Hi, just new here
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by mikoss 
I know this all sounds bad but it is the truth.
Like you I got worse, and then suddenly I went into a downward spiral, where I recognized how serious my condition was. I realized, I had to give up all thoughts of drinking for the rest of my life, or die a drunk at the end of an empty life.
That was where I started looking for help. Hang out here and read what people are talking about. Consider what we have done to get better. You will see similarities and differences in our approaches, the commonality being a deep and serious commitment to certain "rules." They're not really rules where you get fined. They are things that were necessary for us to get well, and took us beyond that routine of continuing failure.
If this starts to make sense, you can be on your way. It's not going to happen all at once, but when it clicked for me, everything changed in a hurry. You can get better too.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 353
Yes DriGuy, it is that feeling of hopelessness I feel many times but I say to myself there has to be some hope for me to get better.
And just when I start to get better and see some hope I go into that downward spiral and become worse than before. And then finally when I was able to be sober for about a month I go back to where I was before out of addiction, depression, desperation to feel good, and an escape and hoping that finally I can learn how to make myself a better person and learn from my past choices. Like this quote I saw that said something like, "Wisdom is the reward we receive for surviving our bad choices." I just hope that I can get wisdom and just recover from addiction.
After my last incident with alcohol very recently along with cocaine it was so bad afterwards that I finally said enough was enough and I need to stop. I couldn't sleep and felt nervous and anxious and sad and crying and shaking that all I could do was take tiny sips of alcohol and take tiny bits of cocaine just to cope with the comedown it was so bad. Until a friend had to tell me no more and hide my own cocaine in front of me to stop. Finally later I was able to lie in bed and get a small bit of sleep with a bit of coke and a drink to ease the comedown a bit. Only to experience more anxiety, guilt, shame, nervousness, paranoia, insomnia, nausea, shaking, crying, it was absolutely horrible. Something I would never wish on anyone. Not to mention a friend of mine was sick and couldn't sleep as well. My friend said I almost finished a whole bottle of tequila. And that I was just laying out cocaine nonstop all night passing it around amongst friends and I was even smoking cocaine by the end of the night because I guess doing lines just got boring. I feel so guilty, ashamed and horrible about doing this and think to myself why? Why do I do this? And now here I am a little over 30 hours of no alcohol and cocaine and as each hour passes even though I don't feel my best I am starting to feel better being able to share and talk about this and my mind and body starting to feel better in just the short amount of time I stopped.
I know friends and even people I have worked with who have said that cocaine is okay and everybody does it and successful people do it and function well and it is perfectly fine and harmless and fun and all of these things and drinking alcohol is totally normal along with cocaine use but I feel that this is not true. From this recent experience I have hit bottom from these two dependencies and addictions and finally have said enough is enough and just want to get better and start recovering and be sober and clean.
My withdrawal symptoms were so bad and I was such a wreck crying all night that I was panicking and trying to look up help lines and going online just to try and find anything to start getting help and found this forum and so here I am.
And just when I start to get better and see some hope I go into that downward spiral and become worse than before. And then finally when I was able to be sober for about a month I go back to where I was before out of addiction, depression, desperation to feel good, and an escape and hoping that finally I can learn how to make myself a better person and learn from my past choices. Like this quote I saw that said something like, "Wisdom is the reward we receive for surviving our bad choices." I just hope that I can get wisdom and just recover from addiction.
After my last incident with alcohol very recently along with cocaine it was so bad afterwards that I finally said enough was enough and I need to stop. I couldn't sleep and felt nervous and anxious and sad and crying and shaking that all I could do was take tiny sips of alcohol and take tiny bits of cocaine just to cope with the comedown it was so bad. Until a friend had to tell me no more and hide my own cocaine in front of me to stop. Finally later I was able to lie in bed and get a small bit of sleep with a bit of coke and a drink to ease the comedown a bit. Only to experience more anxiety, guilt, shame, nervousness, paranoia, insomnia, nausea, shaking, crying, it was absolutely horrible. Something I would never wish on anyone. Not to mention a friend of mine was sick and couldn't sleep as well. My friend said I almost finished a whole bottle of tequila. And that I was just laying out cocaine nonstop all night passing it around amongst friends and I was even smoking cocaine by the end of the night because I guess doing lines just got boring. I feel so guilty, ashamed and horrible about doing this and think to myself why? Why do I do this? And now here I am a little over 30 hours of no alcohol and cocaine and as each hour passes even though I don't feel my best I am starting to feel better being able to share and talk about this and my mind and body starting to feel better in just the short amount of time I stopped.
