Finally did it....some good news

Old 06-15-2012, 09:19 PM
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Finally did it....some good news

I got a temporary restraining order (pfa) today. The cops did not serve him until around 10:30 this evening, but he is out of this home.

He got his first full pay yesterday, and bought himself some beer.

He started drinking early, was pretty buzzed when our home based therapist came. Said he does not think he has a problem, does not think it would be a problem to drink if he was to take our twin babies out of town.

Later he proceeded to try and put the babies down for a nap at 5:30 in the evening. An argument ensued, he shoved me out of my bedroom, slammed the door in my face, then shortly thereafter, spit twice in my face. I was hoping he would hit me, but I remember reading somewhere that the spitting would be enough for tne pfa. I called the police and the shelter, and they confirmed as much.

He broke my backup laptop by slamming the screen down, it no longer works, so I am using my nook for internet. That is the second one he broke.

Part of me feels bad tht it has come to this. I feel bad for him, but he brought this on himself, I know that. My kids deserve better.

I am a little anxious, but my mom and step dad are in town for the weekend and are only 2 miles from here if I need them. I am here with my baby twins, and my dog. My older girls are at my brothers for a few days.

My hearing is this coming Thursdayy.
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Old 06-15-2012, 10:16 PM
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Wow. That must have been hard, but good for you for standing up for yourself and your kids. That was the right thing to do! Is the hearing for a permanent order?

Big hugs and prayers tonight. Stay strong and safe.
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Old 06-15-2012, 10:46 PM
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Hugs, good for you for placing the restraining order. He is dangerous and out of control, please take care of yourself, keep reaching out to your family and here. You are definitely not alone. You and your kids are #1 priority.
More hugs and light your way.
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Old 06-16-2012, 12:06 AM
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Hang in there sweetie. But please play it safe, he sounds scary. Have bags packed for you and the kids, a stash of cash and essentials. You are doing the right thing by your children!

Big, sunny California hugs coming at you to help you know you are not alone.
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Old 06-16-2012, 12:13 AM
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I dont know the history with you and this man, but i know from experience its not good for anyone. I was involved in a bad relationship. Of course he didnt show me the real him right away. like a gentlemen he waited until I was in love with him and serious in out relationship before he became verbally then after awhile longer physically abusive. Stay strong and do what you have to for your kids and yourself. It may seem like the wrong thing to do at times but you have to protect your little ones and give yourself the chance to be loved the way you deserve to be loved. Best of wishes
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Old 06-16-2012, 04:43 AM
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Good morning. The hearing is for a permanent pfa. They also told me to file the paperwork for custody that morning.

I will be on the lookout for our safety. I do not think he would try anything as he seems to be afraid of the police plus he seems like he is nothing but a bully. Nevertheless, I will be careful. My stepdad will change my locks for me.

I do feel bad for him, but I know that I cannot go on like this forever. I know my kids can't, either. My oldest dd cried on her last day of school b/c she wouldn't have school to go to so that she could be away from him. What kid cries on their last day??

I have an appt with legal aid next week. I need to find out how to get police reports, too. I will also see if my dd's therapist can help in any way.

I have been waiting for this opportunity for some time now. When he spit on and pushed me, I almost wanted to thank him. I had asked him lots of times to leave, but he would refuse. I took the chance when I did bc I though this may be my last chance before he really hurts me. He has told me he hates me and when he was arguing with me the other day, he had an odd look in his eyes. He made some gestures like he was going to hit me and had his finger in my face.

My family is so happy and glad that I finally stood up for myself and my kiddos. I just hope I have not let them be forever damaged and it is not too late. I was with him for three years.
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Old 06-16-2012, 04:56 AM
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I am happy for you too! Be safe and keep moving forward.
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