getting bored of being sober
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: New England
Posts: 5,285
Originally Posted by DayTrader 
agreed!!
I read a lot of posts with ppl "looking" for it in their recovery. Some of the stuff I see here is, to me, borderline medical advice but that's another subject...lol. My experience is that I can think myself into something like PAWS if I concentrate on looking for it hard enough. I'm a big believer in the influence the brain has over our physical well-being. I believe we can think ourselves into getting colds and fevers and I think we can think ourselves into withdrawal symptoms.
I read a lot of posts with ppl "looking" for it in their recovery. Some of the stuff I see here is, to me, borderline medical advice but that's another subject...lol. My experience is that I can think myself into something like PAWS if I concentrate on looking for it hard enough. I'm a big believer in the influence the brain has over our physical well-being. I believe we can think ourselves into getting colds and fevers and I think we can think ourselves into withdrawal symptoms.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by LaFemme
Conversely this means we can think ourselves well and whole:-)
Believe me, I tried and tried.... in my case, it was a God-job - I wasn't able to think myself into staying sober - same deal with a lot of the "ism" parts of the disease too. I'll usually try my way but I've also got to be open minded enough to know that some things are outside my abilities.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 45
I encourage everyone interested in PAWs to read the links Carol and I posted cos I'm not sure everyones talking about the same thing.
I've read all the PAWS links listed by Dee and Carol. I'm still trying to find a medical site proving its existence or an article written by an MD rather than someone with a Master's degree to satisfy my own questioning process. At any rate, I personally don't think talking about PAWS is helpful for someone who is new in abstinence because it DOES feel like a dark cloud hanging over one's head, and the thought of feeling that way for 2 years is overwhelming and could cause someone to think that sobriety is something they can't handle and cause them to throw in the towel. Also, the feelings of moodiness and irritability one feels when learning to deal with life without alcohol may just as likely be the result of learning new coping skills and re-formatting new patterns of behavior--not a prolonged alcohol withdrawal process that keeps cropping up for years. This is just my opinion, though, and I'm open to any medical sites people could provide that may cause me to think differently. Also, I don't want to antagonize the site moderators since PAWS is something they both talk about quite often. Really, I think it's more helpful for people to focus on all the positive changes they experience when becoming abstinent, realizing that there will be some challenging days, rather than worrying about getting PAWS.
I've read all the PAWS links listed by Dee and Carol. I'm still trying to find a medical site proving its existence or an article written by an MD rather than someone with a Master's degree to satisfy my own questioning process. At any rate, I personally don't think talking about PAWS is helpful for someone who is new in abstinence because it DOES feel like a dark cloud hanging over one's head, and the thought of feeling that way for 2 years is overwhelming and could cause someone to think that sobriety is something they can't handle and cause them to throw in the towel. Also, the feelings of moodiness and irritability one feels when learning to deal with life without alcohol may just as likely be the result of learning new coping skills and re-formatting new patterns of behavior--not a prolonged alcohol withdrawal process that keeps cropping up for years. This is just my opinion, though, and I'm open to any medical sites people could provide that may cause me to think differently. Also, I don't want to antagonize the site moderators since PAWS is something they both talk about quite often. Really, I think it's more helpful for people to focus on all the positive changes they experience when becoming abstinent, realizing that there will be some challenging days, rather than worrying about getting PAWS.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
Just sharing my experience, Josette.
It makes sense to me and, whatever you may think, knowing of the existence of PAWs has helped me, and others, get through some tough periods when I knew I was otherwise doing all the right things.
That's not the picture I get from the links, nor is it the picture I've ever presented, nor have I seen it presented by any other mod, or the great majority of posters....
in fact the only one here who seems to presenting this picture is you Josette?
I suggest you start a new thread on this because this is a side argument and hasn't got as lot to do with fogheads original post.
D
It makes sense to me and, whatever you may think, knowing of the existence of PAWs has helped me, and others, get through some tough periods when I knew I was otherwise doing all the right things.
At any rate, I personally don't think talking about PAWS is helpful for someone who is new in abstinence because it DOES feel like a dark cloud hanging over one's head, and the thought of feeling that way for 2 years is overwhelming and could cause someone to think that sobriety is something they can't handle and cause them to throw in the towel.
in fact the only one here who seems to presenting this picture is you Josette?
I suggest you start a new thread on this because this is a side argument and hasn't got as lot to do with fogheads original post.
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 197
I am 2 weeks sober. I did do 90 days before and relapsed.
