Friend thinks I have a drug problem
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Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 3
Friend thinks I have a drug problem
Hello everyone!
I'm new here and I hope it's ok to ask for your opinion on the following:
I had a conversation with a friend yesterday and we talked about my habit of thinking too much and getting worked up about things. She asked me if there was any situation where I was able to relax completely and stop thinking, so I told her honestly that the only time I can completely let go and relax is when I'm either drunk or high. I think I shocked her a bit with that statement, which wasn't my intention... it probably contradicted the way she had seen me until then. In her opinion this is alarming and I should talk to someone "before it gets worse". I think this is rubbish because I rarely do these things. Now she thinks I'm in denial and playing things down. I am perfectly aware that alcohol and drugs are bad but as long as you don't use any of it on a regular base, I don't really see a problem there.
To make this clear: I have never been really drunk (never had a blackout or puked or whatever) and I don't even remember exactly the last time I've taken something because I do it so rarely. My drug experiences are limited to weed and mdma (and ritalin if you want to count that), I don't really the urge to try anything else. I went through a bad time when I was 17/18 when I was finishing school and had a lots of problems with my girlfriend at that time. I relied on caffeine pills and ritalin for studying for my exams and smoked weed any other day to relax. I realise this wasn't the best way to deal with problems but I stopped doing it after I finished school and broke up with my gf. I tried mdma for the first time shortly afterwards but then I didn't take anything for a year. In the last 1.5 years I have occasionally smoked weed and taken mdma but it's far from being a regular thing. I never had any bad experiences and I have set certain rules for myself, like never doing it alone and only buying stuff from certain friends that I know have experience with this kind of thing. I still love the feeling I get when Im using mdma but that's exactly why I rarely allow myself to do it. I think if I ever start doing it regularly might get much more suggestible and might get curious about trying other things. My friend's opinion is that it doesn't matter how often I do it but the reasons for doing it, so what I call "having fun" she classifies as substance abuse. I think she is overreacting but I'd like to hear your opinion.
I'm new here and I hope it's ok to ask for your opinion on the following:
I had a conversation with a friend yesterday and we talked about my habit of thinking too much and getting worked up about things. She asked me if there was any situation where I was able to relax completely and stop thinking, so I told her honestly that the only time I can completely let go and relax is when I'm either drunk or high. I think I shocked her a bit with that statement, which wasn't my intention... it probably contradicted the way she had seen me until then. In her opinion this is alarming and I should talk to someone "before it gets worse". I think this is rubbish because I rarely do these things. Now she thinks I'm in denial and playing things down. I am perfectly aware that alcohol and drugs are bad but as long as you don't use any of it on a regular base, I don't really see a problem there.
To make this clear: I have never been really drunk (never had a blackout or puked or whatever) and I don't even remember exactly the last time I've taken something because I do it so rarely. My drug experiences are limited to weed and mdma (and ritalin if you want to count that), I don't really the urge to try anything else. I went through a bad time when I was 17/18 when I was finishing school and had a lots of problems with my girlfriend at that time. I relied on caffeine pills and ritalin for studying for my exams and smoked weed any other day to relax. I realise this wasn't the best way to deal with problems but I stopped doing it after I finished school and broke up with my gf. I tried mdma for the first time shortly afterwards but then I didn't take anything for a year. In the last 1.5 years I have occasionally smoked weed and taken mdma but it's far from being a regular thing. I never had any bad experiences and I have set certain rules for myself, like never doing it alone and only buying stuff from certain friends that I know have experience with this kind of thing. I still love the feeling I get when Im using mdma but that's exactly why I rarely allow myself to do it. I think if I ever start doing it regularly might get much more suggestible and might get curious about trying other things. My friend's opinion is that it doesn't matter how often I do it but the reasons for doing it, so what I call "having fun" she classifies as substance abuse. I think she is overreacting but I'd like to hear your opinion.
Guest
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posts: 1,476
Some people can pull off recreational drug use when they are younger and as they mature, it just kind of goes away by itself.
No big deal
But then again, there are many who think, yeah... I'll get away with it, I'll maintain control, but they don't.
Detoxs and rehabilitation programs are big business.
Your story is how it starts out...... How your story ends...... Time will tell
No big deal
But then again, there are many who think, yeah... I'll get away with it, I'll maintain control, but they don't.
Detoxs and rehabilitation programs are big business.
