New to SR
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 16
New to SR
Good Afternoon,
I decided to give this whole sobriety thing a try. I was religiously drinking 6-8 shots of 103 proof Whiskey along with about 6 beers every night, every night and smoking about a pack of Camel unfiltered Cigarettes. I decided that I'm just damn sick of feeling like this, not to mention all the money this little habit costs.
I tried this before but probably for the wrong reasons - e.g., I wanted to look better. At this point, I don't care if I look like Schrek as long as I feel better. I feel sick, tired, depressed, lethargic, sweaty, red and disgusting every day. I've been avoiding people, events etc. because I feel so ****** about myself and don't want anyone seeing me like this. None of my cloths fit very well because I have a huge gut.
So I figured I'll make small goals. The first, I want to see a Sun Rise this weekend and not feel like I'm still in the acute phases of detox. Small goal but It's been a long time since I saw the Sun come up and breathed that Ocean air - maybe it will do something for me!
Anyway, Thanks for having a place to discuss such frustrations!
I decided to give this whole sobriety thing a try. I was religiously drinking 6-8 shots of 103 proof Whiskey along with about 6 beers every night, every night and smoking about a pack of Camel unfiltered Cigarettes. I decided that I'm just damn sick of feeling like this, not to mention all the money this little habit costs.
I tried this before but probably for the wrong reasons - e.g., I wanted to look better. At this point, I don't care if I look like Schrek as long as I feel better. I feel sick, tired, depressed, lethargic, sweaty, red and disgusting every day. I've been avoiding people, events etc. because I feel so ****** about myself and don't want anyone seeing me like this. None of my cloths fit very well because I have a huge gut.
So I figured I'll make small goals. The first, I want to see a Sun Rise this weekend and not feel like I'm still in the acute phases of detox. Small goal but It's been a long time since I saw the Sun come up and breathed that Ocean air - maybe it will do something for me!
Anyway, Thanks for having a place to discuss such frustrations!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,574
Welcome to a great place for encouragement, SLB.
I love your idea of the sunrise & ocean air. I went for years without enjoying my surroundings - it was all about when my next drink would be. It feels wonderful to be free of it.
I love your idea of the sunrise & ocean air. I went for years without enjoying my surroundings - it was all about when my next drink would be. It feels wonderful to be free of it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: LA - Lower Alabama
Posts: 5,068
I don't care if I look like Schrek as long as I feel better
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 1,543
I identify with a lot of what you have posted SLB. When I go on a prolonged bout of drinking I too avoid people and events due to my appearance. Overweight, anxious and generally feeling awful.
There’s nothing wrong with finding your desire to look good again as kick start to putting down the booze - but as you suggest sobriety needs to have a deeper meaning longer term.
There’s nothing wrong with finding your desire to look good again as kick start to putting down the booze - but as you suggest sobriety needs to have a deeper meaning longer term.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 16
Thank you, all of you. Hopefully this whole thing will get easier. Basically, I quit drinking, quit smoking, changed BP meds recently and just started an Anti-Anxiety med yesterday. All this wrapped around day 3 of not drinking/ smoking. I'm fuzzy, tired, sensitive to light, jumpy at loud or sudden noises, stomach hurts, eye balls hurt, back of head has pressure. Either way, I pealed my ass out of bed and came to face another stressful day at work with a boss that is trying to run me out. You almost have to laugh because it would be hard to make this up!
I figure it like this: If I'm to deal with this stress, I need to be sharp; if I get fired, I need to look for a job so I need to be at the top of my game; if I land one of the positions that I'm a finalist for, I need to have my **** together. Either way, this has to be done even at the risk of it killing me.
I figure it like this: If I'm to deal with this stress, I need to be sharp; if I get fired, I need to look for a job so I need to be at the top of my game; if I land one of the positions that I'm a finalist for, I need to have my **** together. Either way, this has to be done even at the risk of it killing me.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 148
Trees were my thing when I was first sober. I live in a very wooded area and used to trudge through every day with some level of hangover. Never looked at them.
They came to mean a great deal to me on stopping; their individuality, their lifeforce and their beauty. And you can hide in a forest if you want to. Ever really looked at a tree? Why not add a sunrise or a sunset to the scene?
The very best of luck to you.
They came to mean a great deal to me on stopping; their individuality, their lifeforce and their beauty. And you can hide in a forest if you want to. Ever really looked at a tree? Why not add a sunrise or a sunset to the scene?
The very best of luck to you.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 16
Up to Day 10 here. Feeling pretty good, except I can't seem to get enough sleep. I could literally sleep all day if I didn' t peel myself out of bed. I'm finally getting decent sleep though. The first week sucked. I was lucky to sleep 4 out of 8-10 hours. The other good thing is that I've lost about 12 pounds and a couple of inches off the old 'Beer Holding Tank'
Member
Join Date: Jun 2018
Posts: 462
Originally Posted by Awake61 
I woke up in the middle of the night a couple of nights ago. The moon was full and my heart soared. I wept, thinking of all the time I missed so much beauty around me. Stay on the path.
I'm partial to a bit of moon gazing myself.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 674
Originally Posted by SLB68
Small goals.
And every now and then you hit a home run.
-B
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