Class of September 2013 - Part 29
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Strailya
Posts: 8,038
I'm back and no one has posted ?!? Gosh, Saturday night must be heating up in the Northern Hemisphere 
Anyway, so some more details on black magic
It is prevalent in South East Asia. It is usually not publicised and while the locals will roll their eyes if asked whether they believe in it, privately they are wary. In the instances that I know of, it usually involves controlling another individual. The perpetrator will take something personal from the victim (hair, jewellery,etc) and ask a shaman, usually a bomoh, to treat it. This is done through the creation of a powder of sorts using the personal item which is fed to the victim (unwittingly) and as well hide the powder inside the victim's residence. Once consumed, the victim will fall under a trance or spell and be under the control of the perpetrator. It sounds a bit like ****** ! A wife of one couple told her experience in explicit detail about how her husband's behaviour completely changed, how he was unfaithful, squandered all the family's assets and was almost ruined. She believed an enemy perpetrated this and consulted her priest. She also found the hidden package of powder in her attic. The priest gave her prayers and tokens to counter the spell which took several years to overcome. Finally, he appears to have been cured and has returned to normal. So, the wife of my friend believes the same has happened to my friend as well given that his behaviour appears to have become erratic. However, I dont plan on visiting his attic anytime soon...
Anyway, so some more details on black magic
It is prevalent in South East Asia. It is usually not publicised and while the locals will roll their eyes if asked whether they believe in it, privately they are wary. In the instances that I know of, it usually involves controlling another individual. The perpetrator will take something personal from the victim (hair, jewellery,etc) and ask a shaman, usually a bomoh, to treat it. This is done through the creation of a powder of sorts using the personal item which is fed to the victim (unwittingly) and as well hide the powder inside the victim's residence. Once consumed, the victim will fall under a trance or spell and be under the control of the perpetrator. It sounds a bit like ****** ! A wife of one couple told her experience in explicit detail about how her husband's behaviour completely changed, how he was unfaithful, squandered all the family's assets and was almost ruined. She believed an enemy perpetrated this and consulted her priest. She also found the hidden package of powder in her attic. The priest gave her prayers and tokens to counter the spell which took several years to overcome. Finally, he appears to have been cured and has returned to normal. So, the wife of my friend believes the same has happened to my friend as well given that his behaviour appears to have become erratic. However, I dont plan on visiting his attic anytime soon...
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
Kane it does sound like ******. Where I'm from (Gullah culture) it's called "Hoodoo."
Interesting that it is being used in the context of divorce/infidelity though! I dunno if I believe in curses/hexes, but I do believe in bad/evil energy! I have personally experienced evil stuff that I can't explain!
Interesting that it is being used in the context of divorce/infidelity though! I dunno if I believe in curses/hexes, but I do believe in bad/evil energy! I have personally experienced evil stuff that I can't explain!
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
Saturday was busy for me. I only made it to one of two parties but I had a lot of fun and I'm glad I went!
Two friends (one who is in AA and the other who is an AA/MA double-winner like me) celebrated their 1 year sobriety date together and threw a house party. I love sober house parties! They're fun and hilarious and the conversation is so much better (and more memorable)
The hilarious part was the fact that, although most people knew each other, the alcoholics mostly hung out in the kitchen by the seltzer and cranberry while the stoners ended up sitting in a circle on the floor of one of the bedrooms. Had there been booze and weed there, I'm sure the party would have taken a similar form!
Old habits die hard I guess!
Two friends (one who is in AA and the other who is an AA/MA double-winner like me) celebrated their 1 year sobriety date together and threw a house party. I love sober house parties! They're fun and hilarious and the conversation is so much better (and more memorable
)The hilarious part was the fact that, although most people knew each other, the alcoholics mostly hung out in the kitchen by the seltzer and cranberry while the stoners ended up sitting in a circle on the floor of one of the bedrooms. Had there been booze and weed there, I'm sure the party would have taken a similar form!
Old habits die hard I guess!
Perpetual Optimist
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: LA
Posts: 1,371
I'm not sure if I mentioned my creepy new boss on here, but He has been inappropriate to several women and has done a few things to me that made me uncomfortable (including putting his hands in my hair and asking if it was real or a weave).
I reported his behavior to our superior yesterday and will have a meeting with them on Monday. Another woman he harassed said she doesn't want to come forward because (unfortunately) she doesn't trust our superior to do the right thing with that information. What is also unfortunate is that he is 33.
Either way he is an idiot. Truly. And I'm glad I said something!
I reported his behavior to our superior yesterday and will have a meeting with them on Monday. Another woman he harassed said she doesn't want to come forward because (unfortunately) she doesn't trust our superior to do the right thing with that information. What is also unfortunate is that he is 33.