I know friends and even people I have worked with who have said that cocaine is okay and everybody does it and successful people do it and function well and it is perfectly fine and harmless and fun and all of these things and drinking alcohol is totally normal along with cocaine use but I feel that this is not true. From this recent experience I have hit bottom from these two dependencies and addictions and finally have said enough is enough and just want to get better and start recovering and be sober and clean.
My withdrawal symptoms were so bad and I was such a wreck crying all night that I was panicking and trying to look up help lines and going online just to try and find anything to start getting help and found this forum and so here I am.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
alcohol + cocaine is a heart attack about to happen (if it already hasn't). I know of people who were told they had had heart attacks and didn't even know it while using cocaine.
It's not ok. Successful people don't really do it regularly.
Sobriety rocks and you are worth sobriety!!
It's not ok. Successful people don't really do it regularly.
Sobriety rocks and you are worth sobriety!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 5,169
Originally Posted by mikoss
I know friends and even people I have worked with who have said that cocaine is okay and everybody does it and successful people do it and function well and it is perfectly fine and harmless and fun and all of these things and drinking alcohol is totally normal along with cocaine use but I feel that this is not true. From this recent experience I have hit bottom from these two dependencies and addictions and finally have said enough is enough and just want to get better and start recovering and be sober and clean.
From your more in depth description, I would advise you bring this up to a doctor. If you need to come down using the hair of the dog that bit you, you may be in a physically dangerous stage of your addictions.
I don't like to label other people, but your stage of addiction seems advanced. You say, you are "probably" an alcoholic. I said that for many years while fighting my problem. You don't need to use the word but you are recognizing a problem, and if you are like I was, it may be worse than you think regardless of what you call it.
You may want to get professional help, but whatever, hang out here, and find out what those successful in recovery have done.
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Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,569
It's great to meet you, mikoss. You're among people who understand & care. I drank 30 yrs. & after finding SR I knew I'd never have to be alone with the struggle to get free. I was afraid too - alcohol was part of everything I did. Yet it was slowly stealing my spirit & enthusiasm for life. I had grown completely dependent on it to get through the day. It will kill us. We don't need it.
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 743
I got tired of doing lines in my 20s. Tired of the powder screwing up my sinuses, little rocks dropping back down my nose, bloody noses. I liked crack. I had so many terrible times coming down. Sometimes I would just sit there and sweat and shake and be paranoid about EVERYTHING. I somehow walked away from crack, until the opiate crisis. Once I got into pills a little in my mid 30s I was like oh boy, I could probably smoke all the crack I want and just take this stuff.
I loved alchohol since I was 14, no way did I see a life without it possible. Even when times got kind of tough and I had to get up very early to run, work a full day, and go to 4 hours of school. There were a few beers and OTC sleeping pills waiting for me to get me to bed. Sure I can stop drinking once I start I'll just take sleeping pills.
In my later 20s I went to a low carb diet. After 10 years of drinking every night (much of my teens were in and out of reform schools so I couldnt drink every night) i went to only drinking on weekends with an absolutely insane weekly diet. Sometimes I even went 2 weeks without drinking, white knuckling through sobriety to drop weight quickly. My record was 19 days. I thought it was tougher than any workout you could dream up. I felt like my town should have a parade for me any time I went 2 weeks without drinking!
I decided that smoking crack was crazy. Sometimes I would do lines of heroin to come down and I even shot up a couple times. I would drive drunk in a dangerous area and take money out of the ATM. It's like I once I drank I would turn into a different person and I had no control of my car or my bank account. Friends would start to call me by a different first name when I was drinking. A good friend would ask who he was speaking to when I answered the phone. Meaning have you been drinking.
So many times I would wake up completely horrified. I turned into my twin brother and he drove drunk in my car on my license and took money from checking account. What if he got busted? How am my going to keep paying for my twin's drugs? This must never happen again. How can it not happen again? Short of quitting drinking, I mean don't be silly that's not a possibility.
I went looking for a new place to live. During one of those white knuckle weekends I drove out to a rich town to look at some of the apartment complexes in person. Wide open space to run. I had no clue I would get sober here. I thought this is way too far from the place I buy crack. No way would my twin brother try and drive here drunk and carrying stuff. That's insane, now I will have a beautiful place I can drink and not have to worry about crack anymore. Probably not even that rich a town, my standards are pretty red neck.