Fist thing i want to say it it can be amazing how at one point during the day you feel totally in control and then a few hours later you can feel weak and vulnerable to drinking again. That's how I felt tonight ~ weak.
I went 90 days at the start of this year and thought i could drink just one time. That led to 4 months of drinking.
Not drinking alcohol is boring. When you drink you know, we're crazy and scream and let it all out. All kinds of weird stuff happens and a lot of it is fun. That is until you start getting in trouble with dui but thats another story.
My point is what's our reward for having a great time and getting drunk on the weekends? Nothing. It's a lie. You're really not having a good time because you need it over and over and over again. It never gets you where you think you are going. And when you look at how far you went, you went nowhere.In fact, you are going backwards because your health is taking a killing and your wallet. You're putting aside your whole life to go nowhere.
Your friends are at the same bar and went nowhere. And when they do go somewhere where did they go? They went to another bar to go nowhere or to a friends house to go nowhere.
I dropped my drinking buddy like a bad habit. I don't think you can have the same friends. It's really not possible. We need to make sober friends. And then when you have fun it's real.
This is what I tell myself.
Fist thing i want to say it it can be amazing how at one point during the day you feel totally in control and then a few hours later you can feel weak and vulnerable to drinking again. That's how I felt tonight ~ weak.
I went 90 days at the start of this year and thought i could drink just one time. That led to 4 months of drinking.
Not drinking alcohol is boring. When you drink you know, we're crazy and scream and let it all out. All kinds of weird stuff happens and a lot of it is fun. That is until you start getting in trouble with dui but thats another story.
My point is what's our reward for having a great time and getting drunk on the weekends? Nothing. It's a lie. You're really not having a good time because you need it over and over and over again. It never gets you where you think you are going. And when you look at how far you went, you went nowhere.In fact, you are going backwards because your health is taking a killing and your wallet. You're putting aside your whole life to go nowhere.
Your friends are at the same bar and went nowhere. And when they do go somewhere where did they go? They went to another bar to go nowhere or to a friends house to go nowhere.
I dropped my drinking buddy like a bad habit. I don't think you can have the same friends. It's really not possible. We need to make sober friends. And then when you have fun it's real.
This is what I tell myself.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Rural OK
Posts: 329
Only my opinion; I think learning about PAWS early this year was one of the things that have helped me maintain my sobriety (sober since Jan.15th). I didn’t blame PAWS or use it as an excuse. I just noticed early on that some of the things that were happening in my brain were similar to what was listed as the symptoms of post acute withdrawal syndrome. Being aware that those symptoms were common in recovering alcoholics, I became better able to cope with the changes both mental and physical.
I always feel more capable in dealing with situations, armed with all the information possible. I am currently reading the book “Staying Sober” – “A Guide For Relapse Prevention” by Terrence Gorski . He seems to be the author of the concept behind PAWS. It is helping me a great deal; I would recommend it to anyone interested in lasting recovery. I can only speak for myself but it has been a plus for me
I always feel more capable in dealing with situations, armed with all the information possible. I am currently reading the book “Staying Sober” – “A Guide For Relapse Prevention” by Terrence Gorski . He seems to be the author of the concept behind PAWS. It is helping me a great deal; I would recommend it to anyone interested in lasting recovery. I can only speak for myself but it has been a plus for me
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Here is my personal experience with PAWS
I shared this as part of another thread.
Personally ...that was not a big deal for me at all...
And I had been an untreated alcoholic for 5years.
I also had horrific de tox symptoms.
Sooo.....why did I miss the PAWS?
I'm not certain but this is my experience.
After checking with my doctor....and a blood test
for the first 6 months I was following an eating plan
+ supplements I found in my favorite book on Alcoholism
"Under The Influence" by Milam & Ketcham
That alone is worth the small cost of the book...IMO
To find similar eating plans Google for hypoglycemia
but always check with your doctor please
And I had been an untreated alcoholic for 5years.
I also had horrific de tox symptoms.
Sooo.....why did I miss the PAWS?
I'm not certain but this is my experience.
After checking with my doctor....and a blood test
for the first 6 months I was following an eating plan
+ supplements I found in my favorite book on Alcoholism
"Under The Influence" by Milam & Ketcham
That alone is worth the small cost of the book...IMO
To find similar eating plans Google for hypoglycemia
but always check with your doctor please
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
Bored?
Compiled by our members...
