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He rang. I automatically hit decline on the call.
Talked to Scott about it a bit later. I can't imagine having a phone conversation. Clueless for any words. When you don't have trust you don't have anything and I would never trust him again. We would talk, he called me his confidante, for a couple of hours sometimes. He knew my soft spots and twisted them into bizarre, ugly, disgusting things. He took terrible advantage of me in the most personal of ways & in that with knowing me. In my mind, it is psychological and emotional battery.
I am sure he has exes, women who were very invested, some also drank, and I know how it can go. Ya walk on eggshells then make up. So, he has been waiting for me to get over it and just pick up as before. But for me that simply isn't possible. no difference if he was blackout drunk or stone sober...it happened.
I do continue to have compassion for him but need to do some work around that.
Too hot to cook or eat hot food. Scott polished off the tuna salad and that makes me proud. I know something he likes! lol. more on its way. I have boiled eggs leftover and might to deviled eggs tomorrow.
Talked to Scott about it a bit later. I can't imagine having a phone conversation. Clueless for any words. When you don't have trust you don't have anything and I would never trust him again. We would talk, he called me his confidante, for a couple of hours sometimes. He knew my soft spots and twisted them into bizarre, ugly, disgusting things. He took terrible advantage of me in the most personal of ways & in that with knowing me. In my mind, it is psychological and emotional battery.
I am sure he has exes, women who were very invested, some also drank, and I know how it can go. Ya walk on eggshells then make up. So, he has been waiting for me to get over it and just pick up as before. But for me that simply isn't possible. no difference if he was blackout drunk or stone sober...it happened.
I do continue to have compassion for him but need to do some work around that.
Too hot to cook or eat hot food. Scott polished off the tuna salad and that makes me proud. I know something he likes! lol. more on its way. I have boiled eggs leftover and might to deviled eggs tomorrow.
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He has also sent me a message that the local Long John Silver's has closed permanently.
This is like fishing. Literally. He throws out a shiny nibble for me to bite and then he reels me in. Yes, it is exactly like that.
Formerly this would have been a topic of conversation. Remember that we are both foodies and LJS was one of our favorite splurges.
I hope some day he will message me that he has seen an attorney. But I know to the depths of my being that I cannot help encourage that. I gave it all I had.
I am still torqued off that he wouldn't take 5 minutes to come pick up his dinner. Because it typified his M.O. across the board and yes, I was personally offended. But I also know that he cut off his nose to spite his face. Seems he does that a lot. And I know well from reading around here and being reminded that it is not about me. This is about him.
I really have no hopes at all that he will experience the gift of desperation. He has been at that crossroads many, many times. I don't wish him ill, I am just calling it as I see it.
and keeping a record.
This heat is killer. no inclination to cook at all.
Perhaps it is on my mind because I see a dear friend of mine is going to date someone that I see many red flags with.
Sending out hopes and intentions of peace for all here.
This is like fishing. Literally. He throws out a shiny nibble for me to bite and then he reels me in. Yes, it is exactly like that.
Formerly this would have been a topic of conversation. Remember that we are both foodies and LJS was one of our favorite splurges.
I hope some day he will message me that he has seen an attorney. But I know to the depths of my being that I cannot help encourage that. I gave it all I had.
I am still torqued off that he wouldn't take 5 minutes to come pick up his dinner. Because it typified his M.O. across the board and yes, I was personally offended. But I also know that he cut off his nose to spite his face. Seems he does that a lot. And I know well from reading around here and being reminded that it is not about me. This is about him.
I really have no hopes at all that he will experience the gift of desperation. He has been at that crossroads many, many times. I don't wish him ill, I am just calling it as I see it.
and keeping a record.
This heat is killer. no inclination to cook at all.
Perhaps it is on my mind because I see a dear friend of mine is going to date someone that I see many red flags with.
Sending out hopes and intentions of peace for all here.
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About a decade ago. My sister would get off work, go on the balcony and start her nightly beer drinking. She would call to chat. It wouldn't take long before I could hear that she was drunk. Over enunciating her words and repeating herself. And I just wanted off the phone then.
