One Year and Over Club- Part 7
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
One Year and Over Club- Part 7
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Do you guys still live in the same places you did when you were drinking, still drive past the spots where you used to buy booze or score dope? I do. My first couple of months sober, I avoided those places. Then for a while I felt this kind of bitter triumph. Now I just drive by and feel really grateful. No envy, no indignation. Just gratitude to be driving by on a hot, lazy Sunday afternoon.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
I moved towns, so no...but I was such a drinker there are still places in *this* town I remember (or don't remember)....
I rarely think about it now...which is good really, I think
D
I rarely think about it now...which is good really, I think
D
In my Own Little World
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Champaign, IL
Posts: 368
Welcome Piotr!
I had some really sad...discouraging news today...I will tell more about it tomorrow morning. I am still processing all of it and how I fit into it (or don't). Trying to not have guilt, either.
More tomorrow - bed now.
I had some really sad...discouraging news today...I will tell more about it tomorrow morning. I am still processing all of it and how I fit into it (or don't). Trying to not have guilt, either.
More tomorrow - bed now.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 1,474
Welcome Piotr!
LB I hope things are not too bad hun.
Ok...so I have an interview for the job that sounds really positive on Thursday and they told me it will be a panel interview with 3 interviewers. YIKES!!!!!! Trying to keep calm and believe in myself and my abilities and not get freaked out about trying to impress not 1 but 3 people. Sheesh! I will be fine, I will be fine, I will be fine....no I will ROCK that interview. (did you believe that? Fake it til you make it right).
LB I hope things are not too bad hun.
Ok...so I have an interview for the job that sounds really positive on Thursday and they told me it will be a panel interview with 3 interviewers. YIKES!!!!!! Trying to keep calm and believe in myself and my abilities and not get freaked out about trying to impress not 1 but 3 people. Sheesh! I will be fine, I will be fine, I will be fine....no I will ROCK that interview. (did you believe that? Fake it til you make it right).
instant
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 5,711
A busy day with plenty of work related dramas and stresses. At times it's like I'm the only adult!! (LOL). It is good to know that even if it does get bad and there is "reason" enough to drink- I won't.
I do hear some interesting comments about peoples drinking on the weekend- I am so thankful to be free of it all
I do hear some interesting comments about peoples drinking on the weekend- I am so thankful to be free of it all
Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 2,826
Morning Overs! Welcome Piotr!
LB, share when you can, sending peaceful vibes.
GOOD LUCK MANZ! You ROCK! You'll do great.
Starting Monday morning pre-dawn ready to go for a walk. Starting the day with exercise because the mornings I do, I feel better all day long. Short work week for me because husband and I go to Maine Thursday morning. Woot!
Had bad dreams last night about being overlooked and ignored. Cultivating a feeling of gratitude and safety.
Did anyone see the opinion article in the New York Times called The Anxious Idiot? It's about living with Anxiety by cultivating and acting on healthy habits rather than anxious habits. It's really speaking to me as a part of my Recovery.
Have a good day/night!
LB, share when you can, sending peaceful vibes.
GOOD LUCK MANZ! You ROCK! You'll do great.
Starting Monday morning pre-dawn ready to go for a walk. Starting the day with exercise because the mornings I do, I feel better all day long. Short work week for me because husband and I go to Maine Thursday morning. Woot!
Had bad dreams last night about being overlooked and ignored. Cultivating a feeling of gratitude and safety.
Did anyone see the opinion article in the New York Times called The Anxious Idiot? It's about living with Anxiety by cultivating and acting on healthy habits rather than anxious habits. It's really speaking to me as a part of my Recovery.
Have a good day/night!
SoberOutlook
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3,089
Sorry about your struggles, LB. I hope it all turns out better than expected.
Good luck on the interview, Manz! Did they happen to say if it is a behavioral based interview (BBI)? Panel interviews often are. It only means they want examples from your work life on situations they specify. "Tell me about a time when you had to act against your personal will in your job; what did you do; how did it turn out?" Stuff like that. If it is a BBI, there's tons of stuff you can research on the net. Just google BBI STAR method. I had a BBI a couple weeks ago, but haven't heard anything yet. Unfortunately, I don't usually perform well on BBIs, but most folks do. Good luck!
Full weekend for me. It didn't all go as I'd like, but here I am, and reasonably well-rested. I got a lot of great exercise, which is my goal for year two: get and stay in shape, physically, mentally, emotionally. I'm not expecting miracles, just progress.
Have a great week, Overs!
