Failed won't come; back
Life Goes On
Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Baltimore, Maryland
Posts: 6,069
Lila, I'm glad you're still with us.
Whatever pain you are in can be helped, but it doesn't sound like you're going to be able to do it on your own right now. It sounds like you haven't had the best experience with rehab, but I think it may be your best option. I had some mighty big challenges in rehab myself. We have a long way to go with learning how to best treat addiction in this country, for sure. The last time (ever, God willing!) I went to rehab, I went in with the conviction that I was going to get well no matter what. Dealing with nonsense was a necessary trade-off.
Whatever you do, please keep posting and tell us what you can about what is going on with you.
You can see from this thread that we all care about our own.
O
Whatever pain you are in can be helped, but it doesn't sound like you're going to be able to do it on your own right now. It sounds like you haven't had the best experience with rehab, but I think it may be your best option. I had some mighty big challenges in rehab myself. We have a long way to go with learning how to best treat addiction in this country, for sure. The last time (ever, God willing!) I went to rehab, I went in with the conviction that I was going to get well no matter what. Dealing with nonsense was a necessary trade-off.
Whatever you do, please keep posting and tell us what you can about what is going on with you.
You can see from this thread that we all care about our own.
O
Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Europe
Posts: 440
Lila, I've been here for 10 years. Failed, but recovered. Failed, but recovered. Rinse and effin repeat.
Every time you fail, you learn - for example, the fact that the floor hit me so hard last time I was I was in a stupor, whereas my nosebleed could fill a well, was so extremely humiliating.
But guess what. I came back. I'll admit the last week was an agony, but somehow we recover, but remember; it won't last forever.
My meandering advice is; Quit while you are ahead. While 'ahead' may sound wrong to you, as I should rather term it 'in the gutter', it doesn't matter. What matters is that you remember the misery alcohol has brought you, and that you do not listen to that advocate of alcohol, that metaphorically sits on your shoulder.
Every time you fail, you learn - for example, the fact that the floor hit me so hard last time I was I was in a stupor, whereas my nosebleed could fill a well, was so extremely humiliating.
But guess what. I came back. I'll admit the last week was an agony, but somehow we recover, but remember; it won't last forever.
My meandering advice is; Quit while you are ahead. While 'ahead' may sound wrong to you, as I should rather term it 'in the gutter', it doesn't matter. What matters is that you remember the misery alcohol has brought you, and that you do not listen to that advocate of alcohol, that metaphorically sits on your shoulder.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: New England
Posts: 4,420
Glad to see you back, Lila. Maybe pass some time reading through the posts of people who have recovery time of a year and over- go back and read the beginning. It’s never pretty and easy to relate to. So many were where you are at some level, lost, hopeless and scared in the beginning. Just keep going.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 1,956
My humble suggestion is, please don't go it alone. Call a local alcohol hotline and be frank with your GP.
Alcohol is a depressant and adds complex layers such as guilt, hopelessness, breakdown of confidence etc after repeated relapses . I relapsed about 110 times last year.
Take a paper and write your plan - what are you going to do be tomorrow? Winners never quit, quitters never win. You can be a winner soon.
Alcohol is a depressant and adds complex layers such as guilt, hopelessness, breakdown of confidence etc after repeated relapses . I relapsed about 110 times last year.
Take a paper and write your plan - what are you going to do be tomorrow? Winners never quit, quitters never win. You can be a winner soon.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,240
When each one of us enters recovery, we are scared of
the unknown. Scared if we will survive life without that
crutch to relied on. That crutch, we had to learn was toxic
and poisonous to us affecting all our organs.
Our minds, all that keep us living and breathing inside.
As far as I know, no one has died as a result of entering
recovery and learning how to live a sober life. The only
ones Im familiar with are those that continue drinking
or using and their health, mind or bodies fail them.
Once we stop putting those toxins in our bodies, then
it takes time for things to begin to heal up. The fog we
were in disappears and we become willing to want to
work on being the best, healthiest person we want to
be here on out.
No one is perfect. No one is a saint. We all have been
there, done many of the same similar things in life when
under the enfluence of alcohol or drugs.
Sure, we become remorseful or full of guilt from past
actions, but, what helps us move forward is knowing
we never have to do those things again. Ever. Because
we will have learned from the past to make life better
for the future.
So many here are supporting you with care and understanding.
Many here have just used SR to help them achieve good
quality sobriety and others use other forms of help available
like rehab, their own physicians, therapy, faith, etc.
You are never not alone in this new journey in achieving
a healthy sober quality of life.
the unknown. Scared if we will survive life without that
crutch to relied on. That crutch, we had to learn was toxic
and poisonous to us affecting all our organs.
Our minds, all that keep us living and breathing inside.
As far as I know, no one has died as a result of entering
recovery and learning how to live a sober life. The only
ones Im familiar with are those that continue drinking
or using and their health, mind or bodies fail them.
Once we stop putting those toxins in our bodies, then
it takes time for things to begin to heal up. The fog we
were in disappears and we become willing to want to
work on being the best, healthiest person we want to
be here on out.
No one is perfect. No one is a saint. We all have been
there, done many of the same similar things in life when
under the enfluence of alcohol or drugs.
Sure, we become remorseful or full of guilt from past
actions, but, what helps us move forward is knowing
we never have to do those things again. Ever. Because
we will have learned from the past to make life better
for the future.
So many here are supporting you with care and understanding.
Many here have just used SR to help them achieve good
quality sobriety and others use other forms of help available
like rehab, their own physicians, therapy, faith, etc.
You are never not alone in this new journey in achieving
a healthy sober quality of life.
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