lola1987

My partner has just come up to me and said will we drink tonight I said no I don't want to drink anymore. Then he said come on il pay for it I said no I don't want to it gives me pains in my liver I don't want to drink anymore. He then said well I am. Ok that's fine. He knows full well I had a problem with drink and I don't want to drink anymore. I'm not sure if I crave it as much but I think about it a lot. He then says it's New Years we were invited to my mams so I think il go. Everyone will be drinking over there. I don't want to drink. What do I do?

InApickle

Imagine if you went tonight and didn't drink, imagine if you found the strength to just glug on lemonade, lime and soda or any other soft drink available. Imagine the feeling tomorrow morning knowing you didn't drink under the hardest conditions imaginable.

I think it would feel pretty darned good. I don't believe it can get any harder than this and the challenge to remain sober rewards you tomorrow with the greatest sensation you could possibly believe possible!

Watching people get drunk, slurring their words and making themselves look stupid can be quite entertaining so keep your camera on standby!

Good luck OP

Zanna

I think pains in the liver would answer the question for me, in all honesty.
Stay strong and Happy New Year when your time comes.

AnvilheadII

our name for New Year's Eve is Amateur Night.....way too many people drinking way too much. and for what?

would be much better to stay home, safe n sound n sober. and wake up sober. and remember what happened.

biminiblue

Right? That and St. Pats and Cinco de Mayo. I always stayed as far away as possible from roads and bars and parties on those nights.

It's dangerous out there.

lola, your BF is looking for a drinking buddy. Hold your line. Be firm with him about this. It's doubtful he's going to quit drinking so are you okay with that?

Does he drink a lot? You should drive if you do go. Please.

DarklingSong

That really tough Lola....but try and play the tape forward. Truly its not worth drinking. This damn day will be over soon. Tomorrow, sober will look so much better.
Support to you.
DS

lola1987

Thank you everyone for your replies. I have spoken to him and told him I will be staying home that I do not feel up for going. He is ok with that he said he will stay too but he will still be drinking. I'm not happy about that but what can I do. I'm the alcoholic not him. He has begun drinking a lot more now that I have stopped. Strange really as he never drank before. He can find a drinking buddy elsewhere tonight because I am off to bed at 9pm with a hot chocolate and my book and I will be up bright and early tomorrow to walk my dog😀. Fresh headed also.

Zanna

Hot Chocolate sounds good to me

Berrybean

Sounds like you get the sofa and TV to yourself then.

I'm going to an AA meeting this evening sk will get to meet uo with some folk who understand why i dont want to drink.
That will finish about 8.45pm and on the way home I might stop for my fave take away. Perhaps.
My Pjs will be on the radiator so nice and warm and cosy and I'm in the middle of a brilliant book.
It just another night. I never liked NYE much even when I was drinking though, so I won't be missing it much at all.

What do you LIKE to do in your free time other than drink. Perhaps that would inform your decision? You can break with tradition and do something you like. Are you an artist? A cook? Someone who likes to talk? Do you have other sober friends or family you can get together with or spend time on the phone with.

Sometimes it's so easy to get hypnotized by the one thing we can't do that we are completely blinkered by it and can't see all the thousands of other possibilities.

BB

biminiblue

Have you seen the movie "Chocolat"? (Johnny Depp, before we knew he was an abusive drunk.)

In that movie he drinks hot chocolate with (something hot like) chilis or cayenne. I've had both in hot chocolate, and it's yummy! Just a little twist for your New Year's bang.

Good choice, lola.

Anna

You've made a great choice for yourself for tonight and a good way to bring in the New Year.

DarklingSong

Good for you Lola.

JustTony

Staying home was the right thing to do.

Never understood the love for NYE. I always thought it was a c**p, loud, expensive, over-rated pile of dog doo doo.

lola1987

Thanks everyone. He is sat downstairs drinking. God how i am craving right now. But no I can't do it. I'm upstairs playing board games with my child.

JustTony

Ignore the craving.

I accepted I wasn't drinking tonight ages ago - once you do that you simply move your mind to other things.

Spending time with your child is precious, rewarding and nurturing. Drinking is destructive and self harming.

It's no choice really is it?

You're doing great

lola1987

I really feel like I'm going to cave😭😭😭

Delilah1

I'm glad you are staying home, not chocolate sounds fantastic, I may be having the same later.

I have two years sober (tomorrow) and my husband still drinks. It bugged me at first, but it doesn't anymore. Most of the time he has 1 or 2 beers, it every now and then he has more, and I make it a point to mention how chipper I am bright and early the next morning, I know it sounds a little childish, but we all need a little entertainment every now and then!

Ariesagain

Don’t cave!

What’s behind it? Is ut that you’re craving alcohol or is it that you feel pressure to join him in drinking?

Remember...a bright, early and fresh-headed dog walk is only a few hours away, yes?

lola1987

I absolutely love this. I was thinking of doing the exact same tomorrow😂. I think that is what is getting me through does that sound terrible. I have my cousin calling tomorrow at 9am purposely i scedualed this time so I would not drink to teach me all about make up application as I would love to pursue this as a career. I'm trying desperately hard to fit things into times id normally cave. So myself and my cousin may just turn the music up and extra notch while my other half is severely hungover in bed and have a laugh and a coffee😀😀.

DarklingSong

Brilliant idea!