Motivation slipping
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 36
Motivation slipping
Hello everyone,
I feel my motivation beginning to wane so thought I'd post here.
I stopped drinking on the 1st of March. Since then I made the decision to drink once at a family meal (on the 1st of April).
I learnt from that experience that I get zero pleasure from one drink. If I'm to drink it's to get totally drunk. The following day I understood the reason why I get stuck drinking every evening. Because the next day I felt anxious and low and craved drink that evening to help alleviate it. I didn't drink and got back into the sober mindset the following day.
Anyway I was (and still am) enjoying my sobriety. But I still feel an emptiness as I'm missing the enjoyment it brought me at the weekend celebrating the end of a working week. My alcoholic voice is niggling me with the idea of having one day a month where I drink - telling me I'll be able to get right back on track afterwards like I did after the family meal. Or that now I'm working full-time I can drink one night a week and avoid alcohol during the week. I know everyone says it'll creep back up. Anyway any shared experiences will be appreciated. Thanks everyone - you've been a great help to me x
I feel my motivation beginning to wane so thought I'd post here.
I stopped drinking on the 1st of March. Since then I made the decision to drink once at a family meal (on the 1st of April).
I learnt from that experience that I get zero pleasure from one drink. If I'm to drink it's to get totally drunk. The following day I understood the reason why I get stuck drinking every evening. Because the next day I felt anxious and low and craved drink that evening to help alleviate it. I didn't drink and got back into the sober mindset the following day.
Anyway I was (and still am) enjoying my sobriety. But I still feel an emptiness as I'm missing the enjoyment it brought me at the weekend celebrating the end of a working week. My alcoholic voice is niggling me with the idea of having one day a month where I drink - telling me I'll be able to get right back on track afterwards like I did after the family meal. Or that now I'm working full-time I can drink one night a week and avoid alcohol during the week. I know everyone says it'll creep back up. Anyway any shared experiences will be appreciated. Thanks everyone - you've been a great help to me x
Sober AF Since 3/20/16
Join Date: Jan 2016
Location: WI - Where alcohol abuse is a sacrement
Posts: 157
Well, if you're like me (and a lot of other folks here), it simply won't work. You won't be able to maintain your "one night per month" or whatever permission slip you write for yourself. The next day, you'll wake up hung over, your motivation shot, your head pounding, full of regret and your anxiety levels off the charts over the thought of having to wait an entire month in order to do it again. You'll end up deviating from your rules - "just this one time". And again. And again. And again...
My advice? Find something you enjoy more and focus on that. Celebrate your weekends with that instead.
My advice? Find something you enjoy more and focus on that. Celebrate your weekends with that instead.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: W Washington
Posts: 11,589
Because the next day I felt anxious and low and craved drink that evening to help alleviate it.
you can see how this would go right? if you decided to try to be an on again/off again/once in awhile drinker? you'd FORCE yourself to only drink ONE day and then you'd be MISERABLE trying not to give into the cravings that would immediately follow. that's like saying so while you are getting that root canal without any Novocaine, i'm gonna shove these bamboo shoots under your nails. ok???
so you've taken drinking off the table. that is not the only way one can celebrate things. you could explore lots of other ideas.
and besides, let's get real......that isn't why you drank anyways..........
you can see how this would go right? if you decided to try to be an on again/off again/once in awhile drinker? you'd FORCE yourself to only drink ONE day and then you'd be MISERABLE trying not to give into the cravings that would immediately follow. that's like saying so while you are getting that root canal without any Novocaine, i'm gonna shove these bamboo shoots under your nails. ok???
so you've taken drinking off the table. that is not the only way one can celebrate things. you could explore lots of other ideas.
and besides, let's get real......that isn't why you drank anyways..........
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 36
Thanks for your replies. They help.
I need to acknowledge that one night drinking might be great but that it'll lead to another and another. And I'll end up how I was. Over a year without a single alcohol free night.
I don't know how I managed even one night stopping drinking in March. I had made hundreds of promises to quit before then but had talked myself into drinking come 8pm.
I cherish my days sober. I look at what I've accomplished in this short time. I have planted a flower garden. I created a piece of art I'm proud of. I have lost 12lbs. I'm not as angry. I'm addressing my health concerns. I have been told i look 'radiant'. I am making extra money working mornings at the weekend. I have made a new friend who I exercise with. Listing it makes me excited for my sobriety. Thanks for helping me straighten out my thoughts.
I need to acknowledge that one night drinking might be great but that it'll lead to another and another. And I'll end up how I was. Over a year without a single alcohol free night.
I don't know how I managed even one night stopping drinking in March. I had made hundreds of promises to quit before then but had talked myself into drinking come 8pm.
I cherish my days sober. I look at what I've accomplished in this short time. I have planted a flower garden. I created a piece of art I'm proud of. I have lost 12lbs. I'm not as angry. I'm addressing my health concerns. I have been told i look 'radiant'. I am making extra money working mornings at the weekend. I have made a new friend who I exercise with. Listing it makes me excited for my sobriety. Thanks for helping me straighten out my thoughts.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Recovery can't be based on our motivation to be sober. Motivation wanes. A commitment to sobriety has to withstand the ups and downs of "feeling like it" for it to succeed. Listing the positives of sobriety is a good way to remind us that the benefits of not drinking outweigh drinking and staying sober outweighs any promise our addiction makes.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 982
Hi maz, your last post says it all. You've accomplished so much in a short time. I'm on day 28 and have experienced many similar positives changes.
Le'ts stop thinking about drinking and enjoy life. Somebody wrote it recently....I don't have time to drink, I've got s**t to do!!
Le'ts stop thinking about drinking and enjoy life. Somebody wrote it recently....I don't have time to drink, I've got s**t to do!!
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