Good luck on the interview, Manz! Did they happen to say if it is a behavioral based interview (BBI)? Panel interviews often are. It only means they want examples from your work life on situations they specify. "Tell me about a time when you had to act against your personal will in your job; what did you do; how did it turn out?" Stuff like that. If it is a BBI, there's tons of stuff you can research on the net. Just google BBI STAR method. I had a BBI a couple weeks ago, but haven't heard anything yet. Unfortunately, I don't usually perform well on BBIs, but most folks do. Good luck!
Full weekend for me. It didn't all go as I'd like, but here I am, and reasonably well-rested. I got a lot of great exercise, which is my goal for year two: get and stay in shape, physically, mentally, emotionally. I'm not expecting miracles, just progress.
Have a great week, Overs!
Journey of Recovery
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Posts: 621
Welcome Piotr and congratulations on your 1 year! Glad to have you here with us!
Good luck on Thursday manz. You'll do great!
LB, ****{hugs}}}
R&A I live in the town I drank in. There are bars here I have drank in. I definitely feel gratitude not to be in them. As far as where I bought it, I got it in the grocery store where the liquor and wine was in the produce and the beer was in the pop aisle. I just got what I needed and kept on moving. They recently rearranged the store where it is set up differently.
frances, have a good time in Maine!
Good luck on Thursday manz. You'll do great!
LB, ****{hugs}}}
R&A I live in the town I drank in. There are bars here I have drank in. I definitely feel gratitude not to be in them. As far as where I bought it, I got it in the grocery store where the liquor and wine was in the produce and the beer was in the pop aisle. I just got what I needed and kept on moving. They recently rearranged the store where it is set up differently.
frances, have a good time in Maine!
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,782
Good morning overs! I go by the drive thru where I used to get my wine every day. The only thing I feel is gratitude and happiness that I'm no longer drinking.
I'm enjoying a more peaceful life now that my two kids have their drivers licenses. No more playing taxi, no more interruptions to my day, no more demands... sure feels good!
I go by the drive thru where I used to get my wine every day. The only thing I feel is gratitude and happiness that I'm no longer drinking.I'm enjoying a more peaceful life now that my two kids have their drivers licenses.
No more playing taxi, no more interruptions to my day, no more demands... sure feels good!
In my Own Little World
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Champaign, IL
Posts: 368
Manz!!! You'll do GREAT I know!!
Fake it till you make it on the interview?! You bet your rearend!!! I have so little self-confidence, I had to. You, girl? You got it! Freaking rock it!
I met with my ex-husband's sister and found out that their mom (my mother in law...err ex) has apparently become a raging alcoholic since her father (who I called grandpa) passed away two years ago. She was always so wonderful, bright, loving, and hated alcohol because her first AND second husbands were alcoholics and it practically destroyed their families. I loved her just as much if not more than my mom for the longest time. She is the one that told me to get away from my ex because of how much he verbally abused me, etc. in front of them...which I never even at the time realized.
The kick in the gut after the kick in the pants? She is drinking what my ex and I drank when she can't afford vodka - Milwaukee's Best Ice.
None of the family will do anything with her because she always shows up drunk to everything, she doesn't do anything with her only grandkid anymore, if she does go to family functions she is hostile. When she isn't drinking, she works ~80 hours a week to pay for the alcohol.
It's so tragic...it broke my heart.
The silver lining is that apparently my ex has calmed down on his drinking when hesaw what it did to his mom. Supposedly only drinks "once a week now". He was drinking anywhere from a 12 to a 24 pack each and every night.
It was such a sobering conversation....just broke me.
She started drinking pretty heavy when the ex and I split up in 2009. Then grandpa died summer of 2010. I was trying to feel if I had a part in that and what it was....especially since her 2nd drink of choice was what we always drank. I realized last night, though, that I can't take responsibility for others actions no matter how similar their choices are. I can only control me, right here right now.
On the flip side...I am extremely grateful that my ex is doing better with his drinking. I know we can't take responsibility for other people's drinking, but I did. His drinking escalated to astronomical proportions once we moved in together when I was 18. I always carried around such incredible guilt, feeling like I forced his hand in the issue. I did a lot. I would throw a fit and make his life a hell if he didn't go to the store and buy us a 12 pack (since I was underage). This was every night. I remember at one point him then calling me an alcoholic and how he didn't know if he wanted to be with me, etc. I always thought....he's right. He would have been better off.
