Envy
Member
Join Date: Jun 2016
Location: Adelaide, Australia
Posts: 28,670
I get angry at myself at getting angry. Really good you can identify this with the envy- not their fault you canna drink of course. You also shared about it to vent. KEEP POSTING.
Support to you, PJ.
Support to you, PJ.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Kampala, Uganda
Posts: 327
Envy did occur to me as a possible emotion to have and it's good that you've brought it up here. However, I came to the conclusion that I couldn't possibly envy people who are content with just one glass of wine, or a few sips of bubbly, etc. This is simply because in my drinking life/career, I DO NOT EVER just drink one glass of wine. That's not what I want. I want the whole bottle. So, if i'm to envy anybody, it'd be the alcoholics who are still drinking and since that is not who I want to be any longer, then there's nothing to envy. Simple as that.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Kampala, Uganda
Posts: 327
Actually, scrap the last statement. I do envy a particular category of people. I envy those who have never drank and those who did drink but didn't develop a taste for it. I really , truly envy teetotalers. I wish i'd never started drinking to begin with!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Kampala, Uganda
Posts: 327
Originally Posted by JoeCree 
Envy goes away once you accept the nature of your problem. Good on you for recognizing it.
I often think (compare) to dieters who have eating disorders. As you "envy" the guy who has a merlot, imagine the dieter or obese person who envys you for polishing off a desert.
As much as the "woe is me" phase did pass, i thank the lord i didnt have an obsession with food (watching TLC 600lb stories). Alcohol is poisonous to us, and makes sense to not drink it, but we NEED food to live.
I often think (compare) to dieters who have eating disorders. As you "envy" the guy who has a merlot, imagine the dieter or obese person who envys you for polishing off a desert.
As much as the "woe is me" phase did pass, i thank the lord i didnt have an obsession with food (watching TLC 600lb stories). Alcohol is poisonous to us, and makes sense to not drink it, but we NEED food to live.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Posts: 403
Originally Posted by Alan6154
I am on day 106 and I still have Envy. That is how I know I am still early into my journey. Beating the physical dependence was tough (read "Horrible") but coming to terms with the reality of a lifelong commitment isn't any piece of cake either.
I can never say this out loud to those I care about because I don't want to try to make my problem theirs but..
I envy my Wife who can go out and have a few drinks with her friends and be responsible.
I envy my friends who I go out to a nice dinner with and they can enjoy a Merlot or Chianti without finishing the bottle.
I envy my relatives who can sip on a good Scotch and appreciate it for what it is without downing half a bottle.
I envy my neighbor who can finish mowing his lawn and enjoy a cold beer without feeling the need to finish off the rest of the case.
There is a difference to me between quitting drinking and alcohol avoidance. I do not live up the street from Dorothy and Toto. Alcohol is all around me, it's on TV, the radio, magazines, novels. Hell it's in my house. I'm not going to take the long way home because I go past a liquor store on my normal route. I am not going to give a rotted fermented potato that much power over me. AND I cannot live in a bubble.
So until my brain rewires. I have Envy.....
I can never say this out loud to those I care about because I don't want to try to make my problem theirs but..
I envy my Wife who can go out and have a few drinks with her friends and be responsible.
I envy my friends who I go out to a nice dinner with and they can enjoy a Merlot or Chianti without finishing the bottle.
I envy my relatives who can sip on a good Scotch and appreciate it for what it is without downing half a bottle.
I envy my neighbor who can finish mowing his lawn and enjoy a cold beer without feeling the need to finish off the rest of the case.
There is a difference to me between quitting drinking and alcohol avoidance. I do not live up the street from Dorothy and Toto. Alcohol is all around me, it's on TV, the radio, magazines, novels. Hell it's in my house. I'm not going to take the long way home because I go past a liquor store on my normal route. I am not going to give a rotted fermented potato that much power over me. AND I cannot live in a bubble.
So until my brain rewires. I have Envy.....
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,443
I found the more I built a sober life I loved - that is changed my old drink centered life - the more I loved it and the less drinking was a desire for me.
If drinking was my escape, building a life I didn't want to escape from was a great help
D
If drinking was my escape, building a life I didn't want to escape from was a great help
D
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