One Year & Under Club Part 10
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Illinois
Posts: 397
Hi Undies, Grace hope the court hearing works out favorably to you. Got enough on your plate?! WWG glad to hear you had a sober WEEK, congrats. Hi, Midnight. Panacea, I fell over the holidays, too... and a few months leading up to it. But here we are, still alive.
mydee, I may be no angel anyway, but drunk I'm Evil. Got reminded of that several times, but still thought "I can control this." I can't, though.
Congrats on 30 Alice! I hope to see that mark soon, if I can just keep connected. Insane wears a normal mask, and I rarely if ever feel crazy.
Hope everyone has a sober day.
mydee, I may be no angel anyway, but drunk I'm Evil. Got reminded of that several times, but still thought "I can control this." I can't, though.
Congrats on 30 Alice! I hope to see that mark soon, if I can just keep connected. Insane wears a normal mask, and I rarely if ever feel crazy.
Hope everyone has a sober day.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,068
Hi there folks
Special welcome to Alice.Congratulations on your 30 days. A major accomplishment. Look forward to having here in our group.
A warm welcome to you Mydee, lovely to have you here and that was a thoughtful share for Pan.
Grace Hope you got the good news you all deserve. Thinking of you.x
Sober1ck Keep going, you're doing brilliantly.
Midnight ((hugs)) Hope you managed to get some decent sleep.
Something clicked at my meeting last night. I always try to please others which in turn can lead my to feeling rather stressed at times. So obvious, I know.....but really going to work on my honesty again. I always try to be honest but I have to also be honest with myself.
Being stressed and peolpe pleasing often led to a major drinking spree and we don't want that, no way!
Hope life is being kind to everyone today.
Take care
Catch you all a little later.
x
Special welcome to Alice.Congratulations on your 30 days. A major accomplishment. Look forward to having here in our group.
A warm welcome to you Mydee, lovely to have you here and that was a thoughtful share for Pan.
Grace Hope you got the good news you all deserve. Thinking of you.x
Sober1ck Keep going, you're doing brilliantly.
Midnight ((hugs)) Hope you managed to get some decent sleep.
Something clicked at my meeting last night. I always try to please others which in turn can lead my to feeling rather stressed at times. So obvious, I know.....but really going to work on my honesty again. I always try to be honest but I have to also be honest with myself.
Being stressed and peolpe pleasing often led to a major drinking spree and we don't want that, no way!
Hope life is being kind to everyone today.
Take care
Catch you all a little later.
x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: CA
Posts: 3,360
Morning All
I'm going to meet my younger sister on her lunch break today. I love her, however, she is always very full of anxiety over her job. So, I have to be careful to know I can't "fix" everything for her. Anyway, welcome to the new Undies, strength comes from the group.
Nicky: I so agree with you regarding honesty with ourselves.
Grace: fingers crossed regarding the hearing, ((hug))
Alice: congratulations 30 days!
WWG, Sober1ck, M.B., MyDee, TTBBP, Pan and everyone
Have a great day everyone
Bloss
I'm going to meet my younger sister on her lunch break today. I love her, however, she is always very full of anxiety over her job. So, I have to be careful to know I can't "fix" everything for her. Anyway, welcome to the new Undies, strength comes from the group.
Nicky: I so agree with you regarding honesty with ourselves.
Grace: fingers crossed regarding the hearing, ((hug))
Alice: congratulations 30 days!
WWG, Sober1ck, M.B., MyDee, TTBBP, Pan and everyone
Have a great day everyone
Bloss
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central New Jersey, USA
Posts: 1,345
Thoughts are with you Grace I hope it went (or is going) well.
Hello Pan. I'm sure others have said don't beat yourself up just back to it. Glad you are here.
Hello mydee - you are so right about the guilt. It takes strength to admit when we have failed and to get back to it as the guilt is crippling sometimes.
Alice - Hurray - So nice to see a December classmate here! Welcome! I warn you calling yourself and others "undies" does take a bit of getting used to at least it did for me - but now I do it on an almost daily basis. It's a great supportive group on this thread.
