Feeling out of control
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 8
Thank you all very much for your kind words and support. I live alone, and I feel very lonely without alcohol. I did pretty good today. I kept checking in here and reading posts and stories and I thank you all for that.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 8
Originally Posted by Anna 
Welcome, Ashlee!
I hated the person I'd become. Like you, my life became smaller and smaller because I preferred to be home alone, drinking. Have faith that you can do this. My suggestions for the early days are to make sure you have no alcohol in the house, change your daily routine, and work on a plan for recovery. We're here for you.
I hated the person I'd become. Like you, my life became smaller and smaller because I preferred to be home alone, drinking. Have faith that you can do this. My suggestions for the early days are to make sure you have no alcohol in the house, change your daily routine, and work on a plan for recovery. We're here for you.
Can I try again tomorrow? I would like to. I can do tomorrow.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: UK
Posts: 48
Hi Ashlee,
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. Please do try again. What has helped me so much over the last two years is reading other people's stories. On this website, on others, in books. Learning from them, feeling less alone because other people knew what it was like. And forgiving myself. Realising that I would never be able to cope with life unless I stopped drinking.
Let us know how you're getting on!
X
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences. Please do try again. What has helped me so much over the last two years is reading other people's stories. On this website, on others, in books. Learning from them, feeling less alone because other people knew what it was like. And forgiving myself. Realising that I would never be able to cope with life unless I stopped drinking.
Let us know how you're getting on!
X
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 379
I absolutely love the fact that you told on your illness, " Im lying, I drank some wine" thats fricking AWESOME because it takes ALL the power away from that inner voice. I have that inner voice as well, it sounds like me but it tells me LIES and keeps trying to take me back to who i was and what I was doing before I got sober. It wants me sick, tired, feeling worthless and DRUNK!
But BAM! Im not going to give in to that voice ( my illness) because you know what? Theres another voice in there, its mine too and it started out sort of small and its the one that tells me " You deserve to be happy and healthy, you've suffered enough dear one, you are beautiful and you can do this!" In the beginning it was a small voice but everyday it is getting louder and louder and drowning out that other self destructive voice!
So yeah dont buy wine or liquor today. Buy yourself some yummy drinks like flavored water, sparkling water, soda, whatever non alcoholic beverage you like. Get some chocolate or ice cream or yummy snack so when you get the craving you can grab that instead. It works, it really will.
Im proud of you for your honesty and your commitment. Stay close to us and let us help you over this initial hump!
But BAM! Im not going to give in to that voice ( my illness) because you know what? Theres another voice in there, its mine too and it started out sort of small and its the one that tells me " You deserve to be happy and healthy, you've suffered enough dear one, you are beautiful and you can do this!" In the beginning it was a small voice but everyday it is getting louder and louder and drowning out that other self destructive voice!
So yeah dont buy wine or liquor today. Buy yourself some yummy drinks like flavored water, sparkling water, soda, whatever non alcoholic beverage you like. Get some chocolate or ice cream or yummy snack so when you get the craving you can grab that instead. It works, it really will.
Im proud of you for your honesty and your commitment. Stay close to us and let us help you over this initial hump!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2016
Posts: 8
I won't drink today. I am so sick of this cycle! I will buy the sparkling water and the yummy snacks and I'll be the powerful one today who starts the end of this cycle. I know I can do it today, absolutely I can.
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Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 8,674
Welcome! In addition to what everyone has said...what is a real life plan? Now would be a great time to keep not drinking for today, and try an AA meeting.
You mention loved ones so it sounds like there are folks who care about you- have you thought about opening up to them, and asking for help? Many of us had people wanting to help us, perhaps not knowing how, and I know I have found that when I FINALLY stopped drinking (after so many years of darkness and insanity) I have found and been able to develop a ton of support.
And even just around here- I promise you that there is someone here who knows whatever it is you feel like, has done what you've done, understands where you are....all of it.
You can get and stay sober. It really is so much better on this side. Good luck and I hope to see you around.
You mention loved ones so it sounds like there are folks who care about you- have you thought about opening up to them, and asking for help? Many of us had people wanting to help us, perhaps not knowing how, and I know I have found that when I FINALLY stopped drinking (after so many years of darkness and insanity) I have found and been able to develop a ton of support.
And even just around here- I promise you that there is someone here who knows whatever it is you feel like, has done what you've done, understands where you are....all of it.
You can get and stay sober. It really is so much better on this side. Good luck and I hope to see you around.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: UK
Posts: 6,902
Can you de-booze the house now, in readiness for tomorrow being your new sobriety date.
Also, it's good to bear in mind the H.A.L.T. triggers. HUNGRY ANGRY LONELY and TIRED. All of these things weaken our resolve so any good action plan should include strategies for avoiding these things, and what to do it they sneak up on us.
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and future recovery. BB
Also, it's good to bear in mind the H.A.L.T. triggers. HUNGRY ANGRY LONELY and TIRED. All of these things weaken our resolve so any good action plan should include strategies for avoiding these things, and what to do it they sneak up on us.
Wishing you all the best for your sobriety and future recovery. BB
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I'm glad you felt you could be honest here Ashlee 
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got it.
The key is to try something different this time - ridding your house of booze is a great move - maybe committing to posting here first if you find yourself in trouble again is another good idea?
D
Many of us faltered a time or two before we got it.
The key is to try something different this time - ridding your house of booze is a great move - maybe committing to posting here first if you find yourself in trouble again is another good idea?
D
Member
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: northern california
Posts: 740
Ashlee time to fill yourself with recovery, take advantage of all that is available
1 SR
2 rehab if needed
3 free recovery like AA, Smart Recovery there are many more
good luck and keep posting here
1 SR
2 rehab if needed
3 free recovery like AA, Smart Recovery there are many more
good luck and keep posting here
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