wildflower70

I need some help guys..

wildflower70

Dee...are you there?

wildflower70

I really need someone to talk to.....I've gotten lost so quickly. PLEASE REACH OUT

andyh

what's up wildflower? what do you need help with?

Gabe1980

Hi Wildflower. Please don't give up my friend. Is there anything else you can try that you have not tried before?

I've been relapsing every month for a year. It's breaking me. I've decided on more support. Best wishes to you xx

Gerard52

Wildflower the best thing you can do now is take it easy and stop drinking. Once the dust settles and you are AF again, reflect and consider why you relapsed.

6 months is a big milestone and naturally you had internal conflict about stopping. You got tricked this time it is not the end of the world. Forgive yourself and move forward with your recovery.

wildflower70

I was as strong as anyone could be..almost 6 months sober and.....someone bought me a bottle of champagne. Yep, I wanted to say...I Don't drink. But I'm still embarrassed that I'm an alcoholic.

I ripped that bottle open on Saturday night like no one's business, and the rest is history.

I have been...not so great ever since...

wildflower70

I really think that I want to go to the edge...I'm tired of being perfect..

And, so far, it's not gotten me anywhere.....ugh

andyh

like you avatar says - keep calm the sky hasn't fallen.

if you have alcohol with you now, pour it away & try to get some sleep - it's late night where you are, right? check in with SR when you wake up - there's lots of love & support here for you - & you can figure out a plan to get you back on track.

hang in there, it's not as bad as it seems

Gerard52

Why on earth would someone buy you champagne for being 6 months sober. That is crazy no wonder you got triggered.

Gabe1980

Yeah, get rid of whats left and start over. Everything isn't lost. You did such a good job that you can get back on your feet again. It was a mistake, now turn it around 😊

wildflower70

I know it's not that bad..I'm just tired of proving myself...over and over and nada..

At this point,

Why not retire to a nice place and sip margaritas?

Gerard52

Because it will end in same old misery and only get worse.

wildflower70

I was fine...

Then I decided to date..

Big mistake..

I couldn't even meet him without breaking open that champagne.

Now, I can't find myself, without that champagne....

John65

Hi wildflower, please try not to beat yourself up about it, what's done is done and nothing can change that. As things stand it looks more like a lapse than a full relapse, so try and get back to sobriety as soon as you can. Good luck.

J

wildflower70

What if I don't want to come back? Yet? I'm getting on a plane Saturday morning to see my family...the dreaded family.

The ones who feed my addiction......I can't go there sober.......not in this lifetime.

John65

Do you think that deciding to drink the champagne had anything to do with the visit to your family coming up? Had you been considering drinking before then?

Meraviglioso

wildflower, you can come back from this. They key is to stop NOW though. NOW. You can see your family sober, it might be unpleasant, but it is possible. Another, probably better option, is to call off the trip altogether to allow yourself time to get things together. You can schedule a visit at a later date.

wildflower70

Drinking the booze had everything to do with going to see them...

I am fine on my own.....they make me feel like s$$t.

I don't want to go, but my mom needs me , crap.

John65

In what way does your mum need you?