Being a Sponsor ?
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Near Scranton PA
Posts: 424
Boy, like most questions the only accurate answer is, "It depends". I know one guy who had multiple sponsees when he only had 90 days. I hope that works out for all involved but I know I wouldn;t recommend it.
I have seven months, working on Step 8, and I KNOW I'm not a candidate for being a sponsor. I figure a sponsor would have, at very least,to have completed all the steps once. And, dare I say, be relatively secure in their sobriety.
Then again, just piling up time might not be the best indicator. While somebody might have their act together and be an excellent sponsor in 2012, does that mean they're going to have the same quality of sobriety in 2014? I think it demands honest self-examination. And probably the input of THEIR sponsor.
Sponsorship is a big deal, real responsobility, and shouldn;t be entered into lightly.
I have seven months, working on Step 8, and I KNOW I'm not a candidate for being a sponsor. I figure a sponsor would have, at very least,to have completed all the steps once. And, dare I say, be relatively secure in their sobriety.
Then again, just piling up time might not be the best indicator. While somebody might have their act together and be an excellent sponsor in 2012, does that mean they're going to have the same quality of sobriety in 2014? I think it demands honest self-examination. And probably the input of THEIR sponsor.
Sponsorship is a big deal, real responsobility, and shouldn;t be entered into lightly.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Richmond,Va.
Posts: 183
A general rule of thumb is to have 2 years of sobriety,have made all your ammends and be happy with your sobriety.I would add also,having a sponsor who has a sponsor,belonging to a home group and being active in service.
The first 2-5 years in AA are an apprenticeship and then the work begins.I know in the early days of AA this was not possible,but it is a sound guideline today.
Feel free to dispute,I put it out for discussion.
Cheers,Steve
The first 2-5 years in AA are an apprenticeship and then the work begins.I know in the early days of AA this was not possible,but it is a sound guideline today.
Feel free to dispute,I put it out for discussion.
Cheers,Steve
Adventures In SpaceTime
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Posts: 5,827
I don't think its really about quantity of clean time, rather its all about quality of life sans alcohol.
If an AA sponsor:
* embraces and completes the 12 steps program, and lives those steps in his or her daily affairs
* acknowledges a psychic change which removes the drinking problem and allows for a revolution in living a changed life sans alcohol resulting in a ongoing recovered life and/or a life of recovery
* can demonstrate and share those real life changes and challenges, and is already receiving the promises in some measure as a result of their progress
* can actually pass on what they have learned to others in a way which can be readily grasped and ASAP embraced by sponsees without requiring an otherwise enduring sponsor-sponsee relationship to the respective sponsor
* has no personal axe to grind with other AA members who may choose to not follow the respective sponsor's personal example, and so therefor the sponsor accepts Live and Let Live as a practical solution for such disagreements
All the above is what I would want in a sponsor if I wanted a sponsor with quality AA sobriety to guide me and help me achieve my own measure of sobriety. When I did agree to sponsor, all the above is what I offered my sponsees, and no less then the above.
If an AA sponsor:
* embraces and completes the 12 steps program, and lives those steps in his or her daily affairs
* acknowledges a psychic change which removes the drinking problem and allows for a revolution in living a changed life sans alcohol resulting in a ongoing recovered life and/or a life of recovery
* can demonstrate and share those real life changes and challenges, and is already receiving the promises in some measure as a result of their progress
* can actually pass on what they have learned to others in a way which can be readily grasped and ASAP embraced by sponsees without requiring an otherwise enduring sponsor-sponsee relationship to the respective sponsor
* has no personal axe to grind with other AA members who may choose to not follow the respective sponsor's personal example, and so therefor the sponsor accepts Live and Let Live as a practical solution for such disagreements
All the above is what I would want in a sponsor if I wanted a sponsor with quality AA sobriety to guide me and help me achieve my own measure of sobriety. When I did agree to sponsor, all the above is what I offered my sponsees, and no less then the above.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,146
My first guy had 2 years 4 months when I asked him. He was making his amends, showing up regularly and putting 10-12 in practice.
Glad I didn't ask some lump who just hadn't drank for a few years. No answer for me there.
