Back again after years sobriety!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by feelingdown 
Sorry to lol, but.... 'ass falls off'.... just totally cracked me up! Love it and am going to remember it if I get tempted.
Em, re the heart rate thing - at one point I was regularly topping a 120 bpm (I'm 37 yo) without any real anxiety - I was quite worried, but also had a normal EKG. It seems to have passed now and I never really had a proper answer to what caused it (I was still binge drinking from time to time at the time, though).
Anyway, what I did find of help was distraction and relaxation. You found gardening helped, which is both distraction and relaxation. I can also recommend watching a really good, funny film, reading an engrossing book, taking a hot bubble bath, making a really good proper cup of tea (tea leaves, make a little ritual of it, that sort of thing) generally anything that makes you feel good about yourself. I echo others, if you are worried about it or it seems to be getting worse, get thyne ass to the docs again.
Take care.
Em, re the heart rate thing - at one point I was regularly topping a 120 bpm (I'm 37 yo) without any real anxiety - I was quite worried, but also had a normal EKG. It seems to have passed now and I never really had a proper answer to what caused it (I was still binge drinking from time to time at the time, though).
Anyway, what I did find of help was distraction and relaxation. You found gardening helped, which is both distraction and relaxation. I can also recommend watching a really good, funny film, reading an engrossing book, taking a hot bubble bath, making a really good proper cup of tea (tea leaves, make a little ritual of it, that sort of thing) generally anything that makes you feel good about yourself. I echo others, if you are worried about it or it seems to be getting worse, get thyne ass to the docs again.
Take care.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
Fantastic for the Five years. Time to start again!!
Hope your post has helped anyone on the brink of a drink or thinking of the future.
Hope the panic settles down , just been through that this weekend looking at my kids whilst having an attack awfull.
Good luck.
Great to have the music to flow through. Does that help with the panic attacks ?
John.
Hope your post has helped anyone on the brink of a drink or thinking of the future.
Hope the panic settles down , just been through that this weekend looking at my kids whilst having an attack awfull.
Good luck.
Great to have the music to flow through. Does that help with the panic attacks ?
John.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Spinach
Fantastic for the Five years. Time to start again!!
Hope your post has helped anyone on the brink of a drink or thinking of the future.
Hope the panic settles down , just been through that this weekend looking at my kids whilst having an attack awfull.
Good luck.
Great to have the music to flow through. Does that help with the panic attacks ?
John.
Hope your post has helped anyone on the brink of a drink or thinking of the future.
Hope the panic settles down , just been through that this weekend looking at my kids whilst having an attack awfull.
Good luck.
Great to have the music to flow through. Does that help with the panic attacks ?
John.
Like you say - AWFUL
Music is pulling me through this a lot, but there is always a point where I associate the music with a glass of Chianti. I am not giving up music, I am giving up Chianti, at least for today. I too hope this helps some folks out there who are considering picking up again.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,126
Hey, Joe. welcome back. I too suffer from panic, depression, extreme anxiety, etc.
I understand you are 35 miles away from a meeting, and farther from a quality meeting, but I was wondering if you could give it a try to zero in on one guy that just might be a sponsor for you?
And something I have learned in just a year-and-a-half in the rooms is that working the steps is a daily affair.
Thanks for your post.
Oh, regarding palpitations and such, are you on a beta blocker? I think that works for me better than benzos, and I had a 10 year run on Klonopin (clonazepam) and detoxed from a prescribed dose of 20 milligrams a day.
As far as permanent damage to your heart, my detox involved four trips to the ER with BP and heart rate at stroke levels. Please don't sweat a concern of permanent damage. did your doctor give you an EKG?
Even with your previous run in with benzo detox, I suspect a couple days worth of it can't be harmful, but I am certainly no doctor and am not offering you any medical advice.
And if you are on VA disability, have you thought of applying for Social Security disability?
Good luck and thanks for coming back.
I understand you are 35 miles away from a meeting, and farther from a quality meeting, but I was wondering if you could give it a try to zero in on one guy that just might be a sponsor for you?
And something I have learned in just a year-and-a-half in the rooms is that working the steps is a daily affair.
Thanks for your post.
Oh, regarding palpitations and such, are you on a beta blocker? I think that works for me better than benzos, and I had a 10 year run on Klonopin (clonazepam) and detoxed from a prescribed dose of 20 milligrams a day.
As far as permanent damage to your heart, my detox involved four trips to the ER with BP and heart rate at stroke levels. Please don't sweat a concern of permanent damage. did your doctor give you an EKG?
Even with your previous run in with benzo detox, I suspect a couple days worth of it can't be harmful, but I am certainly no doctor and am not offering you any medical advice.
And if you are on VA disability, have you thought of applying for Social Security disability?