I spoke to my psychiatrist about it. Saying I didn't know if I could talk with her when she was drunk. He told me immediately that he would never encourage me to do so. That validation has and continues to be important to me.
Now it is my daughter whom I have often been estranged from. I am changing the dynamics. I guess we are both upset with each other. The difference is that I am willing to apologize when needed. She is not.
She messaged me a passive aggressive bit. and then talked about an event she was proud of. She is used to me being her biggest cheerleader. I knew that she was on her veranda drinking. I told her that I wasn't chatty because I had been sick to my stomach for the last couple of days. I know she thought I was lying and just dodging her. I wasn't. I was sick.
And she also owes me an apology for blowing up at me the time before.
I haven't felt like contacting her.
I don't have a problem with casual social drinking. I have a small bottle of wine that I drink hanging out with Scott watching music videos about once a month. about 3 glasses.
I spoke to my psychiatrist about it. Saying I didn't know if I could talk with her when she was drunk. He told me immediately that he would never encourage me to do so. That validation has and continues to be important to me.
Now it is my daughter whom I have often been estranged from. I am changing the dynamics. I guess we are both upset with each other. The difference is that I am willing to apologize when needed. She is not.
She messaged me a passive aggressive bit. and then talked about an event she was proud of. She is used to me being her biggest cheerleader. I knew that she was on her veranda drinking. I told her that I wasn't chatty because I had been sick to my stomach for the last couple of days. I know she thought I was lying and just dodging her. I wasn't. I was sick.
And she also owes me an apology for blowing up at me the time before.
I haven't felt like contacting her.
I don't have a problem with casual social drinking. I have a small bottle of wine that I drink hanging out with Scott watching music videos about once a month. about 3 glasses.
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Not missing L or the other neighborhood drunk guy. L has stopped messaging me.
My daughter has been doing a huge amount of canning, baking, freezing etc from their gigantic gardens. They want to grow all their own food organically.
First day she sent me photos and we messaged. Some of my best, fondest memories are from doing the same with my kids when they were youngins.
A couple days later more of the same and then we chatted on the phone. In text she thanked me for bringing her up doing this in our family. That is huge, she never wants to give me credit.
And it was during the day when she hadn't had a drink.
I was able to share some of my memories with her. some about her and her brother when they were young. what it was like canning back when we didn't have a/c in the kitchen and a funny story about my mom.
Still doing my basic meditations. It is beyond amazing how much time monk practioners have spent but the book says even a much lesser amount benefits the brain and the person. so I will continue to be a slow learner and that is okay.
It is too hot to cook much or even have an appetite. I did get some thin sliced chicken breasts, pounded them with the meat tenderizer. why? I dunno, I just like that thing lol. mixed up egg/milk in a bowl and a plate of flour liberally salted and peppered. Did a double dip...putting them thro eggs and flour twice then pan fried them. was yummy and I was wanting seconds.
My daughter has been doing a huge amount of canning, baking, freezing etc from their gigantic gardens. They want to grow all their own food organically.
First day she sent me photos and we messaged. Some of my best, fondest memories are from doing the same with my kids when they were youngins.
A couple days later more of the same and then we chatted on the phone. In text she thanked me for bringing her up doing this in our family. That is huge, she never wants to give me credit.
And it was during the day when she hadn't had a drink.
I was able to share some of my memories with her. some about her and her brother when they were young. what it was like canning back when we didn't have a/c in the kitchen and a funny story about my mom.
Still doing my basic meditations. It is beyond amazing how much time monk practioners have spent but the book says even a much lesser amount benefits the brain and the person. so I will continue to be a slow learner and that is okay.
It is too hot to cook much or even have an appetite. I did get some thin sliced chicken breasts, pounded them with the meat tenderizer. why? I dunno, I just like that thing lol. mixed up egg/milk in a bowl and a plate of flour liberally salted and peppered. Did a double dip...putting them thro eggs and flour twice then pan fried them. was yummy and I was wanting seconds.