Nicky - I'm a people pleaser too. It is SO stressful because you cannot please all the people all the time and pleasing one person may anger another and its a vicious cycle and you tie yourself in knots. It is not bad to want to please others but ou need to stay true to yourself and find balance - even if you don't please all the people all the time.
WWG - Congrats on 7 days and your awesome wife!
BF - hope you are hanging in and that cough is better.
Sober1ck, MB, bloss, tanja and anyone I inadvertently omitted -have a wonderful day.
Hello Pan. I'm sure others have said don't beat yourself up just back to it. Glad you are here.
Hello mydee - you are so right about the guilt. It takes strength to admit when we have failed and to get back to it as the guilt is crippling sometimes.
Alice - Hurray - So nice to see a December classmate here! Welcome! I warn you calling yourself and others "undies" does take a bit of getting used to at least it did for me - but now I do it on an almost daily basis. It's a great supportive group on this thread.
Nicky - I'm a people pleaser too. It is SO stressful because you cannot please all the people all the time and pleasing one person may anger another and its a vicious cycle and you tie yourself in knots. It is not bad to want to please others but ou need to stay true to yourself and find balance - even if you don't please all the people all the time.
WWG - Congrats on 7 days and your awesome wife!
BF - hope you are hanging in and that cough is better.
Sober1ck, MB, bloss, tanja and anyone I inadvertently omitted -have a wonderful day.
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
18.00
Phew, what a day. I need a good strong cup of tea. The hearing stopped at 17.00. O's mother turned up, which was a bit of a surprise to say the least, The court hadn't arranged a translator as they were supposed to have done and her sister,who came with her translated on her behalf. His mum can't speak any English and hasn't made any attempt to learn any, she told the judge she wanted full responsibility of him, which was a turn up for the books. To cut a long story short the judge has asked for a statement from her and one from us re events that led O to being here. She asked for 4 months to do this and the judge told her he would give her 4 wks. Cathcass have 12 weeks to investigate her, where she lives, who she lives with etc and us. Our check will be easier and we've already had crb checks etc. There will then be another hearing in 12 wks!! Stressful day, but I've survived and I'll be staying sane and sober.
***********
Thanks for you kind wishes WWG and congratulations on a full week. I'm so glad you're wife is supporting you, that's a massive help.
Sober1ck, thank you too for your good wishes and yes I've got more than enough on my plate, I think I've got someone else's share of sh1t as well as my own! How many days are you up to now! You will get that 30 day milestone, you can do anything if you put your mind to it.
Thank you too Nicky and thanks for your ongoing support. I can relate so much to what you said in your post about always trying to please people, that is me too and it is something that I need to look at in myself.
Bloss, I hope you enjoyed your day with your sister, thanks for the hug, I was glad of it.
TTBABP and thank you for your kind thoughts, much appreciated. Another people pleaser, you're so right, it is impossible to please everyone all the time and we have to accept that. Easier said than done at times.
Anyway, I need to go and catch up.
See you all laters
Phew, what a day. I need a good strong cup of tea. The hearing stopped at 17.00. O's mother turned up, which was a bit of a surprise to say the least, The court hadn't arranged a translator as they were supposed to have done and her sister,who came with her translated on her behalf. His mum can't speak any English and hasn't made any attempt to learn any, she told the judge she wanted full responsibility of him, which was a turn up for the books. To cut a long story short the judge has asked for a statement from her and one from us re events that led O to being here. She asked for 4 months to do this and the judge told her he would give her 4 wks. Cathcass have 12 weeks to investigate her, where she lives, who she lives with etc and us. Our check will be easier and we've already had crb checks etc. There will then be another hearing in 12 wks!! Stressful day, but I've survived and I'll be staying sane and sober.
***********
Thanks for you kind wishes WWG and congratulations on a full week. I'm so glad you're wife is supporting you, that's a massive help.
Sober1ck, thank you too for your good wishes and yes I've got more than enough on my plate, I think I've got someone else's share of sh1t as well as my own! How many days are you up to now! You will get that 30 day milestone, you can do anything if you put your mind to it.
