How do you remind yourself that alcohol won't help.
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Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Nsw
Posts: 408
How do you remind yourself that alcohol won't help.
As time passed since the last time we drink the memories of why we quit become more distant. How do you all keep the truth at the forefront of your memories?
Get a couple of pieces of paper and on one write down all the examples and times in the past when a drink helped, I mean really helped to make the situation better. Then on the other write down all the examples and times it didn’t help, didn’t change things for the better.
For me I would have one blank page and one very full one which would tell me all I needed to know. x
For me I would have one blank page and one very full one which would tell me all I needed to know. x
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Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 259
What i do is to remind myself of what happens after the party ends and Im still drinking by myself. If I think about my time at a bar I do remember the bar experience as being fun but then I have to remember that I went home and continued drinking way beyond any of my control or desire, woke up feeling very bad with a lot of pieces to pick up due to my drinking.
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 652
I don't have much to add to this, Finalcall.
If I hang onto anything it is the 3am self-loathing. No big dramas or rock bottom stories here but waking up with the 3am self-loathing was the pits and I am glad that I don't ever have to do that again. Sometimes it is more situational. Right now I am visiting family overseas. There have been moments when I have felt a little tempted and then I remind myself that last time I was in this situation I did drink, lost my off button for pretty much the duration and felt very ashamed of myself after.
Mainly though I just do as Doggonecarl and remind myself that I am not a drinker. That is enough.
Are you okay there today Finalcall?
If I hang onto anything it is the 3am self-loathing. No big dramas or rock bottom stories here but waking up with the 3am self-loathing was the pits and I am glad that I don't ever have to do that again. Sometimes it is more situational. Right now I am visiting family overseas. There have been moments when I have felt a little tempted and then I remind myself that last time I was in this situation I did drink, lost my off button for pretty much the duration and felt very ashamed of myself after.
Mainly though I just do as Doggonecarl and remind myself that I am not a drinker. That is enough.
Are you okay there today Finalcall?
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 732
For me I tell myself what's the point? Because one drink/one binge to make myself feel 'better' or whatever is never enough, it would make any cravings a million times worse for a long time, IF I managed to ever stop...
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
I've never really "clicked" with the methods of writing down cons or such. It seems like "negative reinforcement" to me- I prefer the learned habit of "I get to [ ]" v any version of "can't" or what happened when I drank. It's just much more positive, and reflective of the now as Carl said.
Also, nothing good happened in the end so (paging least!) being grateful for even the most banal things in my life keeps me in that now and the freedom and hope of my present life.
A quick out loud list of 5 things I am grateful for helps me when agitated in traffic, in some kinda mood at home, irrationally irritated by something stupid...or just having a good morning and needing an extra plus!
Oh! (and this in an after thought and edit) I should remember to turn to others who still struggle with consequences and the madness of their ongoing drinking. If I can help in some way, that's plenty to remind me of why I don't and won't drink again.
For me, spending time here on SR daily is a great reminder. Just like any recovery community, you will find people in every possible stage of recovery - from still actively drinking to many decades sober, and every point in-between. I learn something new every day that makes me think about not only my past, but what I can do today to help myself.
For me, when I'm needing a reminder, I hit up a meeting. It never fails to remind me why I got sober, and it gives me the opportunity to reinforce the IRL connections I have made with other recovering people. Pretty much every meeting I go to, there's someone telling a story I relate to, that reminds me of my own past. And at the same time, I hear the positive stories of peoples' successes. I try to share something positive when I speak at meetings. Sometimes it's a challenge, but it does get me thinking of all that I have to be grateful for. And helping someone else to see the good things that happen in recovery is the best thing I have found to shore up my own recovery, at 5 years in.
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Join Date: Sep 2017
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