Your story is how it starts out...... How your story ends...... Time will tell
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Thailand
Posts: 824
Doesnt sound like It but I loved ecstasy and that got me into the drugs scene heavily through raving every weekend. I had a mate die from getting heavily into raving like me but he'd take loads of strong speed as well whereas id have just a gram of speed and a few E's. I smoked weed to come down he tried smack and it took over, found with no veins left in his feet and he'd have been brain damaged even if they could have saved him from his od. He always wanted to be wasted though, was in a semi decent band that did a world tour but drugs got the better of him. I'd say from what you've said if that's the gods honest truth you should be ok just be aware that stuff like heroin doesn't discriminate. I love house music and raving but that scene normalised drugs for me massively which was a small part of my undoing at the end
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Lambare
Posts: 12
Originally Posted by Lear 
Hello everyone!
I'm new here and I hope it's ok to ask for your opinion on the following:
I had a conversation with a friend yesterday and we talked about my habit of thinking too much and getting worked up about things. She asked me if there was any situation where I was able to relax completely and stop thinking, so I told her honestly that the only time I can completely let go and relax is when I'm either drunk or high. I think I shocked her a bit with that statement, which wasn't my intention... it probably contradicted the way she had seen me until then. In her opinion this is alarming and I should talk to someone "before it gets worse". I think this is rubbish because I rarely do these things. Now she thinks I'm in denial and playing things down. I am perfectly aware that alcohol and drugs are bad but as long as you don't use any of it on a regular base, I don't really see a problem there.
To make this clear: I have never been really drunk (never had a blackout or puked or whatever) and I don't even remember exactly the last time I've taken something because I do it so rarely. My drug experiences are limited to weed and mdma (and ritalin if you want to count that), I don't really the urge to try anything else. I went through a bad time when I was 17/18 when I was finishing school and had a lots of problems with my girlfriend at that time. I relied on caffeine pills and ritalin for studying for my exams and smoked weed any other day to relax. I realise this wasn't the best way to deal with problems but I stopped doing it after I finished school and broke up with my gf. I tried mdma for the first time shortly afterwards but then I didn't take anything for a year. In the last 1.5 years I have occasionally smoked weed and taken mdma but it's far from being a regular thing. I never had any bad experiences and I have set certain rules for myself, like never doing it alone and only buying stuff from certain friends that I know have experience with this kind of thing. I still love the feeling I get when Im using mdma but that's exactly why I rarely allow myself to do it. I think if I ever start doing it regularly might get much more suggestible and might get curious about trying other things. My friend's opinion is that it doesn't matter how often I do it but the reasons for doing it, so what I call "having fun" she classifies as substance abuse. I think she is overreacting but I'd like to hear your opinion.
I'm new here and I hope it's ok to ask for your opinion on the following:
I had a conversation with a friend yesterday and we talked about my habit of thinking too much and getting worked up about things. She asked me if there was any situation where I was able to relax completely and stop thinking, so I told her honestly that the only time I can completely let go and relax is when I'm either drunk or high. I think I shocked her a bit with that statement, which wasn't my intention... it probably contradicted the way she had seen me until then. In her opinion this is alarming and I should talk to someone "before it gets worse". I think this is rubbish because I rarely do these things. Now she thinks I'm in denial and playing things down. I am perfectly aware that alcohol and drugs are bad but as long as you don't use any of it on a regular base, I don't really see a problem there.
To make this clear: I have never been really drunk (never had a blackout or puked or whatever) and I don't even remember exactly the last time I've taken something because I do it so rarely. My drug experiences are limited to weed and mdma (and ritalin if you want to count that), I don't really the urge to try anything else. I went through a bad time when I was 17/18 when I was finishing school and had a lots of problems with my girlfriend at that time. I relied on caffeine pills and ritalin for studying for my exams and smoked weed any other day to relax. I realise this wasn't the best way to deal with problems but I stopped doing it after I finished school and broke up with my gf. I tried mdma for the first time shortly afterwards but then I didn't take anything for a year. In the last 1.5 years I have occasionally smoked weed and taken mdma but it's far from being a regular thing. I never had any bad experiences and I have set certain rules for myself, like never doing it alone and only buying stuff from certain friends that I know have experience with this kind of thing. I still love the feeling I get when Im using mdma but that's exactly why I rarely allow myself to do it. I think if I ever start doing it regularly might get much more suggestible and might get curious about trying other things. My friend's opinion is that it doesn't matter how often I do it but the reasons for doing it, so what I call "having fun" she classifies as substance abuse. I think she is overreacting but I'd like to hear your opinion.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 1,552
Nooooo!!!!
