I came close, but lost the battle. The worst has happened.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
Thank you all for the encouraging words. It really means a lot, and I am not just saying that, it means a lot. Those of you who said I was in shock, are correct.
I had been like that since I got back from the hospital, they gave me a ton of pain medication, but I didn't get it filled. I have been so mad at myself for doing this. It has been hard to eat or sleep since this happened, but I am finding that I am winding down some and it may be because the adrenaline levels can only stay so high for so long.
I had been able to only nod off for minutes at a time, but I am sleeping a little better. I wake up and for a few seconds, everything seems normal, then reality sets in again and I realize once again the magnitude of what I have done.
There are two reasons I came here, one was to get the encouragement from people who know where I am coming from and where I have been, and secondly, I hope anyone sitting on the fence, will see this and see that NOTHING about alcohol is good. It can happen in an instant, and there is no taking it away.
Part of the anxiety in all of this is knowing they are coming after me, but I don't know when. I am not a fugitive or anything, but they are going to issue a warrant for my arrest, once the crash investigation is complete.
Thanks for the concern everyone, I appreciate it.
Still have found nothing about the other people involved. I have looked everywhere and asked everyone. Honestly, I could be just seeing things not there at this point, but it worries me no one has said "they are ok"
I had been like that since I got back from the hospital, they gave me a ton of pain medication, but I didn't get it filled. I have been so mad at myself for doing this. It has been hard to eat or sleep since this happened, but I am finding that I am winding down some and it may be because the adrenaline levels can only stay so high for so long.
I had been able to only nod off for minutes at a time, but I am sleeping a little better. I wake up and for a few seconds, everything seems normal, then reality sets in again and I realize once again the magnitude of what I have done.
There are two reasons I came here, one was to get the encouragement from people who know where I am coming from and where I have been, and secondly, I hope anyone sitting on the fence, will see this and see that NOTHING about alcohol is good. It can happen in an instant, and there is no taking it away.
Part of the anxiety in all of this is knowing they are coming after me, but I don't know when. I am not a fugitive or anything, but they are going to issue a warrant for my arrest, once the crash investigation is complete.
Thanks for the concern everyone, I appreciate it.
Still have found nothing about the other people involved. I have looked everywhere and asked everyone. Honestly, I could be just seeing things not there at this point, but it worries me no one has said "they are ok"
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
Originally Posted by Meraviglioso 
How are you doing Rich? I have been thinking about you all day.
I hope you get some additional information soon on the condition of the people you hit as well as the timeline and an outline of what lies ahead for you legally. Just knowing what direction things are headed is grounding.
All of those things are out of your hands for now though. The one thing you can do something about is your sobriety. How is that going?
I hope you get some additional information soon on the condition of the people you hit as well as the timeline and an outline of what lies ahead for you legally. Just knowing what direction things are headed is grounding.
All of those things are out of your hands for now though. The one thing you can do something about is your sobriety. How is that going?
Administrator
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,512
I am glad that you are starting to feel a little bit better. And, I can imagine that the not knowing when the arrest warrant will come and not knowing what happened to the other person, would be so difficult.
I'm glad you checked in and I hope that you can get some rest.
I'm glad you checked in and I hope that you can get some rest.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 543
Originally Posted by rich624
secondly, I hope anyone sitting on the fence, will see this and see that NOTHING about alcohol is good. It can happen in an instant, and there is no taking it away.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,339
Rich
A couple years ago I was at a friends house drinking wine and I had driven my children there separately from my boyfriend . We were all having such a great time, I didn’t notice that everyone else had switched to water about an hour before it was time to leave. I just kept drinking wine .
Before I knew it, it was 11 PM and the host and hostess were yawning. ‘ Oh no, I have to go. I’m past my welcome! ‘ I could feel my words slurring. My boyfriend asked, “are you OK to drive?“ And I said “of course! I am fine!“
So he pulled out a breathalyzer and I blew .18
He shamed me in front of the host and hostess, saying how could I think I could drive my children and possibly lose my nursing license and my drivers license and kill me and my kids and possibly somebody else?
I couldn’t answer him then.... I could answer him now. Because I am addicted to alcohol.
Needless to say I sat there for an hour and a half, pounding down water and keeping the hostess up way past her bedtime, until my alcohol limit was .07, the legal limit for a driver in the United States .
I’m well aware I could be in your shoes. I’m sorry.
We are all on the same page here.
Never again. NEVER. N E V E R.
Hugs to you
A couple years ago I was at a friends house drinking wine and I had driven my children there separately from my boyfriend . We were all having such a great time, I didn’t notice that everyone else had switched to water about an hour before it was time to leave. I just kept drinking wine .
