Omg he is all over FB kissing another woman
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: USA
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Originally Posted by Jodie77 
I can't imagine him treating her poorly because the Greek community won't tolerate it.
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: USA
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Originally Posted by Jodie77
This is not normal. He was pleading and begging for me not too long ago. He said he will never leave me and that he loves me. Then turns around and cuts me out for some other woman in the blink of an eye (unless he was cheating the whole time). I feel like our whole relationship was a scam, a lie. Every day I wake up the pain gets worse NOT better.
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Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: USA
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Originally Posted by Jodie77
You're all right! This guy is a ***&$8$ pig! He abuses his kids, women in general, his employees and anyone else he feels entitled to. He wears a mask of gratitude and kindness but inwardly he's a self centered, sadistic, emotionally abusive, immature, addict pos with serious character flaws and a personality disorder.
I CHOOSE to NOT be his victim ever again! Period. And I pray by the grace of God I get restitution and retribution and that karma comes back on him. He's a self centered narcissistic abuser and followed exactly in his father's pig's footsteps! Both abuse and abandon women and both are adored by their Greek community bc they are good looking and have money. The whole picture disgusts me! It enrages me.
And I believe GOD removed me from this situation to save me from something catastrophic. I just need to remind myself of that daily.
And I am in debt to ALL of you for taking the time to read and respond and so kindly care about my feelings and pain. I have so much gratitude toward my SR family, and a lot of your compassionate posts made me cry.
I know I have a long road of healing ahead but by the grace of God I will get there. And I can't wait to share that glorious day with all of you when all of this pain and insanity and madness and chaos is finally put to bed.
I CHOOSE to NOT be his victim ever again! Period. And I pray by the grace of God I get restitution and retribution and that karma comes back on him. He's a self centered narcissistic abuser and followed exactly in his father's pig's footsteps! Both abuse and abandon women and both are adored by their Greek community bc they are good looking and have money. The whole picture disgusts me! It enrages me.
And I believe GOD removed me from this situation to save me from something catastrophic. I just need to remind myself of that daily.
And I am in debt to ALL of you for taking the time to read and respond and so kindly care about my feelings and pain. I have so much gratitude toward my SR family, and a lot of your compassionate posts made me cry.
I know I have a long road of healing ahead but by the grace of God I will get there. And I can't wait to share that glorious day with all of you when all of this pain and insanity and madness and chaos is finally put to bed.
torquemax777
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Montrose CO
Posts: 350
Jodie, when I went thru my divorce; married 9 years to my high school sweetheart (we both lost our virginity to each other) we had three daughters, we were only 28 at the time, I lost 30 or 40 pounds in 2 or 3 months! I actually needed to but ...
Anyway, a counselor told me to eat lots of carbs (just for awhile) because 1) they are comfort food, 2) they are a sort of natural antidepressant/sedative, and 3) it's not good to lose weight via starving yourself and carbs seem to be better "stomached" when you can't stomach anything else; think toast/crackers when you have the stomach flu or surgery.
Anyway, after that relationship ended, 5 years later I married my now alcoholic husband, suffered a year without him two years into our marriage when he got his 5th DUI, we've had 4 miscarriages all WELL far into the pregnancy, my ex husband put a PERMANENT restraining order on him which still makes it hard to visit my now adult daughters, and a slew of other things that were a hell of a lot worse than the divorce; but didn't seem to be as painful BECAUSE I had made it thru that painful divorce...
All that I guess to say that the whole, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" must indeed be true!
You sound better today
Eat some Mac n cheese and watch a great comedy/comedian! "Laughter is the best medicine" it's also true!
Anyway, a counselor told me to eat lots of carbs (just for awhile) because 1) they are comfort food, 2) they are a sort of natural antidepressant/sedative, and 3) it's not good to lose weight via starving yourself and carbs seem to be better "stomached" when you can't stomach anything else; think toast/crackers when you have the stomach flu or surgery.