It turns out you can't drink and drive in these rich towns. They really don't take to kindly to narcotics either. You would not believe how fast it takes to get pulled over.
They charged me with felony possession and dwi, bunch of other crap. I had a printout of police tickets that i bought to my lawyer that was literally taller than 6 feet (I'm a little under) when unraveled.
I thought I would lose my job and no longer be employable. I considered suicide, yeah I'll probably avoid prison but what will I do for a living now?
Back track to a few months ago. A good friend of mine was sober for almost a decade. He was sober and got very religious in sobriety. Even though I used for a long time after that he got me to at least believe in God again. When I saw the change in him, something did that! I'm not a church person but he got me thinking about, well how did I get here. Somehow this ability to trust in a power greater than himself got him all this stuff. He went from a transient addict a productive person. Fortunately he had a rare trade skill that was he able to pick back up and he got good breaks and made a lot of money. He got his kids back. He got a bigger, louder bike. A luxury SUV, a nice condo, then a house. A 2nd wife not too much more than half his age.
He relapsed and lost it all again after nearly a decade of really good living. Since I was 16 years old we were good friends through it all. He made another run at sobriety and he had several months clean when we spoke on the phone. 3 days later he relapsed and he was found dead the next morning.
I thought a lot about him jail, this was only a few months prior to my arrest. I never went the hardcore church route but my friend had proven to me what a belief in a higher power could do. I mean what's my purpose in life, what was I created for? I just got back to those basic fundamental ideas. This world doesn't owe me anything. Not a job or a driver's license. So what if I lose all that crap. I looked at all the stuff I do have. I mean how hard is it going to be to find food today. I think I'm owed credit cards and grocery stores. I started to look at every little thing as a gift. My health. There are little kids that will die from cancer and I'm ready to blow myself away over a stupid career or OMG I cant drink. It's like I think I'm owed good health and a decent income!
I guess I was more afraid of where I was heading then never drinking again. My lawyer said the first thing I'm gonna do is go to aa meetings every night and get somebody to sign off that I was there. It did wonders for my case.
I ended up going to 6 meetings a week in the first 90 days. I was able to relate to the literature my first night and even with all the legal chaos over my head i suddenly didn't seem to care. I started living life on life's terms, simply an attitude of whatever happens I'll deal with it. I dumped out the rest of my craft beer that first night. I didn't really have a plan of never drinking again I tried not to think about that concept. I just knew after that first meeting I wasn't drinking tonight. The constant bombardment of meetings early on made not drinking much easier than I thought was possible.
I loved alchohol since I was 14, no way did I see a life without it possible. Even when times got kind of tough and I had to get up very early to run, work a full day, and go to 4 hours of school. There were a few beers and OTC sleeping pills waiting for me to get me to bed. Sure I can stop drinking once I start I'll just take sleeping pills.
In my later 20s I went to a low carb diet. After 10 years of drinking every night (much of my teens were in and out of reform schools so I couldnt drink every night) i went to only drinking on weekends with an absolutely insane weekly diet. Sometimes I even went 2 weeks without drinking, white knuckling through sobriety to drop weight quickly. My record was 19 days. I thought it was tougher than any workout you could dream up. I felt like my town should have a parade for me any time I went 2 weeks without drinking!
I decided that smoking crack was crazy. Sometimes I would do lines of heroin to come down and I even shot up a couple times. I would drive drunk in a dangerous area and take money out of the ATM. It's like I once I drank I would turn into a different person and I had no control of my car or my bank account. Friends would start to call me by a different first name when I was drinking. A good friend would ask who he was speaking to when I answered the phone. Meaning have you been drinking.
So many times I would wake up completely horrified. I turned into my twin brother and he drove drunk in my car on my license and took money from checking account. What if he got busted? How am my going to keep paying for my twin's drugs? This must never happen again. How can it not happen again? Short of quitting drinking, I mean don't be silly that's not a possibility.
I went looking for a new place to live. During one of those white knuckle weekends I drove out to a rich town to look at some of the apartment complexes in person. Wide open space to run. I had no clue I would get sober here. I thought this is way too far from the place I buy crack. No way would my twin brother try and drive here drunk and carrying stuff. That's insane, now I will have a beautiful place I can drink and not have to worry about crack anymore. Probably not even that rich a town, my standards are pretty red neck.
It turns out you can't drink and drive in these rich towns. They really don't take to kindly to narcotics either. You would not believe how fast it takes to get pulled over.
