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Class of November 2016 Support Thread Part 8

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Old 04-09-2017, 04:56 AM
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Class of November 2016 Support Thread Part 8

last part here

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...rt-7-a-20.html

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Old 04-09-2017, 11:15 AM
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Thanks, Dee.

Almost 23 weeks! I've definitely been turning things around. Lots more exercise, including long walks (8 miles yesterday), and morning runs, and planks (ugh) and pushups (ughhh).

I've also just joined the grocery delivery crazy (Hello Fresh), where they send you a box of food and recipes and all you do is follow along. It's convenient, and I like that I'm learning to do some more "advanced" recipes than my normal stuff.

And as of today, I've lost 45 pounds since Nov. 1. I'm fitting in to clothes that I haven't worn in months or even years (thank god I didn't throw them away). It's like having a new wardrobe for free!

I'm still struggling with boredom, and loneliness at times. However, I'm acknowledging those feelings when they come up, and trying to make a point to do something (anything!), so that I don't get sad or dark.

I thought to myself this morning on my walk "I'm so glad you did this."

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Old 04-09-2017, 01:22 PM
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That is awesome tnek. I have also toned up and lost a lot of puffiness and bloat since I stopped drinking.
Life truly is better without toxic poison
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Old 04-09-2017, 09:50 PM
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Wow tnek that is great. I'm so glad you're feeling so good!

Bf and I celebrated our first anniversary together the other night. Went to a movie, sat by the water and talked, and went to a sushi dinner. Then out for dessert. Then another movie at home. Totally sober. We had great laughs and it was a really wonderful evening. Now back to some much needed alone time here at my home/studio.

I am literally eating cheez-its and licorice ropes for dinner, with soda water. I do not know how I'll lose weight but I suppose that will have to come later. Right now it's just a blessing to have my head clear and be able to have and get laughs stone cold sober.

I did go to my local herbalist and get some things for anxiety, however.
I DO use mouthwash, I DO cook with wine, and I DO take tinctures and tonics. But I DON'T drink to feel the effects of alcohol. The herbs have been helping me a great deal. I am also taking vitamins: magnesium and a B complex. i'm sure I have leeched my body of important minerals and vitamins
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Old 04-10-2017, 12:10 AM
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Hey Plenny, what herbs do you take? How do they help? I'd be keen to try it out
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Old 04-10-2017, 12:50 AM
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Originally Posted by kenton View Post
Can I ask a question about something I'm a bit worried about.... is it normal at this stage of recovery to feel a bit removed from real life? I feel like I'm here, doing everything I have to do but in a constant haze of brain fog. I also often use the wrong word when speaking. I know straightaway that I've used the wrong word and correct myself but it worries me a little. I know no one can give medical advice and if it gets worse I'll see a doctor. I just wonder whether it's because I seem to be thinking about alcohol ALL the time at the moment so there's less room in my brain to concentrate on other stuff. Or whether I've destroyed parts of my brain by drinking far too much for far too many years. Or whether it's my brain trying to acclimatise to sobriety. I just wondered whether anyone else has experienced it and if so, does it get better? Thanks
Sorry I missed this Kenton.

It;'s very very normal to have brain fog - searching for words,
absentmindedness etc... and although I didn't really feel any sense of removal from the world around me, thats pretty common too.

Around the three month mark things got a lot better for me, but my journey was complicated by a series of mini strokes in my last detox...so your time to full healing may even quicker than mine.

Don't despair tho - there will be improvement, guaranteed

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Old 04-10-2017, 01:57 AM
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Thanks Dee, good to know that these feelings are a normal part of recovery.

