Class of February 2016 Part 17
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Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: England
Posts: 2,675
Leezer - Two months tomorrow! Well done. You're right, we're all doing great. We're all still here and trying to stay sober so we're on the right track.
Del - Hope the tapering works out for you. I kind of accidentally tapered and my withdrawal symptoms were a lot more bearable.
And yeah, my toenails have been holding on for a few months and are finally deciding it's time to leave now.
PHRD - You're sounding like you're in a good place, it's great! Two months tomorrow for you as well!!
Yeah, I saw the toenail pictures. Alcohol messes with our bodies in weird ways.
OOTT - It's also great to see you in such a good place. I feel the same way - I did some awful things when my drinking was coming to an end, but it needed to happen for me to quit, so I'm glad it happened.
No visit from the toenail fairy thus far, perhaps I should be leaving it in my shoe overnight rather than under the pillow?
Del - Hope the tapering works out for you. I kind of accidentally tapered and my withdrawal symptoms were a lot more bearable.
And yeah, my toenails have been holding on for a few months and are finally deciding it's time to leave now.
PHRD - You're sounding like you're in a good place, it's great! Two months tomorrow for you as well!!
Yeah, I saw the toenail pictures. Alcohol messes with our bodies in weird ways.
OOTT - It's also great to see you in such a good place. I feel the same way - I did some awful things when my drinking was coming to an end, but it needed to happen for me to quit, so I'm glad it happened.
No visit from the toenail fairy thus far, perhaps I should be leaving it in my shoe overnight rather than under the pillow?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 508
Del please be super careful with both tapering and not drinking so much. I knew someone who quit cold turkey and saw the effects happen in a public place. It is dangerous. You have this new job and you are so excited. You are doing all the right things - hold on the best you can. Drinking has very high percentage of scewing things up and especially in the workplace. I really liked your quote about thoughts about the past and future causing you to not be in control or present today. Thats what its all about and just that. Start quieting the thoughts just a bit each day. Tell your brain no thats not what I'm thinking about right now.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 508
OT your toenails will take 4 months to grow back and will look great! Great job Lee on 60 with me today! Congrats Applekat because I know you made it sober buddy! Two freakin months! And all I have to do to keep the awesome life is to never take a sip again. Not one. Sip.
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,849
Well things are going well. I forgot to say I really wanted to pick up a bottle of wine yesterday. I didn't. I was very proud of myself. Up early this morning. Counting down the days til the start of work. 
Have a great day Februdoodles!
Have a great day Februdoodles!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 451
Good morning everyone.
It is Thursday morning for me and I’m posting this right away today in order to tell on my AV in advance in the event that my AV starts to get loud today.
Today is the anniversary of my Mother’s death. She was murdered 34 years ago when I was 11 years old – in 1982. Although there was a prime suspect early on, the case was handled very poorly in the early years and the case became cold.
I did not realize the truth about my Mom’s murder until I was 32 years old – in 2002. I realized the reality that my father was the prime suspect but unfortunately all of the evidence against him has been circumstantial. I worked with the police and wore a wire and had a SWAT team back me up as I confronted my father. The case needed a confession that would hold up in court. Unfortunately, the many attempts to obtain a confession did not succeed.
It has been a little over a year now since I had my last confrontation with my father. It’s been really hard for me to deal with the fact that my mother’s murder is still unsolved and the case is still considered cold…and there still is no justice.
Today will be my first time dealing with April 28th completely sober since I first figured out my father’s guilt and his role in my Mother’s murder (14 years ago) …I’ve been escaping and numbing myself.
So today I’m hoping that I somehow experience some healing and can “let go” and focus more on remembering my Mom and trust that my father will eventually have to deal with justice…if not here on earth…he will eventually face the truth.
So tonight I might have to break out the advanced Tae Bo and really work out hard to tire myself out and help to deal with any crazy AV urges!!!
It is Thursday morning for me and I’m posting this right away today in order to tell on my AV in advance in the event that my AV starts to get loud today.
Today is the anniversary of my Mother’s death. She was murdered 34 years ago when I was 11 years old – in 1982. Although there was a prime suspect early on, the case was handled very poorly in the early years and the case became cold.
I did not realize the truth about my Mom’s murder until I was 32 years old – in 2002. I realized the reality that my father was the prime suspect but unfortunately all of the evidence against him has been circumstantial. I worked with the police and wore a wire and had a SWAT team back me up as I confronted my father. The case needed a confession that would hold up in court. Unfortunately, the many attempts to obtain a confession did not succeed.
It has been a little over a year now since I had my last confrontation with my father. It’s been really hard for me to deal with the fact that my mother’s murder is still unsolved and the case is still considered cold…and there still is no justice.
Today will be my first time dealing with April 28th completely sober since I first figured out my father’s guilt and his role in my Mother’s murder (14 years ago) …I’ve been escaping and numbing myself.
So today I’m hoping that I somehow experience some healing and can “let go” and focus more on remembering my Mom and trust that my father will eventually have to deal with justice…if not here on earth…he will eventually face the truth.
So tonight I might have to break out the advanced Tae Bo and really work out hard to tire myself out and help to deal with any crazy AV urges!!!
Is there anyone who could support you today? I'm so sorry for all the pain you've endured. Please reach out lots. Xoxo sending you love and strength.
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Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 451
Thanks guys! I'm not sure what will happen today but I'm really feeling positive about confronting this without numbing myself and seeing what happens. Work will be distracting during the day so I'm just really trying to be cautious about tonight...
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Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Out in the Stix of Southern Indiana
Posts: 2,784
thanks you guys for all your posts. it's like an aa meeting at home. and when people are typing they don't say "you know" every other word. i am new here. sorry to hear about your mom amazing, good luck tonite. stay busy!