Before I knew it, it was 11 PM and the host and hostess were yawning. ‘ Oh no, I have to go. I’m past my welcome! ‘ I could feel my words slurring. My boyfriend asked, “are you OK to drive?“ And I said “of course! I am fine!“
So he pulled out a breathalyzer and I blew .18
He shamed me in front of the host and hostess, saying how could I think I could drive my children and possibly lose my nursing license and my drivers license and kill me and my kids and possibly somebody else?
I couldn’t answer him then.... I could answer him now. Because I am addicted to alcohol.
Needless to say I sat there for an hour and a half, pounding down water and keeping the hostess up way past her bedtime, until my alcohol limit was .07, the legal limit for a driver in the United States .
I’m well aware I could be in your shoes. I’m sorry.
We are all on the same page here.
Never again. NEVER. N E V E R.
Hugs to you
Member
Join Date: Mar 2018
Posts: 154
Originally Posted by TeeJayVerm
Mission accomplished! Thanks! I had the flashback "what if" moment when you posted this. Specifically, "what if I hadn't seen that person crossing a dark street" when I drove impaired one time. Reading this story as it unfolds really made me pause and think. Thanks again and best of luck to you.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
The story just keeps getting worse.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
Rich,
LessG and I are both lawyers.
It sounds to me like you either don't have a lawyer or s/he is not good or you are not communicating with them enough. Get a good one specialized in this exact problem. Do the research as to who is good. Spend the money. I am originally from Florida -- where are you located?
Do not let your guilt, which is well placed, stop you from acting to do the best to minimize the damage to you. You are still worth saving. We all are.
You seem like you are letting the fear and guilt paralyze you but now is not the time for that. You need to get in front of this. Now. An arrest warrant is not a conviction, there is still a lot of room for a good lawyer to maneuver.
Yes, su$ks. For everyone. But you have decided to stop drinking, which is the important thing.
Now use the rest of your sober life to do good. Like any of us, I did something similarly stupid once. No-one was hurt, thank God. But it was the slap in the face I needed.
Dont drink ever.
LessG and I are both lawyers.
It sounds to me like you either don't have a lawyer or s/he is not good or you are not communicating with them enough. Get a good one specialized in this exact problem. Do the research as to who is good. Spend the money. I am originally from Florida -- where are you located?
Do not let your guilt, which is well placed, stop you from acting to do the best to minimize the damage to you. You are still worth saving. We all are.
You seem like you are letting the fear and guilt paralyze you but now is not the time for that. You need to get in front of this. Now. An arrest warrant is not a conviction, there is still a lot of room for a good lawyer to maneuver.
Yes, su$ks. For everyone. But you have decided to stop drinking, which is the important thing.
Now use the rest of your sober life to do good. Like any of us, I did something similarly stupid once. No-one was hurt, thank God. But it was the slap in the face I needed.
Dont drink ever.
Life is good
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4,036
Do not let your guilt, which is well placed, stop you from acting to do the best to minimize the damage to you. You are still worth saving. We all are.
Thank for these words, Dropsie.
Rich,
Fear feeds more fear. Gratitude lists are powerful and can help. It may take time, yet repeatedly writing gratitude lists can make for big changes.
I am grateful you are here. I'm grateful you're alive.
Prayers for those injured. I'm grateful they are alive.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 543
Originally Posted by Dee74
I'm really sorry.
I'm not really familiar with the US system, but hopefully your lawyer will be able to successfully argue that a maximum security facility is not appropriate for you,
D
I'm not really familiar with the US system, but hopefully your lawyer will be able to successfully argue that a maximum security facility is not appropriate for you,
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 3,163
Rich,
I am sorry, I now see you have retained a laywer, but if so, why dont you know the aswers about the victims? How did you find the lawyer? Does s/he strike you are great, cause s/he should be. You have some important decisions to make about how you hande this legally, make sure he is the right partner for that process. What is his experience, success rate and what he is going to do for you? Is he conncected? any chance of having the charge redued etc etc?
Re fees, as you know, money is the least of your problems right now. Not unusual that there is not a fixed fee to the end of the case, but you should know his hourly rate, a range of fees -- in the end price alone should not drive this, but he should be upfront about fees and fee ranges.
Bottom line is -- (1) why dont you know the condition of the others involved? (2) is he trying to actively negotiate a lesser charge? (3) is he connected? (4) how are you going to communicate with him and when to build a strategy? (5) is there anything to fight (there often is) or is it better to place nice??