Good luck and thanks for coming back.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 694
Welcome back Joe,
I've always heard the fuse never grows back, just gets shorter and burns faster, after it's put out we can never light it again or it starts where it was before.
Ive experienced that myself after 3 months, this site really helps, I hope you stick around, we could learn a lot from you.
I've always heard the fuse never grows back, just gets shorter and burns faster, after it's put out we can never light it again or it starts where it was before.
Ive experienced that myself after 3 months, this site really helps, I hope you stick around, we could learn a lot from you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by MemphisBlues
Hey, Joe. welcome back. I too suffer from panic, depression, extreme anxiety, etc.
I understand you are 35 miles away from a meeting, and farther from a quality meeting, but I was wondering if you could give it a try to zero in on one guy that just might be a sponsor for you?
And something I have learned in just a year-and-a-half in the rooms is that working the steps is a daily affair.
Thanks for your post.
Oh, regarding palpitations and such, are you on a beta blocker? I think that works for me better than benzos, and I had a 10 year run on Klonopin (clonazepam) and detoxed from a prescribed dose of 20 milligrams a day.
As far as permanent damage to your heart, my detox involved four trips to the ER with BP and heart rate at stroke levels. Please don't sweat a concern of permanent damage. did your doctor give you an EKG?
Even with your previous run in with benzo detox, I suspect a couple days worth of it can't be harmful, but I am certainly no doctor and am not offering you any medical advice.
And if you are on VA disability, have you thought of applying for Social Security disability?
Good luck and thanks for coming back.
I understand you are 35 miles away from a meeting, and farther from a quality meeting, but I was wondering if you could give it a try to zero in on one guy that just might be a sponsor for you?
And something I have learned in just a year-and-a-half in the rooms is that working the steps is a daily affair.
Thanks for your post.
Oh, regarding palpitations and such, are you on a beta blocker? I think that works for me better than benzos, and I had a 10 year run on Klonopin (clonazepam) and detoxed from a prescribed dose of 20 milligrams a day.
As far as permanent damage to your heart, my detox involved four trips to the ER with BP and heart rate at stroke levels. Please don't sweat a concern of permanent damage. did your doctor give you an EKG?
Even with your previous run in with benzo detox, I suspect a couple days worth of it can't be harmful, but I am certainly no doctor and am not offering you any medical advice.
And if you are on VA disability, have you thought of applying for Social Security disability?
Good luck and thanks for coming back.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by SomethingBetter
Welcome back Joe,
I've always heard the fuse never grows back, just gets shorter and burns faster, after it's put out we can never light it again or it starts where it was before.
Ive experienced that myself after 3 months, this site really helps, I hope you stick around, we could learn a lot from you.
I've always heard the fuse never grows back, just gets shorter and burns faster, after it's put out we can never light it again or it starts where it was before.
Ive experienced that myself after 3 months, this site really helps, I hope you stick around, we could learn a lot from you.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Wales UK
Posts: 859
Hey Bluesman, Just last night we had a talk of what I should have as a special drink , my wife drinks Fizzy wine Cava One bottle opened on Friday and poured away on Weds if any left. She offered to stop drinking but it seems unfair. She's also got to trust I won't drink it .
So she mentioned what do you want as a treat drink one the kids cant have or that has my "name on it" one with something about it. Now I love apple and elderflower juice and I thought that was good as its quite sweet and has a certain something . Now reading your post I saw an old single teapot of mine and realised that's it tea but with a ceremony .
That's maybe what you need a drink with a ceremony to replace the chianti.
John.
So she mentioned what do you want as a treat drink one the kids cant have or that has my "name on it" one with something about it. Now I love apple and elderflower juice and I thought that was good as its quite sweet and has a certain something . Now reading your post I saw an old single teapot of mine and realised that's it tea but with a ceremony .
That's maybe what you need a drink with a ceremony to replace the chianti.
John.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Bethlehem, PA.
Posts: 1,781
What I discovered after dancing with this thing we call alcoholism for 3 decades is that your body and mind seem to have a finite amount of recovery cycles available. In my 20's I could go on a bender of epic proportions and shake it off in 3 or 4 days.
As time marches on and the decades roll by the damage begins to take its toll. The body and mind don't snap back like they used to. Each subsequent bender seems to pick up where the last one left off regardless of the amount of time that has passed.
Brain chemistry operates within a very delicate balance and each ethanol bath that you subject it to screws that up more and more. The number of drunk/sober cycles it can handle varies from person to person but it's not unlimited in anyone.
Welcome back Bluesman1952, keep on makin the music but forget about drinkin the wine.
As time marches on and the decades roll by the damage begins to take its toll. The body and mind don't snap back like they used to. Each subsequent bender seems to pick up where the last one left off regardless of the amount of time that has passed.
