just glad I'm sat here well enough and able to explain this and not much worse like times before.
It's 10:35am here now, I'm due in the restaurant at 5pm, I'm so anxious, shaky, dizzy etc so I really don't know if I'll make it, If I can't make it today I'll have to accept I've ran before I can walk and its too much too soon for me and let the job go, I feel awful letting the team down there when I know they're so busy.
Currently just sat quietly drinking a herbal matcha green tea.
My bf didn't start the factory Job I mentioned as the shifts weren't realistic for him to get to and from with where we live and with no transport and so on so he started labouring for a local firm instead, so at least he's working full time now.
I'm so sorry again to of gone AWOL again and worried you. You're a family to me on here so I do feel awful but I won't come on and check in whilst still drinking so I have to wait until I'm fully sober again. So back to day 1 again for me...
I do hope me having the relapses isn't hindering anyones recovery here, please do be honest with me if it was, I'd hate to leave this group but I would do if that was the case.
I have some reading and catching up to do so I'm going to do that now with my cup of tea. My Mum Called in yesterday, we had a nice few hours together, she was with me whilst drinking but understands that was me trying to wean back down carefully, we walked to the herbalist shop together and I spoke with the lady there who helps me and she gave me some flower essence remedy to drop on my tongue, there's many different ones but this one is called "obsession" she thought it could help with the addiction / obsession with alcohol. Who knows, can't do me any harm anyway.
So so glad to be back here with you all and missed it so much, I miss sitting here fresh headed with a cuppa and reading of your life journeys and sharing mine with you.
Right, time to read back and see how you're all doing xxxxxx
Lots of Love as Always xxxxxx
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 451
Kitty, you are so welcome back here! We love hearing from you, no matter what. We've all had our 'back to Day 1' posts. I believe every sober day, even when you slip, makes you a little bit stronger. I wish you strong commitment, good plans to get you through tough times, a quiet mind, and knowing you have this team and I'm sure many others cheering you on.
I had my first drinking dream the other night. Some of you have mentioned them, but I never had one! I had gotten plastered and couldn't remember the night before, but my husband was really ashamed of me. I kept insisting I'd go to rehab. I was SO happy to wake up sober. The awfulness stayed with me, which was a good and inspiring thing!
I really want to make it this time. It's so hard. But so worth it. If I could just capture the wonderful feeling of waking up sober -- like this morning -- and make myself feel it the night before when the wine witch is howling … But I'm hanging in there with you so far! Each day is a huge victory.
Good morning, Ayers, BeKind, Dee, Kitty, Alice, and all of us Augustonians.
I had my first drinking dream the other night. Some of you have mentioned them, but I never had one! I had gotten plastered and couldn't remember the night before, but my husband was really ashamed of me. I kept insisting I'd go to rehab. I was SO happy to wake up sober. The awfulness stayed with me, which was a good and inspiring thing!
I really want to make it this time. It's so hard. But so worth it. If I could just capture the wonderful feeling of waking up sober -- like this morning -- and make myself feel it the night before when the wine witch is howling … But I'm hanging in there with you so far! Each day is a huge victory.
Good morning, Ayers, BeKind, Dee, Kitty, Alice, and all of us Augustonians.
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Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 451
P.S. Kitty, I don't know if it will help, but I have found reading quit-lit really supportive. The Sober Diaries hit home with me, and helped! The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober was also really helpful. Alcohol Explained was also practical (although I skimmed over parts that just didn't resonate). This might not be what you need, but it was important to me in my initial days.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Western US
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Oh oh oh Kitty, so glad you are back. As sad as I am for your relapse, the courage of your returns always help me stay my own course.
Keep drinking that tea and coming up with more ways to strengthen yourself.
Keep drinking that tea and coming up with more ways to strengthen yourself.
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Join Date: Aug 2018
Location: Texas
Posts: 341
Hi, Kitty. Whew. I'm so glad you're back! I second everything Zoey said so well.
(BTW, Zoey, I'm wondering if Zoey is your real name or your dog's name. I was gonna name my daughter Zoey, but some neighbors of mine had a dog named chloe and I just thought it was too similar. Yes, I'm weird like that.)