151 things to do instead of drinking
1. Read a book
2. Take a walk
3. Play a musical instrument
4. Knit
5. Clean your closets
6. Research your genealogy
7. Cook a gourmet dinner
8. Write an article for your local newspaper
9. Go take some pictures
10. Clean the mildew in your bathroom
11. Start writing that book you've been planning
12. Plan a flower garden
13. Plant a veggie garden
14. Play with a pet
15. Read to a child
16. Visit someone in an old folks' home
17. Watch a news special on TV
18. Set up a family budget
19. Make a web site
20. Take up archery
21. Exercise
22. Go to an online recovery meeting
23. Surf the internet
24. Call your mom
25. Learn a foreign language
26. Write a poem
27. Play golf
28. Take a bubble bath
29. Draw
30. Teach a parakeet to whistle
31. Take a nap
32. Listen to music
33. Paint
34. Clean your desk
35. Start a stamp collection
36. Go window shopping
37. Browse in a book store
38. Go to an art gallery
39. Go for a drive
40. Paint a room
41. Watch the clouds go by
42. Play darts
43. Do target shooting
44. Do home repairs
45. Clean your garage
46. Sort your photographs
47. Make a scrapbook
48. Climb a tree
49. Plant a tree
50. Make marmalade
51. Make a list of things to do
52. Write a letter to the editor
53. Volunteer somewhere
54. Take a hike
55. Take a college class
56. Try yoga
57. Meditate
58. Get a massage
59. Make fruit smoothies
60. Bake cookies
61. Do a crossword puzzle
62. Go to the gym
63. Plant a color bowl
64. Sharpen your pruning tools
65. Change your engine oil
66. Sew
67. Groom your dog
68. Go see a play
69. Write a sonnet
70. Sort your recipes
71. Play solitaire
72. Go bird watching
73. Write a letter to a friend
74. Read a poetry book
75. Repot your houseplants
76. Go to a movie
77. Mow your lawn
78. Put up (or take down) your Christmas lights
79. Make pickles
80. Go jogging
81. Watch sitcoms
82. Plan menus for a diet
83. Do a jigsaw puzzle
84. Play chess
85. Write a country-western song
86. Watch a video
87. Go for a bike ride
88. Plant an herb garden
89. Start an online journal
90. Dye your hair
91. Go to a restaurant
92. Lift weights
93. Bake some bread
94. Learn a martial art
95. Polish the furniture
96. Make a flower arrangement
97. Read the newspaper
98. Start some seeds
99. Sort your magazines
100. Do some laundry.
111. Take a nature walk
112. Play with your kids
113. Volunteer at a homeless shelter
114. Volunteer at a school
115. Pick up garbage in a park
116. Tickle your kids
117. Play basketball
118. Volunteer at an animal shelter
119. Read to a child or pet
120. Sign up for obedience training with your dog
121. Take a walk and pick up litter you see on the way
122. Spend time at the library
123. Sort all your digital photos and make an album to print for holiday gifts to family.
124. Help your kid organize his closet.
125. Figure out the melody and chords to your current favorite tune on the piano.
126. Practice your holiday cookie recipes
127. Make crackers from scratch (that one didn't go so well).
128. Make tortillas from scratch (better).
129. Reread a book you haven't read for years.
130. Tango
131. Learn about someone else’s religion.
132. Reread one of your college textbooks.
133. Key out a wildflower.
134. Do your nails.
135. Do word puzzles.
136. Play a board game.
137. Burn CD’s of some of your favorite music for a friend.
138. Plant a bonsai.
139. Play Mad Libs.
140. Speak only in heroic couplets for an hour.
141. Read poetry online.
142. Ride a stationary bicycle.
143. Set up a domino topple.
144. Play backgammon.
145. Build a house of cards
146. Make an entry in Wikipedia.
147. Read a world almanac.
148. Publish a family newsletter.
149. Throw cards at a hat.
150 Go to bed
Update...July 1010
151 Start a Blog
151 things to do instead of drinking
1. Read a book
2. Take a walk
3. Play a musical instrument
4. Knit
5. Clean your closets
6. Research your genealogy
7. Cook a gourmet dinner
8. Write an article for your local newspaper
9. Go take some pictures
10. Clean the mildew in your bathroom
11. Start writing that book you've been planning
12. Plan a flower garden
13. Plant a veggie garden
14. Play with a pet
15. Read to a child
16. Visit someone in an old folks' home
17. Watch a news special on TV
18. Set up a family budget
19. Make a web site
20. Take up archery
21. Exercise
22. Go to an online recovery meeting
23. Surf the internet
24. Call your mom
25. Learn a foreign language
26. Write a poem
27. Play golf
28. Take a bubble bath
29. Draw
30. Teach a parakeet to whistle
31. Take a nap
32. Listen to music
33. Paint
34. Clean your desk
35. Start a stamp collection
36. Go window shopping
37. Browse in a book store
38. Go to an art gallery
39. Go for a drive
40. Paint a room
