trachemys

^^^What he said. I get an hour in the sun everyday on breaks and lunch, not counting driving time when the sun's shining. Get out there. After all, Cows are outdoor animals.

puffy

Cow I listen to Howard Stern and there is a wrap up show with Jon Hein and Gary. And the other day Dr. Drew who has been on the show sat in. Robin Quivers also dropped in. The were discussing who has the biggest issues Robin or Howard. And Robin and Drew brought up the fact that Howard can not enjoy anything and that he is in a lot of pain. Even if he loves to do something at the same time he hates to do it. He has been in psychotherapy for years and talks about it often. Anyhow Drew said that he suffers from anhedonia and went on to explain what it was and meant. It was brief but it definitely caught my attention.

Thanks Yellow, Too Stabs and Elsker- I still have 1 more Nov 12 then I'm done with chemo. TS- I have breast cancer stage 2 and am now going through the process of making it "Go Away!"

Cow

I agrees Walk and Trach, but I burn fast and has already have pre-cancers cut off. So, have to find balance. I not can take too much more sun, so was try to boost levels with supplement.

Elsk, I hope I get more too. Once you experience little bit of relief from chronic depressions and anhedonia is like giving person dying of thirst little sip of water ...then take it away. Is both hopeful and cruel. And not get me started how friends is like, SEE, you can feel good if only you want to! Um, no. I just sitting there and my brain chemical align for whatever reason, is not cuz I "try really hard" or something.

Puff, that is pretty good description, and I can total see that in Stern. He smart and funny but you never hear HIM laugh and seem to be amuse or enjoy. But because he make other laugh nobody notice too much. I relates.

Della1968

Best wishes Puffy....glad you are on the other side of the battle.

Cow did the Dr have any suggestions regarding the Vitamin D? I am sorry you can't tolerate it because I truly believe it helps.

Cow

Doctor say stop take it due to side effect. Now, maybe in couple week I try even smaller dose. But obvious if is any cardiac side effect, is not gonna be possible. I get no such side effect from sun, but sun produce lot other responses in body, so that tell me is probable supplement create imbalance. I does take K2 and Mag to offset that. But is so many co-factor and synergies with everything in the body, that I does think any pill or supplement is like baby tinker with chemistry set.

Is you find depression relief from the D?

trachemys

Cow, I remember a family vacation a few years back when my Dad said something to me about "see how you can drink responsibly?". I'd been drinking mulled wine all day with the occasional trip to the truck for a shot of vodka. All. Day. Hammered. And still managed to save Thanksgiving dinner when my sister freaked over her heroin using husband.

Because of the booze, I wasn't depressed or anxious or desperate. I was numbed.

This year, we took another vacation together. Beach time. I totally relaxed without booze. I could nap on command. I was happy all the time. If someone asked let's do something I said sure. Kinda stunned them that I wasn't trying to escape them or get a drink. I think my Dad kinda freaked when we played golf and I passed up the beer cart. Woulda been my free pass moment.

Between not drinking and taking my meds, I've got some balance. It ain't all rainbow colored butterfly kittens but life ain't bad.

Sometimes, the simplicity of good times evades us.

Cow

Love that story, Trach. One of things I most like about being sober is, when somebody want to does something or need help or call out of blue, I can "respond" and not has to make up lies or hide.

I will total settle for simplicity of "good." I not looking for rose-scented butterfly farts.

PS. Wait a minute, you plays golf?!

trachemys

I used to play a LOT of golf. The most zen-like activity that involves movement.

And I just made a Cow quote my signature.

Della1968

I do 10 times as much sober as I ever did drinking. .

You have come so far Cow I hope you realize this following your posts all this time I see so many subtle differences and it makes me smile.

Cow

Is sometime easier for outsider to see you progress than you self, especial when you not feeling so good yet, so thank you, Della.

