Hello, first post
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Originally Posted by totfit 
Welcome Lucinda! Alcohol may be a bit more difficult as "society" with the help of advertising considers it a fairly innocuous substance. This however is not the reality. The reality is that it can cause damage except for those that drink within the limits or bounds of what is considered "moderate" drinking.
For some of us, either from birth or developing with time, alcohol affects us differently and we have a "craving" for it as it begins to leave our system. It is this "craving" that separates us from those that can drink normally.
You no doubt understand that abstinence is the most effective way to deal with Heroin and Crack Cocaine. It is really no different at all with Alcohol. The effects of alcohol can be at least as devastating to those of us that experience this phenomena of craving. I have found that this just gets worse over time when I have added alcohol, but seems to progress and is just waiting till I drink again, even during long periods of sobriety. I think other's experiences show this to be true also.
There is no shame in reaching out. I found that with a select group, the more open I became, the more freeing it was and the better I was able to grasp and resolve issues at hand, especially this one. Glad you piped in. I am not in the lower end of "craving" as mine would be pretty advanced. From what I have seen though, the "trying moderation" thing for most that have crossed the line at the very least more trouble than it is worth. Abstinence is just easier.
For some of us, either from birth or developing with time, alcohol affects us differently and we have a "craving" for it as it begins to leave our system. It is this "craving" that separates us from those that can drink normally.
You no doubt understand that abstinence is the most effective way to deal with Heroin and Crack Cocaine. It is really no different at all with Alcohol. The effects of alcohol can be at least as devastating to those of us that experience this phenomena of craving. I have found that this just gets worse over time when I have added alcohol, but seems to progress and is just waiting till I drink again, even during long periods of sobriety. I think other's experiences show this to be true also.
There is no shame in reaching out. I found that with a select group, the more open I became, the more freeing it was and the better I was able to grasp and resolve issues at hand, especially this one. Glad you piped in. I am not in the lower end of "craving" as mine would be pretty advanced. From what I have seen though, the "trying moderation" thing for most that have crossed the line at the very least more trouble than it is worth. Abstinence is just easier.
It is a funny one with alcohol and society. I see folk look pretty disappointed when I say 'I am not drinking tonight'. I didn't get that reaction off anyone when I quit heroin.
Yes, craving - that sums up the change really. Up until a couple of years ago, I didn't experience cravings. I had gone along for a number of years being able to take it or leave it with alcohol. But that has changed now, and I crave alcohol when not drinking it. I do things about my cravings, I go swimming, get to the gym, go to an exercise class and get through them but it is a miserable way to live. Sometimes I don't do anything about my cravings and I just drink. I set up situations to make that seem normal too - ie., sunny evening, lets take dog out to the pub for grub and a pint.
I quit drinking for 4 months last year and was just coming out the other side of cravings when I decided it was ok to start drinking again. Boom! Cravings back even bigger than before.
Yeah, the abstinence I know you are right. I think I have got to the point where I am going to need help achieving that this time around.
Last edited by Lucinda2; 07-05-2019 at 03:56 AM. Reason: typo
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Originally Posted by Ghostlight1
Hello, Lucinda. And welcome. I'm glad you posted and to have you here.
Congratulations on beating your drug addiction.
You'll find all sorts of different kinds of drinkers here, so I hope someone can relate.
I was an every day falling down drunk who had lost all control of drinking (and myself).
I hope you find some help here and stick around.
Best to you.
Congratulations on beating your drug addiction.
You'll find all sorts of different kinds of drinkers here, so I hope someone can relate.
I was an every day falling down drunk who had lost all control of drinking (and myself).
I hope you find some help here and stick around.
Best to you.
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Originally Posted by Katlyne
Hi, Lucinda! It is good that you can recognize the problem. I, too, am an ex addict. I was addicted to meth and used daily for 12 years. I quit over 6 1/2 years ago qnd changed my life. I never gave up alcohol and never intended too. At some point, it changed for me, too. I am not a daily drinker either...and can quit fairly easy after a hangover but i have alot of trouble staying quit. When i do drink i always drink way too much. Once I start, i just cant seem to stop. I started noticing something had changed about 4 years ago, i think. And for the last couple of years or so i started trying to quit...only recently i have been putting any effort in it though. This is a great site with lots of supportive people and lots of good advice. Its nice to meet you!
