I came close, but lost the battle. The worst has happened.
Blue Belt
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Soberville, USA
Posts: 4,174
Rich,
Prayers.
Imo..you have the right mindset. Move forward. 4 or 5 years is not as long as it could have been.
My addiction is from years of alcohol abuse as a youngster until I was 50. The crave is for life. We addicts have brain damage that makes us want to get high.
It is ridiculous really. Why would I want to escape reality. We only have a short time on this planet, why not be present for as much of it as I can.
Your story has helped me strengthen my stance to never ever drink again.
Prayers.
Imo..you have the right mindset. Move forward. 4 or 5 years is not as long as it could have been.
My addiction is from years of alcohol abuse as a youngster until I was 50. The crave is for life. We addicts have brain damage that makes us want to get high.
It is ridiculous really. Why would I want to escape reality. We only have a short time on this planet, why not be present for as much of it as I can.
Your story has helped me strengthen my stance to never ever drink again.
RIP Sweet Suki
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: In my sanctuary, my home
Posts: 39,913
You have been asked but never answered...Do you have an attorney? If not, get one now! They can find information on the person you hit and how they are doing. I know you are in shock and I know you are scared, but this didn't just happen to you, it happened to someone else who could very well lose just as much as you fear you will.
Get an attorney and get to an AA meeting and keep going. You cannot change what happened, but the most important thing is to start taking the right steps from here on out.
Get an attorney and get to an AA meeting and keep going. You cannot change what happened, but the most important thing is to start taking the right steps from here on out.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
I was in the hospital overnight. I don't really know what happened to the other people but I asked the police if anyone else got hurt and they said "yes".
I am guessing they were hurt worse than me because I was in a truck and they were in a smaller sedan. My truck looks totaled and it was head on. I am speculating their injuries are worse than mine, and mine would be considered "severe bodily injury" in a DUI.
I retained an attorney today and I am already having second thoughts. He gave me a price for the first half of the process, the arraignment, but wouldn't tell me how much after that. My guess is leaving it open ended was bad for me.
I am going to press him on it tomorrow .
I am guessing they were hurt worse than me because I was in a truck and they were in a smaller sedan. My truck looks totaled and it was head on. I am speculating their injuries are worse than mine, and mine would be considered "severe bodily injury" in a DUI.
I retained an attorney today and I am already having second thoughts. He gave me a price for the first half of the process, the arraignment, but wouldn't tell me how much after that. My guess is leaving it open ended was bad for me.
I am going to press him on it tomorrow .
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Big City
Posts: 3,895
Originally Posted by rich624 
I was in the hospital overnight. I don't really know what happened to the other people but I asked the police if anyone else got hurt and they said "yes"
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
So sorry to hear about this tragedy that you and others are going through, alcohol will take all that you have, and come back for more of you. But, you will get through this...
If it were me, I would check into a 30 day treatment center immediately. They can help you get a handle on your emotions, and you will be surrounded by others who are also struggling.
This will be good for you in many ways, including showing the courts that you know you have a problem, and are taking immediate steps to get help. I would seek help now.
Sending you healing thoughts...WF
If it were me, I would check into a 30 day treatment center immediately. They can help you get a handle on your emotions, and you will be surrounded by others who are also struggling.
This will be good for you in many ways, including showing the courts that you know you have a problem, and are taking immediate steps to get help. I would seek help now.
Sending you healing thoughts...WF
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
What makes me so mad about this is if I had found the outpatient addiction place, just right down the road from my house, I could have made the two months. I could have done it and it would have given me a good start.
I guess none of that matters now. All of my plans are gone. I was going to retire a little early. I suppose I could move to San Francisco, they treat the homeless pretty well there.
Wildflower, I have entered an outpatient facility that will allow me to still work. Three nights a week with testing and therapy. Not as good as full time, but it is better than nothing.
I guess none of that matters now. All of my plans are gone. I was going to retire a little early. I suppose I could move to San Francisco, they treat the homeless pretty well there.