Anyway, after that relationship ended, 5 years later I married my now alcoholic husband, suffered a year without him two years into our marriage when he got his 5th DUI, we've had 4 miscarriages all WELL far into the pregnancy, my ex husband put a PERMANENT restraining order on him which still makes it hard to visit my now adult daughters, and a slew of other things that were a hell of a lot worse than the divorce; but didn't seem to be as painful BECAUSE I had made it thru that painful divorce...
All that I guess to say that the whole, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" must indeed be true!
You sound better today
Eat some Mac n cheese and watch a great comedy/comedian! "Laughter is the best medicine" it's also true!
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Location: USA
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Originally Posted by Sungrl
Let's not stereotype Italian men please. You have never met my PapPap.
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Actually you sound like me. I've ruminated over the same questions and still don't have an answer. I do think its awfully odd that they are posting photos all over social media like they have to prove something. He sounds very immature. I almost wonder if he knows you will look. I mean after five years he knows you pretty well. One of my first bad fights with my ex he put his profile back up on dating site not BC he wanted to date but BC he knew I would look and he wanted to hurt me.
A work in progress
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
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Originally Posted by Jodie77
That's the piece I'm missing. Why does he WANT to hurt me? Why.
STOP trying to analyze it. You will never crawl inside his head and know anything for sure (and inside his head sounds like an icky place you don't want to go, anyway).
He's selfish and treated you like crap. It wasn't about you, it's about him.
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Alaska
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Originally Posted by Jodie77
That's the piece I'm missing. Why does he WANT to hurt me? Why.
If your question is related to the abuse he put you through, another book that helped me start to let go of wondering why is Why Does He Do That: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft.
I also wanted to know WHY, with AXH. Sometimes I still catch myself wondering. (Now, though, it's more of an abstract wonder, not a NEED.) But, you know what? I think he just didn't really even think about how his actions affected me. He wanted what he wanted. I didn't factor in at all, even if at the time I was what he wanted. I was part of what he wanted, but I wasn't really "Me" to him. So when I didn't fit what he wanted anymore, he found some one else who he thought did. Does that make sense?
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Location: USA
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Originally Posted by Jodie77
That's the piece I'm missing. Why does he WANT to hurt me? Why.
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 135
Originally Posted by Jodie77
That's the piece I'm missing. Why does he WANT to hurt me? Why.
As the days pass and you realize the truth about this "man" ... you will be thankful that this all happened. The best gift he gave you was to set you free so you can eventually meet a MAN that will cherish you.
HUGS!!!!
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Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: My Happy Place
Posts: 700
I think it is an assumption to get in the mindset that he purposely posting them to hurt you.
I don't think that is the case, I wouldn't think it ever is. I mean my mind would not go there.
That kind of thinking just keeps you asking the same questions over and over like you are doing.
He is not posting the pictures to hurt you, he is not thinking of you at all.
(as others have pointed out)
He has moved on and the pictures confirm that.
I don't believe it's some master plan to get you to see them and send you rushing after him, or make you feel he is still interested and trying to make you jealous or whatever.
You were doing great Jodi with the anger and you seemed to be understanding how his mind is working right now.
Now you are pondering why is he trying to hurt you again.
You are looking for answers and I think the answer is staring right at you.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT HURTING YOU
it's him doing what he does.
I don't think that is the case, I wouldn't think it ever is. I mean my mind would not go there.
That kind of thinking just keeps you asking the same questions over and over like you are doing.
He is not posting the pictures to hurt you, he is not thinking of you at all.
(as others have pointed out)
He has moved on and the pictures confirm that.
I don't believe it's some master plan to get you to see them and send you rushing after him, or make you feel he is still interested and trying to make you jealous or whatever.
You were doing great Jodi with the anger and you seemed to be understanding how his mind is working right now.
Now you are pondering why is he trying to hurt you again.
You are looking for answers and I think the answer is staring right at you.
THIS IS NOT ABOUT HURTING YOU
it's him doing what he does.
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Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 5,103
Why does he WANT to hurt me? Why.
What if he’s just living his life, doing what most people do these days, posting on facebook.
I think when we continue to try and keep making their actions about us that’s our way of remaining attached to them.
Let go or be dragged – the choice is yours.
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