I wish everyone happy and sober futures. I'm going to try so hard never to drink again and I wish the same for each of you. Good luck everyone.
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Old 04-10-2017, 10:51 AM
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Morning all
Sorry as well Kenton, I too missed your last post. I can completely relate to using wrong words, forgetting how simple words are spelt, brain fog, lost in space at times.
I noticed that I was thinking a lot about certain situations I was in so I figured I was trying to 'think' about too much and my brain just went on overload. It has passed for the time being but it has happened a few times.
I also noticed about 3 months in that my memory was much better. I remembered stuff that I had forgotten for years and years. Like a persons last name.
But I do still have times where I zone out a wee bit. Could be that your tired, stressed, hungry, all of the above.
I think if it is a constant for you that you should check it out with your doc.
If it isn't, I would expect that it will pass with more sober time
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Old 04-11-2017, 12:12 AM
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Very quiet nobenders recently. I hope all are doing super awesome
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Old 04-11-2017, 12:21 AM
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Old 04-11-2017, 03:19 AM
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Thanks Poppy79. In some ways I feel like I'm doing awesome because I haven't drunk for 161 days but in other ways I feel like I'm doing terrible. Just so bloody low at the moment. No one in the real world knows of course but I keep having to take the dog out so I can cry in private. Not even sure what I'm crying about. I keep getting the image of peeling an onion. Feel like layer after layer is getting peeled away. Never felt this emotional in my life. Would definitely have started drinking long before these feelings surfaced. Guess I just need to go with it and cry if that's what I feel like I need to do. At least the dog is getting plenty of walks. Every cloud.....
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Old 04-11-2017, 04:22 AM
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Hello nobenders and welcome Kenton!

I'm in the middle of an emotional crisis. Since Saturday I've been in this never ending fight/ misunderstanding with my BF and I just can't explain myself to him, everything I say seems to only pour oil into the fire. I know this is a bit out of context but even when I told him that he was an amazing boyfriend and that I'm generally very happy with him he said that this makes him feel like an *******. I am totally confused and I don't know what to do. He doesn't want to see me and I feel like he totally misunderstood me and I don't have the chance to clarify things. I was in a bad place to begin with and opened up about some very personal worries / insecurities cause he asked me to and now this happend and instead of support I get anger and a cold shoulder from him. I feel so helpless and I feel like I'm gonna drink tonight cause I tried journaling and all my other tools but I can't deal with these emotions, it's destroying me.
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Old 04-11-2017, 04:23 AM
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A lot of people find they;re depressed after they sober up...not so much that it's a new phenomenon, but the depression was masked by the drinking before.

Have you considered seeing a doctor about it Kenton?

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Old 04-11-2017, 04:27 AM
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Hi Kev'

I'm sorry you're upset but drinking's not going to help.

A lot of us are fixers at heart - I know it's really hard for me to sit with something that's unresolved, or something I feel I'm being shut out of....

but I try to remember that there are some days I want solitude to sort things out in my mind, and that my partner only wants the same thing.

Try and give him that space - have faith that nothings fundamentally broken, and I'm sure things will be sorted out in a day or two

The good thing is you're not alone and you have support here on SR.

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Old 04-11-2017, 05:25 AM
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Hi Kevlarsjal, I'm sorry you're feeling like this. From someone struggling with emotions to another, please don't drink tonight. That way, you never know .. we might feel better tomorrow. Just don't drink tonight.
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Old 04-11-2017, 05:33 AM
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I hope everyone stays the course today. Even if this thread is quiet, go post in another one...help is there for all

Bed time for me - night

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Old 04-11-2017, 05:42 AM
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Thank you Dee and Kenton! Your words mean a lot to me.

Today will be a real test. I'm in front of the supermarket and i don't dare going inside cause part of me is playing with the thought of buying a bottle of wine and that thought is cheering me up way too much. Then I think don't buy it, you don't wanna go down that road, then I think I'm not that much of an alcoholic anyway so what's the matter with a bit of wine, then I think I need to buy it just to feel 'safe' but I won't drink any, then I think I will lose my BF if I drank out of this situation

I just spoke to my therapist about this. Luckily we had an appointment for today. She says my BF is manipulative and slightly abusive and has no right to shout at me and use rude language. And that he has no reason to justify this behaviour because I cried. Now I feel bad. I thought I did something wrong and now she says that he's not treating me in a good way. I am so confused. I thought I needed to apologise, explain and fix the situation. But she made it sound like he might just be nasty to me. I don't know what to do anymore.
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Old 04-11-2017, 06:00 AM
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There's an HBO documentary called Risky Drinking that I thought was good. It's on demand.

I was having a hard time thinking about drinking a lot, but that seems to have subsided.

That's all I have time for right now

Ttylxox fellow Nobenders
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Old 04-11-2017, 10:13 AM
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Hello, all! I finally have internet back after the big move. I've really been missing catching up with all of you every day. We're almost done unloading boxes and I feel like I need a vacation.

I'll catch up on all of your posts when I have a little more time tomorrow.
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Old 04-11-2017, 03:11 PM
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Only you can really assess if your therapist is right or not K. I don't know.

I hope you'll stay away from booze tho

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