Either way he is an idiot. Truly. And I'm glad I said something!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Good for oyu Brooksie. That sounds pretty intolerable. Hands in your hair? WTF?
My dd(with my help) had to report a fellow student a couple of weeks ago for sexual harrassment. The story started withhim telling her very vulgar words we had to look up in the Urban Dictionary, and then she hadded a tidbit about him trying to poke her somewhere with his ruler. Ummm, doubletake whiplash for mommy. What?! Umm, dear, we need to talk to the guidance counselor. He has barely said a word to her since, and there has been no social fallout for her, so far.
It is the right thing to report this sort of thing. Sexual harrassment is unacceptable.
My dd(with my help) had to report a fellow student a couple of weeks ago for sexual harrassment. The story started withhim telling her very vulgar words we had to look up in the Urban Dictionary, and then she hadded a tidbit about him trying to poke her somewhere with his ruler. Ummm, doubletake whiplash for mommy. What?! Umm, dear, we need to talk to the guidance counselor. He has barely said a word to her since, and there has been no social fallout for her, so far.
It is the right thing to report this sort of thing. Sexual harrassment is unacceptable.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Kaneda, yikes, that black magic stuff sounds like quite a violation. Feeding someone their powdered hairbrush, or whatever. Toxic, and a violation to sneak something foreign into someone's body. This is a subject that really bothers me. It includes drugging others in a drink, forcing others to try foods that are questionable, and relates to having a child with life threatening food allergies. It makes one hyper aware at how much others want to force others to consume foods, drinks, etc... when they say no. You would be amazed.
But this, sneaking something into someone's body, and it is not even food, is really something that could be toxic. Such a violation.
But this, sneaking something into someone's body, and it is not even food, is really something that could be toxic. Such a violation.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Originally Posted by Renarde 
I had a magical day with kiddo. I realize that kiddo needs more one on one time with me. I have been dedicating too much time and effort to school and work and not enough to her. That really hurts me to admit but it is true. She bloomed like a flower today with just three hours of one on one attention from me. It felt very good for my spirit as well. I have been fighting some depression lately and it's put me in a fog. I spent a long time reading a special book with her before bed and she stopped me and said, "mommy. I have something I need to talk to you about. I LOVE YOU!" And then she repeated it over and over. It was so wonderful. Much better than sitting on the couch in a wine haze on Friday night.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Originally Posted by Renarde
Grace, I've had some similar thoughts lately of wishing to be normal. Then I wake up in the morning glad that I am not hungover. Good for you for driving by!
Glad we're sticking to our guns! Yay hangover free!!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
Interesting stuff about the black magic, etc. That is very scary and nothing to mess with. In my little sheltered world the most toxic thing I encounter is Facebook! I remember when I found out that a couple in our neighborhood were swingers, I was in shock!
Brooksie and Rochele, good job not letting these guys get away with their inappropriate behavior. I wish I had blown the whistle a couple times when I was younger. Honestly, as a mom, I would hope that my son would get called on the carpet for inappropriate behavior early on so that he could learn and change his behaviors early in life.
I am glad the weekend is almost over. Too many triggers as I am dealing with tapering off the Paxil. I feel myself wanting to drink to deal with agitation and irritability. Old habits die hard!
Brooksie and Rochele, good job not letting these guys get away with their inappropriate behavior. I wish I had blown the whistle a couple times when I was younger. Honestly, as a mom, I would hope that my son would get called on the carpet for inappropriate behavior early on so that he could learn and change his behaviors early in life.
I am glad the weekend is almost over. Too many triggers as I am dealing with tapering off the Paxil. I feel myself wanting to drink to deal with agitation and irritability. Old habits die hard!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Soberspace
Posts: 591
Hey, guys!
Not much going on here, off to work in a few minutes.
Will update my CV tonight if there is time between cases.
Met with a friend this friday after work, he was the first to know when I decided to go sober and he was happy for me that I managed half a year already
Almost 8 months, just a few more days..
Take care.
And Br00ksie, that harassment stuff sucks. Blech
Not much going on here, off to work in a few minutes.
Will update my CV tonight if there is time between cases.
Met with a friend this friday after work, he was the first to know when I decided to go sober and he was happy for me that I managed half a year already
Almost 8 months, just a few more days..
Take care.
And Br00ksie, that harassment stuff sucks. Blech
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Grace, I do think general aggitation and anxiety are huge triggers. When I try to focus on just *why* I want to drink, I never come up with any truly deep reasons or big gaps in life that i can truly fix. But the constant stresses and aggitation of day to day life really get me craving sometimes. I do suffer anxiety and do not take meds anymore. I had side effects from all of them, mostly fatigue, but Prozac caused me increased anxiety. It was horrible. What a nightmare that was. But, I have to admit I was never completely or much sober when I was taking them.
