Dumb things you've done while drunk, that you can laugh about now.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
when I was 17,I stole 7 turkeys from a turkey farmer and sold them for 20.00 and got drunk.
next day I got arrested and almost got 6 months on the chain gain.The local farmers didn`t like me too much.
That was 37 years ago and I still haven`t lived it down.
oh yea,I do not eat turkey at any time today!
next day I got arrested and almost got 6 months on the chain gain.The local farmers didn`t like me too much.
That was 37 years ago and I still haven`t lived it down.
oh yea,I do not eat turkey at any time today!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Colorado Prairie
Posts: 1,417
Dumb you ask? Too many to mention but one does stand out. A few years back we were hauling butt through the cemetery on a snowy night. We came sliding around a corner and nailed a headstone. It was a small pillar about 4 feet tall and 12x12 square. It went over the top of the car and caused a little damage to the windshield and roof. Then the thought hit us that we could throw this thing in the trunk and have some weight for traction so we could get up into the mountains and poach us a deer.
So we go get a deer and it wouldn't fit in the trunk because of the headstone. We field dress it that night and make plans to go get it in the morning.
I guarantee that nobody could come up with a story that could explain to the Troopers satisfaction as to why we had guns, were covered with blood and had a headstone in the trunk.
Sometimes when you have no choice but to tell the truth, they still won't believe you.
So we go get a deer and it wouldn't fit in the trunk because of the headstone. We field dress it that night and make plans to go get it in the morning.
I guarantee that nobody could come up with a story that could explain to the Troopers satisfaction as to why we had guns, were covered with blood and had a headstone in the trunk.
Sometimes when you have no choice but to tell the truth, they still won't believe you.
No Codie No More.
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: New York
Posts: 155
this post should be locked, most of us are here because we can't laugh about what has been done to us or did to people.
The dumb thing that some individuals have done is get drunk in the first place.
The dumb thing that some individuals have done is get drunk in the first place.
Follow Directions!
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Fredericksburg, Va.
Posts: 9,730
Hmmmm well many of my funniest are R to X rated, I do recall coming to looking at the sun through the branches of a bush????? It took me a while but I finally realized that I must have passed out while preseason scouting for deer. I was plowed beyond belief, I spent 10-15 minutes trying to stand up..... once I was up I got my bearings and headed off in the direction of my truck.
Eventually I got back to my truck and it took me a good 5 minutes just to get in it! Well I sat in the seat and thought "Man I am WAY to drunk to drive home." I sat there for another 10-15 minutes and some how convinced myself that I could drive home! Some how I made it without killing myself or some one else.
What do I find amusing about the whole deal is just how darn insane I was to even imagine I was sober enough to drive as plowed as I was. God saved me and a lot of other folks over the years of my drunk driving.
Then there was the time I was in a bar in DC, I was plowed again and I stumbled going out the bar door and was headed straight for the street, I managed to hook a light pole on my way towards the street and corkscrewed myself around it all the way to the ground....... I look up and these folks are looking at me shaking thier heads.... I said "Man I almost fell into the street!".
Are these things really funny? No not really, but I laugh at the insanity of them and myself when I was drinking.
Did I do anything funny while drunk that a nonalcoholic would think was funny? Probably not....... but they sure seemed funny at the time usually.
Eventually I got back to my truck and it took me a good 5 minutes just to get in it! Well I sat in the seat and thought "Man I am WAY to drunk to drive home." I sat there for another 10-15 minutes and some how convinced myself that I could drive home! Some how I made it without killing myself or some one else.
What do I find amusing about the whole deal is just how darn insane I was to even imagine I was sober enough to drive as plowed as I was. God saved me and a lot of other folks over the years of my drunk driving.
Then there was the time I was in a bar in DC, I was plowed again and I stumbled going out the bar door and was headed straight for the street, I managed to hook a light pole on my way towards the street and corkscrewed myself around it all the way to the ground....... I look up and these folks are looking at me shaking thier heads.... I said "Man I almost fell into the street!".
Are these things really funny? No not really, but I laugh at the insanity of them and myself when I was drinking.