Wildflower, I have entered an outpatient facility that will allow me to still work. Three nights a week with testing and therapy. Not as good as full time, but it is better than nothing.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
Maybe worrying about what happens "after the punishment" is a little non-productive now?
Think of what steps you can do now to improve the current situation...
Does your work know? Family?
BTW..San Francisco is plum full of homeless...you don't want to be there.
In my 2 DUI's, my attorney charged a specific amount for the preliminary stuff also, it's left open ended because they don't know if you will take a plea bargain or go to trial.
I know this is hard...so hard...but treatment will improve your current scenario...
Think of what steps you can do now to improve the current situation...
Does your work know? Family?
BTW..San Francisco is plum full of homeless...you don't want to be there.
In my 2 DUI's, my attorney charged a specific amount for the preliminary stuff also, it's left open ended because they don't know if you will take a plea bargain or go to trial.
I know this is hard...so hard...but treatment will improve your current scenario...
Life is good
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 4,036
Originally Posted by rich624
It might be a new beginning, but I am 59 years old, and was doing ok for retirement.
No more, I am going to be wiped out, and probably lose my home.
I will never get another job in IT as long as I live.
This will destroy my Social Security, because I will be making 0.00 for the four years.
No more, I am going to be wiped out, and probably lose my home.
I will never get another job in IT as long as I live.
This will destroy my Social Security, because I will be making 0.00 for the four years.
Selfish, woe-is-me thinking mired me in the muck. 12 step meetings and weekend get-aways is where I heard amazing, wonderful stories of losing more than could be imagined to come back stronger and healthier in all ways, including financially.
God/Higher Power kind of healing and recovery. Hang in there. Furure tripping won't help. Take this one day at a time.
Seriously, checking out AA again could be a good thing, in addition to the treatment program. Praying for God's guidance, asking for eyes to see, ears to hear and a sponsor to help me made a big difference in my life. Take what you like and leave the rest.
Prayers of healing, strength and recovery for you and whoever was injured.
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,044
I'm glad that you came here to post your story, not only for the help you'll get here, but for those who'll read it.
Terrifying as it sounds, the best thing that I can think of is, stay where you are, stick with the outpatient treatment you've started, don't drink, and live with all the consequences of your actions. I don't judge you, because drunk driving is something many of us have done, but you have to pay.
I'm sorry about these troubles, for you and the victims.
Terrifying as it sounds, the best thing that I can think of is, stay where you are, stick with the outpatient treatment you've started, don't drink, and live with all the consequences of your actions. I don't judge you, because drunk driving is something many of us have done, but you have to pay.
I'm sorry about these troubles, for you and the victims.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
While this is very overwhelming and scary, and will wipe me out, I have been thinking because of my age, background and relatively clean record, I would most likely be a minimum security prisoner (hoping and praying), which would allow me to work, and possibly even teach.
I could teach IT and networking. I have seen some prisons with an IT curriculum, but it would depend on where I get sent.
I could teach IT and networking. I have seen some prisons with an IT curriculum, but it would depend on where I get sent.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
Has anyone here ever gotten, or know someone who has gotten a felony DUI with severe bodily harm?
How did they make it through?
I will have to do the prison stint, then after that, my license will be suspended for three years after I get out.
I don't think I will ever be able to drive again because I won't be able to afford the insurance.
How do people do it?
How did they make it through?
I will have to do the prison stint, then after that, my license will be suspended for three years after I get out.
I don't think I will ever be able to drive again because I won't be able to afford the insurance.
How do people do it?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: California
Posts: 13,044
I'm sorry this happened, and I really hope the other person is okay. Lots of great advice above. I'm glad you have a lawyer, I would let him handle any talking, and finding out about how the others involved in the accident are doing.
