They Think They Know
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 729
Originally Posted by coastalgirl 
Don't you just hate it when friends, family members, or even people you don't even know think they understand alcoholism entirely!? In the past week, I heard a friend say, "I think it's 100% the person's choice to keep drinking [after the first sip]... The person has control." And then someone else I know (and trust very much normally) said he thinks that EVERYONE has a form of alcoholism. That irked me, because I felt like it belittled my situation/illness. Has anyone made you upset recently like this? I get that I should ignore them, but sometimes their words make me second guess myself and my choices now that I am sober...
In his approach everyone who drinks is alcoholic and it is a choice.
I agree 100% with the above statements.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
i find this issue with lots of stuff not just alcoholism. Lot of experts out there that cant wait to learn you something or keep you beneath there knowledge base or simply elevate themselves by pushing you down and standing on you.
I hear a preacher once who actually had a coke issue at one time in his life ramble on about how alcohlism is not a disease and that we are just irresponsable etc.. basicly made it sound as if we could all just simply recover just by snapping our fingers. I wanted to deck him his whole point of view on the topic lacked any sense of compassion etc... But whatever to each his own.
I think you gotta be firm in your stance on things in life and be humble enough to realize you could be wrong so keep checking yourself. But you cant allow people to belittle you and put you down either generally they are doing such things for there own personal benefit not yours.
I hear a preacher once who actually had a coke issue at one time in his life ramble on about how alcohlism is not a disease and that we are just irresponsable etc.. basicly made it sound as if we could all just simply recover just by snapping our fingers. I wanted to deck him his whole point of view on the topic lacked any sense of compassion etc... But whatever to each his own.
I think you gotta be firm in your stance on things in life and be humble enough to realize you could be wrong so keep checking yourself. But you cant allow people to belittle you and put you down either generally they are doing such things for there own personal benefit not yours.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,229
i think many people walk into there social circle look around and figure out how they can be on top of everyone there in some way shape or form. and those they cant seem to conquer they ignore but those they can they gladly push down and stand on. Gotta watch for these types I think.
Self recovered Self discovered
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 5,148
I didn't have any control over my drinking until I decided that I did. Until that time, everyone who told me that I could quit was a moron because I was the only one who knew the whole story. Idiots.
One day the penny dropped for me. I made the decision I was done, that there was nothing for me any longer with alcohol. There was no situation or feeling that could not be made worse by drinking. I was so tired of being sick and drunk all the time.
I quit drinking. You can quit drinking too.
One day the penny dropped for me. I made the decision I was done, that there was nothing for me any longer with alcohol. There was no situation or feeling that could not be made worse by drinking. I was so tired of being sick and drunk all the time.
I quit drinking. You can quit drinking too.
under new management
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 2,339
Originally Posted by Stang
I tend to see it that way up until taking the first drink. Choice is shot to hell after that. That's why I choose to not take the first dink now. Most people do not understand that. They see it from their own perspective which is drinking moderately . I've never seen the point of moderate drinking.
No drink, no pit to fill.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by doggonecarl
A lot of alcoholics don't understand therir own alcoholism. I see it every day on Sober Recovery.
A lot of alcoholics don't understand therir own alcoholism. I see it every day on Sober Recovery.
Another Day in Paradise
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Upland, CA
Posts: 900
After a few years of sobriety I have come to understand one thing about myself.
In the beginning I wanted to be different, be special, be misunderstood so I COULD EXCUSE MYSELF and my drinking. If I was special and woefully misunderstood then I wasn't failing at getting my life in order and the fault lay with my "disease."
Years ago a fellow recovered alcoholic told me, "Don't drink and all the rest of the issues that you are hiding from will be easier to work with. You are NOT special you are simply a garden variety drunk!" That advice for some reason slapped me in the face and I made up my mind that no matter what I wouldn't drink, and from sitting under a dining room table to keep a table leg in each hand so I couldn't pick up a bottle, to taking 2 and sometimes 3 hour walks to stay away from a car and a ride to the liquor store I didn't drink. Went to a lot of AA meetings as well. It got easier and now several years later alcohol is just something I used to drink. However solving, or trying to solve day to day problems just like the rest of the world is an everyday challenge. Getting sober didn't uncomplicate my life, it just made it easier to deal with.
The point of this long winded writing is that in my case, and it is the only case I feel qualified to comment on, I had to just answer to myself, no one else. If I drank it was because I chose to. Alcohol was no longer the problem, my choice to drink it was. I had to have a plan when drinking seemed like a good idea. I didn't need and shouldn't explain why I drank to others. If I didn't drink no explanation was even required. When people who knew about my drinking wanted to talk about it I simply said, "I am working on it."
Just random thoughts on a Friday.
Be well and good luck,
Jon
In the beginning I wanted to be different, be special, be misunderstood so I COULD EXCUSE MYSELF and my drinking. If I was special and woefully misunderstood then I wasn't failing at getting my life in order and the fault lay with my "disease."
Years ago a fellow recovered alcoholic told me, "Don't drink and all the rest of the issues that you are hiding from will be easier to work with. You are NOT special you are simply a garden variety drunk!" That advice for some reason slapped me in the face and I made up my mind that no matter what I wouldn't drink, and from sitting under a dining room table to keep a table leg in each hand so I couldn't pick up a bottle, to taking 2 and sometimes 3 hour walks to stay away from a car and a ride to the liquor store I didn't drink. Went to a lot of AA meetings as well. It got easier and now several years later alcohol is just something I used to drink. However solving, or trying to solve day to day problems just like the rest of the world is an everyday challenge. Getting sober didn't uncomplicate my life, it just made it easier to deal with.
The point of this long winded writing is that in my case, and it is the only case I feel qualified to comment on, I had to just answer to myself, no one else. If I drank it was because I chose to. Alcohol was no longer the problem, my choice to drink it was. I had to have a plan when drinking seemed like a good idea. I didn't need and shouldn't explain why I drank to others. If I didn't drink no explanation was even required. When people who knew about my drinking wanted to talk about it I simply said, "I am working on it."
Just random thoughts on a Friday.
Be well and good luck,
Jon
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