One Year and Under Club Part 45
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,481
One Year and Under Club Part 45
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,183
Hello Undies,
Thanks Dee for another thread.
I actually have a "tell someone story" to share. Not all that exciting, but I thought I would finally tell my PCP that I am an alkie. So at my check up yesterday, I did tell him. Yes, my Dr is actually someone I should tell.
It was also in part an amends because I told him that even though it wasn't my drug of choice, I would get 30 percocet's at my bi-annual visits faking back pain for a cheap $5 high.
While I really do at times get back pain I can alleviate it simply by taking the time to stretch and ice. No, I would get those 30 pills and take them over like 4 days and live in some altered world. I'd miss them when the were gone, even count them down, but the craving would just go away quickly. Never the case with AL...I mean booze.
He was very cool about it. In the past we often just talked about world events, politics (we agree), ACA (affordable care act), elderly care that we shared, and one time he was saying he didn't quite understand what I did in converting bank branches...crazy, he wanted minute details. Good Dude, for sure. Yesterday it was addiction and the virtues of the Whole 30 diet that I am about to undertake to cleanse my body. He gave it a big thumbs up. Not a fad diet thing...just all and most importantly ONLY the right organic things.
His take on addiction was interesting. He said that it runs rampant. Varies from the truly life threatening like drugs and alcohol to internet, cell phones, tv, food...etc. He said that he feels it is a major CAUSE of depression. Not the other way around...was exactly that way for me. Depression was simply episodic for me...quit drinking and it went away. Not true for all forms of depression, though.
I just did an Evelyn Wood of past posts. Haha, those Sr's of us will recognize Evelyn as the creator of the first speed reading technique. Anyway, I did read something about future worry about dating and wanting to drink.
What has worked for me is a more general approach...not dating specific. I simply no longer allow myself to live in the future for anything...good or bad. I did that for decades. The worst thing that living robed me of was gratitude. How could I ever be grateful for what I had if I always wanted more?
On the rebound, Undies...
Carlos
PS: NYM, if you remember, I have MSU and KY in my pool. Two of final 4. Give me that final and it is party time! That party will include my driving to see my baby g-daughter again to deliver SIL's bounty...as well as a nice contribution to the huge piggy bank I brought her last week....fingers crossed!!
Thanks Dee for another thread.
I actually have a "tell someone story" to share. Not all that exciting, but I thought I would finally tell my PCP that I am an alkie. So at my check up yesterday, I did tell him. Yes, my Dr is actually someone I should tell.
It was also in part an amends because I told him that even though it wasn't my drug of choice, I would get 30 percocet's at my bi-annual visits faking back pain for a cheap $5 high.
While I really do at times get back pain I can alleviate it simply by taking the time to stretch and ice. No, I would get those 30 pills and take them over like 4 days and live in some altered world. I'd miss them when the were gone, even count them down, but the craving would just go away quickly. Never the case with AL...I mean booze.
He was very cool about it. In the past we often just talked about world events, politics (we agree), ACA (affordable care act), elderly care that we shared, and one time he was saying he didn't quite understand what I did in converting bank branches...crazy, he wanted minute details. Good Dude, for sure. Yesterday it was addiction and the virtues of the Whole 30 diet that I am about to undertake to cleanse my body. He gave it a big thumbs up. Not a fad diet thing...just all and most importantly ONLY the right organic things.
His take on addiction was interesting. He said that it runs rampant. Varies from the truly life threatening like drugs and alcohol to internet, cell phones, tv, food...etc. He said that he feels it is a major CAUSE of depression. Not the other way around...was exactly that way for me. Depression was simply episodic for me...quit drinking and it went away. Not true for all forms of depression, though.
I just did an Evelyn Wood of past posts. Haha, those Sr's of us will recognize Evelyn as the creator of the first speed reading technique. Anyway, I did read something about future worry about dating and wanting to drink.
What has worked for me is a more general approach...not dating specific. I simply no longer allow myself to live in the future for anything...good or bad. I did that for decades. The worst thing that living robed me of was gratitude. How could I ever be grateful for what I had if I always wanted more?
On the rebound, Undies...
Carlos
PS: NYM, if you remember, I have MSU and KY in my pool. Two of final 4. Give me that final and it is party time! That party will include my driving to see my baby g-daughter again to deliver SIL's bounty...as well as a nice contribution to the huge piggy bank I brought her last week....fingers crossed!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Hi Undies
It's good to see that everyone is staying sober. When I first stopped drinking I was willing to admit that most times I drank I couldn't stop, that many times ended in blackouts, and that I had a hard time sticking to the many commitments I'd made over the years to cut back.
