wittyuserid

Dee thanks for posting that. I never thought about it like that. But that's exactly what I do and I think most of us do....think we overreacted. Especially when drinking seems to be the norm...everyone does it...why can't I?

wittyuserid

Just curious, what made you want to quit drinking in the first place?

whiteturtle

I was drinking at least a bottle of wine a day, and as time went on, it started to be a little over a bottle (I am not sure exactly how much, since I would buy the double bottles of wine, but I know I was buying one of those at least every other day). There were many nights where I would brown/black out and have to rewatch an episode of a show I "watched" the night before. More mornings than I care to admit, I would text my boyfriend while he was at work, fishing to find out if I did anything terrible that I forgot about.

It just didn't seem healthy to be drinking a bottle of wine a day or even every other day, or to be blacking out as often as I did. I had been experiencing aphasia for the past couple years. I am just overall worried about my health.

This was my first post on here:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...p-my-wine.html

Bebrave

White, I totally get you you. It's not a way to live is it? I'm worried about my health and just having a better more meaningful life,

whiteturtle

Aaand I just got upset with my boyfriend because he had a tone at me from his being annoyed with his videogame, which in my usual depressive state I took badly, and now feel like we should just break up so he doesn't have to deal with my burdens. I am mentally spiraling tonight, I know that. I am so close to getting wine, that's all I can think about. I'm sorry to everyone, I feel worse knowing I keep posting on here and worrying and complaining.

Dee74

The first few days are rough - there's no getting around that...but if you can stick it out things do get better.

If you drink again you'll just end up back at this same spot again...so keep going

D

KeepingOn

Hang in there, WT. You can be strong.

Caramel

I believe you can do this. Keep posting as much as you like.

wittyuserid

I find comfort in your postings. I've done the same things you are posting about. Plus at least we know you are here and you aren't drinking. Post on! I've been posting my complaints for the last three day.

wittyuserid

I just read your first post - whiteturtle. Pretty powerful stuff and great reasons to quit drinking! I understand the part about letting people know you are quitting drinking and then being forced to be held accountable. I'm there right now. I don't want to tell anyone. I've told a few people. It's scary.

Caramel

Time for me to go and mix my protein-drink and make my chamomile tea, and look forward to a restful night's sleep.
Stay well, everyone. Thinking of you.

Olivia2011

I've got another day sober! I've been thinking a lot about just accepting that I can no longer drink. This past week I just don't want to continue living like this.... Drinking that is (it's been a lot longer than this past week but I think (and pray) that I am finally done with it). I got out a three year old doctor/outpatient visit notes and googled some stuff on it. A lot of these mild (for now anyway) findings say that stress and excessive alcohol contributes to these problems.
The urges came and went today. Life is precious. Life is a gift. I can't drink normally so why drink at all. The phrase "play the tape thru to the end" kept popping up... And I played it.... Bed too early...up half the night....waking thinking Dam I did it again.... Anxiety (worst part). None for me and going to bed. Hope tom is the same. Good luck to everyone.

Olivia

KeepingOn

Tour de France is done for the day. Time for the mystery novel and sleep. Sober again! Woohoo!😀

wittyuserid

Yup...bed too early, up half the night, anxiety. I've also felt like a burden sometimes. For what? A buzz that lasts a few minutes and then I'm blacked out and miserable the next day until that next drink. It's not worth it.

Italian

Hi Everyone- count me in! My sobriety date is July 5, 2015. I have been addicted to marijuana since 2011. Honestly, this site has been my inspiration to quit and couldn't do it without the positive support and encouragement of Dee74 and others. I hope to give back and support you all in our fight for SOBRIETY!!! Blessings - Italian

wittyuserid

Welcome Italian....glad you're here and congrats on 2 days!

whiteturtle

Thank you everyone, so much, for reading and/or responding to my posts. This has obviously been a weak night. But I did it! Stores are now closed, so no way to get wine for me. Made it through eight days sober.

Day 9 tomorrow.

I feel so weak for tonight, and worried about the future if it was this hard only 9 days in. To everyone else feeling the same, keep going. We're actually doing this, even if you're only one day in, despite how hard it is. I hope I will have less nights like this one and more that are just positive in sobriety.

Thank you again, everyone. I am once again indebted to this place and all of you.

wittyuserid

So glad to hear this!!! Feels good doesn't it? You won!! See you tomorrow.

Dee74

Welcome Italian - great stuff today everyone

D

Plath

Particularly this, but I can personally relate to pretty much everything you've said tonight (except that I'm married, but I do end up deleting half of what I've posted on Facebook when I've been drinking).

There have been so many nights when I've hemmed and hawed about whether or not I "should" go to the store for wine or beer (which is embarrassing enough as it stands, when you live in a small town and the same cashiers see exactly how much alcohol I buy every night).

This is only my second night (I stopped for a while a year ago, when I realized I had a problem, but I allowed it to become "acceptable" again), but I can only hope that I can keep going. I'm glad that we all have this site, and each other.

Thanks for posting, I'm struggling too. But still not drinking, although it's been kind of a rough evening mentally and psychologically.