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Day 17 huge trigger

Old 10-05-2018, 02:30 PM
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Day 17 huge trigger

I’ve been doing great. AA almost everyday, I have a sponsor and have been feeling gratitude and pretty strong. I’ve canceled a trip to Vegas, told most of my friends, been extremely cautious going to stores (anxiety because of the alcohol). I’ve been pretty on top of triggers ect.
I’ve been watching a family members dog for awhile while they were out of town. They came to pick the pup up, and gifted me bottles of vodka and rum from their trip. I froze. I was so not expecting that, which I should have, as we are big drinking buddies, whom I haven’t told yet that I have quit.

Man my alcoholic voice had a field day with this.... “Just give it to the hubby he can put it in his safe” “just hide it for a rainy day, you can’t waste alcohol” “you won’t drink it, just put it in the cabinet for guests” “don’t waste it!!” man it tried to convince me to keep it. I ended up smashing the bottles and throwing them away. Even when I thought to just throw them in the garbage i swear the voice said I could fish them out later if I needed too. Well what a day. Felt like I got hit by a bus after that ordeal. Next step tell EVERYONE in my life I have quit.
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Old 10-05-2018, 03:07 PM
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Well done getting rid of that poison. 😀
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Old 10-05-2018, 03:22 PM
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Good job Kiki... I use to throw my Captian Morgan bottles, ( half-full) into our pool. I have been clean for almost 9 months. You can do it !
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Old 10-05-2018, 03:37 PM
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Way to go! Pouring booze out was therapeutic for me the couple of times I did it. AV kicking and screaming not to up until the point it's going down the drain then it's suddenly powerless again. I like showing my AV it's powerless.
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Old 10-05-2018, 04:29 PM
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I'm glad you disposed of them Kiki
congrats on day 17

D
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Old 10-05-2018, 05:40 PM
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Great job- surprises like that are terrible! Sounds like you have a good plan started- keep going! Definitely a story for your sponsor or something that might pop into your head in a meeting one day
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Old 10-05-2018, 05:48 PM
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Glad you got rid of it.
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Old 10-05-2018, 06:24 PM
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Tough choice but it is the correct one. Eventually they get easier. Today I celebrate 5 months to the day of my last drink. There have been easy times and hard times,but it all came down to the choices I made. I do not want the hangover nor the guilt of having that drink my AV thinks I need.
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Old 10-05-2018, 06:34 PM
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Grats Kiki and Marcutah, for real. I've only been on this site for a couple of days, but I am floored at the levels of authenticity and desire to be clean by all.
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Old 10-05-2018, 06:45 PM
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Something about broken glass and determination can be quite propelling in carrying us forward to what we do want in our lives!!!

Congrats on your recovery. One day at a time. Woohoo!
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Old 10-05-2018, 08:15 PM
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Originally Posted by Mango212 View Post
Something about broken glass and determination can be quite propelling in carrying us forward to what we do want in our lives!!!

Congrats on your recovery. One day at a time. Woohoo!
Thank you! Smashing them was very cathortic, and i knew there would be no way to retrieve them from the trash after that. I did put them in a disposable aluminum pan first then went to town. It seriously made me feel better!
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