Awful-i-zation
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Originally Posted by barb dwyer 
"awful-izing" - newest AA catch phrase ... and you saw it happen here !
(I give it a year to see in Grapevine...any takers?)
Love it. Gonna steal that one for sure.
DO it. WEAR it. Can't UNZIP it a lot of the time.
(I give it a year to see in Grapevine...any takers?)
Love it. Gonna steal that one for sure.
DO it. WEAR it. Can't UNZIP it a lot of the time.
I didn't make it up myself. I heard it in AA, and I could instantly relate. It's now my word for my behaviour/thinking.
chip
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Originally Posted by PurpleReign
It's funny you should post this Chip...I went to Tenn. over the holiday weekend to visit my pops and think I caught a bug on the plane there or back because I was unloading from both ends for two days. Unfortunately one of those days I happened to be scheduled to ride with my boss, so I was pretty worried about being put on a plan. Well, today I got put on a plan for work, so my drinking mistakes are still haunting me to this day.
Thanks to God, AA, SR, and a good support network of friends this is my seventh day sober and I don't intend to f-it up by drinking the pain of being on a plan away. Oddly enough I had already made plans to stop drinking while visiting my dad over the weekend who, knowing I needed to stop drinking, didin't have a single beer in sight the entire weekend - it actually brought me to tears every night because my dad is an alcoholic (just got off the phone with him and he was slurring his words already) but told me, when I thanked him for not drinking in front of me, "it's not the only sacrifice I've made for you ya know." I said, "Yeah, I know dad...thanks."
So I'm thankful for seven days sober, a father that put away the sauce for two days, my health - having felt like I was going to die a few short days ago from who-knows-what, and the opportunity to save my job.
Thanks for letting me share - I'm off to watch Glenngary Glen Ross and fell better about my job.
Peace,
PR
Thanks to God, AA, SR, and a good support network of friends this is my seventh day sober and I don't intend to f-it up by drinking the pain of being on a plan away. Oddly enough I had already made plans to stop drinking while visiting my dad over the weekend who, knowing I needed to stop drinking, didin't have a single beer in sight the entire weekend - it actually brought me to tears every night because my dad is an alcoholic (just got off the phone with him and he was slurring his words already) but told me, when I thanked him for not drinking in front of me, "it's not the only sacrifice I've made for you ya know." I said, "Yeah, I know dad...thanks."
So I'm thankful for seven days sober, a father that put away the sauce for two days, my health - having felt like I was going to die a few short days ago from who-knows-what, and the opportunity to save my job.
Thanks for letting me share - I'm off to watch Glenngary Glen Ross and fell better about my job.
Peace,
PR
PR,
Congrats on 7 days!!!!!
You are on the right path. I hope things work out with the job. Keep your chin up. Staying sober is the best decision you can make.
Today, I reminded myself that things could always be worse....especially if I pick up a drink! My worst day sober is better than my best day drinking.
chip
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Awful-i-zation-
Waking up at 4 am, after going to bed at 2, thinking about work. After a difficult week, starting the weekend with a bout of insominia fueled by racing thoughts about how awful the boss is and COULD be next week.... I can't just have a tough week. I have to bring this BS into my personal life and my weekend. This is awful-i-zation. I've gotta change my perspective and try to have a nice day.
At least I'm sober.
If I wasn't sober, I'd be passed out right now, in a dark oblivion. I would be doomed to wake up in a fog, and continue a cycle of self destruction.
For me, awful-i-zation doesn't have as much to do with drinking as it has to do with the guy who did the drinking. The guy who is writing this can be a prisoner to his own thoughts. I'm sure I did this when I drank, but I was able to shut it off and numb it with a steady flow of draft beer.
This morning, I got out of bed after tossing and turning for 3 hours.
I'm going to make the best of this, and enjoy a peaceful quiet morning in my back yard. I'll come back later today.
May God Bless You All,
chip
Waking up at 4 am, after going to bed at 2, thinking about work. After a difficult week, starting the weekend with a bout of insominia fueled by racing thoughts about how awful the boss is and COULD be next week.... I can't just have a tough week. I have to bring this BS into my personal life and my weekend. This is awful-i-zation. I've gotta change my perspective and try to have a nice day.
At least I'm sober.
If I wasn't sober, I'd be passed out right now, in a dark oblivion. I would be doomed to wake up in a fog, and continue a cycle of self destruction.
For me, awful-i-zation doesn't have as much to do with drinking as it has to do with the guy who did the drinking. The guy who is writing this can be a prisoner to his own thoughts. I'm sure I did this when I drank, but I was able to shut it off and numb it with a steady flow of draft beer.