I know on the surface I can't accept responsibility for that. He allowed himself to partake and I didn't force him to guzzle all those beers, all those years. Finding out he's doing better (even though he's not "quit") has given ME a little peace in my heart.
Ok - enough introspection this early in the morning on only three hours of sleep. I've given myself a headache.
Thank you all for the concern. It really is so much appreciated. ♥
I hope everyone had a good weekend. It is getting crunch time for me now with the move. Ugh!
Fake it till you make it on the interview?! You bet your rearend!!! I have so little self-confidence, I had to. You, girl? You got it! Freaking rock it!
I met with my ex-husband's sister and found out that their mom (my mother in law...err ex) has apparently become a raging alcoholic since her father (who I called grandpa) passed away two years ago. She was always so wonderful, bright, loving, and hated alcohol because her first AND second husbands were alcoholics and it practically destroyed their families. I loved her just as much if not more than my mom for the longest time. She is the one that told me to get away from my ex because of how much he verbally abused me, etc. in front of them...which I never even at the time realized.
The kick in the gut after the kick in the pants? She is drinking what my ex and I drank when she can't afford vodka - Milwaukee's Best Ice.
None of the family will do anything with her because she always shows up drunk to everything, she doesn't do anything with her only grandkid anymore, if she does go to family functions she is hostile. When she isn't drinking, she works ~80 hours a week to pay for the alcohol.
It's so tragic...it broke my heart.
The silver lining is that apparently my ex has calmed down on his drinking when hesaw what it did to his mom. Supposedly only drinks "once a week now". He was drinking anywhere from a 12 to a 24 pack each and every night.
It was such a sobering conversation....just broke me.
She started drinking pretty heavy when the ex and I split up in 2009. Then grandpa died summer of 2010. I was trying to feel if I had a part in that and what it was....especially since her 2nd drink of choice was what we always drank. I realized last night, though, that I can't take responsibility for others actions no matter how similar their choices are. I can only control me, right here right now.
On the flip side...I am extremely grateful that my ex is doing better with his drinking. I know we can't take responsibility for other people's drinking, but I did. His drinking escalated to astronomical proportions once we moved in together when I was 18. I always carried around such incredible guilt, feeling like I forced his hand in the issue. I did a lot. I would throw a fit and make his life a hell if he didn't go to the store and buy us a 12 pack (since I was underage). This was every night. I remember at one point him then calling me an alcoholic and how he didn't know if he wanted to be with me, etc. I always thought....he's right. He would have been better off.
I know on the surface I can't accept responsibility for that. He allowed himself to partake and I didn't force him to guzzle all those beers, all those years. Finding out he's doing better (even though he's not "quit") has given ME a little peace in my heart.
Ok - enough introspection this early in the morning on only three hours of sleep. I've given myself a headache.
Thank you all for the concern. It really is so much appreciated. ♥
I hope everyone had a good weekend. It is getting crunch time for me now with the move. Ugh!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 4,451
Really sorry to hear that, LB. I hope she comes around, decides to pull herself out of that pit.
Not under the surface either. Everyone is the captain of their own ship, ya know?
I know on the surface I can't accept responsibility for that
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Amen R&A!
LB as long as you feel others, not you, are responsible for your adult decisions, you will also think that you are for others. It is a fundamental to growth and adulthood that many never learn. You are learning.
Good luck Manz.
LB as long as you feel others, not you, are responsible for your adult decisions, you will also think that you are for others. It is a fundamental to growth and adulthood that many never learn. You are learning.
Good luck Manz.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Baltic coast
Posts: 1,371
Thank you for the warm welcome everyone.
Almost every store sells booze here, so at the beginning I had problems with doing basic shopping. Still now, especially when I'm having a bad day or am in a crisis, it still is unnerving to go grocery shopping and walk past the alcohol isle. I usually turn my head the other way just to not see it.
Had a drinking dream recently so I upped my AA meetings - went to 4 last week.
Finally made up my mind and booked my stay at an AA convention in Holland.
Feel sort of anxious about it but I could use a break and am not ready yet for a "normal" holiday with everyone boozing around me.
Almost every store sells booze here, so at the beginning I had problems with doing basic shopping. Still now, especially when I'm having a bad day or am in a crisis, it still is unnerving to go grocery shopping and walk past the alcohol isle. I usually turn my head the other way just to not see it.
Had a drinking dream recently so I upped my AA meetings - went to 4 last week.
Finally made up my mind and booked my stay at an AA convention in Holland.
Feel sort of anxious about it but I could use a break and am not ready yet for a "normal" holiday with everyone boozing around me.
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