Thank you too Nicky and thanks for your ongoing support. I can relate so much to what you said in your post about always trying to please people, that is me too and it is something that I need to look at in myself.
Bloss, I hope you enjoyed your day with your sister, thanks for the hug, I was glad of it.
TTBABP and thank you for your kind thoughts, much appreciated. Another people pleaser, you're so right, it is impossible to please everyone all the time and we have to accept that. Easier said than done at times.
Anyway, I need to go and catch up.
See you all laters
Nothing Left to do but Smile.
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Upstate NY
Posts: 808
Hello Undies!
Tomorrow morning is my blood work. I'm not really too worried about the results, but I am more dreading not being able to eat tonight. I was going to try to pull off a run tonight too. Hopefully I don't pass out on my way home. Gotta take advantage of those briefly mild winter days when you can.
My friend came up this weekend to go w/ me to a concert. I felt sort of left out with everyone drinking, but felt much better after the second set when most of the drinkers looked like they were about to pass out.
I am just about to hit 8 months and it has been so nice hearing so many people tell me how great I've looked lately. I have even had a few people not say anything to me, but do a double take on me when they see me. It sure helps with how low alcohol had taken my confidence. 8 months ago, I couldn't even look anyone in the eyes because my eyes were so bloodshot all the time. Combine that w/ being constantly bloated and depressed and you have all the makings of an introvert. I am still trying to regain my sociability w/o alcohol. Is anyone else struggling with this?
Welcome back Pan.
Tomorrow morning is my blood work. I'm not really too worried about the results, but I am more dreading not being able to eat tonight. I was going to try to pull off a run tonight too. Hopefully I don't pass out on my way home. Gotta take advantage of those briefly mild winter days when you can.
My friend came up this weekend to go w/ me to a concert. I felt sort of left out with everyone drinking, but felt much better after the second set when most of the drinkers looked like they were about to pass out.
I am just about to hit 8 months and it has been so nice hearing so many people tell me how great I've looked lately. I have even had a few people not say anything to me, but do a double take on me when they see me. It sure helps with how low alcohol had taken my confidence. 8 months ago, I couldn't even look anyone in the eyes because my eyes were so bloodshot all the time. Combine that w/ being constantly bloated and depressed and you have all the makings of an introvert. I am still trying to regain my sociability w/o alcohol. Is anyone else struggling with this?
Welcome back Pan.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,068
Grace What a day! Really hope it all turns out for the best.
Duane Yes yes and yes. I did initially struggle with the socialising aspect but not sure when it stopped bothering me but it no longer is an issue now. (almost 11months) I used to envy others drinking and wish it was me or I'd be the first to leave a function. These days I seem to be one of the last......haha So I guess *this too shall pass*
Glad you enjoyed the concert and good luck with your bloods. Keep us posted.
Bloss After posting about people pleasing I did it again! It's so hard to change at times.
x
Duane Yes yes and yes. I did initially struggle with the socialising aspect but not sure when it stopped bothering me but it no longer is an issue now. (almost 11months) I used to envy others drinking and wish it was me or I'd be the first to leave a function. These days I seem to be one of the last......haha So I guess *this too shall pass*
Glad you enjoyed the concert and good luck with your bloods. Keep us posted.
Bloss After posting about people pleasing I did it again! It's so hard to change at times.
x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: CA
Posts: 3,360
Tuesday afternoon @ 2:45 P.M.
The visit with my sister was fine, she was less anxious today. I already mentioned this on the May Thread-- I had a brief thought of a drink, but it passed quickly. The store was really displaying the alcohol over the top. First thing that came to mind was SR and all who post, as well as the consequences of drinking.
Now, I'm going to drop off some dry cleaning, pick up my C.S.A. produce, walk Blossom then prepare dinner.
Nicky: I hear you about the people pleasing. Everytime I would get home from any sort of function, I would rethink things I said and worry if I said the wrong thing, or hurt someone's feelings. This is one of my patterns, I am working on changing since I became sober.