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I have discovered Donna Everhart books in my kindle unlimited and for the 3d day in a row, reading a book a day. They are more evocative than any movie could be for me. The first one was set in the depression, the second later in the 60's in appalachia and moonshining, now another same region.
I felt that blazing heat of summer in them. and get ever so grateful for my air conditioning. I am in appalachia. retired here. I overflow with gratitude and pleasure that my bedroom stays at 64 and darkened and every night, it feels ever so fine to slide into the bed with the sheets topped with a certain style of pile of blankets on top. to be shed or added as needed for the most comfort.
It has been too hot to cook for awhile and Scott still can't eat much but those southern spreads in the books have me salivating and yearning. It is a little cooler today so I have put in a pan of scalloped potatoes made with cream of mushroom in the oven. I did not have the right size casserole so put them in a 9x9 baking pan, then discovered I had no foil to cover them. Hope they come out okay. Was my favorite growing up and mom would always leave the leftovers set out for me. I have some thick pork chops and a recipe for a dry rub to then add to the oven.
Usually do not use the oven much in the summer but I have been doing brownies late nights.
had a quick text exchange which brought some civil closure...at least for me. with L. I will share more about that later. Time is flying and I need to get the chops ready. The potatoes are starting to smell really good.
I felt that blazing heat of summer in them. and get ever so grateful for my air conditioning. I am in appalachia. retired here. I overflow with gratitude and pleasure that my bedroom stays at 64 and darkened and every night, it feels ever so fine to slide into the bed with the sheets topped with a certain style of pile of blankets on top. to be shed or added as needed for the most comfort.
It has been too hot to cook for awhile and Scott still can't eat much but those southern spreads in the books have me salivating and yearning. It is a little cooler today so I have put in a pan of scalloped potatoes made with cream of mushroom in the oven. I did not have the right size casserole so put them in a 9x9 baking pan, then discovered I had no foil to cover them. Hope they come out okay. Was my favorite growing up and mom would always leave the leftovers set out for me. I have some thick pork chops and a recipe for a dry rub to then add to the oven.
Usually do not use the oven much in the summer but I have been doing brownies late nights.
had a quick text exchange which brought some civil closure...at least for me. with L. I will share more about that later. Time is flying and I need to get the chops ready. The potatoes are starting to smell really good.
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Things with my daughter are going well& I have been trying to establish a connection with my grandson's fiance.. Daughter went over there to make zucchini bread together. I had sent E, the grandaughter, a spaghetti recipe the day before. & then found out daughter had told E that I am a very good budget cook. That made me tear up. Because for a long time daughter wouldn't give me credit for anything.
I had a bad day yesterday. The night before I heard pecking on Scott's window. I knew this would be the drunk neighbor across the street asking for a ride to get beer/liquor. He has been persona non grata here for awhile. I didn't hear Scott leave but then looked out the door and he was gone. When he came back I opened the door and he came in with a beer for himself and I thought..whew~coz if he had taken the neighbor that was going to be our first real fight. But I didn't sleep well. My subconsicous was picking up on all the signals. so I brought it up yesterday morning. and yes, he had taken him. I stayed upset all day that he would do something sneaky behind my back. I felt like my trust was betrayed. He wouldn't talk about it when I brought it up. and I am sure neighbor is gloating.
By the end of the day I came to the decision that this had hurt me all day and I was not going to let it ruin my sleep again. I was starting to get mad about it too. So I brought it up again. Made it clear that neighbor was not welcome on my property and that if it had been innocent, he would have messaged me and came to the door..but the way it was done was sneaky. and that I expected a united front. What I did not say but is obvious is that I own this mobile home. I pay the lot rent and utilities.
Scott isn't a moocher. He does all housework and runs all errands. like a gender role switch, which I am very happy with. But I am not going to be disrespected.
Scott hasn't had the grace to apologize. But..this neighbor if given an inch will take a mile. So he will be back and I will see how Scott handles it.
Obviously it is still parked in the back of my mind.
I am going to rest and read today.