They charged me with felony possession and dwi, bunch of other crap. I had a printout of police tickets that i bought to my lawyer that was literally taller than 6 feet (I'm a little under) when unraveled.
I thought I would lose my job and no longer be employable. I considered suicide, yeah I'll probably avoid prison but what will I do for a living now?
Back track to a few months ago. A good friend of mine was sober for almost a decade. He was sober and got very religious in sobriety. Even though I used for a long time after that he got me to at least believe in God again. When I saw the change in him, something did that! I'm not a church person but he got me thinking about, well how did I get here. Somehow this ability to trust in a power greater than himself got him all this stuff. He went from a transient addict a productive person. Fortunately he had a rare trade skill that was he able to pick back up and he got good breaks and made a lot of money. He got his kids back. He got a bigger, louder bike. A luxury SUV, a nice condo, then a house. A 2nd wife not too much more than half his age.
He relapsed and lost it all again after nearly a decade of really good living. Since I was 16 years old we were good friends through it all. He made another run at sobriety and he had several months clean when we spoke on the phone. 3 days later he relapsed and he was found dead the next morning.
I thought a lot about him jail, this was only a few months prior to my arrest. I never went the hardcore church route but my friend had proven to me what a belief in a higher power could do. I mean what's my purpose in life, what was I created for? I just got back to those basic fundamental ideas. This world doesn't owe me anything. Not a job or a driver's license. So what if I lose all that crap. I looked at all the stuff I do have. I mean how hard is it going to be to find food today. I think I'm owed credit cards and grocery stores. I started to look at every little thing as a gift. My health. There are little kids that will die from cancer and I'm ready to blow myself away over a stupid career or OMG I cant drink. It's like I think I'm owed good health and a decent income!
I guess I was more afraid of where I was heading then never drinking again. My lawyer said the first thing I'm gonna do is go to aa meetings every night and get somebody to sign off that I was there. It did wonders for my case.
I ended up going to 6 meetings a week in the first 90 days. I was able to relate to the literature my first night and even with all the legal chaos over my head i suddenly didn't seem to care. I started living life on life's terms, simply an attitude of whatever happens I'll deal with it. I dumped out the rest of my craft beer that first night. I didn't really have a plan of never drinking again I tried not to think about that concept. I just knew after that first meeting I wasn't drinking tonight. The constant bombardment of meetings early on made not drinking much easier than I thought was possible.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: Christchurch, NZ
Posts: 517
Hi Mikoss
You're in deep my friend.
By the time I was drinking to get through the work day, I didn't know or think it at the time, but I was beyond being able to right my own ship.
I needed rescuing, Eric did too.
It's a matter of putting ourselves in a position to be taught and guided.
By people who have a genuine solution, beyond just stopping drinking and drugging.
You're in deep my friend.
By the time I was drinking to get through the work day, I didn't know or think it at the time, but I was beyond being able to right my own ship.
I needed rescuing, Eric did too.
It's a matter of putting ourselves in a position to be taught and guided.
By people who have a genuine solution, beyond just stopping drinking and drugging.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 353
Thank you so much to everyone for all of the wonderful and caring advice as I appreciate it so much trying to get through this.
So far I was able to get some sleep and no drinking or cocaine.
I can't say I didn't think about just a small drink last night and all through the night as I stayed up all night thinking about it I was able to not drink a drop of alcohol and not a single bit of cocaine. Just eating a lot and drinking water and sleep which I was able to do even without taking an antidepressant.
It will almost be 48 hours without a drink or cocaine and I just hope I can stick to it and never go back to it again ever and hopefully my body can heal from any damage I may have done.
I feel weak and tired and fatigued and sad but my depression has not been horrible like it has been recently as before and after my relapse. Just trying to hang in there and hopefully things get better with my anxiety and depression. And I need to stay away from anyone that will be a negative influence on me to relapse again.
Just hoping I can make it through the day without a drink and make it to 48 hours. This is so hard but I need to do it.
So far I was able to get some sleep and no drinking or cocaine.
I can't say I didn't think about just a small drink last night and all through the night as I stayed up all night thinking about it I was able to not drink a drop of alcohol and not a single bit of cocaine. Just eating a lot and drinking water and sleep which I was able to do even without taking an antidepressant.
It will almost be 48 hours without a drink or cocaine and I just hope I can stick to it and never go back to it again ever and hopefully my body can heal from any damage I may have done.