Retired raver here. I struggle everyday with the lovely imbalance of brain chemistry thanks to the "mild" use of ecstacy. I remember a time when I LOVED it. Nothing was better, and I thought I could do it and would do it forever. Then it stopped working as well. It took more and more to achieve the effect. Clinically, it floods your brain with seratonin, depleting the natural levels in your brain. Once you decide "it's just not working like it should, I'll quit" the damage is done. The brain is now lazy and incapable of making seratonin on it's own leaving the user with a disconnected feeling, severe depression...etc. MDMA was a failed experimental anti depression medication that fell into public recreational use. It was suppose to be helpful in marriage therapy.
I spend my days disconnected from society. It feels as though I watch the world from behind a plexiglass wall and I fear mild brain damage as a result of my MDMA use that is irreversible. And I didn't use it a lot. Please cut it out of your life before it's too late. It is a lot of work trying to function in the world this burnt out.
Jennifer
Retired raver here. I struggle everyday with the lovely imbalance of brain chemistry thanks to the "mild" use of ecstacy. I remember a time when I LOVED it. Nothing was better, and I thought I could do it and would do it forever. Then it stopped working as well. It took more and more to achieve the effect. Clinically, it floods your brain with seratonin, depleting the natural levels in your brain. Once you decide "it's just not working like it should, I'll quit" the damage is done. The brain is now lazy and incapable of making seratonin on it's own leaving the user with a disconnected feeling, severe depression...etc. MDMA was a failed experimental anti depression medication that fell into public recreational use. It was suppose to be helpful in marriage therapy.
I spend my days disconnected from society. It feels as though I watch the world from behind a plexiglass wall and I fear mild brain damage as a result of my MDMA use that is irreversible. And I didn't use it a lot. Please cut it out of your life before it's too late. It is a lot of work trying to function in the world this burnt out.
Jennifer
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 508
Originally Posted by countrygirl2014
I spend my days disconnected from society. It feels as though I watch the world from behind a plexiglass wall. It is a lot of work trying to function in the world this burnt out. Jennifer
Always thought I was invincible. Been told I have an addictive personality 15 years ago. Haven't touched class A drugs on a regular basis for as long but, and it's a big BUT I thought I'd be alright with alcohol as a replacement for the 'missing highs' I spent years thinking I was ok, my drinking was normal, I quit alcohol, using AVRT, when I CHOSE to quit, I had such a HUGE natural HIGH I've been happily not drinking or drugging since then. I miss the highs, I miss the chemically induced 'freedom' yet I'm not keen on spending the rest of my life looking for something that only exists in my head. It's my life and I'm wasting it, not getting any younger, constantly thinking this life is too hard without those occasional 'freedoms' problem for me; I've made my life a prison cell in my head, so much doubt about my ability to make the right choices.
Wishing YOU the very best choices for YOU and LIFE.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: n/a
Posts: 6
Hello,
I am new to this website, but not new to NA. I am very ashamed to say I am an addict and thank the good lord i am not an alcoholic. I have the disease of addiction which is not all about the drugs. Because I used (not always abused) drugs and that awful drug alcohol for "fun" is how I got this disease. It has manifested itself through me not only mentally, but spiritually and emotionally. I am so very greatful there are the 12 steps that has helped me to see how my usage caused all my problems. I have never been to jail or institutions, but i do have "inner" unmanageability inasmuch as I have trouble identifying alot of feelings. For myself when I came back to the rooms, I could only feel anger, fear and happiness. By living in addiction for many years of life such as having friends and boyfriends who drank, I did alot of "controlled" using. Just the fact that I drank or did other drugs to make me feel better or have fun was bad enough to continue on this road to recovery.
For anyone who doesnt think they have a problem, I would suggest going to a 12 step program for atleast six months. My own self-centeredness did not allow me to see how bad my life was nor did it let me see how much control the drugs had over me.
I would also suggest that you do some more "controlled" using and see if you can stop. If you cannot stop for any length of time, I would suggest you have a problem. I could not stop for very long, 3 or 4 months was the longest on my own willpower. I am greatfully recovering from this disease called addiction today and so very greatful to be alive and clean today.
I am new to this website, but not new to NA. I am very ashamed to say I am an addict and thank the good lord i am not an alcoholic. I have the disease of addiction which is not all about the drugs. Because I used (not always abused) drugs and that awful drug alcohol for "fun" is how I got this disease. It has manifested itself through me not only mentally, but spiritually and emotionally. I am so very greatful there are the 12 steps that has helped me to see how my usage caused all my problems. I have never been to jail or institutions, but i do have "inner" unmanageability inasmuch as I have trouble identifying alot of feelings. For myself when I came back to the rooms, I could only feel anger, fear and happiness. By living in addiction for many years of life such as having friends and boyfriends who drank, I did alot of "controlled" using. Just the fact that I drank or did other drugs to make me feel better or have fun was bad enough to continue on this road to recovery.