Thank you Katlyne. This all sounds familiar. I appreciate your welcome.
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Hi Lucinda, you're right to be worried about the cravings. My situation was similar to yours; I am middle class, middle aged and a late developer in the drinking stakes. No-one thought I had a problem either, but I live alone and I was drinking a bottle of wine a night. I often craved wine and started staying home in the evening just so I could drink.
In the end I found moderation too difficult and found it was easier to give up drinking altogether. Much more relaxing to remove it as an option. I developed alternative ways of relaxing involving a nice cup of tea when I got home from work.
Not drinking is much healthier and removes all sorts of health risk factors.
In the end I found moderation too difficult and found it was easier to give up drinking altogether. Much more relaxing to remove it as an option. I developed alternative ways of relaxing involving a nice cup of tea when I got home from work.
Not drinking is much healthier and removes all sorts of health risk factors.
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Originally Posted by Anna
Welcome, Lucinda,
It's good that you recognize you have a problem before it becomes unmanageable. Since you are concerned, do you think you are ready to stop drinking? If so, you will find lots of support here. I am not an AA person, but I'm not sure that people at meetings would undermine what you have accomplished. And, as you know there are many paths to sobriety.
I'm glad you found us.
It's good that you recognize you have a problem before it becomes unmanageable. Since you are concerned, do you think you are ready to stop drinking? If so, you will find lots of support here. I am not an AA person, but I'm not sure that people at meetings would undermine what you have accomplished. And, as you know there are many paths to sobriety.
I'm glad you found us. Member
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Originally Posted by FeelingGreat
Hi Lucinda, you're right to be worried about the cravings. My situation was similar to yours; I am middle class, middle aged and a late developer in the drinking stakes. No-one thought I had a problem either, but I live alone and I was drinking a bottle of wine a night. I often craved wine and started staying home in the evening just so I could drink.
In the end I found moderation too difficult and found it was easier to give up drinking altogether. Much more relaxing to remove it as an option. I developed alternative ways of relaxing involving a nice cup of tea when I got home from work.
Not drinking is much healthier and removes all sorts of health risk factors.
In the end I found moderation too difficult and found it was easier to give up drinking altogether. Much more relaxing to remove it as an option. I developed alternative ways of relaxing involving a nice cup of tea when I got home from work.
Not drinking is much healthier and removes all sorts of health risk factors.
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Originally Posted by ImNotThatGuy
Hey Lucinda, welcome. A lot of us can relate to the feeling of losing control, I think. It's a sneaky addiction and the social acceptability of it doesn't make it any easier to kick. That you recognize it before it wrecks your life (and it will if you're an alcoholic) is a huge blessing.
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Originally Posted by Numblady
Welcome. You seem to have a really good understanding of where you are, and that is pretty impressive. I hope you will stick around. I was similar to you in that no one thought I had an issue ... but it felt like an issue to me. The preoccupation and for me planning (daily drinker) just took too much mental energy and thanks to this place I hit a year and a half today.
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Originally Posted by Ayers
Welcome Lucinda. I hope you will find this place as helpful as I have.
I too was someone who no one would have thought had a drinking problem - until they did. My family "found out". And the sad thing is, I knew , months and months before then that I had to do something. I knew I had a problem. But kept postponing .
So wonderful that you are making this decision now and not later. You will be amazed at the " I knowwww's..." and "me toooo's..." you'll get here. I am not an AA member, and managed to stay sober now for 10 months with only SR as help.
Just stay connected - you can do this. You don't have to go it alone.
I too was someone who no one would have thought had a drinking problem - until they did. My family "found out". And the sad thing is, I knew , months and months before then that I had to do something. I knew I had a problem. But kept postponing .
So wonderful that you are making this decision now and not later. You will be amazed at the " I knowwww's..." and "me toooo's..." you'll get here. I am not an AA member, and managed to stay sober now for 10 months with only SR as help.
Just stay connected - you can do this. You don't have to go it alone.
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