Finalcall

I got to do it right this time and I can't skip this step. There was a link here somewhere with some good info could someone please help.

Also any advice would be appreciated.

Going to see doctor in a few days to address my physical and emotional toils.

Optimistic that I have made this choice once and for all. Whatever it takes. Everyday.

Dee74

is this the link you want?
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)

D

Be123

One of the sneakiest aspects of my AV was telling me that because I'd tried before, and then ended up drinking again, that my plight was hopeless. So...guess what...might as well drink again!

Or worse, I'd be 4-10 days sober and tired of the battle and my AV would say, 'You know you'll drink at some point, you always do, why not go easy on yourself and give up today?'

LIES!! Every sober minute you've put together are training and practice, meaning you are closer to your goal than you were yesterday. Its just damnable lies of our addiction, every sober attempt is well worth it and adds to our resilience and ability to get sober for good.

If the AV was telling the truth then none of us would be sober. Think of the most solidly-sober person you know and see if the lies your AV tell would work on them. Would it? No. Are they any less of an addict than us? No! So it is possible, there is hope.

Hang on to that hope FC - because you've got this 👍

Finalcall

Pretty sure it is will have a read on my spare time tomorrow. Thankyou

doggonecarl

The sooner the better.

You asked for advice in your initial post. Mine would be make the time to get your plan created and implemented. You found the time to drink; you can make the time to recover.

sortofhomecomin

Mine is very detailed but I am not adhering to most of it, my anxiety is too bad.

Finalcall

I have definitely recognized a downhill pattern of behavior in the past. The more I am aware of these the better. I have to people I'm going to ask to be also aware and be able to help me recognize

Dee74

a plan that you can’t use is perhaps not a great plan. Can you simplify it?

D

Dee74

Did you get a chance to read through FC?

D

Citrus

We must have the same dang AV. That exact lie has caught me up way more times that I care to admit.

Great post Be123!! Just what I needed to hear, thank you.

Finalcall

A quick one. I have work and my daughters birthday today, work tomorrow then a 4 day weekend. I fully intend to have it all together over that time. Until then just doing what I know has worked in the early stages in the past.

Dee74

It may look daunting but it's really not much more than a pamphlette, man.
It's an easy read I promise

D

Delilah1

Sounds like you are ready to be done for good. It took me a while to finally get sobriety right, but I am so glad I finally did. I am now five years and two months sober and SR is a big part of that.

Here is what worked for me:

• Reading and posting on SR daily
• Getting outdoors for a walk each day, it is a good way to clear your head.
• Remaining in the present, I have worked on mindfulness techniques to help me with this.
• Gratitude, always look at things through this lens, no matter how difficult the day there isn’t always something to be grateful for.
• Reach out for help, that might be on SR, your doctor, a counselor, a recovery group, having a support system really helps.
• Get rid of any alcohol in your house, and fill your fridge with non-alcoholic drinks you enjoy. I love sparkling waters and green tea.
• Let go of the past. You cannot change whatever has happened, only learn from it, do not dwell on the could ofs and should ofs.
• Find something to fill the time you would have spent drinking: read, binge watch a few series, take an online class, paint, draw, exercise, write...
• Join a few groups on here, the 24 hour thread and the Class of March 2021 are two good starting points.
• Do not drink no matter what! There is nothing that can be made better with alcohol, and no situation that can’t be made worse with it.

You can do this!!

Finalcall

Really trying to get a good sense of how to know recognize triggers or ways of thinking that lead me down that road. So that I have some time/ foresight to change. I need the help of others to notice these too as sometimes I don't. This I need to understand them to explain them to my few people. And perhaps find out other early signs that things may be going down that road for me. I think, for me, I need to write it down ,share it, talk about it, and most of all trust myself and my helpers that this is obvious that I am heading down this road again. Only then can prevention long term through my ups and downs be possible.

Dee74

I think having strategies for how to deal with being triggered is maybe even better than trying to list all your triggers,or trying understand them all.

You don't need to understand the physics of fire to be a fireman - sure it may help - but in the face of the fire before you, you reach for the hose,right?

'I want to drink' is a pretty universal response to triggers - whats your next step?
do you call someone, do you post here?
do you urge surf? play the tape through?
eat something?
do you go splash cold water on your face in the gents loo?

some or all of the above?

the more strategies you have to call on, the stronger your plan will be.

Understanding stuff - that comes, and frequently does, come later.
D

Finalcall

If I want to drinkIf I think I can drinkIf I think I have earned a drinkIf I have found a drink in my hand/ been given one
the biggest part of a plan is to get the hose out?

Dee74

Well let’s get away from the hose metaphor.... the task at hand is to stop that progression from I want a drink,to I need a drink to I deserve a drink to finding the drink in your hand,to drinking it ..

You, the greater part of you, the Real you does not want to drink again - you know where that takes you - but for years I just gave up and let my addiction drive whenever I had the thought/opportunity to drink.

I had to convince myself that having the thought to drink was not the actual end of the process but the actual beginning of it...and I could change the outcome.

D