Class of February 2016 Part 15
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 508
JL it is more common these days to have 50-50 custody and only pay child support based on any big difference in income. Think about your kids and know that they are affected by and know when there is tension, arguing, etc way more than having two happy parents with two homes.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 1,021
Originally Posted by JL2014 
TTR, skip this -I hate this and I'm so sad.
Personally, my solution to most dilemmas is to try and take the high road. It may not be the most comfortable option, but it's always the right option and no matter what else happens, I can look at myself in the mirror.
I just wish I had more to offer, but I'm not married and I don't have kids, so my experience in these types of family matter is pretty much zilch.
I wish you the best with whatever you decide.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 451
Sorry you are going through so much JL...not trying to blame here but the results of thyroid disorder can also cause crazy things in people and inabilities to cope with anything...and severe depression and skew one's thinking...and it can take a while to "fix" it and it requires really good doctors because it's not a "one size fits all" approach...and it can be an undiagnosed issue that causes behavior changes for years before being diagnosed...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 2,049
AJ, you're dead on, and she's been sick, sick, and sick. Last weekend she talked to her deceased father in her sleep all night. I know she's hurting something awful. It's killing me, more so since I'm sober and catching it . I've been a bad husband too, and I'm ashamed of it. Our kids are so happy and good. I feel like we don't deserve them or something. I'm emotionally involved and can't make any sound decision in the middle of a situation like that.
Thank y'all for opinions/ insight.
I think I'm gonna just ignore all the BS until at least 60 or 90 days. As much as things change I'm sure it'll be different by then.
Us being sober , we have a free pass to live life and not wAste it being intoxicated.
I'm living it.
Pizza decision tomorrow. Ice cream is excellent idea as well ! Both sounds even better--
Thank y'all for opinions/ insight.
I think I'm gonna just ignore all the BS until at least 60 or 90 days. As much as things change I'm sure it'll be different by then.
Us being sober , we have a free pass to live life and not wAste it being intoxicated.
I'm living it.
Pizza decision tomorrow. Ice cream is excellent idea as well ! Both sounds even better--
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 534
Have just caught up on all the posts. Wow! Lol
I watched season 1 of the walking dead and didn't love it so didn't watch anymore. Maybe I should catch up?
I have to tell you all that my sober app says 'you have been sober for 2 months' today.
I watched season 1 of the walking dead and didn't love it so didn't watch anymore. Maybe I should catch up?
I have to tell you all that my sober app says 'you have been sober for 2 months' today.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: Where the Honey is
Posts: 728
Originally Posted by JL2014
I think I'm gonna just ignore all the BS until at least 60 or 90 days. As much as things change I'm sure it'll be different by then.
Us being sober , we have a free pass to live life and not wAste it being intoxicated.
I'm living it.
Pizza decision tomorrow. Ice cream is excellent idea as well ! Both sounds even better--
Us being sober , we have a free pass to live life and not wAste it being intoxicated.
I'm living it.
Pizza decision tomorrow. Ice cream is excellent idea as well ! Both sounds even better--
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 3,597
I have a conference all day at SeaTac airport tomorrow that should be keep me busy. I don't know why we're meeting there, it just seems like a big hassle to deal with being in an airport all day, but that's where it it's going to be. What a pain.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 3,597
Originally Posted by JL2014
TTR, skip this -
Yesterday I learn firsthand why spouses have separate Facebook accounts. We've had a joint one for however long it's been going.
She went back and saw a comment a made to a mentally handicapped person who was fixating on her and sending her messages saying honey and sweet at 10pm at night. I wasn't rude to the guy, as he was a "friend of her dads", but I sent a message because I saw where her cousin had said "did you see what that guy put on your FB"
She went bonkers and told me I had no right to say anything to a friend of her fathers and kicked me off the joint acct.
this happened a few months ago but I guess she just saw it last night.
Every way we can be yanked apart were getting that way.
There's not really anything for me to do if we divorce, except go to jail, because it's impossible to pay child suppt on 3 kids and live anywhere. I mean anywhere. I never would've thought it'd come to this but it just goes on and on. Refusing to talk, only fight and argue. Maybe drinking did this or at least was a factor, and I hope I'm wrong about what I see( i AM wrong a lot).
I hate this and I'm so sad.
Yesterday I learn firsthand why spouses have separate Facebook accounts. We've had a joint one for however long it's been going.
She went back and saw a comment a made to a mentally handicapped person who was fixating on her and sending her messages saying honey and sweet at 10pm at night. I wasn't rude to the guy, as he was a "friend of her dads", but I sent a message because I saw where her cousin had said "did you see what that guy put on your FB"
She went bonkers and told me I had no right to say anything to a friend of her fathers and kicked me off the joint acct.
this happened a few months ago but I guess she just saw it last night.