Did I do anything funny while drunk that a nonalcoholic would think was funny? Probably not....... but they sure seemed funny at the time usually.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Born in Long Island NY/Mtns of N.C Is my home now
Posts: 405
Wow, i could crash this site with the stuff I and some here would think was funny, being its almost christmas i will share one relating to the season, it was a big party at my home with family friends etc. i had been drinking all day i mean All day, well i was told this was around 7 that night i proceeded to p on the christmas tree then stripped down to my birthday suit announced to everyone i was going to bed, then turned back toward the tree and passed out into the middle of it, where i woke up the next day.
Sad? yes Funny now? yes INSANITY...
Only by the grace of God go I.......
John
Sad? yes Funny now? yes INSANITY...
Only by the grace of God go I.......
John
Ending the Old Me.
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Under a Rock
Posts: 377
Most of could fill a book with this stuff and 90% of it only another alcoholic would see the humor. But if I couldn't laugh about some of this I would spend the rest of life crying and in regret.
Sadly and quite funny to me are the, "drunken dares and "mythbuster" stunts with my drinking buddies from college.
"Bet you can't jump over that fence!" Result - 11 stiches in the a$$.
If it's cold enough outside - your tounge really will freeze to cold steel.
Cows really do sleep or least pretend to standing up.
Holding hands, standing in mud and getting the person in front to grab the electric fence is not a good idea.
Even worse is peeing on the electric fence.
Filling ballons with welding gas and setting them off with a firecracker is just plain fun, even if your not drinking.
Convincing your drunk and nieve buddy to run through the woods on a snipe hunt is all fun and games until someone breaks an ankle.
Dueling with bottle rockets in a dry field at 2 AM seemed like a really good idea at the time. It's not my fault the owner of said field, town sheriff and fire department have no sense of humor!
Sadly and quite funny to me are the, "drunken dares and "mythbuster" stunts with my drinking buddies from college.
"Bet you can't jump over that fence!" Result - 11 stiches in the a$$.
If it's cold enough outside - your tounge really will freeze to cold steel.
Cows really do sleep or least pretend to standing up.
Holding hands, standing in mud and getting the person in front to grab the electric fence is not a good idea.
Even worse is peeing on the electric fence.
Filling ballons with welding gas and setting them off with a firecracker is just plain fun, even if your not drinking.
Convincing your drunk and nieve buddy to run through the woods on a snipe hunt is all fun and games until someone breaks an ankle.
Dueling with bottle rockets in a dry field at 2 AM seemed like a really good idea at the time. It's not my fault the owner of said field, town sheriff and fire department have no sense of humor!
Guest
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 157
I can't seem to recall anything at the moment worthy of mentioning, of course that may be because towards the end of my drinking career I had so many blackout. So, if anything funny happened during those, no one has mentioned it to me. And I don't think my SO found it very amusing. So, I have to keep that scary thought alive in order to maintain sobriety. I think remembering anything as funny may tempt me to think that my drinking was fun.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Albuquerque, New Mexico
Posts: 565
That's the thing, we all have done some "amusing" things while drunk, but most of it was hurtful to ourselves or others. Not that I think all my drunk time was bad. I had a blast at the beginning, but it turned into absolute hell at the end. So here's another.
In my dress up tradition: there was another time I dressed up like a ghost and ran around a drive in movie theatre scaring people. Someone finally knocked me out, I don't know who because I had a sheet on.
I seem to put on a lot of costumes when drunk. I have a sheep wool cowboy outfit with one of those big foam hats and I have no idea why. I've also got an Uncle Sam and a great Elvis that I have no idea where they came from. I'm an odd guy....
We have to keep ourselves grounded, while still remaining alive.
In my dress up tradition: there was another time I dressed up like a ghost and ran around a drive in movie theatre scaring people. Someone finally knocked me out, I don't know who because I had a sheet on.
I seem to put on a lot of costumes when drunk. I have a sheep wool cowboy outfit with one of those big foam hats and I have no idea why. I've also got an Uncle Sam and a great Elvis that I have no idea where they came from. I'm an odd guy....
We have to keep ourselves grounded, while still remaining alive.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
Tex,so that was you?I was wondering who it was...glad you finally put some clothes on man...
yea,we alkies have a knack for getting loaded and taking our clothes off..for some reason....
yea,we alkies have a knack for getting loaded and taking our clothes off..for some reason....
Originally Posted by Texasblind 
Laugh about? Not many, my drunk stories are actually pretty painful....