Duane: Good on you almost 8 months, I think all of us look better when we stop poisoning ourselves with huge (in my case) amounts of alcohol.
Have a good afternoon and evening everyone
Bloss
The visit with my sister was fine, she was less anxious today. I already mentioned this on the May Thread-- I had a brief thought of a drink, but it passed quickly. The store was really displaying the alcohol over the top. First thing that came to mind was SR and all who post, as well as the consequences of drinking.
Now, I'm going to drop off some dry cleaning, pick up my C.S.A. produce, walk Blossom then prepare dinner.
Nicky: I hear you about the people pleasing. Everytime I would get home from any sort of function, I would rethink things I said and worry if I said the wrong thing, or hurt someone's feelings. This is one of my patterns, I am working on changing since I became sober.
Duane: Good on you almost 8 months, I think all of us look better when we stop poisoning ourselves with huge (in my case) amounts of alcohol.
Have a good afternoon and evening everyone
Bloss
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
Quick Hi
Thanks Bloss, fingers crossed. Everything crossed. Glad your meeting with your sister went well. It seems like quite a few of us are people pleasers. I do that to, rethink conversations etc.
Duane, good luck with the bloods, but I bet they're are no where near as bad as you imagine, you will have improved dramatically now you're off the evil booze.
I struggled with sociability at the beginning but it's getting easier by the day.
Thanks Nicky, we're fairly confident, but don't want to be too confident as you just never know. Love your new avatar.
Off to bed now
Night night, sleep well.
Thanks Bloss, fingers crossed. Everything crossed. Glad your meeting with your sister went well. It seems like quite a few of us are people pleasers. I do that to, rethink conversations etc.
Duane, good luck with the bloods, but I bet they're are no where near as bad as you imagine, you will have improved dramatically now you're off the evil booze.
I struggled with sociability at the beginning but it's getting easier by the day.
Thanks Nicky, we're fairly confident, but don't want to be too confident as you just never know. Love your new avatar.
Off to bed now
Night night, sleep well.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 1,068
Almost Midnight
I just can't seem to stick to any of my plans to change at the moment.
One was to lay off the computer at 10pm, failed miserably tonight and the other as you know was to stop trying to please everyone, total fail today. Nevermind there's always tomorrow.
bloss I'm sorry you had a brief thought about alcohol. Personally I think a brief thought is something I'm getting used to but as long as I don't dwell on it too long and allow it to turn into an idea then I would be doomed. Never the less it does un-nerve me when it happens. Thanks for sharing that and getting it out in the open. Well done for dismissing it straight away. :ghug3
I just can't seem to stick to any of my plans to change at the moment.
One was to lay off the computer at 10pm, failed miserably tonight and the other as you know was to stop trying to please everyone, total fail today. Nevermind there's always tomorrow.
bloss I'm sorry you had a brief thought about alcohol. Personally I think a brief thought is something I'm getting used to but as long as I don't dwell on it too long and allow it to turn into an idea then I would be doomed. Never the less it does un-nerve me when it happens. Thanks for sharing that and getting it out in the open. Well done for dismissing it straight away. :ghug3
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central New Jersey, USA
Posts: 1,345
Grace - so glad you are through it. Rest easy now for a bit. I am sorry though that you will still be fightinh this fight. Enjoy every moment of peace that you have.
Bloss- I still on a daily basis go over things I have said to people worrying that I have offended someone. Its a terrible way to live. We all need to learn that what is done is done and stop second guessing ourselves all the time.
duane - I still stuggle with soical aspects of not drinking. I tey not to be too hard on myself in hopes that it does get easier with time.
Nicky - don't you be hard on yourself either. Tackle life changes in small steps.
Goodnight all you Undies.
Bloss- I still on a daily basis go over things I have said to people worrying that I have offended someone. Its a terrible way to live. We all need to learn that what is done is done and stop second guessing ourselves all the time.
duane - I still stuggle with soical aspects of not drinking. I tey not to be too hard on myself in hopes that it does get easier with time.