I feel weak and tired and fatigued and sad but my depression has not been horrible like it has been recently as before and after my relapse. Just trying to hang in there and hopefully things get better with my anxiety and depression. And I need to stay away from anyone that will be a negative influence on me to relapse again.
Just hoping I can make it through the day without a drink and make it to 48 hours. This is so hard but I need to do it.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
If I understand correctly you don't have to go to work. Therefore you can focus 100% of your effort on not drinking or drugging. There is nothing more important in your life right now than staying sober and you have the "freedom" to do it. I wish you the best, that a tough combo to beat.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 353
Thank you so much thomas11, I completely agree with you. At least right now I can focus 100% on getting myself better and recover from these alcohol and cocaine addictions that took control of me in such a horrible way. The alcohol and cocaine use went from being fun and manageable to becoming a bit more on the habitual side but still somewhat manageable but I was becoming dependent on them especially to function at work and then going to a phase of going on binges of absolute addiction and drinking and using too much cocaine. Just absolute self destruction to where I reached that horrible low recently where I decided enough is enough and I need to get better and stop this before I get myself deeper and in a worse situation.
I will admit that recently when I reached a low point I was literally on my bathroom floor crying my eyes out with a bottle of smooth Polish vodka and a small pile of chunks of high purity cocaine on a mirror with a razor blade and a glass filled with vodka drinking sips of straight vodka wanting to call somebody or anybody for help but I couldn't because I had lines of cocaine on my cell phone that I still wanted to finish before I could call anyone. Just sad.
That was just a horrible and terrible situation to be in and I never want to experience that ever again and just hope I never go back to it because it was an absolute low that I hit realizing I was out of control.
I had other incidents similar to that recently before that last incident but that was the real eye opener for me that made me go online and look for help and I found this site and here I am almost going on 3 days with no alcohol and cocaine intake. It has taken every ounce of willpower to not pick up a bottle and pour a drink and do a line or two of cocaine but I don't ever want to go back to that. It is not a way to live. I would not wish it on anybody because it is a horrible addiction that I kept going back to over and over again no matter how many times I said I will quit and I have it under control and I will quit just not today, tomorrow I will quit. Just not today. Just a little more whiskey or vodka or whatever my drink of choice for the moment was and just a little more cocaine and everything will be fine and then I can quit. Just not today. That is what I kept telling myself every time. "I will quit, just not today." As I am sure anyone with any addiction whether it be alcohol or cocaine or whatever the case may be can relate to.
But thankfully I can do it this time and beat this disease of addiction while I still can.
But back to what I was saying before, yes I can now focus 100% on getting better and I am grateful that I am in a position to do it without having to have the stress of work that made my drinking go from bad to worse to absolutely no control. I do want to go back to work in the future but for now I can focus on my health and getting better.
The only that really matters in life is our health and the health of others. That is the most important thing. And the most important asset is time. And hopefully with time we can all heal and get better and grow as individuals and improve our health each day of being sober one day at a time.
I will admit that recently when I reached a low point I was literally on my bathroom floor crying my eyes out with a bottle of smooth Polish vodka and a small pile of chunks of high purity cocaine on a mirror with a razor blade and a glass filled with vodka drinking sips of straight vodka wanting to call somebody or anybody for help but I couldn't because I had lines of cocaine on my cell phone that I still wanted to finish before I could call anyone. Just sad.
That was just a horrible and terrible situation to be in and I never want to experience that ever again and just hope I never go back to it because it was an absolute low that I hit realizing I was out of control.
I had other incidents similar to that recently before that last incident but that was the real eye opener for me that made me go online and look for help and I found this site and here I am almost going on 3 days with no alcohol and cocaine intake. It has taken every ounce of willpower to not pick up a bottle and pour a drink and do a line or two of cocaine but I don't ever want to go back to that. It is not a way to live. I would not wish it on anybody because it is a horrible addiction that I kept going back to over and over again no matter how many times I said I will quit and I have it under control and I will quit just not today, tomorrow I will quit. Just not today. Just a little more whiskey or vodka or whatever my drink of choice for the moment was and just a little more cocaine and everything will be fine and then I can quit. Just not today. That is what I kept telling myself every time. "I will quit, just not today." As I am sure anyone with any addiction whether it be alcohol or cocaine or whatever the case may be can relate to.
But thankfully I can do it this time and beat this disease of addiction while I still can.
But back to what I was saying before, yes I can now focus 100% on getting better and I am grateful that I am in a position to do it without having to have the stress of work that made my drinking go from bad to worse to absolutely no control. I do want to go back to work in the future but for now I can focus on my health and getting better.
