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Just not a group person

Old 11-25-2008, 09:52 AM
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Just not a group person

I am in my 18th day sober after many tries over about 10 years. I have tried almost every group out there - AA, RR, Smart Recovery, even Moderation Management - It just did not work.

My latest attempt (which so far is working ) is using this forum daily, talking with my husband almost daily about how it is going (he never thought I had a problem but is very supportive because he knows that I know I have a problem and he believes me. I also have a good friend that I walk with every week who I talk about my drinking with. I also have some good reading from all the groups I have attended (RR and Smart both have written things that work for me, and the Big Book has some things I can relate to in it).

So far reading, talking, visiting this forum is my formula and it is working so far. Any other advice from this secular forum group?

So grateful for having found this forum.
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Old 11-25-2008, 10:08 AM
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Welcome, KindBird.

I don't believe that groups get you sober, they are one tool of many. There are several people on SR who are sober without attending groups. If you have a good support system at home and find online support helpful then I wouldn't say f2f groups are a must. If I lived where you live, I'd be going to LifeRing meetings. But, I really need the f2f element.. I'm needy.

I believe there are as many paths to recovery as there are addicted individuals, and that's quite a few!

DK
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Old 11-25-2008, 10:22 AM
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Hi Kindbird, I agree with DK. One thing I would say is while F2F groups don't get you sober, they can help keep you that way.

Reading, talking, visiting SR....all great things to do, maybe you could think of taking up a hobby to fill some of that time you now probably have?
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Old 11-25-2008, 04:27 PM
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Hi kindbird and welcome!

Sounds like you are on the right track....drinking use to take up so much time so when I quit I had to find other constructive things to do instead. I think exercise is paramount to a healthy recovery as our bodies need the natural stimulation. Reading is wonderful as I have a hard time thinking and reading at the same time. My best advise would be to rediscover life and all that it has to offer!

Best of luck...keep posting.
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Old 11-25-2008, 04:30 PM
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Also, have you read 'Under the Influence' and 'Beyond the Influence'?

A lot of people here recommend them.

Like Bugs says, exercise is good too...and eating healthily.
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Old 11-29-2008, 08:35 PM
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I think taking what works from you from any/all resources is the best way to be successful. I am forced to attend 2 meetings a week that are 12 step based, it's not a huge deal, but I have found that my work online does more for me than any 12 step meeting because I do not put all my faith in one source.Taking what I need from many sources gives me the type of recovery that is long lasting.
If something works, keep doing it!!
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Old 12-01-2008, 12:43 PM
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Thanks to all for the feedback. In day 24 and still doing daily reading, logging in, talking with my husband and my good friend who gets it. I never thought sobriety would feel so good. After 3 weeks I am finally losing some of the habitual thoughts about drinking - and love the new things I am doing (cleaning things around the house, knitting, resting - as in actually taking naps on the weekend if I can). I now like the things I drink instead of wine (cranberry juice, water, tea, an occasional soda or lemonade).

This forum is just amazing - any time day or night there is support, experience, tenderness, compassion. and fun..
It is good to know that meetings are there if I need them.
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