I had a bad day yesterday. The night before I heard pecking on Scott's window. I knew this would be the drunk neighbor across the street asking for a ride to get beer/liquor. He has been persona non grata here for awhile. I didn't hear Scott leave but then looked out the door and he was gone. When he came back I opened the door and he came in with a beer for himself and I thought..whew~coz if he had taken the neighbor that was going to be our first real fight. But I didn't sleep well. My subconsicous was picking up on all the signals. so I brought it up yesterday morning. and yes, he had taken him. I stayed upset all day that he would do something sneaky behind my back. I felt like my trust was betrayed. He wouldn't talk about it when I brought it up. and I am sure neighbor is gloating.
By the end of the day I came to the decision that this had hurt me all day and I was not going to let it ruin my sleep again. I was starting to get mad about it too. So I brought it up again. Made it clear that neighbor was not welcome on my property and that if it had been innocent, he would have messaged me and came to the door..but the way it was done was sneaky. and that I expected a united front. What I did not say but is obvious is that I own this mobile home. I pay the lot rent and utilities.
Scott isn't a moocher. He does all housework and runs all errands. like a gender role switch, which I am very happy with. But I am not going to be disrespected.
Scott hasn't had the grace to apologize. But..this neighbor if given an inch will take a mile. So he will be back and I will see how Scott handles it.
Obviously it is still parked in the back of my mind.
I am going to rest and read today.
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What I want him to say is "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you". That isn't going to happen. He did say that he didn't think anything about it and thought it was okay with me. but won't really talk with me about it.
I read a little while and then just went back to bed and slept the rest of the day. Until my back started hurting and now I am up. And my feelings are still very hurt. I don't know how to act like everything is fine and just sweep it under the rug. when it isn't fine. But I did tell him my feelings and thoughts.
Neighbor had to be drunk to be emboldened enough to come over here. And now he will try it again. Scott does know how to say 'no" very easily and I know that he believes that you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you. I do trust that he will say no.
And I am just going to have to work myself through my feelings without betraying myself.
I read a little while and then just went back to bed and slept the rest of the day. Until my back started hurting and now I am up. And my feelings are still very hurt. I don't know how to act like everything is fine and just sweep it under the rug. when it isn't fine. But I did tell him my feelings and thoughts.
Neighbor had to be drunk to be emboldened enough to come over here. And now he will try it again. Scott does know how to say 'no" very easily and I know that he believes that you shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you. I do trust that he will say no.
And I am just going to have to work myself through my feelings without betraying myself.
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I can understand how infuriating something like this is - but "hurt"? He didn't do anything to you - he did something you refuse to do for a neighbor you're not on good terms with. Granted, he's enabling someone's drinking. I wouldn't and you wouldn't. But I don't expect my SO to walk in lock-step with me.
I get that it's your home and all - but from what's been written here, you're treating a partner like a child who has to follow your rules.
I'd be irritated as heck. My SO has friends i don't care for at all. But he's my SO. not my child. (AND yup, my house and I pay the bills)
I get that it's your home and all - but from what's been written here, you're treating a partner like a child who has to follow your rules.
I'd be irritated as heck. My SO has friends i don't care for at all. But he's my SO. not my child. (AND yup, my house and I pay the bills)
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Thank you, Velma. really.
The thing is that this neighbor cussed me out royally (not for the first time) and then broke into my house. For the first time, we started locking our doors.
and he and Scott are not even friends. we were. when he came over, Scott would go to his room because he didn't like him drunk. which he always was.
I just didn't show him the nasty texts the way I did with L.
I wasn't angry. I was hurt by the message this sent to the neighbor. who I am sure is gloating about pulling a sneaky one over on me. and the thought that Scott would pull a sneaky. And I felt threatened.
I should not have played that card that I pay for everything. It's not fair and he does enough to pull his weight and then some. I didn't say it to him, would never. but was venting here.
In Scott's defense before neighbor went far past all boundaries with me...I didn't care if he gave him a ride. So, Scott said he didn't think anything about it. If I were going to be mad at anyone it would be the neighbor, not Scott. This is a pattern with neighbor that I won't countenance anymore.