Kitty, I hesitate to ask, but I have to ask you something: If your boyfriend drinks with you knowing what he knows about your alcohol allergy, are you entirely sure he's good for you? If I were him I would be scared to death and would try to keep you away from alcohol and busy with healthy things. Certainly wouldn't be drinking with you. I ask because my first husband was a drinker. I was with him for 30 years and never could have gotten sober without leaving him. Oh, yes -- he said he didn't want me to drink, said he wanted to help me, but his own drinking, his bringing alcohol into the house all the time and his wanting me to drink so I'd let my guard down at certain times ...ahem ...were going to be the death of me. I'm so glad my current doesn't drink! He's been such an amazing support.
Well, not much going on with me today. Going to the gyjm this morning , then maybe out for coffee. I just love those caramel cloud macchiatos! Tommorow the 5th wedding dress I ordred will come along with the leather Harley vest I'm going to wear with it. (Did I mention that we found a cake topper with a couple riding on a Harley that looks just like us?) Wish I could be part of a breast milk bikers group. How cool! My club does some service things, but I haven't gotten involved yet. I'm not a rider, though, just what they call a passenger.
Good day all,
(BTW, Zoey, I'm wondering if Zoey is your real name or your dog's name. I was gonna name my daughter Zoey, but some neighbors of mine had a dog named chloe and I just thought it was too similar. Yes, I'm weird like that.)
Kitty, I hesitate to ask, but I have to ask you something: If your boyfriend drinks with you knowing what he knows about your alcohol allergy, are you entirely sure he's good for you? If I were him I would be scared to death and would try to keep you away from alcohol and busy with healthy things. Certainly wouldn't be drinking with you. I ask because my first husband was a drinker. I was with him for 30 years and never could have gotten sober without leaving him. Oh, yes -- he said he didn't want me to drink, said he wanted to help me, but his own drinking, his bringing alcohol into the house all the time and his wanting me to drink so I'd let my guard down at certain times ...ahem ...were going to be the death of me. I'm so glad my current doesn't drink! He's been such an amazing support.
Well, not much going on with me today. Going to the gyjm this morning , then maybe out for coffee. I just love those caramel cloud macchiatos! Tommorow the 5th wedding dress I ordred will come along with the leather Harley vest I'm going to wear with it. (Did I mention that we found a cake topper with a couple riding on a Harley that looks just like us?) Wish I could be part of a breast milk bikers group. How cool! My club does some service things, but I haven't gotten involved yet. I'm not a rider, though, just what they call a passenger.
Good day all,
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Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 2,279
Nawww guys, I am here but not sober, was thinking about making today day 1.
I have been smoking at night every night, which increases my drinking and makes me sooo demotivated not to be living life, as it just becomes about sneaking in the ciggies and the drink so that the kids don't know and that's how my evenings are spent now and I really can't be bothered with all the energy I spend doing this..
Both addictions are taking their toll..
I often pop in here to see who is still around and I always watch for JT in the hopes he will let someone know how he is too..
Thank you for thinking of me..
I have been smoking at night every night, which increases my drinking and makes me sooo demotivated not to be living life, as it just becomes about sneaking in the ciggies and the drink so that the kids don't know and that's how my evenings are spent now and I really can't be bothered with all the energy I spend doing this..
Both addictions are taking their toll..
I often pop in here to see who is still around and I always watch for JT in the hopes he will let someone know how he is too..
Thank you for thinking of me..
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 2,279
Nawww guys, I am here but not sober, was thinking about making today day 1.
I have been smoking at night every night, which increases my drinking and makes me sooo demotivated not to be living life, as it just becomes about sneaking in the ciggies and the drink so that the kids don't know and that's how my evenings are spent now and I really can't be bothered with all the energy I spend doing this..
Both addictions are taking their toll..
I often pop in here to see who is still around and I always watch for JT in the hopes he will let someone know how he is too..
Thank you for thinking of me..
I have been smoking at night every night, which increases my drinking and makes me sooo demotivated not to be living life, as it just becomes about sneaking in the ciggies and the drink so that the kids don't know and that's how my evenings are spent now and I really can't be bothered with all the energy I spend doing this..
Both addictions are taking their toll..
I often pop in here to see who is still around and I always watch for JT in the hopes he will let someone know how he is too..
Thank you for thinking of me..
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