Thomas45

Don't worry about what they think about you. Pay attention to what you think about yourself.

dandylion

ditto to that...what Thomas said.

If they would just assist in getting the car fixed....

dandylion

pinkpeony

well I guess AH working on the car isn't happening this weekend.....he left early this morning before I was up and it's just about 9pm and no sign of him.

Of course.

jjj111

Sorry to hear that, Pink. What do you think your plan C will be, if plan B of convincing him to fix the car doesn't work? You've mentioned a DV shelter, would it work for you to go there in June without a car?

fluffyflea

Google the Wheel of Abuse. You'll see all the different kinds of abuse.

fluffyflea

Are you a nurse?

pinkpeony

Yes I am. But months ago my student loan lender filed a complaint against my license to the board of nursing after refusing to work out a payment I could actually afford at the time.

So, I can't work as a nurse until somehow that all gets taken care of.

Its all just too much.

Tamerua

Pink, since you've been out of work, could you claim forbearance now? That should last a year and then get back to working? And I'm trying to think.... On the student loan, when I couldn't afford it, I had applied to have it moved to another agency that would work with me.... Let me do some research and I'll PM you if that's ok?

pinkpeony

well he just came home, was here for 20 mins and then said that he was going to sleep somewhere else tonight and wouldn't be back here until tomorrow night.

he knows there isn't anything to eat here, I ate the last two sweet potatoes today and now I'm stuck here all day and evening tomorrow with nothing to eat while he goes to his new girlfriends. and who knows if tomorrow night he will bring anything home.

now I'm crying. something I NEVER do. dammit.

also my daughter is at a friends all weekend. he does this type of thing when she's gone.

pinkpeony

I don't know.
I don't even have it in me to call and deal with it all. Just feel very defeated.
I have to deal with the student loan companies and the board of nursing....

pinkpeony

I don't know. I do know they had also started to garnish my paycheck, as the last paycheck I received had a garnishment on it.....

Tamerua

sending hugs. I know this feeling, been there. Do you have someone in person you can talk to?

charis78

Pink. You're very pretty. Why put up with his crap?

pinkpeony

Thank you, but I'm really not. I actually have a facial birth defect on the right side of my face and my front teeth are very crooked. Hence the hand covering the side of my face and no teeth showing.

My self-confidence is about a -10

charis78

Still pretty. But I feel sorta bad about that comment. After reading earlier posts it seems your kinda stuck eh.

pinkpeony

It's okay, really

I could do other work, sure, but I've been stuck out in the country without any transportation now for quite a long time. No family in the area, no friends to help.

And my student loans are like 40,000, so I doubt they will ever be paid off, lol

jjj111

If your loans are eligible to be consolidated through the fedloan program, you can have your payments tied to your income--so in your case, payments would be $0. And if you went back to work full time as a nurse, you would be eligible for public service loan forgiveness after 10 years. IDK how this works if the loans are already in default, but it would be worth giving them a call. The number is 1-800-557-7392. Here is a link: https://studentaid.ed.gov/repay-loans/consolidation

marie1960

I know you are a nurse and I know you are a smart woman, but I can't help thinking back to a post of yours a couple weeks back, about how hubby was being all lovey dovey, and wanted to be intimate, certainly hope you are taking the necessary precautions to protect yourself from STD'S.

i am so very sorry Pink, Your husband is a player, he has zero respect for himself ,or you, or your family unit as a whole.

I pray you find a way out, and soon, he is not worthy of your time, energy or thoughts.

I can understand why you looked in his phone, I have been in your shoes. It was the quickest way to the truth, another affirmation for you, (painful as it is) but now that you have confirmation, what is your plan? Do you really think you can make it until June when your daughter graduates?

There has to be a plan B, keep reaching out to folks, there has to be a better way.

Hugs, my friend.

LexieCat

Yeah, the public service forgiveness came to mind for me, too. But I too don't know how that works when the loan is already in default. I'd inquire--it can't hurt to ask. If you could take advantage of something like that, you might be able to relocate as part of your service and get away from all the insanity.

I consider myself VERY fortunate to have gone to school so many years ago, back when education was affordable, and that my kids went to inexpensive schools we could afford. I actually paid my share of one son's college tuition with a very low-interest credit card.

happybeingme

Pink, I am greatly disturbed that you have no food. What happens when your daughter gets home? Is she expected to go hungry as well? You need to do something now! You say you can't but you can and you should. You are just as guilty of neglecting your daughter as your husband if you allow her to go without food.
You needn't wait for her to graduate to leave. Pull her out of school and home school her these last months and get to the shelter now. It's where you will be going in the end anyway, right?