Anyway, there was no sorry but he did see that it made me cry and he has never seen me cry before. So he was then very tenderhearted and super thoughtful the next day.
I have gotten a lot of rest. needed it.
I really don't try to control him. I respect him way more than that. and it is one thing he really appreciates about me because his ex was on him about everything he did all the time.
But there are 2 people in the neighborhood who have abused me and they aren't welcome in any way, shape or form. And I know it won't happen again.
Scott has sent me a bunch of loving and tender memes too. Some about trying to help people who then kick you in the teeth. So he gets it.
Neighbor will peck on his window again and he will say no. He is very very good at saying NO. One of the things I really, really like about him.
We are going to be fine. and we will have each other's back. which is what this was about..he just didn't know it.
and after I told him that what neighbor said was even worse than L. Then this is a settled matter.
When he read what L said to me..he told me that he wouldn't take another meal down there if he were starving. Because he would actually walk meals down to him almost daily.
The thing is that this neighbor cussed me out royally (not for the first time) and then broke into my house. For the first time, we started locking our doors.
and he and Scott are not even friends. we were. when he came over, Scott would go to his room because he didn't like him drunk. which he always was.
I just didn't show him the nasty texts the way I did with L.
I wasn't angry. I was hurt by the message this sent to the neighbor. who I am sure is gloating about pulling a sneaky one over on me. and the thought that Scott would pull a sneaky. And I felt threatened.
I should not have played that card that I pay for everything. It's not fair and he does enough to pull his weight and then some. I didn't say it to him, would never. but was venting here.
In Scott's defense before neighbor went far past all boundaries with me...I didn't care if he gave him a ride. So, Scott said he didn't think anything about it. If I were going to be mad at anyone it would be the neighbor, not Scott. This is a pattern with neighbor that I won't countenance anymore.
Anyway, there was no sorry but he did see that it made me cry and he has never seen me cry before. So he was then very tenderhearted and super thoughtful the next day.
I have gotten a lot of rest. needed it.
I really don't try to control him. I respect him way more than that. and it is one thing he really appreciates about me because his ex was on him about everything he did all the time.
But there are 2 people in the neighborhood who have abused me and they aren't welcome in any way, shape or form. And I know it won't happen again.
Scott has sent me a bunch of loving and tender memes too. Some about trying to help people who then kick you in the teeth. So he gets it.
Neighbor will peck on his window again and he will say no. He is very very good at saying NO. One of the things I really, really like about him.
We are going to be fine. and we will have each other's back. which is what this was about..he just didn't know it.
and after I told him that what neighbor said was even worse than L. Then this is a settled matter.
When he read what L said to me..he told me that he wouldn't take another meal down there if he were starving. Because he would actually walk meals down to him almost daily.
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Made a wrong turn running an errand in a town over. It took us through a very pretty drive to see the rolling mountains of appalachia. They were so verdant green and undefiled, very serene. occasional strips of mimosa trees in bloom, delicate pink powder puffs.
Got home and a rain shower passed over. and I love the sound of rain too.
Finished one book that was about the hard side of life in these parts. There are many of those. But there is beauty and strength also. Getting ready to get busy with the next one I have started.
The only drama I care for is in what I read! Otherwise, a peaceful life.
Got home and a rain shower passed over. and I love the sound of rain too.
Finished one book that was about the hard side of life in these parts. There are many of those. But there is beauty and strength also. Getting ready to get busy with the next one I have started.
The only drama I care for is in what I read! Otherwise, a peaceful life.
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My father died this past November. It has really thrown me for a loop. But I am getting a nice little sum from the sale of the house. Found a couple of guys from Craigslist to do some of the handyman work around here. They have a start up company and I know a few in the neighborhood who could use them. Anyway, on a whim, I stopped over at L's. Because I knew that before his mother died, she had bought him a lot of very nice materials to work on his home. It has been 8 months since we last spoke. We visited for a little while. He STILL has not got his inheritance. In August it will be 2 years and his sis is doling out $3k and telling him it has to last 5 months. But he still hasn't and won't get an attorney. So, no, he doesn't need handymen. But he had fallen while drunk and has one of the worst skin wounds I have ever seen in my life. The middle was green and looked mossy, surrounded by fire red flesh. So, I got his phone number and I said I would look it up. Then called and I told him that he had a bacterial infection and he had to see a Dr asap. shared some special gauze we had here. He had been wrapping it in toilet paper. When I asked how he was, he said "not well" and said he had mostly been drinking.
