This is one of the many truths about recovery, about antidepressants, about life, and I'm finding out it applies to diets too. It's a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs, and often it's also compared to a heart monitor, those peaks and valleys as you mentioned. And quite honestly if it wasn't so erratic it probably would be pretty boring and we'd tire of that too, right?
This is why I enjoy sobriety so much, the craziness and excitement, the down times when I can rest in my recovery and my religious beliefs. It's rarely boring and for the most part I rest in knowing that no matter what it will probably change quickly and I'm off on another part of the journey. It's been a good while since I was prescribed SSRI's but I've never forgotten that part of my story.
And when it comes to taking a drink again....I don't think I ever want to go down that road again, the fun wouldn't last long.