Introvrtd1

The first several weeks were a rollercoaster ride of moods, feelings, ups, and downs….After about six months, things pretty much leveled off well…

Then there’s that occasional dip. That event most fear might come…I admit without wanting to think about it, I denied any possibility of peaks n valleys. The past week has been just that….dips in the level road I was on for the last few months…

Felt good not worried about the anxiety, paws, depression, or other physical symptoms that normally disrupts living life to the fullest.

Anyway, just as before…I know this will pass….I been here before…I often think about taking that drink….that one night binge I miss so much… Until this reality kicked in, I can now think about how much worse it would be if I was drinking…might be fun and uneventful after a night or two, but that would quickly turn into a week binge, followed by a nasty recovery.

All this to say…ups and downs occur…putting them in perspective is the thing I should focus on to remain stable.

Astro

This is one of the many truths about recovery, about antidepressants, about life, and I'm finding out it applies to diets too. It's a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs, and often it's also compared to a heart monitor, those peaks and valleys as you mentioned. And quite honestly if it wasn't so erratic it probably would be pretty boring and we'd tire of that too, right?

This is why I enjoy sobriety so much, the craziness and excitement, the down times when I can rest in my recovery and my religious beliefs. It's rarely boring and for the most part I rest in knowing that no matter what it will probably change quickly and I'm off on another part of the journey. It's been a good while since I was prescribed SSRI's but I've never forgotten that part of my story.

And when it comes to taking a drink again....I don't think I ever want to go down that road again, the fun wouldn't last long.

Introvrtd1

I hear ya on that!

KTB5000

Thanks for posting on this anxiousrock. I just had AD dose increased, and it's been just a week and feeling a little better. For the past 2 week before that, i was struggling. I couldn't muster up the energy to do anything but the basics. Agreeing with Astro, it is just this intricate mesh of creating and sustaining some balance in all areas of life. On my good days, it's exciting. On bad days, I feel overwhelmed and anxious.

Today was good day, I watched my sons' football practice for 2 hours this morning. I could never imagine being able to do this while drinking, my anxiety would be unbearable. Overall, I can see and feel the improvement over the past couple months being free from alcohol, though I still struggle with mental health daily.

KTB5000

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Introvrtd1

Too bad this med doesn’t work the minute it’s taken, like a painkiller does… I usually get a lift within the first hour or two after taking my morning dose, but find later in the day how that ‘lift’ seems to ‘dip’, sending me on that rollercoaster.

Of all my other meds, this one is most bizarre…Can I say how I hate having it modify my brain chemistry, although in a good way, it’s still a two edged sword…

Taking the good with the bad is a benefit of all things in life I guess…Just glad the good outweighs the bad mostly, but there is that ‘balance’ to life.

I ramble through my anxiety….post here in the wee hours of the night….and in spite of a house full of family members, theres still that degree of ‘loneliness’ in the house…Sometimes I post things here I don’t even tell my family…Not that they don’t care, but it’s kinda hard to explain.



Thanks for reading.

dustyfox

Hi introvrtd - I know what you mean about posting things here that you may not tell your family

-It's a very personal thing to many of us - recovery is painful to discuss and it is easier to do it here with those who have similar lived experiences of addiction and all the issues that go with it.

I do hope you gain some solace from knowing there are others who read what you have written and understand.

least

I've been on antiD's (Zoloft) for years and am glad to be on them. They keep my mood from falling too low and keep me on an even keel. I am grateful to have them in my mental health arsenal.

Zencat

Hi Intro

I've been on SSRI medication with Neurontin, Trazodone for years. I also have been in behavioral counseling for years. All that dose help with managing my mood. I know the ups and downs even with med's. Yes the side effects are strange sometimes for me too. I hope you can adjust to your medication like I have.

Remember: harmful substances can counter the effects of your med's and can exasperate mental illness symptoms.

Introvrtd1

Turns out my blood pressure was up this week….no wonder I was feeling crappy.

Im on meds but my diet lately hasn’t been the best…sugar, sugar, sugar…for me that’ll do it for sure.

Astro

I'm on a mostly sugar free diet once again, and it's been a huge reminder of how much sugar and carbs effect my blood pressure, heart rate, and inflammation. I'm feeling almost 100% improved after 3 months of very low sugar intake.

Introvrtd1

I hear ya…..

RunningScared

I need to post an update on my original post about my depression. I am really good at procrastination.

A lot of people don't realize that SSRIs are only effective 40% to 60% of the time. Many people have serious side effects causing them to stop, especially sexual side effects for men. This also effects some women.

I'm lucky that SSRIs have worked extremely well for me for a good part of my life. Only recently did I become treatment resistant. (I'm 64).

Anyway, I had TMS treatment number 17 today and it appears to be helping. There will be 34 treatments in total. I'm waiting for the dip that many people have. For anyone looking into this, reddit has a couple of TMS groups, and so does Fbook.

Introvrtd1

Hi RunningScared….I’ll be 59 this year…seems the older I get, the less I can handle indulgences like sugar and high carbs. Never thought I’d be taking antidepressants though…besides high blood pressure and cholesterol meds, just the thought that I’m getting old is scary enough.

Already reserved myself to the bp meds, but not sure how long I wanna be on these ad’s.

Introvrtd1

My evening hot showers seem to always lift my mood slightly and calm me a bit…. There may actually be something to this.

Astro

Totally agree with you on that one! I used to take long walks, then come home and soak in a hot bath and that helped with lifting my spirits and I also slept much better.