Your lawyer may be great, probabaly is, but these are all crucial questions.
You also need to totally lose the self pity, the judge will see this a mile away. I know its hard, you will lose a lot, but it could have been so much worse and in the end, your life could be so much better than if this had never happened.
Where ever you are, its where you need to be. Even when it totally stinks! I believe that now.
Feel free to PM me.
I am sorry, I now see you have retained a laywer, but if so, why dont you know the aswers about the victims? How did you find the lawyer? Does s/he strike you are great, cause s/he should be. You have some important decisions to make about how you hande this legally, make sure he is the right partner for that process. What is his experience, success rate and what he is going to do for you? Is he conncected? any chance of having the charge redued etc etc?
Re fees, as you know, money is the least of your problems right now. Not unusual that there is not a fixed fee to the end of the case, but you should know his hourly rate, a range of fees -- in the end price alone should not drive this, but he should be upfront about fees and fee ranges.
Bottom line is -- (1) why dont you know the condition of the others involved? (2) is he trying to actively negotiate a lesser charge? (3) is he connected? (4) how are you going to communicate with him and when to build a strategy? (5) is there anything to fight (there often is) or is it better to place nice??
Your lawyer may be great, probabaly is, but these are all crucial questions.
You also need to totally lose the self pity, the judge will see this a mile away. I know its hard, you will lose a lot, but it could have been so much worse and in the end, your life could be so much better than if this had never happened.
Where ever you are, its where you need to be. Even when it totally stinks! I believe that now.
Feel free to PM me.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: NOLA
Posts: 7
Originally Posted by rich624
The story just keeps getting worse.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
Stop, breathe, try to relax, and get a lawyer that specializes in DUI's or criminal defense. No price will be too high. Odds are with a good lawyer you will get to plead to a lesser charge. Unfortunately, from what you say, you meet all the elements of DUI-serious bodily harm.
**Thus, we turn to the elements of the crime of driving under the influence causing serious bodily injury. The elements are met if: (1) a person driving or in actual physical control of a vehicle, (2) who was under the influence of alcoholic beverages to the extent that the person's normal faculties are impaired or has a blood or breath alcohol level of .08 or more, (3) causes or contributes to causing serious bodily injury to another person as a result of operating the vehicle.Esler v. State, 915 So.2d 637, 640 (Fla. 2d DCA 2005); Fla. Std. Jury Instr. (Crim.) 28.3 (2010); §§ 316.193(1) and 316.193(3)(a), (3)(b), (3)(c) 2., Fla. Stat. (2010)
Get a good lawyer and you might still serve jail time but it won't be four years in a max facility. Prosecutors aren't sadists; they will realize you aren't a violent threat and just a dumb drunk. Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 268
Very frightening situation..can't say how many times I've driven drunk...by the standard of law... with an exception of a few weeks here and there...almost every day for the last ten years. Been caught twice. Both for a seat belt check. Usually I just disregard the thoughts that come up in my head...what if I had an accident...what if I hurt someone....your experience has definitely caused me pause to think...thank you..
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 5,937
I'm sorry that you're facing this Rich. The advice you're getting is crucial- you really need a good lawyer. You did something terrible and someone was badly hurt. But that doesn't mean you don't deserve good counsel. Cases like this are very often plead out to reduced charges. You really need a good lawyer to keep this from making things even worse than they already are.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,912
Originally Posted by rich624
The story just keeps getting worse.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
I am going to be charged with felony DUI with severe bodily injury. This is classified as a violent crime by the Florida Department of Corrections, which means I will be housed with the worst criminals in the Florida prison system.
I just can't believe this. I am not a criminal, how am I going to deal with this?
I just cannot believe that my life has been so totally and completely destroyed like this.
I was hoping for a minimum security classification, but there is no way now.
I had to admit to myself that I was a criminal when I got a DUI several years ago. Thankfully, I did not harm anyone, so I wasn't facing any real jail time, but it was very traumatic for me since I had previously never ever been in trouble with the law.
I truly hope your consequences aren't as drastic as what you fear they will be, but that will probably somewhat depend on the severity of the injuries to the other party. I remember when I was waiting to see the judge to set bail at the police station the morning after my arrest, one of the guys who was also waiting was told by the judge that he had killed two people the night before while driving drunk. The guy didn't remember a thing about the accident. I cannot imagine the horror of waking up in jail and finding out you killed two people.
I know you are scared to death, but you will get through this. It will definitely cost a lot of money and take a lot of time, but you will get through it. I will keep you and the injured party in my prayers.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