41. Watch the clouds go by
42. Play darts
43. Do target shooting
44. Do home repairs
45. Clean your garage
46. Sort your photographs
47. Make a scrapbook
48. Climb a tree
49. Plant a tree
50. Make marmalade
51. Make a list of things to do
52. Write a letter to the editor
53. Volunteer somewhere
54. Take a hike
55. Take a college class
56. Try yoga
57. Meditate
58. Get a massage
59. Make fruit smoothies
60. Bake cookies
61. Do a crossword puzzle
62. Go to the gym
63. Plant a color bowl
64. Sharpen your pruning tools
65. Change your engine oil
66. Sew
67. Groom your dog
68. Go see a play
69. Write a sonnet
70. Sort your recipes
71. Play solitaire
72. Go bird watching
73. Write a letter to a friend
74. Read a poetry book
75. Repot your houseplants
76. Go to a movie
77. Mow your lawn
78. Put up (or take down) your Christmas lights
79. Make pickles
80. Go jogging
81. Watch sitcoms
82. Plan menus for a diet
83. Do a jigsaw puzzle
84. Play chess
85. Write a country-western song
86. Watch a video
87. Go for a bike ride
88. Plant an herb garden
89. Start an online journal
90. Dye your hair
91. Go to a restaurant
92. Lift weights
93. Bake some bread
94. Learn a martial art
95. Polish the furniture
96. Make a flower arrangement
97. Read the newspaper
98. Start some seeds
99. Sort your magazines
100. Do some laundry.
111. Take a nature walk
112. Play with your kids
113. Volunteer at a homeless shelter
114. Volunteer at a school
115. Pick up garbage in a park
116. Tickle your kids
117. Play basketball
118. Volunteer at an animal shelter
119. Read to a child or pet
120. Sign up for obedience training with your dog
121. Take a walk and pick up litter you see on the way
122. Spend time at the library
123. Sort all your digital photos and make an album to print for holiday gifts to family.
124. Help your kid organize his closet.
125. Figure out the melody and chords to your current favorite tune on the piano.
126. Practice your holiday cookie recipes
127. Make crackers from scratch (that one didn't go so well).
128. Make tortillas from scratch (better).
129. Reread a book you haven't read for years.
130. Tango
131. Learn about someone else’s religion.
132. Reread one of your college textbooks.
133. Key out a wildflower.
134. Do your nails.
135. Do word puzzles.
136. Play a board game.
137. Burn CD’s of some of your favorite music for a friend.
138. Plant a bonsai.
139. Play Mad Libs.
140. Speak only in heroic couplets for an hour.
141. Read poetry online.
142. Ride a stationary bicycle.
143. Set up a domino topple.
144. Play backgammon.
145. Build a house of cards
146. Make an entry in Wikipedia.
147. Read a world almanac.
148. Publish a family newsletter.
149. Throw cards at a hat.
150 Go to bed
Update...July 1010
151 Start a Blog
Ethanol Intolerant
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Cascadia
Posts: 665
This has bee a really helpful thread for me. I was aware of PAWS before this, but now it seems obvious that is at least part of what has been going on in my noodle - duh. It kinda makes it easier to be patient with myself. Thank you...
SR Fan
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 7,910
hey foghead (love that name, by the way!) I was pretty worried at about a month, too, not knowing if my life would ever be interesting again after getting sober. A lot of things I used to do while drinking (playing video games and even while working) seemed harder and just weren't fun. Then there was my imagination telling me the whole world was at a party and I wasn't......
Or so it seemed.
Just when I thought it would never get better, it did. I don't know if it had to do with my mood getting stabilized, or PAWS, but after about a month and a half (maybe close to 2) things started to interest me again and new things came into my life too. My energy came back, both physical and mental. It occurred to me that the people who said "it gets better" were telling the truth after all!
Think about finding another way to connect with people, like taking a class or joining a group (AA's a great one for us). I agree with another poster here who said if it doesn't get better after a few months, see a psychologist, addiction specialist, or psychiatrist. The real answers are out there (actually inside of you) and they're bound to be better than drinking, right??
Or so it seemed.Just when I thought it would never get better, it did. I don't know if it had to do with my mood getting stabilized, or PAWS, but after about a month and a half (maybe close to 2) things started to interest me again and new things came into my life too. My energy came back, both physical and mental. It occurred to me that the people who said "it gets better" were telling the truth after all!
