it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Northern CA
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it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral
From equus:
it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral....
That is a capsule summary of how we change.
Think: recognize your situation, acknowledge the problem you have, be aware of the damage you are doing to yourself and to others.
Decide: make a firm commitment to change, for abstinence, for lifestyle changes, for healthier thinking and living.
Act: learn and implement tools for dealing with urges, for coping with the factors that led us to drink or which made it difficult to stop.
Celebrate every step forward. Learn from every step backward. Seek help from others if that is your style and if it will be useful. Do something every day to enhance the changes. Keep thinking, keep the decision foremost in your mind, and act every day on behalf of your healthier life.
Thank you, equus, for this succinct outline.
it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral....
That is a capsule summary of how we change.
Think: recognize your situation, acknowledge the problem you have, be aware of the damage you are doing to yourself and to others.
Decide: make a firm commitment to change, for abstinence, for lifestyle changes, for healthier thinking and living.
Act: learn and implement tools for dealing with urges, for coping with the factors that led us to drink or which made it difficult to stop.
Celebrate every step forward. Learn from every step backward. Seek help from others if that is your style and if it will be useful. Do something every day to enhance the changes. Keep thinking, keep the decision foremost in your mind, and act every day on behalf of your healthier life.
Thank you, equus, for this succinct outline.
It did kind of rock!! (I mean watching it not my summary).
You know what the irony was for me? After the last time D drank, he went as he had before for alcohol counselling; only the counsellor we got was totally anti - thinking. I asked for a reference and all hell broke loose with D being told that learning would only make him an knowledgable drunk!
Yet what happened showed the EXACT opposite, as D learned his thinking changed, by giving information, references, and allowing his own choices he says I helped and I believe him. I was there through his trying moderation and on SR defended his right to, I was there after 'slips' and when they got common and 'relapse' became likely, I was there to see how thinking and learning changed decisions.
It's why I have faith in the future, while it won't be problem free because life isn't, whatever the problem we can both be flexible enough to keep looking for what works.
But this is what I saw, with D. If D had been someone else, if his preference was to be directed in change, if he had less curiosity I doubt he'd be my husband for a start and secondly he may have RIGHTLY chosen a different path.
You know what the irony was for me? After the last time D drank, he went as he had before for alcohol counselling; only the counsellor we got was totally anti - thinking. I asked for a reference and all hell broke loose with D being told that learning would only make him an knowledgable drunk!
Yet what happened showed the EXACT opposite, as D learned his thinking changed, by giving information, references, and allowing his own choices he says I helped and I believe him. I was there through his trying moderation and on SR defended his right to, I was there after 'slips' and when they got common and 'relapse' became likely, I was there to see how thinking and learning changed decisions.
It's why I have faith in the future, while it won't be problem free because life isn't, whatever the problem we can both be flexible enough to keep looking for what works.
But this is what I saw, with D. If D had been someone else, if his preference was to be directed in change, if he had less curiosity I doubt he'd be my husband for a start and secondly he may have RIGHTLY chosen a different path.
it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral....
Anyway, I really love SMART because it helps me work on some problems I have wanted to battle for a while. For example, I have been very indecisive and have wanted to work on that. With SMART in hand, not only have I improved that in terms of my drug abusing, but also in ways I deal with everyday life decisions.
When I slipped, I was able to think,decide,act really quick. It had become a process, and it saved my life.
I'm an addict.
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Hyde Park, NY
Posts: 1,201
I agree wholeheartedly.
When I was in the pit of dispair of my final few days of active addiction, I realized that death was preferable to the way I was living. I contemplated suicide and realized that I was way to scarred to go through with it, the other option was to ask for help. I decided to ask my family for support. THe helped me to detox. When I was able to somewhat function again, I took action by enrolling in an outpatient program and started attending NA meetings.
I have found that NA is all about thinking, deciding and acting....that is a very good way to put it equus.
THere is an old saying in NA "recovery isn't for people that need it, it's not even for people that want it, it's for people that want it AND do it."
When I was in the pit of dispair of my final few days of active addiction, I realized that death was preferable to the way I was living. I contemplated suicide and realized that I was way to scarred to go through with it, the other option was to ask for help. I decided to ask my family for support. THe helped me to detox. When I was able to somewhat function again, I took action by enrolling in an outpatient program and started attending NA meetings.
I have found that NA is all about thinking, deciding and acting....that is a very good way to put it equus.
THere is an old saying in NA "recovery isn't for people that need it, it's not even for people that want it, it's for people that want it AND do it."
Occasional poor taste poster
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 2,542
So if I said, awareness, acceptance, action, would that spark a knee jerk 12 step warning light or something? That's where I heard that phrase and I'm not a 12 stepper, but I did take what I like and leave the rest. LOL!!!
It's fascinating to be an observer, not on either side or sitting on the fence.
It's fascinating to be an observer, not on either side or sitting on the fence.
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Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: The Big Woods
Posts: 521
As a fascinated observer, not on either side but honestly still sitting on the fence, this phrase
... it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral....
resonates in me. Wow, a phrase that makes sense to me. Maybe it can be the impetus that finally gets me to come down off this fence. I keep it at the forefront of my mind. Know I appreciate. Seriously.
... it was THINKING, DECIDING and ACTING which stopped the downward spiral....
resonates in me. Wow, a phrase that makes sense to me. Maybe it can be the impetus that finally gets me to come down off this fence. I keep it at the forefront of my mind. Know I appreciate. Seriously.
Occasional poor taste poster
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 2,542
Originally Posted by aloneagainor
I keep it at the forefront of my mind. Know I appreciate. Seriously.
If its still there I eat or find something to keep my mind off the urge until it goes away. If its there because I'm overly anxious about something, I just try not to think about the stressful situation for a few minutes, until the craving goes away.
REPEAT
I know this might not work for people with extremely severe ongoing addiction problems, but its a good way to deal with cravings IMO
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