You cannot change what happened, and you seem to have a pretty good idea on the result in the short term, it will be very difficult, but your life is not over. I'm glad you're in rehab, hopefully this will help you stay sober, and also try to stay focused in the present. Do you have friends/family who can be with you right now to help you? Is it possible to place your house in a trust? Talk to the lawyer, and see if he can help you with some of the financial as well as legal decisions.
I will pray everyone involved is okay, and healing.
You cannot change what happened, and you seem to have a pretty good idea on the result in the short term, it will be very difficult, but your life is not over. I'm glad you're in rehab, hopefully this will help you stay sober, and also try to stay focused in the present. Do you have friends/family who can be with you right now to help you? Is it possible to place your house in a trust? Talk to the lawyer, and see if he can help you with some of the financial as well as legal decisions.
I will pray everyone involved is okay, and healing.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
was in the hospital overnight. That night, the cop came in and told me they were going to charge me with DUI, but did not make an arrest or charge me at that time. A lawyer told me they had to subpoena the blood taken by the hospital, then they would finish the investigation and formally charge me with the DUI. Once they have the blood results and investigation done, they will issue a warrant for my arrest.
I have been watching the different warrant inquiry sites and do not see it yet, but the lawyer I retained said he expected it pretty soon.
I have been watching the different warrant inquiry sites and do not see it yet, but the lawyer I retained said he expected it pretty soon.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 2,966
Originally Posted by rich624
was in the hospital overnight. That night, the cop came in and told me they were going to charge me with DUI, but did not make an arrest or charge me at that time. A lawyer told me they had to subpoena the blood taken by the hospital, then they would finish the investigation and formally charge me with the DUI.
Edit: I've had 2 dui's..the 1st one was seriously just total stupitidy and on a drinking holiday,but with the 2nd (7yrs later).. I could have killed myself and other's with doing that.. I have a thread on here about it. I owned both of them and didn't really ever question "what about/why me?"..It was ME that did it both times.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 4,251
Rich, I am so sorry for what has happened to you and to the other people involved. It sounds like this has just happened so you are fresh in all the emotions and confusion of what will happen. I relate to that having received a DUI at the beginning of the summer. I was so fortunate that I did not hurt myself or anyone else, but the consequences are very high where I live and I was initially overwhelmed by grief, guilt and confusion.
You have got to pull yourself together as soon as possible and this means pulling out all the stops. No more saying AA won't work for you, or this or that isn't the right thing. You need anything and everything now to stay sober and have support. Call on friends and family to surround and support you. I could not have emotionally survived the first weeks without the support that came to me from the most random of places. My neighbours (with whom I only have a passing "hello" relationship) offered rides to the grocery store, brought by home cooked meals to offer me, checked in on me. My old manager at my previous job stopped by every night to check on me. My cleaning lady (whom I had to let go do to losing my job and this) came by to check on me, talk to me (she had always dreamed of being a psychologist), and clean the house for free. These are people who simply came out of the woodwork and instead of turning them away in shame I willingly accepted every bit of care and concern. I truly believe they keep me alive.
If you don't have family or friends, then AA is a great place for support. My sponsor has been here for me every day, in every way.
This is no time to dwell on why you didn't notice the outpatient rehab sooner. You didn't. No you have. Keep going.
Why were innocent people involved? Because that is what happens when we drink alcoholically. It is horrific to consider, but it is the truth. The only way to make things right is by getting and staying sober and then trying to do something meaningful with your life beyond this.
I unfortunately do not have the opportunity to attend AA meetings where I live. But my sponsor regularly shares stories she had heard throughout the years in meetings and there are some amazing stories of people coming back from the depths of hell- just things that are unimaginable to comprehend- and are living good, sober lives of integrity.
The lawyer is a must, no matter the cost. You cannot get through something so serious without professional legal help.
My case is less serious due to there not being injuries involved but the consequences here are major, including having my car taken from me immediately and forever. When I am able to reapply for my license I will have to buy a new car. Other consequences being I will have to reapply for my license every year for 10 years, each time requiring a thorough blood, urine and hair exam to test for drugs and alcohol. All of this is going to cost money and time. Right now I am doing anything and everything asked of me and more. If my lawyer tells me to shave my head and paint my body green, I'll do it. Listen to your lawyer. Beyond listening to your lawyer get and stay sober, it is the only way you will make it through this and be able to start putting your life back together on the other side.
