JustAYak

Sorry to hear it ((Bill)).

Willybluedog

Thank you Jason,

Are you doing better today?

dollydo

Bill...I sure do understand, be assured, you are not alone...I have had my hands slapped often on this site, as, I am not a foo foo lets make believe person. Years ago when I joined this site, a mix of responses was acceptable, now all the owners of the site want are cute little hugs...honestly, when I was with exabf if all I got were the little hugs I'd still be hooked up with the dumb azz. I needed truth and guidance not foo, foo.

I don't post much anymore, I got tired of being reported by people who would post a few times, not listen to anything anyone had to offer, then disappear, then reappear 6 months later and start the same old....over again.

You are honest and I always enjoyed reading your responses and learned from them...I agree with your therapist..be true to yourself.

I still feel comfortable posting on this particular forum as I believe we survivors are all rowing in the same direction and truly understand.

Sending support your way...as ever....Dolly

JustAYak

Nah man...I really screwed up the other day. I have a lot to be ashamed of right now and scared of really. So I'm just rolling with the punches for now and trying to make it right... It doesn't have much to do with ACoA stuff though, not directly anyway.

Even if you withdraw from the forum, I'm glad that you were here, I've learned a lot from you.

Willybluedog

Dolly, thank you so much, you all have given me alot of encouragement and I do want to be here, I am going to give it my best shot.

Willybluedog

Jason,

I have made so many mistakes in my life, I have hurt many many people over the years, I raged against everyone, I was as hard or harder on the people I loved than the ones I hated.

Saying "I'm sorry-I screwed up" goes a long way toward making things right.

If you need to talk you can email or call or whatever you need, I can give you the benefit of looking back on 50 years of anger, sadness, juvenille behavior, dangerous and stupid decisons, and yet God has kept me here, he has had many chances to take me over the years and chose not to, I believe that is because he knows I have lessons to share.

I saw a quote the other day that made me smile, it was:

"Of course I am not useless, I can be used as a bad example!"

There are lots of people here that care about you, help is nothing more than a mouse click or phone call away.

You will find a way through this, you have survived so much, don't ever doubt that you can achieve great things, I believe in you!

Big bear hugs,

Bill

dollydo

Jay, I am the poster child for screw ups, don't let one incident set you back, forgive yourself, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and continue to move forward.

dollydo

Today, I am relieved.

My old dog made it through surgery, had 6 bad, bad, teeth removed and is now home. A little woobly, wobbly but able to stand. I was really getting concerned yesterday as it was 5pm and no word from Vet, finally called, seems the Vet brought grads students in to view the surgery, as they had not seen any 18 yo dogs having surgery...plus he is now blind and deaf..hence the delay in performing surgery.

Since they did show n tell with him, they also gave him and chest xray and an MRI...free
and only charged me $230 for the surgery and meds...I know that I was looking at a $700 to $800 bill, plus they found nothing else wrong with him!

Needless to say, I am relieved....all the way around!

JustAYak

Glad to hear your dog is okay ((Dolly)).

dollydo

Good day ahead of me! I feel grand, slept a full 7 hours, can't remember the last time that happened! Helping a friend wallpaper, trying to cover paneling, stuff is real thick,hopefully, it will do the job!

Keep smiling, everyone will wonder what the heck is going on!

Willybluedog

I feel good today, I got to sleep laying down in the bed for the first time since I got the flu over a month ago, my wife was not happy about having to give up the middle of the bed though

Thanks for all the support here and on my blog, I have decided to just post here and stay out of the F&F and other forums where there is more drama and triggers.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Chris1000101

Seeking to be ornery or playfully cantankerous.

DavidG

Madame drove into the garage last night after a night out- all spick and span.
Having a physical clean up is good for my inner me.

EveningRose

Tired, exhausted, frustrated. I had hoped to get major house-cleaning done on my break from work, and feel I've accomplished very little, plus taxes are still hanging over my head.

Kialua

Tiirrreeeeddd.

dollydo

One decent night of sleep and then last night I tossed n turned...tired...yet again.

Mo S

I feel like crap. I'm in a bout of negative self-loathing "my father isnt here to do it so let me beat myself up". Frustrated...I have worked so hard on this issue and one or two TINY little situations bring it all back making me feel hopeless like Ive made no progress. I feel dread. I feel codependent. I feel like an ACOA.

dollydo

Mo...I do the same thing, beat myself up over and over again...don't dispair...it does get better....progress...not perfection.

You are special, you are valued and loved by many...don't ever forget this.

Hey...look we are neighbors...I live in Ellenton!

Willybluedog

I hate to be a broken record, but, (music for effect), duh-duh duh-duh duh-duh DUH! the affirmation exercises will help, I swear they will, sometimes you have to re-read them, you will slip, you will fall, it is not the be-all end-all miracle cure we all seek, but they do help re-frame the negativity that we heap on ourselves.

Please try them, 7 times a day, 21 days, then go tell me to take a flying __________!

Stepping down from my soapbox now,

Big hugs to all of you!

Bill

dollydo

I posted this on the whiners thread last night:

Good Grief..it rained yesterday big time...went out tonight to enjoy my din din on my back deck the mosquitos (is that spelled right?) were wearing saddles, one could ride them, they were bombimg me left and right...grabbed my:uzi2: fired away...those little besterds went nuts so I grabbed my din din and slammed the door in their face! Ha I won...nope..wrong...we are now all inside, watching TV and eating my din din...what is wrong with this picture? Zap, boom, bang..I'll get you...you little besterds.

So, this morning I am doing the skeeter dance i swear there is not a part of my body that has not been bitten multiple times...and they were a buzzin around my head all night...I sprayed and sprayed...my house smells like Raid and so do I!

Needless to say, today, I am pzzd!