Brain chemistry operates within a very delicate balance and each ethanol bath that you subject it to screws that up more and more. The number of drunk/sober cycles it can handle varies from person to person but it's not unlimited in anyone.
Welcome back Bluesman1952, keep on makin the music but forget about drinkin the wine.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
To Spinach and Back to square one
Spinach - Thanks for the posts. I already have somethings in mind about alcohol replacement - I love flavored coffees. Hazelnut, French Vanilla, etc. Although caffeine isn't the very best thing for the nerves, they do come de-caf too :-)
Thanks for the suggestions John.
"Back to square one": What you say is exactly what my doc says. As time Marches on, even if it isn't alcohol related, our brains can't tell sometimes what the body can and cannot do. The other day I took the bike out for the first time in years and decided to ride to the river, about 1/4 mile. Well, needless to say, I walked the bike back. Not a kid anymore but try and tell my brain that! I had a sponsor once who had a nice way of putting things. he said, our brains have these little "built-in forgetters". Like, I know how hard it has been this week on me getting through this detox, but the funny thing is, I know if I don't stick with this web site, I'll convince myself...Oh well - whats another week of detox. We forget that WE CAN DIE. Peace to all. I don't think there is ONE death certificate in the world that reads" cause of death, alcoholism. It'll say, congestive heart failure like my Mom's said. What led to the heart failure??? SCOTCH and soda!
Thanks for the suggestions John.
"Back to square one": What you say is exactly what my doc says. As time Marches on, even if it isn't alcohol related, our brains can't tell sometimes what the body can and cannot do. The other day I took the bike out for the first time in years and decided to ride to the river, about 1/4 mile. Well, needless to say, I walked the bike back. Not a kid anymore but try and tell my brain that! I had a sponsor once who had a nice way of putting things. he said, our brains have these little "built-in forgetters". Like, I know how hard it has been this week on me getting through this detox, but the funny thing is, I know if I don't stick with this web site, I'll convince myself...Oh well - whats another week of detox. We forget that WE CAN DIE. Peace to all. I don't think there is ONE death certificate in the world that reads" cause of death, alcoholism. It'll say, congestive heart failure like my Mom's said. What led to the heart failure??? SCOTCH and soda!
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by Praise7
I stopped going to meetings, took my eyes off God. When the nuclear bomb hit, I had no tools. I went back to what I knew for pain and took up where I would have been if I had been drinking that whole 24 years. I lost everything, my career, almost my family and we are losing our house. It isn't worth it. But you know, I still want to drink. That pull was completely gone before but since I relapsed it is so strong.
Hang in there.
Hang in there.
Welcome back.... To all of you who are back to AA.
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Please remember our SR Rule 10 when shareing...thanks!
10. Medical Advice: No Posts giving medical advice, medication advice, or psychiatric advice. Do not use the forum to give or ask for professional medical or psychiatric advice. If you are a medical professional, please remember the forums and chat are for peer support only and not to be used for distributing professional medical advice and/or using the forum to represent your professional services. Medical and Psychiatric advice includes giving a diagnosis, treatment plan, medication advice and dosage suggestions, over the counter and natural home remedies that should be approved by medical professionals. Detox can be dangerous and life threatening at times. Please consult with your physician.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by CarolD
Please remember our SR Rule 10 when shareing...thanks!
Anybody reading this thread PLEASE seek medical attention if your body is giving you signs of something being wrong...Thank you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by Zebra1275
I am 59 years old, and I guess detox is tougher as we get older
So true. How many more detox's do you have in you?
So true. How many more detox's do you have in you?
59 years old is what I am - turning 60 next week. Wish me luck, because 1 60th birthday is a big step in life and I do NOT want to slip....
once in a . . .
Join Date: May 2004
Location: looking in / looking out
Posts: 1,214
Welcome Joe!
The wine was delivered to your house on a daily basis then?
I was always told to expend as much energy in getting/maintaining sobriety as I did in getting drunk/wasted.
Sobriety is well worth the gas $$ - and is much cheaper than medical or funeral expenses.
Is there another meeting somewhat nearby that you could check out? Even if there’s not, what matters is that YOU are there – not who else is there. Really, you DID get something from those meetings – you saw what you DID NOT want to be! Sooner or later like-minded people WILL show up. Meetings can be hard to get used to . . . but man oh man they have saved my life + my sanity. Keep trying – it’s so worth it!
Hmmm . . . nobody ‘cept your wife and son . . . AND G-DAUGHTER?? Way kewl! (I've got FIVE!)
But I hear ya . . . I’m 54, on disability for 12 yrs now and yep, feels like I can’t DO anything and not WORTH anything. That’s called stinkin’ thinkin’ and it’ll get me drunk FAST if I let myself listen to it! I’ve GOT to find something for me to DO . . .