I hope you feel better and better and it works for you to be off the meds. I find I have th eleast anxiety and depressions symptoms when I exercise regularly and get good sleep. Yet, when depression creeps up, exercise is hard to do.
I hope you feel better and better and it works for you to be off the meds. I find I have th eleast anxiety and depressions symptoms when I exercise regularly and get good sleep. Yet, when depression creeps up, exercise is hard to do.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Originally Posted by GotGrace
Interesting stuff about the black magic, etc. That is very scary and nothing to mess with. In my little sheltered world the most toxic thing I encounter is Facebook! I remember when I found out that a couple in our neighborhood were swingers, I was in shock!
…
I am glad the weekend is almost over. Too many triggers as I am dealing with tapering off the Paxil. I feel myself wanting to drink to deal with agitation and irritability. Old habits die hard!
…
I am glad the weekend is almost over. Too many triggers as I am dealing with tapering off the Paxil. I feel myself wanting to drink to deal with agitation and irritability. Old habits die hard!
I'm hoping the rest of your weekend finds you more relaxed, too, Grace. I suffer from chronic anxiety and some of that's excavated over the past two weeks, and THAT'S when I feel most susceptible to my AV talking. I'm hoping you can rely on some of the other tools you've developed along your journey to naturally battle your demons (sticking with the evil theme above haha). I've been forcing myself to decompress by using one or more of the following a lot lately: listening to music that brings me UP, taking nice long showers with scented soaps, WALKING, making lists of all I'm thankful for, and refocusing on the moment no matter what I'm doing… even breathing.
Hugs, GGrace!!!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 1,534
Originally Posted by NewLeaf
Agree about the black magic stuff… very scary. That and anything dealing with the occult on any level really give me the heebie jeebies. And Grace, I'm easily shocked as well. My kids and husband think it's a hoot. I hate to think what this world's coming to sometimes, especially with all the networking technology and rapid "sharing" going on. For example, I watched a piece on the news today about the potential dangers of using apps which allow people to put in their location to find "dates" on the spot within a certain radius. Potential dangers? Call me old fashioned but D'UH!
I'm hoping the rest of your weekend finds you more relaxed, too, Grace. I suffer from chronic anxiety and some of that's excavated over the past two weeks, and THAT'S when I feel most susceptible to my AV talking. I'm hoping you can rely on some of the other tools you've developed along your journey to naturally battle your demons (sticking with the evil theme above haha). I've been forcing myself to decompress by using one or more of the following a lot lately: listening to music that brings me UP, taking nice long showers with scented soaps, WALKING, making lists of all I'm thankful for, and refocusing on the moment no matter what I'm doing… even breathing.
Hugs, GGrace!!!
I'm hoping the rest of your weekend finds you more relaxed, too, Grace. I suffer from chronic anxiety and some of that's excavated over the past two weeks, and THAT'S when I feel most susceptible to my AV talking. I'm hoping you can rely on some of the other tools you've developed along your journey to naturally battle your demons (sticking with the evil theme above haha). I've been forcing myself to decompress by using one or more of the following a lot lately: listening to music that brings me UP, taking nice long showers with scented soaps, WALKING, making lists of all I'm thankful for, and refocusing on the moment no matter what I'm doing… even breathing.
Hugs, GGrace!!!
My ankle is screwed up right now which takes walks out of the picture and that really bums me out. I should get back to yoga, but like you said, Rochele, it is difficult to motivate when your head is messing with you.
I began a gratitude journal over Lent in an effort to take on a discipline rather than give up a habit. I am sticking with it because it seems like a very healthy thing to do. It always surprises me when I have trouble coming up with 3 things to be grateful for when my life is so abundantly blessed. Even just having money for groceries should send me into shouts of praise, but some days all I can focus on is what's not quite right. Over all, though, I feel ok about where I am at and I am hopeful for the immediate future. If everyone around me could just stop being so annoying I would have it made!
Rainy and cold here today so I am taking my young girls to see "Bears" this afternoon. I love documentaries and bears, so I am really looking forward to it (along with the Easter candy we plan to smuggle in).
Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 1,397
Sorry about that ankle, Grace! I bought a yoga mat and a block one night about a month ago thinking I'd get motivated having it within easy reach, but alas… they're still in their original packaging sitting in the corner of my dining room. On of these days the three of us… you, me and Rochele will find things clicking and we'll figure it all out, I'm sure. The fact we've all been motivated enough to work on the drinking is HUGE, I think!
Have fun at the movies, and ohhhh … you're being so daring with the proposed contraband! lol
Have fun at the movies, and ohhhh … you're being so daring with the proposed contraband! lol
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
I do actually think I made it onto my elliptical machine 4 times this week, and walked a few times as well. Even did some ab/core exercises last night and this morning. 
Haha, Grace, we also smuggled in Easter Candy to Captain America. We quite enjoyed it, dd and I especially.
