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Old 03-13-2022, 12:45 AM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Not sure what a dry drunk is exactly? I’m probably one as I quit 3 years ago, get the occasional craving and would almost certainly cave in if I had that so-called one drink. But I’m not craving every day and can live without alcohol. Life is pretty good. I think you’re doing OK, GCesp, more than OK, so carry on enjoying life.
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Old 03-13-2022, 04:07 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Hodd View Post
Not sure what a dry drunk is exactly?
Like Anna, I don't like the term dry drunk. You can't be dry (as in not drinking) and be a drunk, so it's a meaningless oxymoron. As such, it is usually used to suggest that a deeper hidden meaning is being discussed, and that usually invites one to use it in some perverse and usually derogatory way of passing judgement on someone else's sobriety. Sure, you can be sober and have other disturbing problems, but normies do too. So attaching "drunk" to a sober person who is less than he should be doesn't help much. Everyone is less than what they should be, unless someone has reached perfection.

Originally Posted by Hodd View Post
Iím probably one as I quit 3 years ago, get the occasional craving and would almost certainly cave in if I had that so-called one drink. But Iím not craving every day and can live without alcohol. Life is pretty good. I think youíre doing OK, GCesp, more than OK, so carry on enjoying life.
Any former practicing alcoholic now in recovery who never has a craving, or at least a passing thought about having a drink, is most likely pulling your leg. If you are sober, you are not a drunk, and that is a big step.
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Old 03-13-2022, 05:53 AM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Gcesp View Post
I definitely see sobriety as causing the Dunning-Kruger effect in that once you start living life to its fullest, you see not necessarily all the possibilities, but certainly more. In seeing more possibilities your overall certainty and confidence decrease because you understand that your capabilities or skillset and knowledge are almost always conditional as you become aware of how complex not only life is, but can become many of whose challenges you have not yet faced, so you feel smaller with more insight in knowing there's just so much out there that you at best may only peripherally be aware of and certainly are not as prepared as you'd like to face should it ever rear its ugly head. With your eyes opened you understand that conditions can and do change so your current skillset may not be as relevant or applicable.

But at the same time you are more adaptable as well, and because you have more time and energy, the adaptation, or unfavorable circumstances, don't bother you as much and handling adversity becomes easier. So over time you wear more hats and become a better person. You're more able to learn from the all experiences, especially when you're not as good as you should be, especially when you were good enough but just weren't because you made a mistake and it was your fault, and accept that. You also are more OK with all those times when you do your best and it's still not enough.

This is truly shocking to me how the scientific community is coming out full force against alcohol in the "NO SAFE DOSE" vertict. There is so much dis-information, and the more money, power and profit lies behind something, the more likely it is to be encouraged. So while a big chunk of me definitely has the conspiracy thought because I don't necessarily trust anything, for modern healthcare to be rallying against alcohol so much is a message that is hard to ignore, and why I took it so loud and clear.

Never heard of Dunning-Kruger but man that sure explains some things.

Alcohol hid so much from me but now that I am sober I became disoriented and way more insecure than ever. Now I understand why.
Thanks for posting that.

I am now at the 2nd stage, realizing my new found strength and gaining confidence against whatever comes along.

We can handle it much better sober

Great Post!
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Old 03-13-2022, 10:39 AM
  # 24 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by DriGuy View Post
Like Anna, I don't like the term dry drunk. You can't be dry (as in not drinking) and be a drunk, so it's a meaningless oxymoron. As such, it is usually used to suggest that a deeper hidden meaning is being discussed, and that usually invites one to use it in some perverse and usually derogatory way of passing judgement on someone else's sobriety. Sure, you can be sober and have other disturbing problems, but normies do too. So attaching "drunk" to a sober person who is less than he should be doesn't help much. Everyone is less than what they should be, unless someone has reached perfection.


Any former practicing alcoholic now in recovery who never has a craving, or at least a passing thought about having a drink, is most likely pulling your leg. If you are sober, you are not a drunk, and that is a big step.
I know enough about recovery peripherally to be dangerous but haven't needed any support that was basically my story. Not sure if I am using the term correctly what I meant by using the term dry drunk was someone who quit using alcohol but was still miserable and acted on it. That is why I am a bit incredulous. I wasn't that bad (But that's what *EVERYONE* says) and feel I quit in time but looking back I want to get some feedback from people who know more about this than I do although I definitely feel very well, better than I ever have without having to go to meetings, take meds, go to counseling. Just quitting and engaging with my nice life seemed to be enough.

I am not pulling anyone's leg though and that's exactly what I was asking. I know just enough about recovery from where I work that this is definitely recovery canon and yes, I was able to quit "just like that" so nearly 3 years later doing great, not looking back and reaching out to make sure I haven't lost my mind. I certainly feel like I haven't and have very little distress in my life, and the little bit of distress I do suffer 100% of it has nothing to do with cravings or alcohol. It's all about work, money, kids, their grades, college applications, health, and especially lately the world. It's not that bad and bothers me only a little but I would be lying if I said I was 100% stress free, am being objective here. Basically the very low (but not zero) mental distress I suffer is normal rather mild stuff but knowing what I should know am the first one to admit I could be highly biased and am using this forum as a sounding board to make sure.
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Old 03-13-2022, 10:40 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by fishkiller View Post
Never heard of Dunning-Kruger but man that sure explains some things.

Alcohol hid so much from me but now that I am sober I became disoriented and way more insecure than ever. Now I understand why.
Thanks for posting that.

I am now at the 2nd stage, realizing my new found strength and gaining confidence against whatever comes along.

We can handle it much better sober

Great Post!
I wouldn't say insecure, just more cognizant of my deficiencies but also more accepting of having them and the more than occasional failures that life hands out regardless of who or what was responsible, whether I screwed up and should have known better, or whether I did my best, or it was a random thing that wasn't preventable. Feels like I am just OK with more things regardless of what they are.
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