When I first stopped drinking I had a hard time saying "no thanks" when offered a drink, not because I wanted a drink, but because it drew attention to the fact that I was doing something different and unexpected. In the suburbs, my crowd works hard and parties hard. I told the few people closest to me early on. Aside from that I avoided many social settings with heavy drinking. At first people asked where I was, and eventually they stopped. Finally, when the time was right, I told a few of them that I stopped drinking and didn't plan on taking it back up. No one questioned me about it. (Probably because they'd seen me drink).
Gradually, through my involvement in AA and SR, my identity as an alcoholic is taking shape. When I first went to AA I could barely squeak out my introduction at the beginning of meetings. The enormity of the stigma in my mind of "alcoholism" made me sweat and tremble. I had to dig deep to come to terms with who I am before I could share it honestly with someone else.
It's good to see that everyone is staying sober. When I first stopped drinking I was willing to admit that most times I drank I couldn't stop, that many times ended in blackouts, and that I had a hard time sticking to the many commitments I'd made over the years to cut back.
When I first stopped drinking I had a hard time saying "no thanks" when offered a drink, not because I wanted a drink, but because it drew attention to the fact that I was doing something different and unexpected. In the suburbs, my crowd works hard and parties hard. I told the few people closest to me early on. Aside from that I avoided many social settings with heavy drinking. At first people asked where I was, and eventually they stopped. Finally, when the time was right, I told a few of them that I stopped drinking and didn't plan on taking it back up. No one questioned me about it. (Probably because they'd seen me drink).
Gradually, through my involvement in AA and SR, my identity as an alcoholic is taking shape. When I first went to AA I could barely squeak out my introduction at the beginning of meetings. The enormity of the stigma in my mind of "alcoholism" made me sweat and tremble. I had to dig deep to come to terms with who I am before I could share it honestly with someone else.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 984
glee, yeah, that stigma of alcoholic stings and I sorta feel that when saying no to a drink, I'm tacitly saying that I'm an alcoholic. Realistically, most people aren't thinking that. My friends who have seen me at my worst probably think I'm just one of the group that drinks too much, but not really unlike others. My friends don't know about my drinking alone and I also have a group of friends I know through work and some from collehe/high school, so my bad drunk episodes aren't always seen by the same people.
I guess just knowing that I have a problem with alcohol is sufficient. If I relapse, I'll be massively disappointed. I'm making a habit of checking in on here so that if it happens, it won't be like last summer where instead of one night of drinking breaking a streak and then just leading to me going back to my old ways, it would be contained and I'd get right back on. I put my sobriety date in my signature below and I'll be honest, over the weekend, I thought about drinking and then thought about how changing the signature would stink. Other factors got that craving to go away, but that bit of accountability helped.
IWLSAST, I'm in a bracket with 550 people and a $25 buy in and I submitted two entires, one with Duke over Kentucky and one with Wisconsin over Duke (Michigan State in the final four), so I'm rooting the exact opposite of you this weekend! I'm also a big Duke fan, so really just pulling for my team. The money would be a nice bonus.
I guess just knowing that I have a problem with alcohol is sufficient. If I relapse, I'll be massively disappointed. I'm making a habit of checking in on here so that if it happens, it won't be like last summer where instead of one night of drinking breaking a streak and then just leading to me going back to my old ways, it would be contained and I'd get right back on. I put my sobriety date in my signature below and I'll be honest, over the weekend, I thought about drinking and then thought about how changing the signature would stink. Other factors got that craving to go away, but that bit of accountability helped.
IWLSAST, I'm in a bracket with 550 people and a $25 buy in and I submitted two entires, one with Duke over Kentucky and one with Wisconsin over Duke (Michigan State in the final four), so I'm rooting the exact opposite of you this weekend! I'm also a big Duke fan, so really just pulling for my team. The money would be a nice bonus.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,977
Carlos that's great you were honest with your doctor about the pills and everything.
I was feeling in a funk today and thoughts of drinking popped up. I talked with one of my friends and she talked me into going to a meeting tonight. I enjoyed the meeting and got my 9 month chip. I def feel better now.
I was feeling in a funk today and thoughts of drinking popped up. I talked with one of my friends and she talked me into going to a meeting tonight. I enjoyed the meeting and got my 9 month chip. I def feel better now.
The Long and Winding Road....