Think about finding another way to connect with people, like taking a class or joining a group (AA's a great one for us). I agree with another poster here who said if it doesn't get better after a few months, see a psychologist, addiction specialist, or psychiatrist. The real answers are out there (actually inside of you) and they're bound to be better than drinking, right??
Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Merritt Island, Fl
Posts: 1,164
How bout a DUI and some jail time to spice things up? I was asked early on " what was I willing to give up to stay sober" well turns out it was all the things I used to think were exciting and fun. Give it time, you will realise that sobriety has more to it than you think. Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: CA desert
Posts: 1,599
Hey foghead, great name, btw,
You wrote my story, didn't you, lol.
You may be suffering from the same affliction I have, which is gaining more recognition in the medical community, and it's called the BB syndrome (bent brain syndrome, lol). ( just kidding about the medical community part, lol) If you're like me, I drank for so many years that my brain must be bent, cause after all the damage I've done due to boozing it up, my brain still tries to get me drunk, especially on Friday or Saturday night, when the bars are full.
It's not easy being where you are right now, in fact it drives us bananas at times, but you already know that having a drink will lead to another, then another, then a hangover and God knows what. It's tough to stay away from the booze, but it's tougher dealing with the consequences of out-of-control drinking, and that's what we do, we drink till we're out-of-control, if we ever were in-control.
We've just got to go through this uncomfortable phase till we can adjust to life without the booze, which takes time, so hang in there and keep holding on. 35 days is great stuff, and all the other stuff you're into now will pay off too.
You wrote my story, didn't you, lol.
You may be suffering from the same affliction I have, which is gaining more recognition in the medical community, and it's called the BB syndrome (bent brain syndrome, lol). ( just kidding about the medical community part, lol) If you're like me, I drank for so many years that my brain must be bent, cause after all the damage I've done due to boozing it up, my brain still tries to get me drunk, especially on Friday or Saturday night, when the bars are full.
It's not easy being where you are right now, in fact it drives us bananas at times, but you already know that having a drink will lead to another, then another, then a hangover and God knows what. It's tough to stay away from the booze, but it's tougher dealing with the consequences of out-of-control drinking, and that's what we do, we drink till we're out-of-control, if we ever were in-control.
We've just got to go through this uncomfortable phase till we can adjust to life without the booze, which takes time, so hang in there and keep holding on. 35 days is great stuff, and all the other stuff you're into now will pay off too.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by LaFemme
It works for me:-) but I also think you have to believe it is what God wants for you as well.
It sure didn't for me...not for very long anyway. I found my self-will and I, no matter how much I was convinced I was trying to do the "right" thing, were not effective enough when it came to managing my life.
12-Step Recovered Alkie
Join Date: May 2010
Location: West Bloomfield, MI
Posts: 5,797
Originally Posted by stugotz
How bout a DUI and some jail time to spice things up?
you will realise that sobriety has more to it than you think. Good luck.
you will realise that sobriety has more to it than you think. Good luck.
"sobriety has more to it than you think" - man.... that's the understatement of the day
thx
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 185
I think a quote from Frank Sinatra once said "If your sober, you know this is as good as your gonna feel all day". However, on the flip side of that for me, is I know that being sober, I'm not going to sink any lower, and for that I'm truly thankful and I'll stick with the boredom x
Laozi Old Man
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Detroit, MI
Posts: 6,665
Originally Posted by foghead
... sometimes i want to be alone then the next minute im craving attention like a spoilt child.....what the hell is going on with my brain....
Now I meditate to get that mini-vacation and there are no consequences. Without those mini-vacations, I would go nuts within a few weeks and need to drink again just to keep from self-destructing.
I would recommend reading "Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle or
"Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind" by Shunryu Suzuki.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 432
Not sure if I call it PAWS or not, but I know in my outpatient program they told us about "the wall" that went from about 30 days to about 3 months where feelings of depression and irritability can increase because your brain chemicals are trying to even out.. It certainly did with me. I even tried antidepressant meds briefly but they didn't really help.
But it DID get much better (I'm at 14 months now). Right around month 3 I just woke up one morning and realized I hadn't felt like crap for several days. Just keep plugging away one day at a time and you'll feel better, I'm almost sure of it.
Good luck brother!
But it DID get much better (I'm at 14 months now). Right around month 3 I just woke up one morning and realized I hadn't felt like crap for several days. Just keep plugging away one day at a time and you'll feel better, I'm almost sure of it.
Good luck brother!
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