I don't think he has done even the simplest of housework in several months. It is now a hoard including trash. The groceries not needing refrig are in bags just inside the door. None of the floor is cleared..all covered with crap. He just has a path of footstep places. and has let himself go. no haircut, quit trimming his beard. wearing a black t-shirt covered in cat hair. I mean...everything. It was horrible.
He said he had given up coffee because: (drunk reasoning) that he drinks one day, sleeps, feels horrible the next day and sleeps all day, on the third day he would have coffee and it would perk him up which led him to think it would be fun to drink.
I have never seen anyone living so low!!!
We agreed he would see his Dr today and call me and let me know what they said. So, yes, I chatted with him a little, but I could soon hear the gin in his voice (and reminded him that he isn't supposed to drink while taking antibiotics..a waste of time, I know.) and got off the phone.
I do not wish to resume a friendship relationship, or be his mother. or career or confidant. But it is so very sad to see that he has absolutely no one and has just laid up there deteriorating.
He did ask if I had any hygienic wipes & so when Scott went out, he put some in a bag on his door.
He is still blocked from my FB.
The only thing that he loves, takes care of and gives him meaning is his cat hoard. I have often thought about calling elder services but he is okay with how he is living and being the caretaker of those cats is his reason to live. very literally, I mean that. So, I won't turn him in because they would take most of his beloved felines.
He is going to drink himself to death, however long that takes. But he has slipped down quite a lot in 8 months time. Not that he seems seriously physically ill but more that he seems incapable of taking care of himself.
I wanted to update and share...this is what hard core alcoholism looks like and it is ugly suffering.
I don't think he has done even the simplest of housework in several months. It is now a hoard including trash. The groceries not needing refrig are in bags just inside the door. None of the floor is cleared..all covered with crap. He just has a path of footstep places. and has let himself go. no haircut, quit trimming his beard. wearing a black t-shirt covered in cat hair. I mean...everything. It was horrible.
He said he had given up coffee because: (drunk reasoning) that he drinks one day, sleeps, feels horrible the next day and sleeps all day, on the third day he would have coffee and it would perk him up which led him to think it would be fun to drink.
I have never seen anyone living so low!!!
We agreed he would see his Dr today and call me and let me know what they said. So, yes, I chatted with him a little, but I could soon hear the gin in his voice (and reminded him that he isn't supposed to drink while taking antibiotics..a waste of time, I know.) and got off the phone.
I do not wish to resume a friendship relationship, or be his mother. or career or confidant. But it is so very sad to see that he has absolutely no one and has just laid up there deteriorating.
He did ask if I had any hygienic wipes & so when Scott went out, he put some in a bag on his door.
He is still blocked from my FB.
The only thing that he loves, takes care of and gives him meaning is his cat hoard. I have often thought about calling elder services but he is okay with how he is living and being the caretaker of those cats is his reason to live. very literally, I mean that. So, I won't turn him in because they would take most of his beloved felines.
He is going to drink himself to death, however long that takes. But he has slipped down quite a lot in 8 months time. Not that he seems seriously physically ill but more that he seems incapable of taking care of himself.
I wanted to update and share...this is what hard core alcoholism looks like and it is ugly suffering.
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Hello Live,
I'm sorry for the loss of your father. It is hard to lose a parent. We always have things we want to say, but they aren't here to finish things up, or clear up an old issue, or just forgive each other. My mother died seven yeas ago, and I'm still working things out with her in my mind. So take care.