Sending you strength and hope.
You have got to pull yourself together as soon as possible and this means pulling out all the stops. No more saying AA won't work for you, or this or that isn't the right thing. You need anything and everything now to stay sober and have support. Call on friends and family to surround and support you. I could not have emotionally survived the first weeks without the support that came to me from the most random of places. My neighbours (with whom I only have a passing "hello" relationship) offered rides to the grocery store, brought by home cooked meals to offer me, checked in on me. My old manager at my previous job stopped by every night to check on me. My cleaning lady (whom I had to let go do to losing my job and this) came by to check on me, talk to me (she had always dreamed of being a psychologist), and clean the house for free. These are people who simply came out of the woodwork and instead of turning them away in shame I willingly accepted every bit of care and concern. I truly believe they keep me alive.
If you don't have family or friends, then AA is a great place for support. My sponsor has been here for me every day, in every way.
This is no time to dwell on why you didn't notice the outpatient rehab sooner. You didn't. No you have. Keep going.
Why were innocent people involved? Because that is what happens when we drink alcoholically. It is horrific to consider, but it is the truth. The only way to make things right is by getting and staying sober and then trying to do something meaningful with your life beyond this.
I unfortunately do not have the opportunity to attend AA meetings where I live. But my sponsor regularly shares stories she had heard throughout the years in meetings and there are some amazing stories of people coming back from the depths of hell- just things that are unimaginable to comprehend- and are living good, sober lives of integrity.
The lawyer is a must, no matter the cost. You cannot get through something so serious without professional legal help.
My case is less serious due to there not being injuries involved but the consequences here are major, including having my car taken from me immediately and forever. When I am able to reapply for my license I will have to buy a new car. Other consequences being I will have to reapply for my license every year for 10 years, each time requiring a thorough blood, urine and hair exam to test for drugs and alcohol. All of this is going to cost money and time. Right now I am doing anything and everything asked of me and more. If my lawyer tells me to shave my head and paint my body green, I'll do it. Listen to your lawyer. Beyond listening to your lawyer get and stay sober, it is the only way you will make it through this and be able to start putting your life back together on the other side.
Sending you strength and hope.
Guest
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 70
Don'tRemember:
they did pull a blood sample while in the hospital. The police have to subpoena that sample, then I will be charged.
Everything hinges on the blood sample and how badly the people were hurt.
I honestly cannot believe these things as I am writing them, I never thought I would sink this low.
I was just lucky this didn't happen before, and the reason it did was, I was doing it so often, the odds caught up with me.
I would expect due to my injuries, I might get more than the minimum of 51 months. Going from Network Engineer to inmate.
I have allowed alcohol to completely rob me. I looked at that post I made four years ago. If I had stuck to my guns, I would have a ton more money in the bank, could have retired this year and be much healthier. I gained 25 pounds in those four years and it was all alcohol.
I have no one but myself to blame, my only hope is the other people involved are going to be ok.
they did pull a blood sample while in the hospital. The police have to subpoena that sample, then I will be charged.
Everything hinges on the blood sample and how badly the people were hurt.
I honestly cannot believe these things as I am writing them, I never thought I would sink this low.
I was just lucky this didn't happen before, and the reason it did was, I was doing it so often, the odds caught up with me.
I would expect due to my injuries, I might get more than the minimum of 51 months. Going from Network Engineer to inmate.
I have allowed alcohol to completely rob me. I looked at that post I made four years ago. If I had stuck to my guns, I would have a ton more money in the bank, could have retired this year and be much healthier. I gained 25 pounds in those four years and it was all alcohol.
I have no one but myself to blame, my only hope is the other people involved are going to be ok.
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