Morning Glory

I love you all too.

There is such beauty in the struggle. It's hard to see when you are in the middle of it, but I can see the beauty in your struggle. It's like watching a flower bloom.

2stop

:kisshug:

Silent_Song

I have felt that way many times... In the center of the storm so to speak. Very difficult to overcome from a too limited view. The problem... may simply be a matter of perspective and changing the horizon -- to go above and beyond yourself in some way. You've probably done it in a limited sense... like you are racing in a sprint but this is a marathon.

2stop

Silent Song..you are so right about the perspective. With PTSD our horizon is one of pain and dark despair. We cannot grasp the sun will rise..and hell we dread the sun rising when it's really bad..another day to bear, another day of existing and struggling, that's where the perspective comes in. To be able to see beyond the horizon. That whole thing of either you can wait to see it to believe it..or you can BELIEVE it...then you shall see it. So difficult. It's much like preparing for a marathon, the marathon of life. The agony and pain spurs us to sprint and run as fast as we can toward anything that will comfort us or make us feel anything but what we are feeling in that moment. Reprogramming our attitrudes and thought processes is more exhausting than running around the world a dozen times.....we probably have with our worry marathons..LOL! I keep reminding myself it is a process. There is not so much a destination, as there is a peace to be found in the moments of the journey, learning to see the beauty in a flowering tree on a walk, hearing a child laugh and not aching inside wishing for our innocence to be returned all new..and untouched by the cruelties of trauma and loss and grief. Learning to love and be vulnerable so that our hearts may feel warmth again takes so much courage. But journey on we must. The journey is the whole point of our life experience, once at our "destination" death awaits to take us to our next "evolution, if you will. Seems so complicated, yet so very simple too. My biggest issue is overthinking and analyzing, I always tell my husband I should have gone into Navy intel or something, spend my time analyzing data and contingencies that might make a difference...LOL..

Well, I hope you are doing alright Silent Song. Ya know your screen name makes me think that inside you hasve so much to share either in art or whatever talent and gift you have , yet this PTSD has silenced your creative life energy. I pray you find relief...and freedom, so that you may enjoy all that your life holds for you. God Bless you my friend. You are in my prayers. hang in there, okay? **hugs**

phoenix

:bluerose <------- 2stop


Like MG said.And you are so beautiful.


hugs

phoenix

2stop

i'm blushing again.....:o You guys are so kind to me. Love ya bunches,

:redrose (((((((((Hugs)))))))))



(((Gentle hugs for Phoenix, How are ya feeling girl?)))

phoenix

I'm doing pretty ok...feeling a bit better, less black and blue..lol.

Feeling so very blessed by all the wonderful people (like you) in my life

phoenix

2stop

phoenix, has your doc recommended alternating hot and cold compresses on the shoulder to help with circulation and boold flow to the area. Some docs have told me it would help. I have a real messed up right shoulder from being hit and thrown by a car while i was standing outside the car, my mom ran over my foot and I flew through the door landed on my shoulder and cheeks and got all busted up. Please be sure to do all the physical therapy they telll you. I waited too long and I healed wrong, some days the muscles in my shoulders actually pull my jaws out of alignment and the pain makes me sit and sob. Yuck. I feel so bad for you, having to work and all. But I know God is going to do something really grand out of all this for you. Your amazing attitude will do wonders too. You are a very special lady Phoenix, and a real miracle for what you have done with yoru life. I know full well how hard it is to come back from a breakdown. At 16 the docs saod i would never recover from the mental breakdown I had, Well I showed them, of course had amny more breakdowns after that initial one, but hey one think an addict is is consistent in the craziest ways LOL.... But now I have a home here at SR..and I am blessed beyond any thing I could describe. Some mornings now I wake up with a smile...because I know I can log on here..and I can give love an drecieve love..and be accepted just how I am...it is so comforting. I love ya bunches, get plenty rest Phoenix, I know we women try and push ourselves, but we gotta heal and have some TLC tooo.

**sending massage, fresh flowers, movie of choice, Godiva chocolates in the prettiest wrapped box you ever did see, a comfy robe and soft plush slippers, a new recliner with heater and massager installed, and lots and lots of (((((Hugs))))**
Your son is very lucky to have amom like you, he will always cary with him the example you show him every day with your strength and courage....give the boy a hug for me..tell him he's got the coolest mom ever!!

:star