Nicky - don't you be hard on yourself either. Tackle life changes in small steps.
Goodnight all you Undies.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: SE USA
Posts: 941
Hello Underful Undies,
Thank you all again for the well wishes and welcome backs. You are a good group! Grace - I am sorry things were so stressful for you - it should be a crime for anyone to stress you out.
Duane - good luck on the check up! It is amazing how much better our bodies do without the massive daily doses of alcohol. It still amazes me the amount of pain I intentionally inflicted upon my self with the booze. Despite my fall from the sobriety truck - I feel so much better now than when I first started this journey in late August.
Nicky/Bloss - I am getting in the ever expanding line of people pleasers. I am like a slightly insane Labrador when it comes to praise and wanting to please.
Must get back to work - take care all. Pan
Thank you all again for the well wishes and welcome backs. You are a good group! Grace - I am sorry things were so stressful for you - it should be a crime for anyone to stress you out.
Duane - good luck on the check up! It is amazing how much better our bodies do without the massive daily doses of alcohol. It still amazes me the amount of pain I intentionally inflicted upon my self with the booze. Despite my fall from the sobriety truck - I feel so much better now than when I first started this journey in late August.
Nicky/Bloss - I am getting in the ever expanding line of people pleasers. I am like a slightly insane Labrador when it comes to praise and wanting to please.
Must get back to work - take care all. Pan
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,977
Hi undies! Busy day yesterday. Today I have my aunts funeral to go to so another day of missing work. Also. My dogs knee was acting funny so I shot some x rays and sent them to a surgical specialist. She's going to have her knee joint tapped Thursday and see what type of cells are causing inflammation. She could end up needing surgery which is $5,000!!! So if that's the case I will have to figure out how to come up with that money. It's like one thing after the next lately but trying to stay positive. Feeling better from my nasty cold, still have a bit of a lingering cough.
Welcome to our new undies!
Grace hope everything works out for you with court!
Welcome to our new undies!
Grace hope everything works out for you with court!
Member
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cheshire, N.W England
Posts: 6,803
Good morning Undies
Another new day and the last working one for me this week, well working in here anyway. I managed to get a half decent sleep last night, all things considered and I'm okay.
Nicky, you're not on your own their, my best laid plans always go to pot, ie. nothing ever goes to plan! Have you seen how many of us are people pleasers? I think maybe we need to set up a new board on how to be assertive and how to say no!
Bloss, I'm guessing we all have brief thoughts of alcohol now and again, how could we not when it's all around us wherever we go, we're only human, and as long as it's only thoughts and not actions we can let them go over our heads.
TTBABP, thank you for that, I appreciate it, it was a horrible day and the court hearing was shambolic, but that's another long story. At the end of the day its the little boys welfare that is paramount in all this and we have to do what is best for him.
Thanks Pan, I'm feeling much better today, stress has always been my big trigger and previously all this stress would have sent me over the edge, but now I'm much more rational.
How are you doing Pan?
Going to do a bit of work now and once again thanks for all your support.
*****
JUST FOR TODAY, I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.
Another new day and the last working one for me this week, well working in here anyway. I managed to get a half decent sleep last night, all things considered and I'm okay.
Nicky, you're not on your own their, my best laid plans always go to pot, ie. nothing ever goes to plan! Have you seen how many of us are people pleasers? I think maybe we need to set up a new board on how to be assertive and how to say no!
Bloss, I'm guessing we all have brief thoughts of alcohol now and again, how could we not when it's all around us wherever we go, we're only human, and as long as it's only thoughts and not actions we can let them go over our heads.
TTBABP, thank you for that, I appreciate it, it was a horrible day and the court hearing was shambolic, but that's another long story. At the end of the day its the little boys welfare that is paramount in all this and we have to do what is best for him.
Thanks Pan, I'm feeling much better today, stress has always been my big trigger and previously all this stress would have sent me over the edge, but now I'm much more rational.
How are you doing Pan?
Going to do a bit of work now and once again thanks for all your support.
*****
JUST FOR TODAY, I will refrain from improving anybody but myself.
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