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Brisbane QLD
Posts: 897
Hey you guys
Carlos booze free and glee I hesr ya
The week of my exams when they were over the drinking thoughts were very loud
Mental note dont get so tired and stressed next time
Walking the line
V
Carlos booze free and glee I hesr ya
The week of my exams when they were over the drinking thoughts were very loud
Mental note dont get so tired and stressed next time
Walking the line
V
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Location: New York
Posts: 984
Vandermast, I had exams recently as well and I'm not going to lie, it felt weird not getting totally hammered when the last one is over. That had been pretty much standard for me after an exam. Go out with classmates for like 5-6 drinks, then back to my apt to chug vodka. Would wake up with a pounding headache and lots of regret. The relief of the exams being over wasn't really registering.
Even with a bit of a cold, it was much better waking up hangover and regret free the following morning. Could really feel the exam stress/anxiety lifted and nice not replacing it with embarassment and self loathing related to my drinking.
Even with a bit of a cold, it was much better waking up hangover and regret free the following morning. Could really feel the exam stress/anxiety lifted and nice not replacing it with embarassment and self loathing related to my drinking.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: US East Coast
Posts: 14,287
I suspect that for many of us those old drinking associations really provoke those idealized images of drinking. It certainly happens to me. What a sneaky beast is alcoholism! Whenever the thought of drinking pops up, I know I need to think it all the way through.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Hi, SJ!
Spring is definitely a time of new beginnings. Sounds cliche, but I feel it! I am definitely feeling a bit better than in the recent past because of the sun and pleasant temperatures. I hope you will have a good and productive April!
How do you thing you did on your exams, Mets and Vandermast? Well, I hope!
Spring is definitely a time of new beginnings. Sounds cliche, but I feel it! I am definitely feeling a bit better than in the recent past because of the sun and pleasant temperatures. I hope you will have a good and productive April!
How do you thing you did on your exams, Mets and Vandermast? Well, I hope!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Central Texas
Posts: 1,501
Hi, I have no big news here, so I'm just letting everyone know that I still sober. After many unsuccessful attempts to quit, I feel good that this is the time. Sobriety feels so good now I am determined to stay sober for life!
Have a good day everyone.
Have a good day everyone.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Hi Undies
BoozeFree - I think it's great that you went to an AS meeting when you felt like drinking. I can't think of a safer choice. Congratulations on picking up your 9 month chip. You rock!
Van - I never took good care of myself, emotionally and spiritually. It's taken a lot of failure at caring for myself, and seeing how that stress and exhaustion unravel my sobriety, for me to come to understand the fundamental importance of self care. I see today that I have been unrealistic about what I think I should be able to handle or expect from myself. I'm sorry you got so tired and stressed, and hope that you can learn from it. I'll keep trying to learn too.
Mets - I'm glad you didn't get hammered after your exams. I had to study for an exam for work a few months ago. My workplace picked 14 of us to study a small room for 3 weeks, culminating with an exam. If we didn't pass, we didn't get to keep our jobs. It was a different experience altogether to celebrate passing soberly, without fanfare or booze, for the accomplishment to be inherently enough.
I could never get "enough" in active drinking. I was never satisfied. I always wanted more, but what I wanted wasn't necessarily achievable. I can still hope, dream and plan. I can still work hard. I've leaned to do so within realistic frameworks based on my capabilities and opportunities. Being realistic breeds real confidence for me. For example, it's not realistic to expect to go from the call center to the CEO's office, but it is realistic to take the steps to be promoted within the call center. If I want an executive position, it will take years of hard work to get there.
It's always good to see everyone. I hope all are doing well.
BoozeFree - I think it's great that you went to an AS meeting when you felt like drinking. I can't think of a safer choice. Congratulations on picking up your 9 month chip. You rock!
Van - I never took good care of myself, emotionally and spiritually. It's taken a lot of failure at caring for myself, and seeing how that stress and exhaustion unravel my sobriety, for me to come to understand the fundamental importance of self care. I see today that I have been unrealistic about what I think I should be able to handle or expect from myself. I'm sorry you got so tired and stressed, and hope that you can learn from it. I'll keep trying to learn too.
Mets - I'm glad you didn't get hammered after your exams. I had to study for an exam for work a few months ago. My workplace picked 14 of us to study a small room for 3 weeks, culminating with an exam. If we didn't pass, we didn't get to keep our jobs. It was a different experience altogether to celebrate passing soberly, without fanfare or booze, for the accomplishment to be inherently enough.
I could never get "enough" in active drinking. I was never satisfied. I always wanted more, but what I wanted wasn't necessarily achievable. I can still hope, dream and plan. I can still work hard. I've leaned to do so within realistic frameworks based on my capabilities and opportunities. Being realistic breeds real confidence for me. For example, it's not realistic to expect to go from the call center to the CEO's office, but it is realistic to take the steps to be promoted within the call center. If I want an executive position, it will take years of hard work to get there.
It's always good to see everyone. I hope all are doing well.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