This morning, I got out of bed after tossing and turning for 3 hours.
I'm going to make the best of this, and enjoy a peaceful quiet morning in my back yard. I'll come back later today.
May God Bless You All,
chip
same planet...different world
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once again - Chip says it all ... kicking hiney, bud!
wow!
For me, awful-i-zation doesn't have as much to do with drinking as it has to do with the guy who did the drinking. The guy who is writing this can be a prisoner to his own thoughts.
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Originally Posted by chip
PR,
Congrats on 7 days!!!!!
You are on the right path. I hope things work out with the job. Keep your chin up. Staying sober is the best decision you can make.
Today, I reminded myself that things could always be worse....especially if I pick up a drink! My worst day sober is better than my best day drinking.
chip
Congrats on 7 days!!!!!
You are on the right path. I hope things work out with the job. Keep your chin up. Staying sober is the best decision you can make.
Today, I reminded myself that things could always be worse....especially if I pick up a drink! My worst day sober is better than my best day drinking.
chip
Can't say I didn't deserve what I got, but that doesn't make it any more of a good time. I guess I'm a little disturbed that I'm not disturbed about my job at present - it's in God's hands now, so I'm cool with that...certainly doesn't relieve me of responsibility but it's good to know that if I do my very best (which I haven't been doing), stay sober, and still lose my job - The Man Upstairs had it in the cards all along anyhow. (And He's a pretty cool dude in my book.
)On Monday I told my "best friend" that I needed to have a few months to myself - no more partying, going to clubs, drinking or drugging for me - so he's "laid off" for the next three months while I work things out. He didn't take it well (we've grew up together, hell we were in diapers at the same time) and took some cheap shots on voicemail that initially pissed me off, but the next glorious day sober I thought about it and could actually see his point of view - the bottom line was it hurts both of us not to hang out, drink beer, and chase women...but my life is on the line now (not to be confused with my job.) People, places, things - started changing them the day I got back from Tenn. Before I got sober because of my GF, my job, my parents, my [insert anything external to myself] - but now I'm sick and tired of the intoxicated life and this one's for me.
You're right Chip, things can ALWAYS be worse. So here's to day 8!!!
Peace brotherman,
PR
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Originally Posted by Cynay
Guilty as charged.... still work on that one.
and the funny part is I will have an answer worked out for any possible result before Im sure there is even a problem.
and the funny part is I will have an answer worked out for any possible result before Im sure there is even a problem.
I have to say Ditto on this one Cynay! In fact I think you and I know what I did and I apologize for that last week! BINGO! I "awful-ized" the situation and it was called for the way you did respond but, not the way that I did!
So yup uh huh still working on this one myself! And I'am a "codie"!!! We are probably the most guilty of this don't ya think?!
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Originally Posted by chip
\
When I was drinking, at times, I could really fool myself into forgetting about things like this...at least putting them off. The big challenge for me is to deal with things that upset me, as they come up in my life, without running away.
This sobriety thing means there is no where to hide. I'm stuck with me, and I can choose to be un-happy, or try to keep my serenity.
When I was drinking, at times, I could really fool myself into forgetting about things like this...at least putting them off. The big challenge for me is to deal with things that upset me, as they come up in my life, without running away.
This sobriety thing means there is no where to hide. I'm stuck with me, and I can choose to be un-happy, or try to keep my serenity.
Originally Posted by chip
Pete-
Isn't it weird how it doesn't always turn out as bad as we think? For me, I look back and I think "why did I put myself though this mental torture?"
chip
Isn't it weird how it doesn't always turn out as bad as we think? For me, I look back and I think "why did I put myself though this mental torture?"
chip
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WOW!!!! I can sure relate to awful-i-zation, that seemed to be my whole life for years, when I was drinking some how I would drink this away, towards the end of my drinking there did not seem to be enough booze to take it away, numb it a bit but I still knew it was there.
Man when I first sobered up it was close to being over powering, between my sponsor, AA meetings, the BB, and working the steps not only did I make it through them, but now I find I do not do it nearly as often as I used to.
I have learned that actions on my part over things I do have control over have really made a difference. Like paying bills when they come in, I no longer sit and wonder if I mailed the check in time to keep the (name the utility) from being cut off, I am not worrying about all the food in the freezer and fridge getteing ruined or sleeping in a house with no heat or air, or wondering if I was going to be living in the dark or have my car insurance canceled.
