Sohard

Hello. I’m wondering how everyone here successfully ignores the thoughts like “maybe I can drink now… Maybe I’ve got it under control after all this time… ”I know I’m not going to drink, at least not tonight, but I really hate that I’m even having those thoughts. I just want to successfully banish them forever. And I’m wondering if anyone has sincerely done that.

doggonecarl

I couldn't 't ignore them completely, but I could meet the insane thoughts of my addiction--because that's what it is if an alcoholic thinks he can drink, insanity--with the rational reminder that I don't drink anymore. Period.

You might not be able to ignore the thoughts, but that doesn't mean you have to obey them.

That you are having these thoughts might mean that you haven't totally accepted that you can't drink. Because if you had accept total and complete sobriety, it would be hard to convince yourself that you could now drink. But if you had somehow left the door open to drinking again...the promise of "some day..." then the addiction is going to call and take you up on that promise.

Hope you remain strong.

fini

hm....i didn’t banish them, really. they left when i totally understood that i could NOT control my drinking.
knowing that with absolute certainty abolished any and all foothold for thoughts like this.

SoberRican

That question I know the answer to. And its No
iwdwyt

Libby06

I have sincerely done that. I had so many attempts and failures at trying to control my drinking, I had to admit utter defeat, and ask for help. I went the AA way. To the core of my being, I know that I can never SAFELY use alcohol again.If I'm controlling my drinking, Im not enjoying it, and if Im enjoying it, I'm not controlling it...Just trainwrecking my way through the lives of those I love most. So there is no point for me to drink it.

Toying with the idea is a non starter for me. I can not afford to think for one single second that I am able to drink. It has always ended badly. If the thought pops up and starts to over stay its welcome, I have to talk to someone and think ALL the way through the first drink. Getting sober was the hardest, most important thing that I have ever done. I dont know if i could ever get it back again.

I dont post much, but I check in here every day. It helps. I saw that you got a new dog. So did I! If I went back to drinking, I would be unqualified to care for him. I rescued him, and he rescued me. My dog does not keep me sober, but he is a reminder that I am undependable when I put alcohol into my body. I signed up to care for him for the rest of his/my life.

A client tipped me with a bottle of red wine today. I have no desire to open it. I am regifting it. That is a miracle! But, if I sat here and let myself believe that I could do it one more time I would start believing my own lies.

Keep it simple, so hard. The struggle is real in the beginning. It gets better, but not if you keep pulling at the thread that you can drink again.

Stayingsassy

I think the thoughts will always be there, so hard. It’s just that in time, you get a lot more confident about your response to these thoughts. I have the nanosecond thought of “22 months, surely I’m cured!” come up too, but I shrug it off as quickly as it comes. I’m not cured, not now or ever.

The thoughts are normal. Just a sign of the addiction, which lives; it’s just that we’ve got it locked in a cage.

plop

I have sincerely done that. I've only been sober for about two years and three months, but I can't even remember when I last thought "well, maybe I could drink now".

I have too many failed attempts at moderation under my belt. I know I cannot drink in moderation. Besides, drinking is no longer a part of my life so I have no reason to think about it. Once you accept you can't drink you'll stop thinking about drinking.

tomsteve

cant say i was able to ignore the thoughts before they disappeared. i accepted them as thoughts that years of drinking proved to be false thoughts.
they disappeared as i worked the program of AA if i didnt do anything to change myself i dont think they would have left.

snitch

In the early days, weeks and months (I am 14 months sober now) when I wanted to drink (which was everyday!) I would say the serenity prayer over and over (many, many times a day)

God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change. And I would say out loud, I am an alcoholic and I cannot drink safely or moderately. This is a FACT and I cannot change it.

The Courage to change the things I can... I can change my attitude about alcohol. Instead of romancing it, THINK about the damage it has done to me, the pain it has caused me. One little drink is the SINGLE cause of all my pain and misery. Courage to get to AA meetings, to pick up the phone to another alcoholic, to share how I am feeling. To ask for help.

And the wisdom to know the difference! The difference being what I have control over and what I do not. And i have zero control once I put alcohol in my body.

And now, even though the thoughts are much much less, they still come. I am an alcoholic. Most if the time they are fleeting and I just tell them to do one, but tbe serenity prayer still works!

AAPJ

"No person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death."

Gottalife

I have sincerely done that, except that it was done for me rather than by me. Like Tomsteve above, I worked the program of AA and in that process the problem was removed. There are a bunch of promises about it int the big book.

IMO, not drinking is a form of controlled drinking. Not drinking just for today often turns out to be just time between drinks.

The AA program is very clear. The spiritual experience resulting from the steps is also described as a change of personality sufficient to overcome alcoholism . It also notes that such a change could hardly have been brought about by ourselves alone. Such an experience comes from a very specific course of action vastly more comprehensive than "just don't drink and go to meetings".

All this is not to say that we should not exercise all our power to avoid the first drink in the early days. It is just that we know our power alone isn't enough and unless we get into action on a program of recovery, our situation will be precarious to say the least.

August252015

I didn't quit drinking til I quit.

Zero thoughts about maybe I can ever drink again, at least as of today.

Step 1 - plus knowing I will die if I ever drink again = freedom from those thoughts.

DJ1

I also never ignored them for 10 years I kept relapsing after a few months thinking I was cured & could be a normal drinker !! & each time the getting sober was harder especially this last time the withdrawals alone I will remind myself every time when I think I can be. A social drinker just can’t do it

Sohard

totfit

I don't have those thoughts and at one point, I wondered if I was hopeless. I could tell you they were "beaten out of me", which is partly true. I don't know really. At some point the thought that "I had this under control and could drink", just became hilarious. I hope this is always the same, but for some time seeing someone drinking and the thought of me doing the same just brings literally a chuckle. The thought that I would ever be able to drink "normally" or even without a total disaster is just ridiculous. There are an exponentially greater number of other things I can do than drink, the longer I stay sober. My body does not react to alcohol in a way that I can successfully drink, nor ever will. That is all there is to it. That fact will not change.

MyLittleHorsie

I don't ignore them, they are pretty fleeting. Usually it is a chuckle, like why would I even think that.
They happen, I acknowledge them, remind myself why I cannot drink, remind myself how gross it tastes and move on.

WeThinkNot

I've found what works the best for me is building a life so much better than before that the thought of drinking is repulsive to me.

Suppose a genie waved a wand at me and told me I was cured of addiction and could drink like a normie from now on. I'm happy, healthy, and sane these days. Why would I drink something that would make me less happy, healthy, and sane?

Callas

I never wanted to drink normally and I still don’t want to. I want to drink untill I am drunk. So I do not think of trying to drink normally as that has no appeal. I also do not think of getting drunk as that is no longer an option.

Stayingsassy

I’ve found that over time, sobriety has also become similar to aversion therapy in my brain. If I entertain what drinking would taste and feel like, I don’t want it. The taste or the high.

Over time your love for the taste and the feeling can actually wane.

I’ve entertained it down to the thinking of the actual act of it during sobriety and found that I don’t desire it anymore. Your mileage may vary here, I’ve done quite a brainwashing on myself.

Sohard