The only that really matters in life is our health and the health of others. That is the most important thing. And the most important asset is time. And hopefully with time we can all heal and get better and grow as individuals and improve our health each day of being sober one day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Salt Lake City, UT
Posts: 1,132
Originally Posted by sugarbear1
alcohol + cocaine is a heart attack about to happen (if it already hasn't). I know of people who were told they had had heart attacks and didn't even know it while using cocaine.
An ER physician died when I was working EMS using alcohol and cocaine.
Do what it takes. Stop both.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 353
Thank you HeadEast, yes I am definitely never ever doing those two ever again. I am done with it hopefully for good. Both of them. Together or separately or any way. I want that out of my life.
Because drugs and alcohol can create deadly effects when combined. I forget what cocaine and alcohol produce but I think it is called cocaethylene. A dangerous chemical produced in the liver when drinking alcohol and using cocaine. Just a recipe for disaster. I feel so ashamed and regret every doing these stupid and careless and idiotic things only to feel good and high and escape what I was going through.
I hope I am finally done with those two things for good.
There is a term for mixing drugs and alcohol. It is a specific term. I cannot remember what it is called. Something like exponentiation or a term like that. When 1 +1 does not equal 2 in the case of drugs + alcohol.
But either way I have finally reached day 3 of no alcohol or cocaine or 72 hours of putting either one in my system.
Just eating a lot and drinking fluids and staying on here reading and learning and soaking up as much information and advice and support as I can. Thank you all so much for everything you do and advice you give and stories and suggestions and support. You all are the best !!
Because drugs and alcohol can create deadly effects when combined. I forget what cocaine and alcohol produce but I think it is called cocaethylene. A dangerous chemical produced in the liver when drinking alcohol and using cocaine. Just a recipe for disaster. I feel so ashamed and regret every doing these stupid and careless and idiotic things only to feel good and high and escape what I was going through.
I hope I am finally done with those two things for good.
There is a term for mixing drugs and alcohol. It is a specific term. I cannot remember what it is called. Something like exponentiation or a term like that. When 1 +1 does not equal 2 in the case of drugs + alcohol.
But either way I have finally reached day 3 of no alcohol or cocaine or 72 hours of putting either one in my system.
Just eating a lot and drinking fluids and staying on here reading and learning and soaking up as much information and advice and support as I can. Thank you all so much for everything you do and advice you give and stories and suggestions and support. You all are the best !!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2019
Posts: 2,426
Welcome to SR Mikoss. I'm late to be welcoming you, but you'll find all sorts of support here. Glad you are here with us and on your healthy sober road now. We don't drink or do drugs anymore. I'm about 3 months sober and I cannot tell you how quiet and calm my mind is. I treasure every moment of that. In these early days you might experience what others often describe as boredom, but take a look at feelings like that before you settle on any labels. It could be just peace and calm rather than boredom and our nag-headed heads aren't used to peace and quiet and calm. I'm so happy you are here.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2020
Posts: 353
Thank you so much.
Just having a hard day. I couldn't sleep much last night until very late and had very strange dreams before waking up.
Then I woke up with very bad depression and anxiety and feeling sick.
But I am starting to feel a little bit better and I am almost at 4 days sober.
Just having a hard day. I couldn't sleep much last night until very late and had very strange dreams before waking up.
Then I woke up with very bad depression and anxiety and feeling sick.
But I am starting to feel a little bit better and I am almost at 4 days sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,097
Hi mikoss
Day 4 is a great achievement from where you were at - congratulations!
From my very recent experience, the 'yuck' physical withdrawal symptoms started getting more tolerable on day 4, and by day 7, they were pretty much gone - just the mental anxiety, fuzzy head, little sleep and over-active emotions remained. I am up to day 13 now, and each day gets better. Cravings are going to stick around for longer, so I use SR to distract me and release those thoughts to this supportive family. Hope you continue to do the same!
Thoughts are with you - stay soberly strong!
Day 4 is a great achievement from where you were at - congratulations!
From my very recent experience, the 'yuck' physical withdrawal symptoms started getting more tolerable on day 4, and by day 7, they were pretty much gone - just the mental anxiety, fuzzy head, little sleep and over-active emotions remained. I am up to day 13 now, and each day gets better. Cravings are going to stick around for longer, so I use SR to distract me and release those thoughts to this supportive family. Hope you continue to do the same!
Thoughts are with you - stay soberly strong!
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