Trach, I honored, I mean, that not as good as "Death AND Cops!" or whatever last one was, but decent. I has play golf before. Real golf. (Though I prefers the miniature with the tiny windmills.) I excellent with chip and putt, but suck at driving. Am so bad that last time I ever play, Golf Police actual ride out in they little cart and accuse me of PURPOSELY screwing around and hold up course, cuz nobody could possible be as bad as me for real. That when you know it time to hang it up. And I not even drunk that day!

trachemys

Hitting a golf ball is the most unnatural act of a human being ever conceived. You take a ridiculously tiny ball, grab a strangely bent stick and try to hit it to a target 600 to 1000 feet away.

Hill of Death got nothing on that. Except mortal consequences

Yellow1111

Geesh, I was away for a couple days and now I see Howard Stern? I LOVE him. But, it's a secret. We were at a dinner party last year, and I was seated next to a brain surgeon. Someone asked "What would be something that would surprise us about you, Yellow." I immediately said, "I listen to and love Howard Stern. But never say a word of this, or I will call you a liar." My friend chimed in, "Don't worry, probably everyone here has the same secret." I don't love the "other players" and sidekicks they bring on or have call in, but his interviews are the best. I agree with Cow, you don't hear him laugh. Except in a sort of awkward, almost painful way on occasion.

Golf, in my opinion, is the WORST *sport* ever. What trach said. I have 3 step brothers all pro golfers...they tried for years to teach me. Last time I threw the club screaming "phu&K this stupid phu&cking a$$aholic game!!!!" I was never invited for another try and the site of courses make me sick. Tennis, however, makes sense and is perfect.
XOX
Yellow

puffy

Yellow- I agree Howard's interviews are like no other. Also, the caliber of people he has been interviewing has been stellar and they themselves walk away fans if not already. I think he uses what he learns in his psychotherapy to get to knowing the interviewee's makeup. He is a way different radio host than he was 15 years ago and even longer for that matter but I think it also has something to do with meeting his wife, Beth. Be proud of being a fan. Others don't know what they are missing.

Cow

I never find Stern to be "funny" but he definite smart and interesting.

Then again, I rarely find anybody funny, so probable just me. I did find Colbert Show to be usual pretty funny, but alas, it no more.

Yellow1111

Ok, Puff, officially loud and proud here. I've had a couple slips where I was picking my kids up at their very conservative school...forgot it was on. Principal walks kids to car and my daughter looks mortified, then I realize, "Oh, bad timing!" ha.

I think you're correct that he's really improved..Perhaps having "license" to be as offensive as can be on Sirius has allowed him to dig deeper as well. He's obviously very bright and I appreciate that. Neurotic, for sure. Anyone seeking psychiatric help 3x per week, well...That's pretty excessive. I think it's rare to find anyone at the very top of their game, any very high achiever, that does not also possess a large amount of strange, atypical, and peculiar qualities!

Hope you're feeling alright today.
Vitamin D for all!
XO
ps. I also like South Park. shhh.

Della1968

I love South Park and Family Guy.

Cow

Teddy from my FB show is base on Butters, and Cow will always have soft spot in heart for Cartman. I not think show nearly as good as used to be, but I impress they spending entire season (so far) to go after PCness, social medias, and Whole Foods. Older Southpark episode like when they forms Christian Rock band base on pop songs ("You once, twice, three times my Savior") just can no be topped.

In all of sitcoms, this one probable my favorite episode of any (it play in total in short segments here on youtube.) All of "IT Crowd" Series 3 very good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=218s...86DAAEB01CCC78

trachemys

Sorry, nothing will ever top:

Yellow1111

Yes! I rarely watch SP anymore, but loved the old ones. My younger sister turned me on to the movie so long ago. At first I was saying, "I cannot watch this. How totally moronic and foul mouthed." Within 20 min I'd gone to the dark side. The "uncle" song was the game changer. Brilliant. No one I knew would entertain it was indeed hysterical. I called my now husband to tell him the great find...he was not amused. Upon watching, however, changed is mind. THANK GODS!

120degrees0ut

HI COW! Bubbles and Cake and Laughter and Fun! That is Adorable! I like your cool Poem...