However there was the time I dressed up like Zorro and streaked around the college. Just the mask, hat and cape and my bare ass.
However there was the time I dressed up like Zorro and streaked around the college. Just the mask, hat and cape and my bare ass.
It`s ok to stay sober
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Central NC
Posts: 20,902
John,I would really hate it when I came too the next morning and realize what I did and then have the family or friends tell me about for the next 5 years.....
Originally Posted by problemchild
Wow, i could crash this site with the stuff I and some here would think was funny, being its almost christmas i will share one relating to the season, it was a big party at my home with family friends etc. i had been drinking all day i mean All day, well i was told this was around 7 that night i proceeded to p on the christmas tree then stripped down to my birthday suit announced to everyone i was going to bed, then turned back toward the tree and passed out into the middle of it, where i woke up the next day.
Sad? yes Funny now? yes INSANITY...
Only by the grace of God go I.......
John
Sad? yes Funny now? yes INSANITY...
Only by the grace of God go I.......
John
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: spokane, WA
Posts: 2
haha just last night actually. i was with my best friend and a couple guy friends. we were smoking and drinking so the effects were even worse. me and my best friend were in the car and we both agreed we wanted a 3-some. we got in the bedroom with our friend abel but he only wanted sex with me. so we had sex with my best friend laying on the bed next to me. then my best friend grabbed my face and started making out with me. i woke up without pants laying on someone elses bed next to my best friend. i was really confused.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: spokane, WA
Posts: 2
another time was labor day. i went to a college party with a few friends and the guy i liked was later invited by me. well i drank WAY too much. i fell in the bathroom and cut my chin on the door knob. then when i ran outside to meet the guy i liked, i fell down a gravel hill and cut my knee all up. there was blood all over my pants but i didn't feel anything till later. over an hour later i randomly screamed and asked what happened to my leg. then i lost my phone about 10 times. told everyone i had to work at 9:30am the next day like 6 times. then i went outside and proceeded to throw up alot. then apparently i stole paper towels with the guy and got in his car. was too drunk to remember where i lived so i had to go crash at the ppl's house that i babysit for.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 21
Originally Posted by Texasblind
That's the thing, we all have done some "amusing" things while drunk, but most of it was hurtful to ourselves or others. Not that I think all my drunk time was bad. I had a blast at the beginning, but it turned into absolute hell at the end. So here's another.
In my dress up tradition: there was another time I dressed up like a ghost and ran around a drive in movie theatre scaring people. Someone finally knocked me out, I don't know who because I had a sheet on.
I seem to put on a lot of costumes when drunk. I have a sheep wool cowboy outfit with one of those big foam hats and I have no idea why. I've also got an Uncle Sam and a great Elvis that I have no idea where they came from. I'm an odd guy....
We have to keep ourselves grounded, while still remaining alive.
In my dress up tradition: there was another time I dressed up like a ghost and ran around a drive in movie theatre scaring people. Someone finally knocked me out, I don't know who because I had a sheet on.
I seem to put on a lot of costumes when drunk. I have a sheep wool cowboy outfit with one of those big foam hats and I have no idea why. I've also got an Uncle Sam and a great Elvis that I have no idea where they came from. I'm an odd guy....
We have to keep ourselves grounded, while still remaining alive.
THanks for the smile!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 49
A lot of crazy stories come to mind. Not sure how appropriate they are for SR, but here we go. This one is probably the funniest and least destructive.
One time after a long night of drinking I was about to pass out and somehow I remembered I should probably go to the bathroom before I went to sleep. I got up and stumbled to what I thought was the bathroom and started to go. I had actually urinated on my best friend's face who was passed out on my floor. He woke up and wasn't too happy. True story. Ive heard of people urinating in the fridge or in a closet, but not on someone's face while intoxicated. To this day I really don't think I did it on purpose.
One time after a long night of drinking I was about to pass out and somehow I remembered I should probably go to the bathroom before I went to sleep. I got up and stumbled to what I thought was the bathroom and started to go. I had actually urinated on my best friend's face who was passed out on my floor. He woke up and wasn't too happy. True story. Ive heard of people urinating in the fridge or in a closet, but not on someone's face while intoxicated. To this day I really don't think I did it on purpose.
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