Haha, Grace, we also smuggled in Easter Candy to Captain America. We quite enjoyed it, dd and I especially.
Velveteen Rabbit
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: San Diego, Cali
Posts: 2,661
My, what an interesting morning I've had reading about black magic, bomah and then the Gullah culture. 
Learning some things that I didn't know about before this morning - I'm grateful.
I completely understand why someone would think that infidelity must be the result of magic. Just about every person involved that I have ever talked to (I moderated a Board like Dee does here), felt their cheating spouse changed completely and turned into someone they didn't recognize any more.
Not magic (I don't think at least) - brain chemistry. "Love" pumps all kinds of drugs into our system that turn people into monsters from an ethical perspective. They do whatever it takes to stay close to the affair, creating a double life while they keep the marriage/children going, and spending time with the girlfriend.
And Kane, if you are trying to figure out whose story is truth - I can just tell you that the person in the affair rarely speaks the truth. Sorry. Hundreds of examples I saw, millions of lies. They can't help it because the nature of the relationship isn't something society accepts - so in the midst of all their brain chemical cocktail, they must make up stories to justify their affair. It always follows some sort of script that looks the same: Wife is crazy, wife doesn't understand me, I never loved wife, I've just stayed with her for the kids, I deserve happiness, girlfriend and I are soulmates (this is a biggie), wife is mean. It seems to be a complete surprise to the wife that he never loved her. Truth is he did - but then he fell in love with someone else.
Icky stuff. If you want any advice, I'm here for you. Sounds like you've chosen the path of silence and I hope that works for you. Smart to stay out of it, but be careful to stay close to your ethics. It's difficult to live with choices that aren't in-line with our ethics. Your wife is going to have a hard time with that concept of silence. Shame your friend put you in this position.
Learning some things that I didn't know about before this morning - I'm grateful.
Originally Posted by Br00ksie
Kane it does sound like ******. Where I'm from (Gullah culture) it's called "Hoodoo."
Interesting that it is being used in the context of divorce/infidelity though! I dunno if I believe in curses/hexes, but I do believe in bad/evil energy! I have personally experienced evil stuff that I can't explain!
Interesting that it is being used in the context of divorce/infidelity though! I dunno if I believe in curses/hexes, but I do believe in bad/evil energy! I have personally experienced evil stuff that I can't explain!
Not magic (I don't think at least) - brain chemistry. "Love" pumps all kinds of drugs into our system that turn people into monsters from an ethical perspective. They do whatever it takes to stay close to the affair, creating a double life while they keep the marriage/children going, and spending time with the girlfriend.
And Kane, if you are trying to figure out whose story is truth - I can just tell you that the person in the affair rarely speaks the truth. Sorry. Hundreds of examples I saw, millions of lies. They can't help it because the nature of the relationship isn't something society accepts - so in the midst of all their brain chemical cocktail, they must make up stories to justify their affair. It always follows some sort of script that looks the same: Wife is crazy, wife doesn't understand me, I never loved wife, I've just stayed with her for the kids, I deserve happiness, girlfriend and I are soulmates (this is a biggie), wife is mean. It seems to be a complete surprise to the wife that he never loved her. Truth is he did - but then he fell in love with someone else.
Icky stuff. If you want any advice, I'm here for you. Sounds like you've chosen the path of silence and I hope that works for you. Smart to stay out of it, but be careful to stay close to your ethics. It's difficult to live with choices that aren't in-line with our ethics. Your wife is going to have a hard time with that concept of silence. Shame your friend put you in this position.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 1,467
Hi all, sorry to hear about the creepy, weird boss situation Brooksie, there sure is some oddballs out there in this world! All that ******/Black magic stuff seems alien to me Kane but Im glad Ive not been involved in it (as far as I know!), I felt cursed many times with the alcohol! Hope your ankle gets better soon Grace. Need to get back into the exercise stuff this week too- it does seem to help my general mood.
Had a good day, went to a great early morning 'Living sober' meeting today and it really set me up for the day, related so much to what was said- a lot of it was about getting complacent in our sobriety and when we're happy and start getting our lives back on track and how easy it is to put life before recovery and let our guard down it certainly rang true for me.
Another thing that was said that I liked was the saying 'clear conscience soft pillow' meaning we sleep easier sober with no guilt! Had my girls then and a great day with them. Hope everyone has a great week.
Had a good day, went to a great early morning 'Living sober' meeting today and it really set me up for the day, related so much to what was said- a lot of it was about getting complacent in our sobriety and when we're happy and start getting our lives back on track and how easy it is to put life before recovery and let our guard down it certainly rang true for me.
Another thing that was said that I liked was the saying 'clear conscience soft pillow' meaning we sleep easier sober with no guilt! Had my girls then and a great day with them. Hope everyone has a great week.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