Glad I didn't ask some lump who just hadn't drank for a few years. No answer for me there.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: uk
Posts: 2,548
The first 2-5 years in AA are an apprenticeship and then the work begins
As for sponsorship, its all a matter of whether you live it, or talk it.
plenty of people talk a good program....and i can include myself in that for a few years,
I have to agree with the list robbie posted and have little to add.
My own personal experience is this.......i know a great sponsor, whom has recovered and is currently taking women through the book, 6 ish weeks sober.
My sponsor has less sobriety years than me.....makes no difference...he has a manner of living (discipline) that i have found difficult to achieve in the past year or two.......perfect for me...
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
By 8 months, I had been guided through the steps 3 times, amends completed by 9 months. I have been sponsoring another woman since I reached about 9 months of sobriety. I work with my sponsor and specifically with my higher power; it's not my opinions being given, it's what has been working for me along with a lot of prayer and meditation. My sponsor runs things by their sponsor not only for sponsoring me, but also for helping with my sponsee. I don't do it alone. She's sober today and she's been guided through the steps once, so far.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by Spawn 
How much clean time do you think a person should have before they become a "Sponsor" ?
"Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we carry this message to alcoholics..."
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Ontario
Posts: 806
I think 3 - 5 years is a good guide line provided they have done the work themselves.
It takes up to 2 years for post acute withdrawals to subside.
And there also is this phenomena that happens during this time frame (2 years) as well?
" Everyone wants to be a sponsor or counselor. "
One should wait until this phenomena passes!
An old timer once pointed out to me how serious being a sponsor can be.
He shared a story about how he found one of his sponsee's home with 2 slashed wrists and how it affected him.
Alcoholism is not to be taken lightly and one should fully understand what they could be getting into.
It takes up to 2 years for post acute withdrawals to subside.
And there also is this phenomena that happens during this time frame (2 years) as well?
" Everyone wants to be a sponsor or counselor. "
One should wait until this phenomena passes!
An old timer once pointed out to me how serious being a sponsor can be.
He shared a story about how he found one of his sponsee's home with 2 slashed wrists and how it affected him.
Alcoholism is not to be taken lightly and one should fully understand what they could be getting into.
Gone In
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 223
Originally Posted by Spawn
...An old timer once pointed out to me how serious being a sponsor can be.
He shared a story about how he found one of his sponsee's home with 2 slashed wrists and how it affected him.
Alcoholism is not to be taken lightly and one should fully understand what they could be getting into.
He shared a story about how he found one of his sponsee's home with 2 slashed wrists and how it affected him.
Alcoholism is not to be taken lightly and one should fully understand what they could be getting into.
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by BASEjumper
...You open yourself up to a lot of bad stuff being a sponsor, it's good idea to think twice before volunteering.
IMO spiritual growth is the direct result of walking through fear, adversity and failure from the perspective of a student, rather than from the perspective of a victim.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Here is what AA says about sponsorship....
Alcoholics Anonymous : Pamphlets
Many meetings have this on their free literature rack...
Alcoholics Anonymous : Pamphlets
Many meetings have this on their free literature rack...
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
I can't open PDF files, but I'll read a copy I get from a meeting. Here's Clarence S.'s take on sponsorship from 1944 (I'm enjoying history today).
A.A. Sponsorship Pamphlet, 1944, by Clarence S.
A.A. Sponsorship Pamphlet, 1944, by Clarence S.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
I can't open PDF files, but I'll read a copy I get from a meeting. Here's Clarence S.'s take on sponsorship from 1944 (I'm enjoying history today).
A.A. Sponsorship Pamphlet, 1944, by Clarence S.
A.A. Sponsorship Pamphlet, 1944, by Clarence S.
Sugarbear, Adobe Reader is free : Adobe - Adobe Reader download - All versions
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Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 142
Originally Posted by BASEjumper
I'm not an AA guy, but that statement makes a lot of sense to me. You open yourself up to a lot of bad stuff being a sponsor, it's good idea to think twice before volunteering. I'm sure there are other ways of being of service in AA than being a sponsor.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
I have adobe reader, it's a realllllly sloooowwww connection and a reallllly ollllld laptop. I got the other one to turn on again, but now I can't get it to turn on today. It beats the phone~ 3" screen....
but, I will attempt a new download...
but, I will attempt a new download...
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