Man when I first sobered up it was close to being over powering, between my sponsor, AA meetings, the BB, and working the steps not only did I make it through them, but now I find I do not do it nearly as often as I used to.
I have learned that actions on my part over things I do have control over have really made a difference. Like paying bills when they come in, I no longer sit and wonder if I mailed the check in time to keep the (name the utility) from being cut off, I am not worrying about all the food in the freezer and fridge getteing ruined or sleeping in a house with no heat or air, or wondering if I was going to be living in the dark or have my car insurance canceled.
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I had an experience today when I really tried not to awful-i-ze.
It was difficult.
I talked about it at a meeting today, and I got through it. When things turned out ok, a large weight was lifted off my shoulders.
I still went through some mental torture, but it was managable.
I've been having alot of work anxiety lately.
chip
It was difficult.
I talked about it at a meeting today, and I got through it. When things turned out ok, a large weight was lifted off my shoulders.
I still went through some mental torture, but it was managable.
I've been having alot of work anxiety lately.
chip
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Awfulizing is the story of my life. It's gotten to the point now that I never let myself experience joy or relaxation because I feel that I must live in fear constantly. I never stop worrying, always asume the worst, and it is to the point now where it is beginning to take it's toll on my physical health.
When I was drinking I was sicker than ever. Even though it felt as though I was dying, at least I had that period where I could numb my mind, relax and forget about things. Now, I get to experience life or as I sometimes like to call it "bottomless anxiety."
The thing is I usually end up being fine, and I do not know why to this day I still have such a lack of faith.
Sobriety is a truly surreal experience.
When I was drinking I was sicker than ever. Even though it felt as though I was dying, at least I had that period where I could numb my mind, relax and forget about things. Now, I get to experience life or as I sometimes like to call it "bottomless anxiety."
The thing is I usually end up being fine, and I do not know why to this day I still have such a lack of faith.
Sobriety is a truly surreal experience.
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The thing is I usually end up being fine, and I do not know why to this day I still have such a lack of faith.
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Thanks CHIP!
Isn't awfulising a phrase used in SMART recovery?
There are definitely lots of people out there who awfulise but who're not alcoholics. My mum was definitely one! But awfulising was one of those things that made me really appreciate how good AA is at helping me to live differently - the antidote to awfulising is "one day at a time" - ing, don't you think? Dealing with what's in front of me keeps me sane, and if I don't stay sane there's every chance I'll drink.
Thanks for the opportunity to meditate on something that is so important for me in minimising the effects of my dis-ease!
Isn't awfulising a phrase used in SMART recovery?
There are definitely lots of people out there who awfulise but who're not alcoholics. My mum was definitely one! But awfulising was one of those things that made me really appreciate how good AA is at helping me to live differently - the antidote to awfulising is "one day at a time" - ing, don't you think? Dealing with what's in front of me keeps me sane, and if I don't stay sane there's every chance I'll drink.
Thanks for the opportunity to meditate on something that is so important for me in minimising the effects of my dis-ease!
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the antidote to awfulising is "one day at a time" - ing, don't you think?
Hmmm did I just kind of plagerize the Serenity Prayer? LOL
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Taz - pretty much.
I got to thinking about this on my days off, Chip ...
I'm doing 6th step stuff ....
and 'awfulizing' fits that, too...
I notice 'gonna' comes up a lot when I'm doing it ...
'oh wow, he's gonna do this,
and I'm gonna have to figure out what to do when they do it ...'
'I don't wanna go, they're gonna be bla bla ...'
'oh man, here we go ... now it's gonna be all this way ...'
Almost liek taking 'what if' ... and making it thicker or something ...
I got to thinking about this on my days off, Chip ...
I'm doing 6th step stuff ....
and 'awfulizing' fits that, too...
I notice 'gonna' comes up a lot when I'm doing it ...
'oh wow, he's gonna do this,
and I'm gonna have to figure out what to do when they do it ...'
'I don't wanna go, they're gonna be bla bla ...'
'oh man, here we go ... now it's gonna be all this way ...'
Almost liek taking 'what if' ... and making it thicker or something ...
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Thanks Chip and all. Me too. And I sometimes end up awfulizing in both directions at the same time! 1) Have visions of how everything will be a catastrophe in the future...
...and 2) obsess manically about tiny incidents in the past that no one ever noticed or cared about anyway, sort of permanent cringe. It's no way to live.
...and 2) obsess manically about tiny incidents in the past that no one ever noticed or cared about anyway, sort of permanent cringe. It's no way to live.
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