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Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 617
Aj- I'd totally hang out with you all day, go riding!! I'm so so sorry to hear that. I will pray for you today. Stay strong and vigilant. I'm also available for anything you need, PM if you'd like.
Happy 60 Lee! Keep it up.
Good morning everyone else.... quick check in before I run out and lose a bit more of my mind.
81 days. Told my neighbor this morning (that I used to drink with all the time) that I quit drinking. I haven't talked to them since I stopped. He asked me about the positives of stopping. He said he just see's it as a reward to himself. He's an every day too. Maybe something struck a chord, maybe not. But I wasn't uncomfortable telling my story or my positives. Came natural. I'm more embarrassed by my drinking self than I'll ever be with my sober self.
Talk to you all soon!
Happy 60 Lee! Keep it up.
Good morning everyone else.... quick check in before I run out and lose a bit more of my mind.
81 days. Told my neighbor this morning (that I used to drink with all the time) that I quit drinking. I haven't talked to them since I stopped. He asked me about the positives of stopping. He said he just see's it as a reward to himself. He's an every day too. Maybe something struck a chord, maybe not. But I wasn't uncomfortable telling my story or my positives. Came natural. I'm more embarrassed by my drinking self than I'll ever be with my sober self.
Talk to you all soon!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: middle of nowhere
Posts: 2,849
Hi tomls! Hi 360
The head is going places today I'm not ready to go yet. It's creating a lot of anxiety for me and it's giving me trigger warnings.
I've decided that every time I look at the clock I'm going to say, "woo-hoo!! It's X o'clock and I'm still sober! "
Even if it's every two minutes. It's dumb but it's working. Lol
The head is going places today I'm not ready to go yet. It's creating a lot of anxiety for me and it's giving me trigger warnings.
I've decided that every time I look at the clock I'm going to say, "woo-hoo!! It's X o'clock and I'm still sober! "
Even if it's every two minutes. It's dumb but it's working. Lol
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 451
Ughh...for the first time in so very long (over 1 year at least) I just had a complicated/complex migraine!
When these first started happening to me, I thought I was having a stroke. After useless testing in the ER a few times and urgent care, I was finally diagnosed a couple of years ago with complex/complicated migraines.
My symptoms are always the same...it starts with vision issues. I see spots, can't read, then I cannot concentrate. Then one of my hands gets numb...then the other hand. Often that numbness spreads up into my mouth and my tongue gets numb, then my speech gets all garbled and finally, I actually get a terrible headache after I come down from all the symptoms.
Today all the symptoms stopped at my numb hands thankfully but I did have a hard time being able to speak...I couldn't say computer for goodness sake...I'm in IT. Luckily it didn't get as bad into the garbled speech though!
Anyway, now i feel like crap and waiting for the aspirin to kick in.
I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY NO MATTER WHAT AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE MY MIND!!!
When these first started happening to me, I thought I was having a stroke. After useless testing in the ER a few times and urgent care, I was finally diagnosed a couple of years ago with complex/complicated migraines.
My symptoms are always the same...it starts with vision issues. I see spots, can't read, then I cannot concentrate. Then one of my hands gets numb...then the other hand. Often that numbness spreads up into my mouth and my tongue gets numb, then my speech gets all garbled and finally, I actually get a terrible headache after I come down from all the symptoms.
Today all the symptoms stopped at my numb hands thankfully but I did have a hard time being able to speak...I couldn't say computer for goodness sake...I'm in IT. Luckily it didn't get as bad into the garbled speech though!
Anyway, now i feel like crap and waiting for the aspirin to kick in.
I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY NO MATTER WHAT AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE MY MIND!!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 617
Originally Posted by amazingjoy 
Ughh...for the first time in so very long (over 1 year at least) I just had a complicated/complex migraine!
When these first started happening to me, I thought I was having a stroke. After useless testing in the ER a few times and urgent care, I was finally diagnosed a couple of years ago with complex/complicated migraines.
My symptoms are always the same...it starts with vision issues. I see spots, can't read, then I cannot concentrate. Then one of my hands gets numb...then the other hand. Often that numbness spreads up into my mouth and my tongue gets numb, then my speech gets all garbled and finally, I actually get a terrible headache after I come down from all the symptoms.
Today all the symptoms stopped at my numb hands thankfully but I did have a hard time being able to speak...I couldn't say computer for goodness sake...I'm in IT. Luckily it didn't get as bad into the garbled speech though!
Anyway, now i feel like crap and waiting for the aspirin to kick in.
I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY NO MATTER WHAT AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE MY MIND!!!
When these first started happening to me, I thought I was having a stroke. After useless testing in the ER a few times and urgent care, I was finally diagnosed a couple of years ago with complex/complicated migraines.
My symptoms are always the same...it starts with vision issues. I see spots, can't read, then I cannot concentrate. Then one of my hands gets numb...then the other hand. Often that numbness spreads up into my mouth and my tongue gets numb, then my speech gets all garbled and finally, I actually get a terrible headache after I come down from all the symptoms.
Today all the symptoms stopped at my numb hands thankfully but I did have a hard time being able to speak...I couldn't say computer for goodness sake...I'm in IT. Luckily it didn't get as bad into the garbled speech though!
Anyway, now i feel like crap and waiting for the aspirin to kick in.
I WILL NOT DRINK TODAY NO MATTER WHAT AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE MY MIND!!!
I have true empathy for you. Not only is today a hard day but put this on top of it. Being tested, but I KNOW you will pass this test. You are strong in your resolve.
Rooting for you AJ!
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