Every way we can be yanked apart were getting that way.
There's not really anything for me to do if we divorce, except go to jail, because it's impossible to pay child suppt on 3 kids and live anywhere. I mean anywhere. I never would've thought it'd come to this but it just goes on and on. Refusing to talk, only fight and argue. Maybe drinking did this or at least was a factor, and I hope I'm wrong about what I see( i AM wrong a lot).
I hate this and I'm so sad.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: South East England
Posts: 8,009
Morning all. So sorry, I'm finding it really hard to keep up with this thread, and think I may bow out for a while. I will come back and keep you all updated.
Currently at 67 days, and am off on my retreat today and not back until Sunday. I'm hoping that at the very least it will add another layer to my recovery. I'm feeling strong and committed and know I have to work very hard to stay that way.
Love to you all ❤️
Currently at 67 days, and am off on my retreat today and not back until Sunday. I'm hoping that at the very least it will add another layer to my recovery. I'm feeling strong and committed and know I have to work very hard to stay that way.
Love to you all ❤️
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I rarely comment on marriages and relationships unless there's violence or some kind of abuse going on.
Obviously this is not one of those cases.
I think the plan to see what happens is pretty reasonable JL - who knows?
you may think vastly differently by 90 days, let alone 6 months.
There will always be support here
D
Obviously this is not one of those cases.
I think the plan to see what happens is pretty reasonable JL - who knows?
you may think vastly differently by 90 days, let alone 6 months.
There will always be support here
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by PHRD
Checking in. Good job group. When I look at the March 8 th list I actually see a lot of us still here! Sometimes people go 4-5 days without checking in and at least two people have changed their names. Anyway keep up the good work! Night all.
Originally Posted by JL2014
TTR, skip this -
Yesterday I learn firsthand why spouses have separate Facebook accounts. We've had a joint one for however long it's been going.
She went back and saw a comment a made to a mentally handicapped person who was fixating on her and sending her messages saying honey and sweet at 10pm at night. I wasn't rude to the guy, as he was a "friend of her dads", but I sent a message because I saw where her cousin had said "did you see what that guy put on your FB"
She went bonkers and told me I had no right to say anything to a friend of her fathers and kicked me off the joint acct.
this happened a few months ago but I guess she just saw it last night.
Every way we can be yanked apart were getting that way.
There's not really anything for me to do if we divorce, except go to jail, because it's impossible to pay child suppt on 3 kids and live anywhere. I mean anywhere. I never would've thought it'd come to this but it just goes on and on. Refusing to talk, only fight and argue. Maybe drinking did this or at least was a factor, and I hope I'm wrong about what I see( i AM wrong a lot).
I hate this and I'm so sad.
Yesterday I learn firsthand why spouses have separate Facebook accounts. We've had a joint one for however long it's been going.
She went back and saw a comment a made to a mentally handicapped person who was fixating on her and sending her messages saying honey and sweet at 10pm at night. I wasn't rude to the guy, as he was a "friend of her dads", but I sent a message because I saw where her cousin had said "did you see what that guy put on your FB"
She went bonkers and told me I had no right to say anything to a friend of her fathers and kicked me off the joint acct.
this happened a few months ago but I guess she just saw it last night.
Every way we can be yanked apart were getting that way.
There's not really anything for me to do if we divorce, except go to jail, because it's impossible to pay child suppt on 3 kids and live anywhere. I mean anywhere. I never would've thought it'd come to this but it just goes on and on. Refusing to talk, only fight and argue. Maybe drinking did this or at least was a factor, and I hope I'm wrong about what I see( i AM wrong a lot).
I hate this and I'm so sad.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 3,403
Originally Posted by Jeni26
Morning all. So sorry, I'm finding it really hard to keep up with this thread, and think I may bow out for a while. I will come back and keep you all updated.
Currently at 67 days, and am off on my retreat today and not back until Sunday. I'm hoping that at the very least it will add another layer to my recovery. I'm feeling strong and committed and know I have to work very hard to stay that way.
Love to you all ❤️
Currently at 67 days, and am off on my retreat today and not back until Sunday. I'm hoping that at the very least it will add another layer to my recovery. I'm feeling strong and committed and know I have to work very hard to stay that way.
Love to you all ❤️
Let us know what the retreat is like...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 2,049
Originally Posted by Outonthetiles
Make a good faith effort at counselling, and insist she be evaluated for chemical imbalance (mental issues), as well as a physical issue. Give it one month. If the marriage does not improve, pull the plug. Child support may not be as brutal as you think. How old are the children, if you're comfortable disclosing that.
7 and 2 yr old boys .
She has mental/emotional issues, just getting through has finally started rebounding off me. Maybe helped me drink through the years, but I'm just seeing now after being sober.
Just info.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
