Summerof76

Amongst the excellent advice already proferred , thought I'd just add , I've found getting one of these sober apps really useful .
It only takes a minute to complete how your day went and it's good that you can see how you're progressing .
After 30 days yesterday , I was a smidgeon away from drinking again . I looked at this app and my entries and thought do I want to waste what I've achieved .
Best wishes .

FiveTries

I will look into getting an app that sounds good. I had a week sober and stupidly decided to go for dinner with friends last night where I made the decision to drink. Woke up feeling like garbage today no energy and feel like I won't ever make sobriety work. Of course while I was out there drinking I was having a great time. Now I have to start over.

Sober45

When I finally got sober 9 months ago I never let my thinking go in that direction. Romanticizing was not an option. Instead I constantly engaged in something else. I also had to rethink my views on alcohol. Unfortunately it has become normalized in most societies. But just look at the damage it does, like on heath care systems.

I can tell you that I was an every single day drinker for a long time. So is my mother. I used to think it was just “in me” to be that way and life for me would never be quite as good without a drink.

It’s all nonsense. As time goes on I have a new normal and honestly I don’t feel I’m missing out on a thing. Instead I feel lucky. Sober time has brought me clarity and emotional stability. I have self respect now.

You can do this!

b0glerd69

Hi Five,

Welcome back! You sound exactly like me (and others do in reply). I was in my early 40's, successful, house, wife, kid, car, job, possessions, holidays, etc. but inside I was dying and also becoming more and more terrified at my increasingly glaring drink problem. I went from moderation to long periods of abstinence with blow-outs each 2 - 3 months - the blow outs induced exactly the same old feelings - shame, embarrassment, fear, self-loathing, ill, etc. It was at this stage of my 'career' with alcohol, after many attempts at 'controlling it' that I realised that I had to quit for good. I had tried every angle and stopping completely was the only sane thing left. The difficult part was admitting this to myself. It was that or I was going to lose it all.

ReadyAtLast

I can also relate.I could have written your post. I hope you got through today ok. The ODAAT thing is the only thing Im doing now, as well as being on SR. Getting it back to basics and just focus on today

Dee74

I'm sorry you drank but I'm glad you're back

Nah. I haven't met anywhere here yet who's incapable of getting sober and staying that way

For me it took more than intent to stay sober though - I had to work for it, and it was hard sometimes because I did almost everything in my life with a drink in hand.

I had to make changes in my life to reflect my new aim of getting and staying sober.

Nothing wrong with going out with friends - so long as you keep the aim of sobriety foremost in your head and let that thought dictate your actions.

If you don't think you can do that yet, it's probably best to miss out a few social things until you grow some 'sober muscles'.

A good recovery action plan could help that process

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...very-plan.html (What exactly is a recovery plan?)

FiveTries

Thanks everyone for the replies. I am still working on my plan and reading here. Feel pretty good today. I had one beer at the weekend but that was all. If I am honest I plan on drinking through this weekend I am going to a Halloween party. I am trying to get full on sober after that though.

Dee74

I once had 2 months of sobriety and decided to take 'a night off' to attend a school reunion.
I didn't stop drinking again for another 18 months.

If we had the relationship with alcohol where we could drink occasionally and get back instantly to not drinking, noone would be using these boards.

I don't believe anyone can make sobriety work with a less than total commitment.

Abstinence is not control and I proved that conclusively.
I'm sure if you look back honestly on your past you've probably proved it too a few times over.

I'm sorry you drank last weekend and I really hope you decide not to drink this weekend.
regardless of how long it takes to make it back to sobriety, none of us can afford to waste anymore days and nights to active addiction.

If you go to the party sober you may not have as good a time as you were planning because your inner addict will be whipping up the self pity and resentment at other drinking...

but you will be eternally grateful to yourself the morning after

D

Wharfrat123

Usually I am hypertensive to all Grateful Dead references, but this one is lost on me?

Dee74

your user name

D

Wharfrat123

I get that Dee, I created it. I was referring to your response to the initial poster.

Dee74

I must have replied in the wrong thread, Wharf Rat - happens occasionally, lol

D