I read your posts and the stories of L next door. He reminds me a lot of some people I knew in my childhood, as I grew up in those rolling hills you now live in. I feel great sadness for his life, in this last stage of alcoholism he is enduring. I know you have done your best. It is always a roller coaster with an alcoholic in one's life. And the stress takes its toll on our health. So you are right to take long breaks away from him to restore your mind and body. I'm sure he is desperately lonely. I guess his only respite is the haze of the alcohol, long periods of sleep, and the sweet cats who don't know what a king baby is. He is unable to control his emotions and delusions at this point. One almost would wish his health would break down in a major way so he'd wind up in a hospital and perhaps actually be helped with his alcoholism while there.
It always astonishes me just how long severe alcoholics can go on. The human body is remarkably strong.
I'm sorry for the loss of your father. It is hard to lose a parent. We always have things we want to say, but they aren't here to finish things up, or clear up an old issue, or just forgive each other. My mother died seven yeas ago, and I'm still working things out with her in my mind. So take care.
I read your posts and the stories of L next door. He reminds me a lot of some people I knew in my childhood, as I grew up in those rolling hills you now live in. I feel great sadness for his life, in this last stage of alcoholism he is enduring. I know you have done your best. It is always a roller coaster with an alcoholic in one's life. And the stress takes its toll on our health. So you are right to take long breaks away from him to restore your mind and body. I'm sure he is desperately lonely. I guess his only respite is the haze of the alcohol, long periods of sleep, and the sweet cats who don't know what a king baby is. He is unable to control his emotions and delusions at this point. One almost would wish his health would break down in a major way so he'd wind up in a hospital and perhaps actually be helped with his alcoholism while there.
It always astonishes me just how long severe alcoholics can go on. The human body is remarkably strong.
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
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Thank you Dee. And thank you Lucy. You hit things spot on.
Yes, I was trying to get him to go to the emergency room for his leg and hoping he would get hospitalized. He was thinking he might need to be. But said he couldn't be gone for more than 2 days as the cats needed fed and watered. I did not volunteer to care for them.
But I know and believe that if I had kept a (dysfunctional) friendship up with him...he probably would not be quite so bad off. Simply because I am the only person who would go into his home and the only person he would allow. Because of the foul cat smell..toxic air. and feces out in the open. I had already watched all of hoarders, so... and at first I made him watch several with me in exchange for hanging out with him. lol.
In this past 8 months, he has stopped living. You are so correct that he is desperately lonely and ...he has a special fondness for me altho he forgets that when in certain states of being.
smh, I went over there to sell him handyman services. I already got those guys a very good referral for a big job and I think they gave me a low estimate, in part because of that. I am replacing kitchen appliances and finishing out installing my jacuzzi and the plumbing that goes with the enlarged bathroom and tiling the floor. for starters. I fiddled around and have a rough draft of a flyer made for them. I live in a mobile home park and know that many people need help...if they can afford it. So, this gives me a reason to walk. Dropping flyers off. I would like to help them succeed. That would be fun for me.
Yes, I was trying to get him to go to the emergency room for his leg and hoping he would get hospitalized. He was thinking he might need to be. But said he couldn't be gone for more than 2 days as the cats needed fed and watered. I did not volunteer to care for them.
But I know and believe that if I had kept a (dysfunctional) friendship up with him...he probably would not be quite so bad off. Simply because I am the only person who would go into his home and the only person he would allow. Because of the foul cat smell..toxic air. and feces out in the open. I had already watched all of hoarders, so... and at first I made him watch several with me in exchange for hanging out with him. lol.
In this past 8 months, he has stopped living. You are so correct that he is desperately lonely and ...he has a special fondness for me altho he forgets that when in certain states of being.
smh, I went over there to sell him handyman services. I already got those guys a very good referral for a big job and I think they gave me a low estimate, in part because of that. I am replacing kitchen appliances and finishing out installing my jacuzzi and the plumbing that goes with the enlarged bathroom and tiling the floor. for starters. I fiddled around and have a rough draft of a flyer made for them. I live in a mobile home park and know that many people need help...if they can afford it. So, this gives me a reason to walk. Dropping flyers off. I would like to help them succeed. That would be fun for me.
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