For anyone who doesnt think they have a problem, I would suggest going to a 12 step program for atleast six months. My own self-centeredness did not allow me to see how bad my life was nor did it let me see how much control the drugs had over me.
I would also suggest that you do some more "controlled" using and see if you can stop. If you cannot stop for any length of time, I would suggest you have a problem. I could not stop for very long, 3 or 4 months was the longest on my own willpower. I am greatfully recovering from this disease called addiction today and so very greatful to be alive and clean today.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: n/a
Posts: 6
NEVER say NEVER. I get concerned for people who think they will NEVER use again. You may be in denial or setting yourself up to drink again. My best intentions led me down a road of destruction. I wish you all the best in your recovery. All we have is Today. I can only stay clean One Day at a Time.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Thailand
Posts: 824
Exactly - just setting yourself up for a fall saying never and I think potentially Allowing yourself to start weakening mentally - can only be one day at a time, one moment at a time that's all we have. Speculating about the future when you are an addict like me doesn't usually work out to well for me. Day by day, slow n steady.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 146
I hear alot of people say if you are asking yourself if you might have a problem, chances are you do. But, I would suggest that you educate yourself about what addiction is and find out for yourself. It is progressive, starting out pretty harmless and under control, but gradually gains more and more control of the addict as he or she gives in to the urge to use more and more often. We end up using because we can't say no anymore and loose the freedom of choice.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2015
Posts: 3
Thank you for all your replies and advice!
I have more or less decided to stop altogether. Mostly because I've been in a relationhip since October and found out some time ago that my boyfriend is 100% against any type of drug (except alcohol, but only moderately). He doesn't know that I'm not as averse as he is. For some time I thought about talking to him about it but in the end I decided to just quit altogether.
At the moment I'm struggling a bit because I'm supposed to study for my exams, write a few papers and things but I'm completely unable to do it because I feel like **** all the time. I feel completely drained and exhausted, I don't have the energy to do anything. I know that if I didn't have my boyfriend I'd probably had done something against this weeks ago. So it's probably good that I'm with him because it made me think about this more and realise that it wouldn't be good to rely on chemicals to go through a rough time.
It makes me angry that I think about this again and it also makes me angry that I'm not able to take anything because I promised myself to not do it. And I don't want to endanger my relationship with this ****.
Does it ever get better? It's been 5 or 6 months, I think. I don't miss it at all when everything is fine but as soon as things get a bit difficult and think about it again. I won't take anything, so it's not really a problem but sometimes it's a lot more difficult.
I have more or less decided to stop altogether. Mostly because I've been in a relationhip since October and found out some time ago that my boyfriend is 100% against any type of drug (except alcohol, but only moderately). He doesn't know that I'm not as averse as he is. For some time I thought about talking to him about it but in the end I decided to just quit altogether.
At the moment I'm struggling a bit because I'm supposed to study for my exams, write a few papers and things but I'm completely unable to do it because I feel like **** all the time. I feel completely drained and exhausted, I don't have the energy to do anything. I know that if I didn't have my boyfriend I'd probably had done something against this weeks ago. So it's probably good that I'm with him because it made me think about this more and realise that it wouldn't be good to rely on chemicals to go through a rough time.
It makes me angry that I think about this again and it also makes me angry that I'm not able to take anything because I promised myself to not do it. And I don't want to endanger my relationship with this ****.
Does it ever get better? It's been 5 or 6 months, I think. I don't miss it at all when everything is fine but as soon as things get a bit difficult and think about it again. I won't take anything, so it's not really a problem but sometimes it's a lot more difficult.
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Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Glad to see you checking back. So many post and never return.
The hallmark of addiction and of how addicts cope with difficulty. We escape to our drug of choice (DOC). Part of recovery--as opposed to merely abstinence from our DOC--is learning how to cope with difficulty. Some of us can read a couple of self-help books, listen to a life-improvement CD, others need one-on-one help from a professional, yet still others need the 12-steps to completely revamp our lives.
You are in school. You might see what kind of counseling help is available.
Originally Posted by Lear
I don't miss it at all when everything is fine but as soon as things get a bit difficult and think about it again. I won't take anything, so it's not really a problem but sometimes it's a lot more difficult.
You are in school. You might see what kind of counseling help is available.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 146
At the moment I'm struggling a bit because I'm supposed to study for my exams, write a few papers and things but I'm completely unable to do it because I feel like **** all the time. I feel completely drained and exhausted, I don't have the energy to do anything.
Good for you in a wise decision to quit! Keep coming back!
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