Introducing myself
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 12
Introducing myself
Hi everyone! I wanted to introduce myself because I think I'll be around here quite often 
I've been drinking since I was 15, nearing 30 now. Heavily the past 7 or so years. Something clicked and I just realized how I am living is so wrong. I started drinking because I didn't like myself, I lacked confidence and couldn't make friends. But all drinking did was make me act like an idiot and push people away further. I've embarrassed myself for the last time (due to alcohol at least ha!) I was completely blacking out nearly nightly, hiding bottles, sneaking drinks when people would leave the room, worrying when I'd get the next drink, scrounging for change to buy more... My adult life so far has revolved around alcohol, and I know I'll have to learn to just "be" without it. I really have no clue who I am. Honestly, I'm so scared but hopeful. I think this forum will be a place of comfort and resource for me.
I have two daughters, who I really thought weren't effected by my drinking. How clouded my head was. I know I can't go back, so I'm going to try every day to do my best for them and hope they don't grow up and resent me.
Anyway, I'm on day 5. The physical stuff I think is passed, thank goodness. Had the shakes, sweats, headaches, insomnia, hallucinations. I wish I would have gotten medical help and made it a bit more comfortable, but oh well.
I have been looking into AA meetings in my area. I'm pretty nervous about going to the first one, but I'm sure once I get that one out of the way it won't be so bad.
Thanks for having me here and I can't wait to get to know you guys
I've been drinking since I was 15, nearing 30 now. Heavily the past 7 or so years. Something clicked and I just realized how I am living is so wrong. I started drinking because I didn't like myself, I lacked confidence and couldn't make friends. But all drinking did was make me act like an idiot and push people away further. I've embarrassed myself for the last time (due to alcohol at least ha!) I was completely blacking out nearly nightly, hiding bottles, sneaking drinks when people would leave the room, worrying when I'd get the next drink, scrounging for change to buy more... My adult life so far has revolved around alcohol, and I know I'll have to learn to just "be" without it. I really have no clue who I am. Honestly, I'm so scared but hopeful. I think this forum will be a place of comfort and resource for me.
I have two daughters, who I really thought weren't effected by my drinking. How clouded my head was. I know I can't go back, so I'm going to try every day to do my best for them and hope they don't grow up and resent me.
Anyway, I'm on day 5. The physical stuff I think is passed, thank goodness. Had the shakes, sweats, headaches, insomnia, hallucinations. I wish I would have gotten medical help and made it a bit more comfortable, but oh well.
I have been looking into AA meetings in my area. I'm pretty nervous about going to the first one, but I'm sure once I get that one out of the way it won't be so bad.
Thanks for having me here and I can't wait to get to know you guys
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Posts: 56
Hi shellster in very similar situation myself only been properly using this site for a few days but it's really helped I'm on day 2. Luckily my relapse wasn't as bad to get full withdrawals but i remeber them well. Good luck 😀
Giving up is NOT an option.
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Western Wisconsin
Posts: 7,809
Hi Shellster, and welcome. You sound a lot like me - But younger by 20 or so years. When I was still drinking I was constantly obsessing on where and when I could next drink. And like you, I thought it wasn't really affecting my kids or anyone but myself. HUGE amounts of denial going on there.
I do highly recommend AA. It's hard to do this alone. Also keep posting here and find the Class of January 2017 thread. Wishing you the best of luck.
When I was still drinking I was constantly obsessing on where and when I could next drink. And like you, I thought it wasn't really affecting my kids or anyone but myself. HUGE amounts of denial going on there. I do highly recommend AA. It's hard to do this alone. Also keep posting here and find the Class of January 2017 thread. Wishing you the best of luck.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: MN
Posts: 8,704
Welcome to SR Shellster. Glad you made it through the withdrawal period without any major complications, you should be fine now. If you remain sober you will never have to go through that again. I really like what you said about finding out who you are. I think its so important. And it can only he done sober and with a clear head. You might find out you're a heckuva guy!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 6
I just arrived yesterday, I too started around age 15, but its taken me until age 54 to get serious. I really relate to the fact that I probably don't know myself, because of my entire adult life I gave so much to the alcohol. I was thinking about that during my jog this a.m., calculating the years and feeling sad about it. I never had kids, I wonder if its because I was too dedicated to partying. Anyway, best of luck. I'm thinking the next 40 years sober (God willing) will be just awesome.
Guest
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Nice to meet you! You sound aware and thoughtful about what drinking has done to your life. You can change that and have a completely different and far better life sober.
I think your idea about AA is a super one. Good luck. Hope to see you around here!
I think your idea about AA is a super one. Good luck. Hope to see you around here!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 5
Yes I'm starting this journey about 15 years later than you. I regret spending so much of my adult life in an alcohol fog. I've missed out on a lot.
You're at a great point right now with this opportunity. Take it and run!
You're at a great point right now with this opportunity. Take it and run!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Glen Allen, Va
Posts: 2,589
Welcome aboard Shellster, Alexf91, and Gr82bFree! You're all close enough, I'd join the class of 2017 February thread whenever that appears this week to chat with people just showing up. Or January! Up to you! Anyways, hope you find help here.
Aka.. Indamiricale. :)
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Dr.Bob's Neighbor
Posts: 2,728
Originally Posted by Shellster 
I have been looking into AA meetings in my area. I'm pretty nervous about going to the first one, but I'm sure once I get that one out of the way it won't be so bad.
Thanks for having me here and I can't wait to get to know you guys
Perfect attitude. The hardest part is not letting our mind talk us out of it. Because the people on that other side of the door. Are just like you and me..
And the most important person in the room is the newcomer. So please try to tell someone your new. And you will be amazed at the love.
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