GREAT! Something to DO!!
I hear a song in our (SR’s) future: “The 60 + Sober Blues”! “blues” being somewhat facetious of course
Pop it on YouTube and who knows?!?!
Yep. That’s why THIS alcoholic needs as much support as she can get! Meetings, the Forum here, the Chat Room, talking with like-minded peeps – reading helps me a lot too . . .
Glad You’re Here! Keep Coming Back!
Blue
i talk too much!
Originally Posted by Bluesman1952
I live in a very small back woods town here. I have to travel miles for a meeting.
I was always told to expend as much energy in getting/maintaining sobriety as I did in getting drunk/wasted.
Sobriety is well worth the gas $$ - and is much cheaper than medical or funeral expenses.
Originally Posted by Bluesman1952
I will try it again, but the last time I went I found most of the guys and gals were only there because there job
Originally Posted by Bluesman1952
I am on disability, 60 years old this month, and nobody wants me...
(I've got FIVE!)But I hear ya . . . I’m 54, on disability for 12 yrs now and yep, feels like I can’t DO anything and not WORTH anything. That’s called stinkin’ thinkin’ and it’ll get me drunk FAST if I let myself listen to it! I’ve GOT to find something for me to DO . . .
Originally Posted by Bluesman1952
I have a recording studio in my home - time to get back writing some blues - What I really wish I had was a job.
I hear a song in our (SR’s) future: “The 60 + Sober Blues”! “blues” being somewhat facetious of course
Pop it on YouTube and who knows?!?!
Originally Posted by Bluesman1952
We always look for an excuse, don't we?
Glad You’re Here! Keep Coming Back!
Blue
i talk too much!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Scottsville, Virginia
Posts: 168
Originally Posted by BlueMoon
Welcome Joe!
The wine was delivered to your house on a daily basis then?
I was always told to expend as much energy in getting/maintaining sobriety as I did in getting drunk/wasted.
Sobriety is well worth the gas $$ - and is much cheaper than medical or funeral expenses.
Is there another meeting somewhat nearby that you could check out? Even if there’s not, what matters is that YOU are there – not who else is there. Really, you DID get something from those meetings – you saw what you DID NOT want to be! Sooner or later like-minded people WILL show up. Meetings can be hard to get used to . . . but man oh man they have saved my life + my sanity. Keep trying – it’s so worth it!
Hmmm . . . nobody ‘cept your wife and son . . . AND G-DAUGHTER?? Way kewl! (I've got FIVE!)
But I hear ya . . . I’m 54, on disability for 12 yrs now and yep, feels like I can’t DO anything and not WORTH anything. That’s called stinkin’ thinkin’ and it’ll get me drunk FAST if I let myself listen to it! I’ve GOT to find something for me to DO . . .
GREAT! Something to DO!!
I hear a song in our (SR’s) future: “The 60 + Sober Blues”! “blues” being somewhat facetious of course
Pop it on YouTube and who knows?!?!
Yep. That’s why THIS alcoholic needs as much support as she can get! Meetings, the Forum here, the Chat Room, talking with like-minded peeps – reading helps me a lot too . . .
Glad You’re Here! Keep Coming Back!
Blue
i talk too much!
The wine was delivered to your house on a daily basis then?
I was always told to expend as much energy in getting/maintaining sobriety as I did in getting drunk/wasted.
Sobriety is well worth the gas $$ - and is much cheaper than medical or funeral expenses.
Is there another meeting somewhat nearby that you could check out? Even if there’s not, what matters is that YOU are there – not who else is there. Really, you DID get something from those meetings – you saw what you DID NOT want to be! Sooner or later like-minded people WILL show up. Meetings can be hard to get used to . . . but man oh man they have saved my life + my sanity. Keep trying – it’s so worth it!
Hmmm . . . nobody ‘cept your wife and son . . . AND G-DAUGHTER?? Way kewl!
(I've got FIVE!)But I hear ya . . . I’m 54, on disability for 12 yrs now and yep, feels like I can’t DO anything and not WORTH anything. That’s called stinkin’ thinkin’ and it’ll get me drunk FAST if I let myself listen to it! I’ve GOT to find something for me to DO . . .
GREAT! Something to DO!!
I hear a song in our (SR’s) future: “The 60 + Sober Blues”! “blues” being somewhat facetious of course
Pop it on YouTube and who knows?!?!
Yep. That’s why THIS alcoholic needs as much support as she can get! Meetings, the Forum here, the Chat Room, talking with like-minded peeps – reading helps me a lot too . . .
Glad You’re Here! Keep Coming Back!
Blue
i talk too much!
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